Best Chuck Norris Fact

tomomatic
tomomatic Posts: 1,794 Member
edited November 11 in Chit-Chat
The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.
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Replies

  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
    Chuck Norris can leave a message BEFORE the beep!
  • agthorn
    agthorn Posts: 1,844 Member
    Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
  • agthorn
    agthorn Posts: 1,844 Member
    Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Unfortunately, Chuck Norris never cries.
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
    Chuck Norris ate out of the Superbowl!
  • ScottyNoHotty
    ScottyNoHotty Posts: 1,957 Member
    The Greeks created the Olympics for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris created the Special Olympics for the rest of us.
  • richied26
    richied26 Posts: 948 Member
    Chuck Norris can tell its not butter
  • CMmrsfloyd
    CMmrsfloyd Posts: 2,380 Member
    Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
  • Trovan
    Trovan Posts: 133 Member
    Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
  • mayaeberhard
    mayaeberhard Posts: 27
    Superman wears Chuck Norris underpants
  • adrian_indy
    adrian_indy Posts: 1,444 Member
    Chuck Norris uses live rattle snakes as a condom.
  • MrCaleb
    MrCaleb Posts: 26
    Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups, he pushes the earth down.

    Chuck Norris counted to Infinity...twice.
  • _SusieQ_
    _SusieQ_ Posts: 2,964 Member
    The boogey man checks his closet at night for Chuck Norris.
  • ScottyNoHotty
    ScottyNoHotty Posts: 1,957 Member
    Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afraid to move.
  • TheMerryPup
    TheMerryPup Posts: 186 Member
    Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
    Chuck Norris can walk into a revolving door behind you and come out in front of you.
  • aprilgicker
    aprilgicker Posts: 395 Member
    All options are customer service for Chuck Norris
  • killagb
    killagb Posts: 3,280 Member
    This is so 2005.
  • BlackRangerX
    BlackRangerX Posts: 133 Member
    chuck norris can chew water!!
  • MrCaleb
    MrCaleb Posts: 26
    There isn't a chin under Chuck Norris' beard, it's an extra fist.
  • tiffiemariee
    tiffiemariee Posts: 19 Member
    Chuck Norris got pulled over once by a policeman for speeding. Chuck gave him a warning.
  • TeutonicKnight
    TeutonicKnight Posts: 367 Member
    Chuck Norris can lift Thor's Hammer with his beard.
  • princeza9
    princeza9 Posts: 337 Member
    Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
  • taso42
    taso42 Posts: 8,980 Member
    If every day where like today, in 5 weeks, Chuck Norris would still bodyslam you with telekinesis.
  • steve915
    steve915 Posts: 21 Member
    chuck norris uses pepper spray to season his steaks
  • princeza9
    princeza9 Posts: 337 Member
    Chuck Norris counted to Infinity...twice.

    I've seen that one for Rory Williams as well. :) Telling how much of a nerd I am?
  • normh545
    normh545 Posts: 81 Member
    sick of this chuck norris **** on every site i go on
  • conidiring
    conidiring Posts: 230 Member
    Chuck Norris doesn't mow the lawn, he dares the grass to grow.
  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
    They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take *kitten* from anybody.

    Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke....that truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
  • tiffiemariee
    tiffiemariee Posts: 19 Member
    Chuck Norris can hear sign language and speak braille.
  • foramanwhohashope
    foramanwhohashope Posts: 90 Member
    Chuck Norris doesn't ranger roll his Patrol Cap, he ranger roles his ACH.

    Chuck Norris's DNA isn't a double helix.. it's barbed wire wrapped around it's self.
  • aprilgicker
    aprilgicker Posts: 395 Member
    If every day where like today, in 5 weeks, Chuck Norris would still bodyslam you with telekinesis.
    LMFAO
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