When your heart is breaking...

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24

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  • athearenee
    athearenee Posts: 110
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    I wish I wasn't having to be :( I'd forgotten how manipulative and vindictive some women can be when money is involved, well the erson involved has money and they want a cushy life and will do anything to get it.
    What a gyp!!
    I have family that put $$ before love....awful
  • lulalee
    lulalee Posts: 16 Member
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    Give yourself permission to be heart broken and acknowledge that every day life changes in little subtle ways that allow a little more sunshine to break through. Taking charge of who you are and becomming the person you want to be will allow you to really love and appreciate yourself. You are amazing, look at what you are going through and you are still strong enough to make those life changes you are, how can you not be amazing. Walk out in the air, feel it fill your lungs and look around, really look, and see all wonderful little things that reaffirm who yo are and how great you are. Use all of your senses to take in the world around you and slowly allow yourself to start feeling the little miracles, that will graudually allow the smiles in your life again.
    Be safe in the knowledge we will all listen when you need.
  • Smuterella
    Smuterella Posts: 1,623 Member
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    I going through this now, it has only been a short relatioship but one I've invested a lot of my emotions in after 2 years of being single. Anyway, I'm finding the following things help:

    1) crying loudly
    2) exercising hard
    3) this website http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/

    x
  • athearenee
    athearenee Posts: 110
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    Give yourself permission to be heart broken and acknowledge that every day life changes in little subtle ways that allow a little more sunshine to break through. Taking charge of who you are and becomming the person you want to be will allow you to really love and appreciate yourself. You are amazing, look at what you are going through and you are still strong enough to make those life changes you are, how can you not be amazing. Walk out in the air, feel it fill your lungs and look around, really look, and see all wonderful little things that reaffirm who yo are and how great you are. Use all of your senses to take in the world around you and slowly allow yourself to start feeling the little miracles, that will graudually allow the smiles in your life again.
    Be safe in the knowledge we will all listen when you need.
    :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:
  • athearenee
    athearenee Posts: 110
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    I going through this now, it has only been a short relatioship but one I've invested a lot of my emotions in after 2 years of being single. Anyway, I'm finding the following things help:

    1) crying loudly
    2) exercising hard
    3) this website http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/

    x
    1) just had an involuntary meltdown...feeling better already
    2) more and more everyday...
    3) like it...trying to apply it

    Thanks Lady!:flowerforyou:
  • GG70
    GG70 Posts: 232 Member
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    it is so hard when you are going through it. been there. but it takes time, that is pretty much all that helps. distance yourself if possible, keep busy, make your new health goals your number one priority, make it your hobby! you will get through this!



    YES, I agree!!! SHE NAILED IT!

    I will add.. that you are NOT ALONE either!! Each of us has been in that painful place where you feel physical pain from the heartache,For me, I remember having to talk myself out of bed, taking a shower and just doing anything.. it was the worst pain. I also started working out .. Jogging was my thing at the time and that was the only time of day I felt centered. Over time, you will feel more balanced through healthy eating and exercise. ..and pray for strength too!!! When you come out of this place, you will be better and stronger than ever!!!! I know this!! Please feel free to friend me,,,I would love to help you through!!
  • porffor
    porffor Posts: 1,212 Member
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    New Hobby and fully imerse would be my way. if you need a good cry though sit down and let it out.. it's good for the soul just pick yourself up after and dust yourself off. If you've got close friends make sure you talk..
    Deal with the pain now to avoid more later ((hugs))
    As PP said we have all been there.. It does get easier.
  • Nonibug
    Nonibug Posts: 1,214 Member
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    Although it is hard, remember that NO ONE has control of your self-worth and your happiness BUT YOU. Don't let "him" have that power over you. Every day that you spend letting it drag you down instead turning it into positive for yourself--you let "him" win. Don't let "him" win, sweetie:flowerforyou: Use all those emotions that you are feeling to fuel yourself--walking, jogging, punching a bag, swimming, anything...all good for you and a good "release".

    Like others have said--we have all felt it and SURVIVED it at some point in our lives...

