About to Call it Quits

sweet110

If this feels like a negative journey, maybe you should call it quits. And I'm not just saying that because you weigh 120 lbs. I'd say the same think if you were 220.

If *this*, however you define this (MFP, trying to lose weight, etc), is bringing you LESS instead of MORE joy, then stop. Focus on something else. Focus on being a nice person. Have a goal of trying to read more. Be more social. Be more introspective...whatever *you* think is important for you to work on that you think may bring you more rather than less joy.

Good luck to you!

silhouettes

Lets say you burn 300 calories with turbo jam you add that to how many calories you're supposed to consume(1452) on exercise days you should eat 1752 calories(1452 + 300). Yes you should eat them, the reason is if you don't eat enough calories, what happens is you risk losing muscle mass (which slows down your metabolism) and will also impair thyroid function(controls how fast your metabolism is). So you will have 2 things working against you with weight loss. SO make sure you're eating your exercise calories.

EDT(Edit To Add): I saw you felt it was a waste of time to eat your exercise calories. No it's not, this is how MFP works. Lets say someone maintains weight at 2000 calories, they want to lose 1lbs a week they have to eat 1,500 to average about 1lbs a week. MFP will set you at 1,500 calories a week. So you already burn about 2000 calories a day, if they go and exercise and burn 300 calories, they will burn 2300 calories(not 2000), for them to hit 1lbs loss a week, they need to eat 1800 calories(calories burned through normal activity + exercise calories). If they don't eat them back, they will be eating 1500 calories and burning 2300, that's a big deficit, which will lead to the problems I discussed.

I'll try to eat them back but I fear I'll gain even more weight and then actually quit for real

I eat mine back and have lost 111 lbs! Slow and steady is the race.. just try to stay under your calories at least 6 days a week in the beginning, if you go over more than 1 or ALOT on that one.. it ruins the rest of the week, or so I found out.

Twinsmama75

It sounds like you are already at a healthy weight, so why not stop weighing yourself and start looking in the mirror and developing a healthier mentality about this process and about yourself? You sound like a person who will be unhappy with themselves no matter what they weigh. So perhaps that is what you really need to change - your negative thoughts and how you feel. You choose what you think, how you feel, and how you let other people and events in your life effect you.

What about strength training? This is a great way to have healthy non-scale goals and successes, as well as one of the the best ways to lower body fat percentage.

You have your health and whole lot of life to look forward too. Don't start sh!tting on yourself and depriving yourself of happiness at only 22 years old.

I agree with all this advice. And I wanted to add that perhaps you have stopped losing weight because you are at the lower end of what you should weigh. When I did WW years ago I lost a lot of weight and then just stopped and when I went to the doctor, she said I was actually underweight. IDK, goodluck and maybe take a break from the forums and just focus on healthy eating with a splurge every now and again?

granni87

Truthfully this is your journey. No one here finds it easy but we do it for ourselves. If you don't want it bad enough to do it then quitting this site won't make a difference no site will or can do it for you.. This is your decision I hope you make the right decision for the right reason. Don't look to others do it yourself, the rewards are amazing... Good luck in your future.

myogibbs

Please don't quit. You can do this...you just have to get creative. You can use your own body weight...do push-ups, dips (you can use a chair, the bed, even a counter in your kitchen or bathroom) I did that every day for about a month and I saw results. If you have belly fat, trust me it is only gonna get harder to keep it off as you age. Cardio is your friend...plus it helps improve your mood and mental health. As far a eating, you CAN eat what you want, but maybe not always when you want it. If you deprive yourself of anything, you are gonna obsess on it & then it becomes a "bad" food. Try a "splurge day" where you can have what you want, but then the rest of the week, try to be more healthy. Looks like for all the negativity you have experienced, there are people on here that want you to succeed. How about you prove the negative ones wrong & get healthy in the process? Heathy means loving yourself and being happy in your own skin. If you think you are fat at 120 lbs...maybe try not to be so obsessed with the scale & try to measure success by a pair of pants that are tight on you now. Try them on once a week, but don't get obsessed with that either. I was in Weight Watchers until one day I weighed and I gained ONE POUND. I cried all the way home. When I calmed down, I realized that wasn't healthy. Since WW is based on weight, I quit. Now I am in a program at my gym where they weighed me, allowed me not to look and actually blacked out my weight on my report. I will have to weigh, but it will be measured as loss & I am not freaking out about weight. I hope that helps. Keep trying...you can do this....

HorrorChix89

Replying to this again with a more positive outlook. Forgive me for my negative thinking right now I'm trying to lighten up.

Lets say you burn 300 calories with turbo jam you add that to how many calories you're supposed to consume(1452) on exercise days you should eat 1752 calories(1452 + 300). Yes you should eat them, the reason is if you don't eat enough calories, what happens is you risk losing muscle mass (which slows down your metabolism) and will also impair thyroid function(controls how fast your metabolism is). So you will have 2 things working against you with weight loss. SO make sure you're eating your exercise calories.

EDT(Edit To Add): I saw you felt it was a waste of time to eat your exercise calories. No it's not, this is how MFP works. Lets say someone maintains weight at 2000 calories, they want to lose 1lbs a week they have to eat 1,500 to average about 1lbs a week. MFP will set you at 1,500 calories a week. So you already burn about 2000 calories a day, if they go and exercise and burn 300 calories, they will burn 2300 calories(not 2000), for them to hit 1lbs loss a week, they need to eat 1800 calories(calories burned through normal activity + exercise calories). If they don't eat them back, they will be eating 1500 calories and burning 2300, that's a big deficit, which will lead to the problems I discussed.

So I burned about 250 calories working out (not with walking or driving but actually working out). Should I eat to make my NET calories match my budget? I know you probably answered it in this post but I just wanted to make sure I understand.

This is my calorie intake from just a few minutes ago (I add my calories on LoseIt!)

Clew

I am sorry that some people have been negative on the threads. I find that happens alot, plus there is lots of bad advice. Generally I keep away from the forums for that general reason. But the diary is a wonderful tool. And once you find some friends who have similar weightloss goals, its a nice boost to get some positive comments when you've done something well.

But the bottom line is this.....if losing weight was easy, there wouldn't be an obesity problem in many countries.
If it were easy, we'd all be slim and gorgeous.

All I can say is if you find what you are doing isn't working, then you've got to change it up. Talk to your doctor about what is the best plan for you in order to reach your specific goals. Taking advice from strangers online isn't always helpful -though they do usually mean well.

Also, look for ways to take more control of your life and your health. You said you can't control how and when you eat, maybe you need to re-examine your daily schedule and get creative - like carrying a healthy snack in your purse or car to help you through, pack a lunch or dinner, etc.

You also have dismissed lots of options for exercise, but maybe do some research to figure out what will work for you before you give up.

Whatever you decide, I wish you the best on your journey...

I second this comment, lady.

The forums can be really hostile sometimes, unfortunately. Build a nice group of MFP friends and lean on them for support, advice, and just a shoulder to cry on when you need to. This IS a frustrating undertaking, but don't give up. The biggest factor is to remember to be kind and forgiving to yourself.

Friend me if you like - you're not alone. :flowerforyou:

taso42

_GladOS_ has help you a lot here. You should also check out the "unofficial faq" to clear up some more questions/misconceptions.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/forums/show/474-unofficial-mfp-faq

And this is also a good overview
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/61706-guide-to-calorie-deficits

At least give it a shot doing things sensibly for a while before you declare you're calling it quits!

Titebootay757

Maybe you need to take a pause to evaluate why you think you have a weight problem. You say that you get down to 118 and then you're back up to 120 before you know it. Most people who read that statement would probably say "Really". There's quite a few people using this site to help them lose what you say you weigh or more. It seems as though you may have a problem with your body structure more than your weight you know like people say big boned or thick. There's nothing wrong with being either one of those things if you're healthy. I have friends that are big boned/thick that run, play tennis, roller blade, or in the gym just about 6 days a week and they are firm and very well toned. They accept and most importantly like their body structure. Maybe this site isn't for you because you haven't consulted a doctor before you started your weight management program. I recommend you get a clinic appointment and talk to a doctor about what you're trying to do and let them refer you to the right people that can assist you in determining why you aren't getting the results you want and give you the help you need. But, the most important thing though is that nobody is perfect. We are our own worst critiques; no matter how beautiful someone can tell you you are, a person will find something about themselves that they feel isn't right and makes them feel insecure. We all have to work with what God gave us the best way we know how.

HorrorChix89

I am sorry that some people have been negative on the threads. I find that happens alot, plus there is lots of bad advice. Generally I keep away from the forums for that general reason. But the diary is a wonderful tool. And once you find some friends who have similar weightloss goals, its a nice boost to get some positive comments when you've done something well.

But the bottom line is this.....if losing weight was easy, there wouldn't be an obesity problem in many countries.
If it were easy, we'd all be slim and gorgeous.

All I can say is if you find what you are doing isn't working, then you've got to change it up. Talk to your doctor about what is the best plan for you in order to reach your specific goals. Taking advice from strangers online isn't always helpful -though they do usually mean well.

Also, look for ways to take more control of your life and your health. You said you can't control how and when you eat, maybe you need to re-examine your daily schedule and get creative - like carrying a healthy snack in your purse or car to help you through, pack a lunch or dinner, etc.

You also have dismissed lots of options for exercise, but maybe do some research to figure out what will work for you before you give up.

Whatever you decide, I wish you the best on your journey...

I second this comment, lady.

The forums can be really hostile sometimes, unfortunately. Build a nice group of MFP friends and lean on them for support, advice, and just a shoulder to cry on when you need to. This IS a frustrating undertaking, but don't give up. The biggest factor is to remember to be kind and forgiving to yourself.

Friend me if you like - you're not alone. :flowerforyou:

Thanks Clew I'm starting to feel better, I'm just having a bad day. It happens, I'm human (at least I think I am).

I just sent you a friend's request, it's great to know I'm not alone

susandondo

Read your posting and it broke my heart. It's a tough road, this losing weight thing. Boards are about sharing and speaking our minds. However, when in a fragile state, it might be best to make a few select MFP friends, people you feel a connection with and communicate with them regularly. Once you're in a better place, go on back to the boards! There's some great folks out there who have inspiring stories and lots of good stuff to share.

We are all deserving and worthy of happiness and I wish you success in whatever you decide to do.