I bet your bf/husband is really pleased

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13

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  • MercenaryNoetic26
    MercenaryNoetic26 Posts: 2,747 Member
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    I'd see that as a compliment. Maybe they're saying, "Wow, bet your husband is pleased!" because they'd be pleased to get with that themselves!

    My husband and myself have had this talk. We both know we wouldn't dig it if either one of us got lazy and fat for no reason at all. If one of us came up with a debilitating disease that caused weight-gain, then that would be the exception. We have this understanding and stay on track knowing this. If I get pregnant, I know I'll bounce back for myself and it'll keep us both happier.

    If you hook up with someone when they're skinny and they blow up like a blimp, while you stay trim, well that's just not fair! A couple should do their part to be a fit couple. Blow up together or stay fit together.
  • leynak
    leynak Posts: 963 Member
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    I really wouldn't be offended if someone said something like this to me. It's just a compliment. And after all my work I want my fiance to be proud of what I've done. My fiance has always loved me & told me I didn't have to lose weight but I wanted to, to make myself feel better.

    But seriously, I was over 200lbs(obese). Just because my fiance loved me doesn't mean that he shouldn't think I'm more attractive when I lose weight. Of course I'm going to be hotter! I won't be overweight! And I'm sure he will be happy. :smile:
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
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    If i could speak on my own personal experience, well since I have dropped some weight and started working out I feel better, i have more confidence and I am starting to look so much better therefore radiating confidence and awesomeness which is a helluva lot better than a depressed *****y overweight person that i was. Which in turn makes my husband want to be around me more and in turn causes he and i both to be a lot more happy.

    Its a viscious cycle.

    I do care what my husband thinks. I am not however killing myself at the gym for him. Thats for myself. The rest is a bonus!
  • CandeesLand
    CandeesLand Posts: 200
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    Funny, my wife say's even after twentyfive pounds their's no change and I am still fat and disgusting! Wonder what she'll say after fifty?

    After fifty you should ask your new wife.

    Checkmate!
  • StaceyL76
    StaceyL76 Posts: 711 Member
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    I think the reason women make comments like that is really to make single women feel bad that they don't have a man to be pleased with their weightloss.

    LOL! Seriously!
  • MisterDubs303
    MisterDubs303 Posts: 1,216 Member
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    Just because someone might accept their spouse while heavier doesn't mean they can't or shouldn't appreciate the healthier, and more visually pleasing version. I think it's hypocritical to judge a partner for being pleased with the healthier change when some of us, who are trying to lose weight, didn't even like ourselves at our heavier weight. Why would it be ok for me to be miserable at a high or unhealthy weight, but expect my spouse to be ok with it?
  • hannahbellelechter
    hannahbellelechter Posts: 79
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    I had a boyfriend in highschool once who would tell me "You would be so hot if you just thinned out. You're overweight. Stop eating so much. Don't eat that. Go to the gym. You could look like Carmen Electra if you really tried." etc, etc. Then we broke up and he called me a fatty for the rest of the time I knew him.

    That experience definitely made me never want to shape up for anyone else but myself.

    12785056.png
    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools
  • Britt2Fitjrny
    Britt2Fitjrny Posts: 558 Member
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    Life's so much better when you give people the benefit of a doubt, and assume that they are not out to get you.

    relaxing-on-the-beach.jpg

    :heart: IT!! So True! :happy:
  • HeelsAndBoxingGloves
    HeelsAndBoxingGloves Posts: 916 Member
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    Just because someone might accept their spouse while heavier doesn't mean they can't or shouldn't appreciate the healthier, and more visually pleasing version.

    I :heart: you buddy! You hit the nail on the head there!
  • MiloBloom83
    MiloBloom83 Posts: 2,724 Member
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    I've read several bogs & forum posts of women who have lost their weight or posted about their progress so far & alot of them have replies along the lines of "wow, well done, I bet your husband is really pleased"" or something similar.

    It bugs me quite a bit as it implies that 1) they only lost weight for the benefit of their bf or husband 2) that the person losing the weight should only feel proud of their achievement once they have received validation from their bf or husband 3) that their husbands or bf were somehow dissatisfied with the person before the weight loss.

    This isn't some feminist agenda but I rarely see this comment made on male MFP'ers posts charting the same achievement & it is always made by women, so I just wondering what this type of comment implies?

    My wife is on MFP and she's lost 36 pounds. She wanted to lose weight for herself, not for me, and to be more competitive in her age group in triathlons and running. I thought she was hot before, and i think she's hot now. And for the record, i am proud of her. What she has accomplished is no small feat.
    I think that the people making the "Your husband must be pleased" comments are just forgetting to put the "hubba-hubba" after the comment, preferring to just leave it implied. :happy:
  • MDWilliams1857
    MDWilliams1857 Posts: 315 Member
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    Well the reality is, we all want to be found attractive by the opposite sex. We say we are doing this for us and that may be true to some extent but we all also want people to find us attractive. I know my wife loves me for who I am but I dont doubt for one second that she cant wait for me to lose weight and get ripped, and vice versa. Anyone that thinks their spouse doesnt care if they are fat or thin is just kidding themselves. They do. They might not be a total jerk that screams at you about being a pig, but they want you to lose weight and look good. Every guy wants other guys to think his wife looks good and every woman wants other women to think their husband looks good. Its human nature.
  • xo_jewel_xo
    xo_jewel_xo Posts: 696 Member
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    Funny, my wife say's even after twentyfive pounds their's no change and I am still fat and disgusting! Wonder what she'll say after fifty?

    After fifty you should ask your new wife.

    Yes!!

    I completely agree!!
  • LeanerBeef
    LeanerBeef Posts: 1,432 Member
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    My wife is pretty much like "eh", but my boyfriend loves it!
  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
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    Q: are you single?

    if yes.

    Q: can you get in the kitchen and cook?

    if yes

    A: Congrats, you look great. I have digital foliage for you.

    If any of these are no.

    A:
    bad-date-2.jpg
  • kschhr
    kschhr Posts: 103 Member
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    I think that's generally reading too far into it. Congratulating someone on losing weight is awkward. Good job! You're not a fatass anymore! It's just a filler.
  • Apazman
    Apazman Posts: 494 Member
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    They should just be honest about thier compliment and just say ... yeah .. "I'd hit that!"
  • Britt2Fitjrny
    Britt2Fitjrny Posts: 558 Member
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    I think the reason women make comments like that is really to make single women feel bad that they don't have a man to be pleased with their weightloss.

    ???? HUH???? :noway:

    Thats a joke right?
  • KimmieBrie
    KimmieBrie Posts: 825 Member
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    It's funny how much people read into one sentence....

    Who wouldn't be pleased the person they love is or trying to get "healthier"? And what's wrong with that?

    Just like happiness they quit smoking... or quit binge drinking... or any other unhealthy habit.

    AND appreciating an awesome physique doesn't mean they didn't love them before. Obviously they did or they wouldn't have been there to begin with.
  • nalia08
    nalia08 Posts: 252
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    I say use whatever reason need be to loose the weight. Whether it be husband, kids, healthy, clothes, pictures, family is skinny, friends are skinny or etc. We are all motivated by different things to do different things. Just remember to do it in a healthy way and be happy with you in the end.
  • _beachgirl_
    _beachgirl_ Posts: 3,865 Member
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    Holy double post.

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