Friend snobs

tikanique

i wouldn't necessarily consider these people snobs. I have only two friends and will probably delete even those. I am on the site to read tips and get support in general. I dont need a "friend" to do that, i just read the forum, check out all the great success stories, track my own food & exercise and I'm good. Then again, I'm also not on facebook. too weird, too much sharing for me. doesn't make me a snob, just makes me different :-)

Arcamanda

Yes I understand, thank you. I am new here and am looking for a lot of support and motivation. I've gotten over 40 new friend requests since posting this and I will try and update my profile.

I looked at your profile earlier and you had 97 friends. For being new, that's pretty good.

I had about that many and I've been here a couple years. I trimmed about 30 of them last week because they were people I just never interact with and some friended me and then never posted anything and I forgot who they even were.

So, I'm not sure what you're complaining about with nearly 100 friends already. How many do you need?

Haha, yes most of those friends are from today. I went back and re-read my original post and I am not sure I was complaining. Just posting a general question. To each his own, no hard feelings. Have a blessed day.

Arcamanda

i wouldn't necessarily consider these people snobs. I have only two friends and will probably delete even those. I am on the site to read tips and get support in general. I dont need a "friend" to do that, i just read the forum, check out all the great success stories, track my own food & exercise and I'm good. Then again, I'm also not on facebook. too weird, too much sharing for me. doesn't make me a snob, just makes me different :-)

Yes, i understand. I would never call you a snob! Have a blessed day.

Arcamanda

Being selective about who you have as friends is hardly being a snob.

Exactly this.


Also I don't get along with stupid people.

Turns out, we would get along great!! Friend me!

sherrirb

I never turn down a friend request. I wont say that I keep every friend that sends me a request, but I'll never turn one down.

You never know how it will turn out and why take a chance that the next person sending you a request turns out to be an awesome source of inspiration?! Some really cool idea person that gives you some great recipes and it turns out that you went to the same daycare and your kids played parchessi together? Who knows!?!?

Now, that said, I do not always keep friends. I have deleted some that after friending them I see they post 27 random things on their "news" every half hour so that you cant see ANYTHING anyone else has posted, or just things they talk about are not really something I want to read about. I make the choice to unfriend after I've had the opportunity to see what kind of person they are.

Everyone should have an opportunity to show you what kind of person they are before you make any judgement, at least thats how it is in my book.

Feel free to add me, the more the merrier!

mznisaelaine

I can admit I'm a little selfish when it comes to my favorite MFP friends. I dont like to share!

I'm kidding!

I am not a snob

tmarie2715

Hi,
Just wondering why some people seem stingy about who their friend are on this app? I guess everybody is different but aren't we all here striving for the same goals? I love friends, the more the better!
It kind of puts me off when I ask to friend somebody (i always include a message!) and they completely blow me off. These same people are in the community forums over and over again so its not like I am asking people who never log in.
So if you feel the same way and we are not friends yet please friend me, i wont let you down...LOL

It takes me a great deal of time and effort to view all of my friends diaries, comment on their exercise, and otherwise actually interact with them. If I have too many friends or ****ty friends who never bother to comment on ANY of their other friends' statuses, I'm better off with a smaller number.

This isn't facebook-- I'm here to give and receive like minded support.

Wpbarr

If you interact with me on a daily basis for several weeks, I'll consider you an acquaintance. Extend that to several months, I'll consider you a "friend". Stop interacting with me and I'll assume you have lost interest. This is real life. My struggle is real. My setbacks are real. My accomplishments are real. MFP is one of the tools I use.

Pebble321

Perhaps I'm a snob - but I have a lot of friends on my list already (I've been on MFP for a year). If I get a friend request from someone with no message, very little info on their profile or someone who appears to have a completely different lifestyle or interests to me then I probably won't add them.
It isn't a reflection on them as a person, it just means that I have a lot of people already on my "friends" list and I find it hard enough to keep up with them as it is without adding more. The people I do add tend to be around my own age or with a similar viewpoint or interested in the same things.

Santabarbarafit

Hey there! I'll be ya fren

maidentl

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snob

My friends should feel special. :blushing:

We do. :flowerforyou:

ogosun

Being selective about who you have as friends is hardly being a snob.

must agree.... so right you are... ::)))

Elzecat

I friend'd a bunch of nasty hoes, and they were all innapropriate on my profile like, "Oooh, your pics r so sexy, we wanna touch your crotchal region..." and my wife was all, "Oh, hell no! Un-friend all those nasty hoes!"

So now I'm picky.

and I've learned a new word: "crotchal."

hehe.

fuzz_pawz

Hi,
Just wondering why some people seem stingy about who their friend are on this app? I guess everybody is different but aren't we all here striving for the same goals? I love friends, the more the better!
It kind of puts me off when I ask to friend somebody (i always include a message!) and they completely blow me off. These same people are in the community forums over and over again so its not like I am asking people who never log in.
So if you feel the same way and we are not friends yet please friend me, i wont let you down...LOL

My thought is that if people don't care enough to include a message to at least say hi...yes we may be working to the same goal...but why be friends with someone if you're never going to talk to them, share stories/recipes/motivations etc? They'll just be a number....like any other social network...so other people can see how many "friends" one has.

