Should i say something??!!

judith3

My uncle posted on his facebook status that he loves his kids and hopes to one day see them again and that he knows he made mistakes but that he has never forgotten about them. And his son replied to his post and said we have a dad so just worry about your other kids kus you dont have any other children. Frankly this pisses me off my uncle was never bad to him or his two other siblings and yes he left because he got deported not like he just abandoned them. His mother on the other hand has filled their heads with so much bull**** over the years that they hate him. But regardless what he thinks the truth is its just unacceptable for him to say something like that to his father on facebook. I mean if you hate him so freaking much and you say you arent a part of his family then why is it that your friends with him on facebook as well as with all your aunts and uncles and cousins

MaximalLife

My uncle posted on his facebook status that he loves his kids and hopes to one day see them again and that he knows he made mistakes but that he has never forgotten about them. And his son replied to his post and said we have a dad so just worry about your other kids kus you dont have any other children. Frankly this pisses me off my uncle was never bad to him or his two other siblings and yes he left because he got deported not like he just abandoned them. His mother on the other hand has filled their heads with so much bull**** over the years that they hate him. But regardless what he thinks the truth is its just unacceptable for him to say something like that to his father on facebook. I mean if you hate him so freaking much and you say you arent a part of his family then why is it that your friends with him on facebook as well as with all your aunts and uncles and cousins

Butt OUT, and let the drama play out without your involvement.
They'll work it out if both parties are really sincere. If not, then NOTHING you do will help.
Just keep your nose out.

raisingbabyk

It's not your place to say anything. That's something he needs to talk to his son about and they are the only two people that should have a say in their relationship. If anything, you butting in saying his feelings are wrong will probably only push the son away more and make things worse.:ohwell:

countrydarling1

iT WOULD BE HARD FOR ME To keep my mouth shut. Id have to say something, but im can be an "In your face person" If i see someone in the wrong, i have to point out both sides.

bratius

Nope not your place to say anything

AmberJslimsAWAY

It's not your place

coyoteo

No, you should not say anything.

judith3

I know its not my place but i know things that neither party knows and i kinda just feel like if they both knew these things they could very well possibly work things out

joanneonline

If his children seek your advice, then give it (if you can do so without judging their mom). Otherwise, it is not your place.

MissFit0101

My first thought was that you should probably mind your own business, but after thinking about it a little more... Your uncle is family so in a way, it IS your business... as well as anything said on the INTERNET, is everyone's business who has access to it.. With that said, if you want to say something, might I suggest you not being rude about it, but rather offering the kid another view on the true story of why your uncle wasn't around?

PeaceLoveVeggies

Everyone here is saying it's not your place, but frankly, I'm not the type to keep my mouth shut. I would say something regardless of whether or not it's not my problem or drama.

SandyChampWins

It is what it is...I would leave it alone!

MaryB2

I would probably say something. If the son didn't want other people to get involved he shouldn't have written something so ugly for everyone to see.

Apazman

Its sounds more like you are trying to find people who agree with what you already decided to do rather than actually recieve input. You're just trying to rationalize a poor decision.
Just saying!

tdbernrd

Personally, I wouldn't say anything. The son probably needs to have a frank discussion with his father. In person is always better than on the web. There may be questions that he has which haven't been answered. The fact that he has made the connection on FB with his father and his father's side of the family shows that he wants to be included. He's just hurt for whatever reason. I feel like he needs to hear his father's side of things and keep an open heart. I do agree that FB isn't the place to air grievances, but some people post anything on it.

ironanimal

Facebook Drama = not worth the stress

minadeathclutch

**** yeah say something. if its your family and you feel strongly about it.. say whats on your mind. FREEDOM OF SPEECH. **** being passive aggressive and letting **** slide... say it !

ChrisStoney

sometimes facebook is almost as good as Dr Phil. What do you have to lose? if you have no relationship with the kids, then you will only be supporting your Uncle who you do have a relationship with...

Why are they facebook friends?

fitfocusedfamily

I agree with the others, it isn't your place to say anything. I, too, do not have a good relationship with my mother. There are too numerous reasons that only my siblings & myself know about that we don't want aired to the public. We don't respond when our mother posts such things. My mother's best friend (like an aunt to me) tried to chew me out over FB message one day because I rarely speak to my mother. Evidently, my mother had fed her some sob story. As much as I didn't want to relive the past, I had to set her straight on a lot of things she never knew about my mother, including how my mother takes advantage of those around her, said friend included. I was furious with this woman for having stuck her nose where it didn't belong. You will be doing yourself & your cousin & uncle a favor by staying out of it.

Marley112586

I'm thinking that the son is not that old or hasn't matured for posting something like that publicly. They will work it out for themselves once BOTH of them are ready to. You getting in the middle of it isnt going to do anything but cause more problems. When the son is ready he will ask his father what happened.

sf08003

I think you already know the answer...

onedayillbamilf

Every once in a while I'm a "tell it like it is" person. In this case, I would set my fear of speaking up ever aside and send the boy a private message and try to politely and rationaly explain the truths of the situation that he might not know about. He can either accept it or not, whatever route he chooses is not yours to worry about.

MaryB2

Its sounds more like you are trying to find people who agree with what you already decided to do rather than actually recieve input. You're just trying to rationalize a poor decision.
Just saying!

Why would she need people to agree if she had already decided what to do? I don't think it is a poor decision but I also don't get that she has already made up her mind what to do. I don't understand why some people act like only sertain questions are ok to ask on here.

77tes

No, no, no ... you will not fix anything, and all the anger will be turned on you.

Alicia_Monique

I know it's not your place to say anything, but I would call their mother up and give her a piece of my mind. I'm nosy, though, could just be me.

judith3

Its sounds more like you are trying to find people who agree with what you already decided to do rather than actually recieve input. You're just trying to rationalize a poor decision.
Just saying!

You're wrong i wasnt trying to find anyone to agree with me i have not said anything to him although i honestly fell like i should.
A) because he wrote it in english and my uncle only speaks spanish
because he wrote it in a public place where everyone can see it and my uncle doesnt have regular access to the internet so it will probably sit there for a long time before he actually sees it.
and C) I merely wanted to know what someone else would do in the situation

MaryB2

I agree with the others, it isn't your place to say anything. I, too, do not have a good relationship with my mother. There are too numerous reasons that only my siblings & myself know about that we don't want aired to the public. We don't respond when our mother posts such things. My mother's best friend (like an aunt to me) tried to chew me out over FB message one day because I rarely speak to my mother. Evidently, my mother had fed her some sob story. As much as I didn't want to relive the past, I had to set her straight on a lot of things she never knew about my mother, including how my mother takes advantage of those around her, said friend included. I was furious with this woman for having stuck her nose where it didn't belong. You will be doing yourself & your cousin & uncle a favor by staying out of it.

The difference I see here is that you say y'all don't reply when your mother posts things like that. By him posting something publicly that puts someone down he is inviting public responses.

Jennloella

family is hard. He obviously won't listen to his Dad, would he listen to you? It depends how close you are to them. I recently brought my mother and her little brother back together after 16 years of not talking and I did it by putting my nose where it didn't belong. Guess what? my uncle died suddenly of a heart attack and had I not gotten them back in touch my Mother would have never known, much less made amends with him before his death. She was even able to attend his funeral and see his children. Family is work.

Apazman

Its sounds more like you are trying to find people who agree with what you already decided to do rather than actually recieve input. You're just trying to rationalize a poor decision.
Just saying!

Why would she need people to agree if she had already decided what to do? I don't think it is a poor decision but I also don't get that she has already made up her mind what to do. I don't understand why some people act like only sertain questions are ok to ask on here.

I am sorry you are not familar with the concept of trying to rationalize decisions based on emotions.

Here's an article to get you started:
http://www.burg.com/2010/03/rationalize-rational-lies…it’s-a-“human-thing”/

OfficerFuzzy

I think that was a bit wrong of your uncle.

Coming from a kid's point of a view, what I would be wondering is if he really meant it why wouldn't he call, write or just simply private message it?

I don't know the whole situation, and maybe your cousin doesn't either.
And no matter what the reason someone leaves there kids. (Like, your uncles completely rational one) it always feels like abandonment to a kid.

I think you should say something, that's the kind of family I come from, but if you do, understand both sides of the problem.

MaryB2

Its sounds more like you are trying to find people who agree with what you already decided to do rather than actually recieve input. You're just trying to rationalize a poor decision.
Just saying!

Why would she need people to agree if she had already decided what to do? I don't think it is a poor decision but I also don't get that she has already made up her mind what to do. I don't understand why some people act like only sertain questions are ok to ask on here.

I am sorry you are not familar with the concept of trying to rationalize decisions based on emotions.

Here's an article to get you started:
http://www.burg.com/2010/03/rationalize-rational-lies…it’s-a-“human-thing”/

I'm sorry you're not capable of understanding what you read. That article says nothing about people trying to get others to justify a decision made before doing it. It says that majority of decisions people make are based on emotions and they LATER try to justify those decisions with logic. If she was doing that she would have said something to her cousin and then tried to justify to everyone why she did it. Like she already pointed out, she was wondering what others in the same situation would do and she got a variety answers and reasons. She also got some ignorant responses that sound like they are coming from someone that enjoys being an @$$ to people.