When your heart is breaking...

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athearenee
athearenee Posts: 110
in Motivation and Support
...how do you stay mentally tough?
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  • andiechick
    andiechick Posts: 916 Member
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    You've got to tell yourself you will make it through and you'll come out the other side a much stronger person xx
  • athearenee
    athearenee Posts: 110
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    You've got to tell yourself you will make it through and you'll come out the other side a much stronger person xx
    I'm doing this for me...I'm just terrified to get sidetracked by a broken heart
  • annabellj
    annabellj Posts: 1,337 Member
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    it is so hard when you are going through it. been there. but it takes time, that is pretty much all that helps. distance yourself if possible, keep busy, make your new health goals your number one priority, make it your hobby! you will get through this!
  • 226Muriel
    226Muriel Posts: 137 Member
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    Nice question:::::::Which deserves an answer.

    As I am a food addict/emotinal eater, I have struggled for so many years while destroying my health....

    Now, I am in recovery, one day at a time, at peace with myself and life as it happens....since 3/22/11....That's when I joined Overeater Anonymous.

    :flowerforyou:
  • Pookylou
    Pookylou Posts: 988 Member
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    You need to allow yourself to break down a bit, before pulling yourself back up. It is bloody hard though, last time my heart was broken I struggled to eat (first time ever!), but my best friend kept an eye on me. Each day will get better, a cliche I know but true
  • LemonDiva
    LemonDiva Posts: 61
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    I believe there is a time and tide to the sorrow, seek the wisdom, the lesson... and I pray. I also cry accepting I am human and these things are part of life... my heart expands with wonders so it must also break with sorrow...

    When I have had cause to ask, ' Why Me?' I must answer 'Why Not Me?'
    There are others who struggle with worse, much worse than I in my relative comfort... and I determine to make the best of the situation no matter what.

    I hope your heart isn't breaking althearenee pm me if you need to...
    Blessings De
  • Starla_
    Starla_ Posts: 349
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    cry, scream, break things, yell :)

    Rather than bottle it, let some of it go. Dont break anything you want to keep or which is expensive to replace though, and if you have close neighbours you might want to smother the yelling or screaming with a pillow.

    Unburden yourself a little and things will feel easier to bear.

    Also having a friend you can vent to is all kinds of awesome in these situations :)
  • premiumchilenita
    premiumchilenita Posts: 600 Member
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    Let it fuel your journey. It motivated me to want to finally do something for myself and I really enjoyed exercising and eating properly because with all the chaos around me, I had something beautiful that I was doing for me. Makes you really proud of yourself especially as you start to reach your mini goals. While your reaching your physical goals you're also reaching your emotional goals

    AND Exercising gives you natural "feel good" hormones, so bring on the feel good!!:drinker:
  • Jeneba
    Jeneba Posts: 699 Member
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    As I have gotten older (yes - this is what 55 looks like & I don't photograph particularly well) I hav found that it gets easier and easier to "compartmentalize" and recognize that there are other people in my life who really depend on me to "show up," give it all I've got, and "be there" for them. It helps me to realize that there are many kinds of Love and that even if I cannot sustain a relationship with "him," I still have a lot to give the other people in my life, the people who would never DREAM of hurting me. I am so sorry you are going through this! As you can probably tell, I am right there with you....:flowerforyou:
  • athearenee
    athearenee Posts: 110
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    it is so hard when you are going through it. been there. but it takes time, that is pretty much all that helps. distance yourself if possible, keep busy, make your new health goals your number one priority, make it your hobby! you will get through this!
    doing exactly that is what is keeping me alive at the moment...
  • Florawanda
    Florawanda Posts: 283 Member
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    De has said it beautifully - looking back on the times I felt I was being torn apart, there was always later another door opening, which led me along a different track. And, with hindsight, it was a good thing it happened. I know now I would never have been happy with X or Y - and the chance that led me to meet Michael just 44 years ago has given me great fulfilment, as well as 4 super children. God moves in mysterious ways, and while at this moment it might seem that you are abandoned, in years to come it will look different.
    So grieve for what is past, value the good times you had, and, when you are ready, move forward to the different joys yet to come!
  • athearenee
    athearenee Posts: 110
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    Let it fuel your journey. It motivated me to want to finally do something for myself and I really enjoyed exercising and eating properly because with all the chaos around me, I had something beautiful that I was doing for me. Makes you really proud of yourself especially as you start to reach your mini goals. While your reaching your physical goals you're also reaching your emotional goals

    AND Exercising gives you natural "feel good" hormones, so bring on the feel good!!:drinker:
    Part of why I started this was to distract myself from feeling pain...
    I decided to change what I had the power to change....

    So 1 month in...20 lbs lighter....heart still heavy....
  • SetecAstronomy
    SetecAstronomy Posts: 470 Member
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    ...how do you stay mentally tough?
    I really wish I had the answer for this one.
  • catic
    catic Posts: 156
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    I started running. The more emotion I felt the faster I ran.
  • ChelSleeve
    ChelSleeve Posts: 144 Member
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    Get a punching bag or find a place that has one.. heartbreak has underlaying anger.. take it all out on the bag.. that way you get it out and get in a work out!
  • FTIM2015
    FTIM2015 Posts: 460 Member
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    I wish I wasn't having to be :( I'd forgotten how manipulative and vindictive some women can be when money is involved, well the erson involved has money and they want a cushy life and will do anything to get it.
  • ReneeOfTheFae
    ReneeOfTheFae Posts: 117
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    When I broke it off with a guy I was seeing for three years (because it wasn't going anywhere, and he wasn't great for me), I let myself get over it. For so many break ups before that, I would mope around and break down everytime I heard or saw something that would remind me of a guy. But this time, it was different. By letting yourself get over him, you bounce back faster and feel so much better almost immediately. Focus on the things in your life that are good for you and make you happy. This will pass and you'll wake up one day and think, "Gee! I nearly forgot about what-his-name!"
    Good luck, Lady!
  • LilMizCharlie
    LilMizCharlie Posts: 5
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    Well this isn't always the samething, but I suffer from SPTSD, and with that comes deep depression which can make me emotionally crushed sometimes and small things can leave me broken hearted....I force myself these days to do the opposite of how I feel whether I like it or not, for the sake of staying alive and on to it...Another thing I have learnt to do is effectively fill up my 'love' tank, probably sounds stupid I know, but it certainly helps me stay on top of things....goodluck!
  • athearenee
    athearenee Posts: 110
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    I believe there is a time and tide to the sorrow, seek the wisdom, the lesson... and I pray. I also cry accepting I am human and these things are part of life... my heart expands with wonders so it must also break with sorrow...

    When I have had cause to ask, ' Why Me?' I must answer 'Why Not Me?'
    There are others who struggle with worse, much worse than I in my relative comfort... and I determine to make the best of the situation no matter what.

    I hope your heart isn't breaking althearenee pm me if you need to...
    Blessings De
    :heart:
  • athearenee
    athearenee Posts: 110
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    Get a punching bag or find a place that has one.. heartbreak has underlaying anger.. take it all out on the bag.. that way you get it out and get in a work out!
    Love It!
    I have one in the garage....I'm gonna go hit it...I'll be back...

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