    Stay strong:flowerforyou: :drinker:
  • slay0r
    slay0r Posts: 669 Member
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    I started running. The more emotion I felt the faster I ran.

    That's what I do. I just run and run and run until I can't move anymore. Last time that was 4 hours later and I'd pulled about 5 muscles but I just carried on regardless. Nothing like a good run to get everything out then wash it away with a hot shower after :)
  • woou
    woou Posts: 668 Member
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    i didnt try to stay tough. i cried all i wanted. XD. you just have to choose to do the right thing for yourself anyway.
  • hepsi
    hepsi Posts: 27 Member
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    Looking back, I ate through my heart break...

    One day you will wake up and realise that you are going to be fine...until then chin up gal...
  • Buddhasmiracle
    Buddhasmiracle Posts: 925 Member
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    I don't know if I can contribute much more than what many of the posters have already said. Allow yourself tears and comfort yourself with the beauty around you -- a favorite friend, a bike ride, a silly movie, if you have nieces or nephews, young cousins -- give them your time -- and you will get so much in return. There is nothing like a child to mend a broken heart.
  • ldmendes
    ldmendes Posts: 16 Member
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    There are actual studies that prove that emotional pain follows the same pathways as physical pain. It hurts! It's so hard and everyone who has responded to you has been through it. Do what you need to do each and everyday like you always do, concentrating on your work or all the other things you were doing and put your energy into that. Be kind to yourself, it won't always feel this bad! I promise:flowerforyou:
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
    LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo Posts: 3,634 Member
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    bump because I'm broken hearted for now & I don't know what to do to stay strong & until now I feel bad about it :(
  • MaximalLife
    MaximalLife Posts: 2,447 Member
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    First, I buck up and set new goals.

    Second, I get real about the nature of the relationship, and resolve to just let it go while seeing if there are lessons to be learned.

    Third, I start to consider what other doors will open now that this one is closed. Nature abhors a vacuum.

    Forth, I set time aside to work through the grief and pain, then LET IT GO!

    And finally,
    13833350_8665.jpg
    I GET EVEN!
  • MrsNoir
    MrsNoir Posts: 236 Member
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    When you heart is breaking join a fitness club or some kind of fitness activity lesson where you can meet other people and have fun getting fit, and getting passionate about it with all your heart. Perhaps if you forget about your affairs and concentrate on exercise, the other matters of the heart get solved once you reach your goal :D
  • slay0r
    slay0r Posts: 669 Member
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    When you heart is breaking join a fitness club or some kind of fitness activity lesson where you can meet other people and have fun getting fit, and getting passionate about it with all your heart. Perhaps if you forget about your affairs and concentrate on exercise, the other matters of the heart get solved once you reach your goal :D

    That's a good idea, some classes with some other people would be a nice little thing to do, meet some new people and get going in that sense. Will help with your goals and your heartbreak! Could incorporate the running and join a running club or something?
  • suziblues2000
    suziblues2000 Posts: 515 Member
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    "how do you stay mentally tough?"

    Sometimes you can't. Just accept your feelings....accept them and let them teach you whatever it is you need to be taught. Does that make sense?

    Remember: you don't always need to be 'mentally tough' !
  • daisydieter
    daisydieter Posts: 118
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    Not sure if anyone else said this... but decide your heart deserves to heal quickly. Treat yourself the way you'd treat a dear friend, sister or daughter.

    Also, choose to see eating well and exercising is helping you to heal. You are properly nourishing yourself with healthy food to heal. The exercise is a great way to get out the angst/hurt... imagine every drop of sweat is a little bit of that hurt melting away.

    Let the pain motivate you for positive change for you. Make that be the purpose of you having to go through with the hurt. It is what motivated you to make some solid changes for a happier life.
  • klmnumbers
    klmnumbers Posts: 213 Member
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    ...how do you stay mentally tough?

    Gurl, I need this answer, too. Yesterday was rough for me (emotionally), and I felt it immediately in my food choices. I really had to force dinner upon myself and a snack to make my calorie goal. Not sure today will be any better.

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