That's MY opinion of it...not saying it's correct, but that's what I see it as.
Personally, if I don't have anything in common with someone, and won't talk to them...I wouldn't consider myself a snob for not adding them. If they wanna say Hi and want to chit-chat, that's cool with me and I'll go ahead and add

twistyann

I'll be friends with any girl as long as we have something in common (other than the obvious)...if we're always posting on the same threads or if we're a part of another online community then sure lets be friends. But honestly, I don't want to be friends with any guys. IMO What's the point? I don't want to get creeped on. No offence to all the non creepy guys.

Pebble321

If Healthy mind=healthy body. Some of you are really unhealthy. ....just sayin :P

and she wonders why people don't want to be friends...... :ohwell:

carleyfunk

You can ask me to be your friend.

thisisabbie

Some people like to support their friends, by keeping in touch and commenting almost daily. This is REALLY hard to do if you have a big friends list.. Hence why some of us try and keep them small. Life just gets too busy sometimes to be on MFP for 5 hours a day keeping up with your friends!

If people include a message with their request, i'll definitely consider accepting, but if there's no message (as requested on my profile) then I will reject. Sorry.

Each to their own though

joehempel

Some people like to support their friends, by keeping in touch and commenting almost daily. This is REALLY hard to do if you have a big friends list.. Hence why some of us try and keep them small. Life just gets too busy sometimes to be on MFP for 5 hours a day keeping up with your friends!

If people include a message with their request, i'll definitely consider accepting, but if there's no message (as requested on my profile) then I will reject. Sorry.

Each to their own though

^^THIS.

I have less than 30 on my list, and I think that is still too large.

HonkyTonks

I've been finding it hard to keep up with my news feed and friends as my friends list grows, that's why I sorta needed to say on my profile that I can't do any more friend requests. However, I have never actually turned one down, nor have I deleted anybody. I have sent you a friend request.

rml_16

If Healthy mind=healthy body. Some of you are really unhealthy. ....just sayin :P

and she wonders why people don't want to be friends...... :ohwell:

I didn't see any snide remarks in this thread. A few joking comments followed by serious answers. Then the OP, after calling people snobs, got defensive and nasty. THEN she again requested more people to friend her.

For some reason, I'm not feeling inclined to do so. I can't figure out why ...

Arencey

I see friend list snobs everywhere on the internet, not just here. They're not worth your time, if they have to behave so childishly and put others down on the internet they probably don't have many friends IRL. That's how I look at it anyway

lisamarie1780

I hear ya

persistantone

I wouldn't take it so personally. It's just an online forum. Everyone socializes differently, has different definitions of friendship, and well, different priorities in life. To judge strangers as snobs for not "friending" back a random stranger doesn't make too much sense to me. Maybe because I'm an introvert? Despite my age (25) I've never been able to get into Facebook, for instance, because it makes no sense to me. For me, friendships are cultivated over time. But that doesn't mean I judge people who are much freer when it comes to connecting with others.

I don't know, i feel I've written too much already. People are people. It's okay to be different. No reason to take minor things so personally. Having them friend you back isn't going to change your life.

Oncebittentwiceshy38

I send requests knowing it's their choice. I don't take it personally AT ALL! Sometimes I forget I sent a request until I see them in my newsfeed.

Logical_Integrity

Hi,
Just wondering why some people seem stingy about who their friend are on this app? I guess everybody is different but aren't we all here striving for the same goals? I love friends, the more the better!
It kind of puts me off when I ask to friend somebody (i always include a message!) and they completely blow me off. These same people are in the community forums over and over again so its not like I am asking people who never log in.
So if you feel the same way and we are not friends yet please friend me, i wont let you down...LOL

I do not have any friends yet but I am one of those snobs you speak of. I don't like drama and complaining. I do not just accept anyone either and I think I should have a very small group of friends so I can properly support them instead of having 50+ and missing some. We aren't all striving for the same goals either, some are maintaining. Do not be put off by rejection for there is a reason they rejected you and to be perfectly honest you don't need an explanation of it. Could be something as simple as you say things that are ridiculous in forums or they don't agree with your views. Could be a many different things stop wasting your time caring why.... you don't need them to succeed. Screw them.

lilmissymoo90

i only add people i can relate to .. ive lost alot and still alot to go i refuse to add people with 14lbs or less to loose as within weeks they are gone ... i also delete constantly people who havent logged in a month or more i want people in the long haul like i am x

bethlaf

I think of the people who are on my friends list as just that friends.
while you can be friendly to everyone , i prefer to keep my friends to people who have similar goals, im not being a snob per se, but how can i help and support you if we are at complete opposite ends of the spectrum.
i am 10 year post op gastric bypass, a working mom of 5 who has 100lbs to lose who is struggling to simply exercise and eat right
while the last part is everyone's struggle
the first part is a rather small group
am i a snob if i don't reach out to people who aren't at least sharing some of my similarities? I don't think so

ImpossibleGrl

Because not everyone is meant to be friends with everyone else just because they are all on the same site? I mean, you aren't friends with everyone that you happen to be in the same room with at any given time. *shrug* This is my experience, I will use it as I see fit, and I expect others to do so as well.