Getting support from your Significant Other. NOT!

alofay

Why you want to make him run with you? You are not a 2 yrs old! All I heard are excuses.... the same thing about spend time
together.....
You should try to get healthy for yourself and that's it.
You can't change a person unless he's willing to change himself. The only thing you can do is cooking healthy food and if he does not want to eat then he should cook for himself.

If he make fun of you and try to break your spirit so you don't have a will to get healthy then you have something to complain about.
Stop make excuses and DO IT!

Mr. Fire Dragon. This wasn't about me making excuses for not being able to work out... I'm pretty sure my weight loss speaks for itself? I do work out but as my post said previously I am sacrificing time with the SO to do so.

alofay

My problem is that my boyfriend is kind of a know it all jerk when it comes to this sort of thing. He (and i love him to death) has a beer gut, and seems to think that if he ever wanted to get in shape, it's just going to take him three days and he can eat whatever he wants until then. He tries to tell me i need to start working out and that i shouldn't eat this or that because "i've eaten too much already". i just fluff it off and go on about my business doing what i want. He isn't supportive at all, doesn't think i'll ever be in shape (he has no room to talk) and doesn't ever say anything supportive or helpful.


So my situation is a bit different than yours, but kind of the same. Mine likes to sit around, drink beer and play xbox all day. I've started eating healthier, getting more active and just working on self improvement where i need to. So i guess in the end we'll see what happens.

As far as your situation goes, i would just give it some time. maybe he will see how hot you're getting, and how happy you are working out and stuff and he'll eventually want to do it too.

Is this a serious BF?

ILiftHeavyAcrylics

I think you should be having this discussion with your SO. Since it sounds like you're the one who changed, not him, he may not even realize this bothers you. And honestly, I don't think his not wanting to run constitutes lack of support unless there's a lot more to this story. My hubby and I have had to compromise on food a lot, since we both love to cook but he loves unhealthy recipes and I prefer more veggies and less fat. So we plan our meals together; I learn to make healthier alternatives to his favorites so he doesn't feel deprived and when he cooks he tries to include a healthier option for me. The point is that you're not going to be on the same page about every single thing, so you have to discuss what's important to both of you and figure out the best solution for you as a couple. Maybe that means you sacrifice a little by working out earlier in the day so that you can enjoy some down time with him later. Maybe it means 3 nights per week he agrees to go for a walk instead of sitting on the sofa. Whatever the solution is, you have to find it together.

livinginwoods

Maybe if the problem is sacrificing time at night you should get up earlier in the morning to run and put extra time into it so you can spend the evenings with your husband.

M_lifts

My hubby and i both work long hours and realise time is precious. when i joined mfp in jan he knew it was important to me and let me do my own thing. I didnt try and convert him- but he soon realised I was losing weight and as a result so was he because i was cooking for us! So something was working and since then he has been quite supportive as his clothes are loser and he is looking trim!

Running is not his thing and i havent forced it on him, PLus i get to go running and zumba in the evenings (2-3times a week) and he stays in with our daughter. So i get to get some 'me' time! During the summer he gets to play cricket and so is gone all day saturday- this is his exercise and its what he loves to do. We've just got a kinect and are looking forward to playing lots of games on it! So maybe find something similar you both enjoy? You could also try getting your workouts first thing in the morning so you can spend evenings together? Hope you find something that works for you both!

btw well done on your weight loss so far!

yankeedownsouth

I totally get what you're saying. It's not that you're upset that your husband isn't being supportive and it's not that you're making excuses to NOT do what you need to do... You just want to spend those two hours with your hubby, and it makes you upset that you can't do it.

I've totally been there. When my hubby came home from Iraq, I wanted to spend all my time with him. Heck, he's been home for a year and a few months now, and I still want to spend my evenings and free time with him. I ENJOY being with him. But he loves loves loves to sit on the couch. So when he came home, I ended up spending all my free time sitting on the couch rather than riding my bike or doing active things outdoors. And I gained weight - like 20 lbs. Ugh. And now that I am trying to lose it, I have to just accept the fact that I'm not going to get to sit on the couch with him at night as much as I want to. Especially since after I get home from work, I have to make dinner, clean up, deal with the kids, AND exercise somehow.

So yeah, it's easy to understand why you'd want him to spend part of those two hours taking a walk or doing something active with you.

Unfortunately, I don't really have any advice - just empathy. I feel your pain...

alofay

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who posted on this because it definitely opened up to the idea that just because Chad doesn't want to go for a run doesn't mean that he isn't supportive in his own ways. Also the comments aided in our very long personal discussion of the matter.

I'm happy to say that last night I helped Chad pack his lunch for work and totaled all of the calories with him and as of This morning he is an official MFP member

lol

chunkiedunker is his username if anyone is interested in adding him!

Thank you all again!

carrie_eggo

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who posted on this because it definitely opened up to the idea that just because Chad doesn't want to go for a run doesn't mean that he isn't supportive in his own ways. Also the comments aided in our very long personal discussion of the matter.

I'm happy to say that last night I helped Chad pack his lunch for work and totaled all of the calories with him and as of This morning he is an official MFP member

lol

chunkiedunker is his username if anyone is interested in adding him!

Thank you all again!

:happy: :drinker: :happy: