Hubby trying to lead me astray

13

Replies

  • jenlarz
    jenlarz Posts: 813 Member
    Go and find some healthy good recipes. I can get my husband and kids to eat most of them. I do have to add more veggies to mine. There are plenty out there and often taste better with good seasoning than they do with all the extra fat.
  • binariiangel
    binariiangel Posts: 146 Member
    I'm the only one in my house of 5 that is trying to eat healthy & lose weight. But I do all of the major cooking/cleaning etc. so I have decided that if they do not like what I am making/how I am making it. There is sandwich stuff, frozen meals, chef boyardee, lol. I hate to be like that, but at the same time I do so much around here (and I assume since most men don't do a lot of house work, you do as well), that I cannot cook 2 or 3 different meals. Hope this helps!
  • And keep one thing in mind....HE cannot sabotage you. YOU have control over what goes into your mouth. Yes we ALL know that is easier said than done, but don't blame anyone else.
  • I understand that completely! My goal is 60 lbs as well. Feel free to add me.
  • I have that same problem because my hubby does most of the cooking.
  • spinqueen72
    spinqueen72 Posts: 406 Member
    Hi, I am new to MFP - and looking for support to help me reach my 60lb goal. I seem to do really well during the day, but then find it difficult in the evening when my hubby wants to eat unhealthy food!

    Anyone any advice/ ideas for healthy alternatives so that I dont have to cook 2 meals?!

    :wink:

    Here's what I did: I made a menu...then did my grocery shopping. I asked my family (husband mostly) if they wanted anything else. When they wanted shells-n-cheese & pigs in a blanket..I ate my chicken breast & baked sweet potato. When they wanted spaghetti..I used organic sauce (no added sugar), whole wheat noodles, and extra lean meat!
    Don't give them a choice if you don't have to. Sit down with them and let them know your goals, and why you are doing this. Your husband may appreciate the fact that you are trying to make yourself look & feel better..not only for you..but for him as well!
    If he wants his "girlfriend" back (the girl you were before the weight)...he'll understand, and be more willing to accept the changes you are making in your diet! I know mine did!!
  • HollyAus
    HollyAus Posts: 241 Member
    I am genuinely shocked that so many women seem to cook for their husbands on a daily basis, honestly - do they never cook or do you not cook together? I've always cooked with my partners, it was a bonding, romantic sort of thing. Though to be fair I am the single one on this thread - perhaps I need to get my apron on!

    Yes I cook EVERY meal for my husband! And I enjoy it. He works, I don't. Is it fair for me to ask him to come home and cook his own meal when I have been home all day? I don't think so. And I eat whatever he eats. No way am I cooking two meals (or more, for the kids) I try to make things he likes, and make it healthy so it works for my whole family
  • Gigglles
    Gigglles Posts: 24 Member
    I know exactly how you feel... My hubby is the same way. And when I try to talk to him about it he gets defensive... I just try and eat a smaller portion and try to get him to eat earlier!
  • PaleoPath4Lyfe
    PaleoPath4Lyfe Posts: 3,161 Member
    I am genuinely shocked that so many women seem to cook for their husbands on a daily basis, honestly - do they never cook or do you not cook together? I've always cooked with my partners, it was a bonding, romantic sort of thing. Though to be fair I am the single one on this thread - perhaps I need to get my apron on!

    I do the cooking during the week (breakfast and supper) and Sunday evening dinner ..........My husband cooks breakfast on Saturday and Sunday and then he also works supper on Saturday nights.
  • PaleoPath4Lyfe
    PaleoPath4Lyfe Posts: 3,161 Member
    I love the lingerie part!!! That will work on any husband. Better yet, let him go with you to pick it out, it will get him involved and you'll be assured that it will be in the front of his mind for the next months.. ..you can't catch a bear with vegetables.....:love:

    cook your food when its your turn... and have a spare tucked away for when he does his stuff... freeze leftovers or give it to the dog... I suggest making yours as yummy as you can seduce him x x x

    or buy some sexy lingerie and tell him the sooner he gets with the program the sooner you will wear it x x x

    To me, this is playing games and I am not one to play games with my spouse. Bribery and such has no place in a marriage.

    Be straight forward and honest.
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
    So many people are unwilling to make more than one meal at a time. It's really not that hard. Different meals doesn't mean it has to be something completely different. Just use the same base stuff for everything with additions to make it more pleasing to whoever is eating it (hint: bacon and cheese make EVERYTHING better)

    What if it's not a health thing but a difference in diet? I eat a lot less grains and fats than my fiancee but have probably 600 more calories a day that I can eat than she can. I also like my food much spicier than she does. Since I'm the one cooking does that mean she just shouldn't be able to eat or have to make her own dinner when I'm using the kitchen to make my chow? Of course not. I mean we of course try to make stuff with similar ingredients. If I'm having grilled chicken with steamed veggies I'll cut her smaller pieces of chicken, make a small serving of brown rice for her, and take her chicken out before I nuke mine with habanero sauce.

    I had to make two separate chilis this past weekend for our lunches, one with the stuff I could eat and one with the stuff she could eat. It took a long time because we only had one slow cooker, but the actual prep time was only like an extra 20 minutes.
  • HollyAus
    HollyAus Posts: 241 Member
    I love the lingerie part!!! That will work on any husband. Better yet, let him go with you to pick it out, it will get him involved and you'll be assured that it will be in the front of his mind for the next months.. ..you can't catch a bear with vegetables.....:love:

    cook your food when its your turn... and have a spare tucked away for when he does his stuff... freeze leftovers or give it to the dog... I suggest making yours as yummy as you can seduce him x x x

    or buy some sexy lingerie and tell him the sooner he gets with the program the sooner you will wear it x x x

    To me, this is playing games and I am not one to play games with my spouse. Bribery and such has no place in a marriage.

    Be straight forward and honest.

    I have to agree with not playing games, But I like the idea of getting him involved. The lingerie could be fun too. What I don't like about it is doing it to "trick" him, or bribe, whatever. It can be a way for him to help motivate you (and give him some motivation for motivating you lol)
  • porcupinegirl32
    porcupinegirl32 Posts: 16 Member
    haha, in my house you get what I cook or you cook for yourself!
  • jenluvsushi
    jenluvsushi Posts: 933 Member
    My hubby is the same way...he can eat at In and Out three times a day and actually lose weight....NOT Fair! Feel free to add me :)
  • fearlessbetz
    fearlessbetz Posts: 97 Member
    It's hard having my husband's favorite foods in the house, oreos, burritos, mini-cheeseburgers. I can't control what he does though. We make one dinner, and he just gets more of it, and I have to keep my mitts off his cookies.
  • I don't think you should have to bribe him to eat the food you cook. Healthy options don't have to be bland or undesirable. Try making healthy foods that seem "bad" - like this dish: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/george-stella/mock-garlic-mashed-potatoes-recipe/index.html. Everybody loves mashed potatoes. I have also found a lot of success making recipes from this cookbook: http://www.amazon.com/Anyone-Can-Cook-Step-Step/dp/0696232936. Most of the recipes are easy to follow and healthy, many giving you the opportunity to substitute your favorite ingredients with step by step substitution instructions.

    Hope this helps!
  • kbw414
    kbw414 Posts: 194
    We don't buy any unhealthy food, so it's not there to tempt me. My husband snacks to get his extra calories but we have a big house and he's kind enough to me to do his snacking while I'm working out and can't see him. I'm sure your husband loves and respects you too--it sounds like you just need to come to a compromise.
  • ansonrinesmith
    ansonrinesmith Posts: 741 Member
    I think I saw this said, but unless he cooks, he will eat what you cook.
  • Keep up with your healthy eating and Im sure he will see your good results and try it your way!!! My husband of 38 years loves his chicken with skin so when I make chicken I cook his with skin and mine without in separate pans. Another is he loves his grilled hamburgers and hot dogs on the grill so I cook him his Beef hamburger and Ballpark hot dogs and I grill for me a portabella burger and a 97% fat free all beef hebrew national hot dog... Now my husband loves Portabella Burgers and 97% fat free hot dogs... So dont give up you can adjust without too much work!!!!
  • getfitdiva
    getfitdiva Posts: 1,148 Member
    Make one meal if he don't like it then he can make his own unhealthy meal. He will either be too lazy to cook and eat your healthy food or go out and get unhealthy food. Stay on track it's your journey!
  • dlyeates
    dlyeates Posts: 875 Member
    PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT TRY TO FEED YOUR HUBBY GROUND TURKEY!!! Nothing screams "diet food" worse than ground turkey. But look at the nutritional stats for ground turkey vs 90/10 ground beef, or even 85/15! Turkey has a little more protein, but that's it. IMO, The only thing you get for switching to ground turkey is some sort of weird self flagellation that you're sacrificing something (taste and flavor!)to lose weight.

    Does hubby need to loose a few pounds also? If so, hubby needs to get on the program, but he will still need more calories than you.
    He doesn't have to live on carrot sticks,apple slices, and celery while you diet. A lot of foods are healthy you can both eat. You can both pretty much eat lean meats and non-starchy vegetables. Add a filling carb (potatoes,yams, beans or rice) to his meal and you can both skip the bread. You could put him on a healthy eating plan and him not actually realize it.

    Don't fall for the "no-eating at night rule" many dieters adhere to as some sort of law of the diet universe. Save the bulk of your calories for dinner together. You can eat like a bird during the day and more of a regular meal at night together. As long as you are in a daily negative caloric state you will loose weight. I lost a buttload of weight last year, and I eat more calories between 6pm and bedtime than any other part of the day.

    Funny to me because as much of a meat and potato guy that my hubby is he LOVES ground turkey in certain meals!!! I make tacos and tostadas with ground turkey and meatloaf with ground turkey. I bought a pre-made meatloaf one time because it was on sale and within my calories that was made with beef or pork or something that WASN'T ground turkey and when I asked my hubby how it was he said "it's no Turkey Quinoa Meatloaf". We laugh all the time that I MAKE him eat my "diet" food because he loves everything I make.

    Of course, my "diet" food includes marinated pork roasts, marinated pork chops, chicken tacos, turkey tostadas, Southwest Chicken casserole (thank you Philadelphia Cooking Creme), BBQ Ribs in the crockpot, turkey meatball subs, potatoes, veggies, and eating out. So he loves what I'm doing, it's healthier for his heart and he eats awesome food......I'm a pretty good cook if I do say so myself!!!!
  • OMG this sounds like we are married to the same man. My first day of my healthy life style change he wanted to go out and eat. But i stayed strong. My advice to you and one that I take as well for myself, if this is what you want and if you want it bad enough no one can control it except for you. So Stay strong, and stay focus, becasue what ever changes you make to your food intake will make a difference. And if he dont want to eat what you want oh well, sooner or later he will eat what you eat, or he will find for for himself.
  • natalie412
    natalie412 Posts: 1,039 Member
    I am genuinely shocked that so many women seem to cook for their husbands on a daily basis, honestly - do they never cook or do you not cook together? I've always cooked with my partners, it was a bonding, romantic sort of thing. Though to be fair I am the single one on this thread - perhaps I need to get my apron on!

    My husband doesn't really like to cook - although he is capable (somewhat, haha), but I LOVE to cook, so not a problem. I even do the grilling! He's a great cleaner-upper though...

    As far as the cooking goes, as long as there is plenty of meat, he is happy. When I make mashed potatoes, for instance, I just have half a cup, and I also make things lighter, and have smaller portions myself. He does actually like it when I cook a little healthier or in smaller quantities - I just make sure everything has lots of flavor!
  • Buddhasmiracle
    Buddhasmiracle Posts: 925 Member
    I am genuinely shocked that so many women seem to cook for their husbands on a daily basis, honestly - do they never cook or do you not cook together? I've always cooked with my partners, it was a bonding, romantic sort of thing. Though to be fair I am the single one on this thread - perhaps I need to get my apron on!


    I do most of the cooking; and he eats whatever I prepare; and except for a few dishes, says "nom, nom, nom." I do the menu planning and shopping. He cleans up afterwards, and he does the housecleaning -- dusting, furniture polishing, and BATHROOMs. And he does a great job. He also does all the packing (military style) when we travel. I do the laundry, and fold; but he puts his own stuff away. He irons my stuff and his if it needs it. Generally he picks up after himself, although with his recent acquisition (1976 TR6) I've been finding car parts around the house -- including the kitchen table, bathroom, and the top of his dresser. I'm the Budget and Finance Manager., and take out the trash. I make drs and haircut appts for both of us.

    I appreciate what you say about prepping a meal together. We bond when we remodel our living space -- spackling, ripping out bathrooms and kitchens, painting.
  • I wish I did. I have the same problem. It takes a lot of discipline not to eat the same things as your husband. And, husbands sometimes are not the best support. I really have to separate meals for my entire family because I have growing children too.
    Just try to make your meal before their meal so that you are not tempted:)
  • imdelishus
    imdelishus Posts: 9 Member
    It's always hardest to eat healthier when your partner doesn't need to lose weight. The 2 meal thing... Usually I make enough dinner to take leftovers for lunch. I kinda just do that all week so I don't have to think about it. Don't know if that helps or not. But don't stop moving forward!
  • Yvesdiva
    Yvesdiva Posts: 6 Member
    I understand what you mean. Lol. I never thought I'd be in the kitchen alone, either, but now that we have kids, careers, after school activities, it's just easier if we alternate. So, Sun, Tues, Thurs he cooks, Mon, Wed, Fri, I cook. And now that he's on My fitnesspal, it's much easier to eat healthy all week. But, you got to train them. They are very trainable, I've found.
  • Perhaps....lol.
  • Legs_McGee
    Legs_McGee Posts: 845 Member
    I am genuinely shocked that so many women seem to cook for their husbands on a daily basis, honestly - do they never cook or do you not cook together? I've always cooked with my partners, it was a bonding, romantic sort of thing. Though to be fair I am the single one on this thread - perhaps I need to get my apron on!

    My husband cooks his own meals. If I want what he's making that's great; if not, I prepare my own meal. I can't talk him into wearing an apron though.
  • GigiBee824
    GigiBee824 Posts: 32 Member
    I won't cook two meals, but I do give consideration to what my boyfriend enjoys, just as I take what I enjoy into account when planning for dinner. I do most of the cooking, but he does most of the dishes so I'm cool with that. He's not a vegetable person unless the veggie is slathered in cheese. So I will eat steamed broccoli with a bit of pepper on it, and he will eat steamed broccoli with cheez whiz on it. No biggie. He'll eat my vegetable experiments like the good sport he is, and he'll even eat it again if he liked it the first time. If he hates it, then I'll probably try another recipe and leave that one for when he's out of town. A good relationship is all about compromise.
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