MFP Friends... how do you decide who they will be?

tataliciousd89

I accept pretty much every request and send out to those who amuse me on the message boards, but I wind up deleting people when they don't log in for prolonged periods of time or if their behavior is offensive to me. I'm very difficult to offend tho so that hasn't happened just yet.

allison_42

When I send friend requests I usually look for someone who is around my age, or who has the same weight loss goals, etc. I generally accept people when they add me but I will not be friends with someone who "hasn't filled out" any of their information or has no picture. It makes me not take them seriously.

galegetsthin

I have an octopus in a tank with one platform that says yes and one that says no. I send a small electric current through the water when I want an answer and if he tells me yes, you made the list!

felice03

I have an octopus in a tank with one platform that says yes and one that says no. I send a small electric current through the water when I want an answer and if he tells me yes, you made the list!

i love your octopus....

SofaKingRad

I decline most people because I'm a d*ck and people will just end up hating me anyways. But, I will accept some FRs.

MrsCon40

I don't accept friend requests from men. I don't accept friend requests without a message. I don't accept friend requests from people who type the message in all caps, because I don't want to read that in my newsfeed. I also don't accept an FR with a message like "u look cool." I don't want to friend collect, and I want to know that I'm going to be able to connect with anyone I accept. I'm pretty picky.

You know who else was picky


Haha:flowerforyou:

Um, thanks. :flip:

It's hard (for me anyway) to be a good friend to any more than 100 people.

I like to have friends who lift heavy, ride horses, or who have been with me for a long time already...

Flip?

Mcctin65

I very seldom request anyone but when I do it's typically because I've seen them so often on different forums that I've come to recognize them. Basically to me it's showing they are interested in the same issues or I just like their comments and feel I can learn from them also.

Articeluvsmemphis

Of all my friends I have only deleted 1, she made crazy posts all day long, could not take it.

I turned 1 person down by accident, stupid "smart phone"

than that, all are welcome, I will add

rm830

I'm happy to add anyone who wants to support me and who needs support. Don't care about anything else...so far, I love all the friends I've met. Everyone's great!!!

anubis609

Unless they come with a warning, I usually accept whoever the hell sends me a request. They can always delete me at will once they realize the mistake they've made.

CalJur

I accept just about everyone who friends me but you need a picture and often a profile. I figure people seek me because they want support and/or motivation. I comment frequently but if you are keeping track and seek a comment every single day and tally at the end of the week then you have the wrong person. Like most people there are things going on outside MFP that take time. I do try to find multiple ways to motivate and support. Routinely I check my list and if you haven't logged in for a month or longer I figure you aren't really interested and there is no reason to keep you among my friends. In addition, my friends list must be drama free. I'm on here primarily for fitness and health. I reserve a Facebook account (which I check every blue moon) for all the nonsense.

madamepsychosis

I usually accept friend requests from most people, unless they give off a creepy perv vibe on their profile, or I can't see their profile and we haven't had a conversation on the forums. I think I'm going to put a note saying to message me if you want to be friends, as it makes it really hard if their profile is set to private.

scs143

I don't reject any one and I rarely send out requests (fear if rejection) but I have to a few people who really needed support or who are hysterical! I only delete of you have been off the site for 3-4 months.

Contrarian

I decline pretty much everyone, but that says nothing about them and everything about me. I'm shy and private.

lmrw1959

I look for people close to my age (and that would be you), but will accept anyone. Go ahead and add me if you like.

penrbrown

I don't add people based on how they look. In fact, I care very little about how someone looks. I friend people based on what they say. If their personality seems a match to mine or if they seem like someone who could motivate me then I friend them.

... actually, that's not true. I do admit to being turned off by certain avatars.... not because someone looks bad in them but those avatars of super skinny people in bikinis or whatever kind of make me pass right on by. I try not to be judgmental but I'm not so sure seeing something like that would motivate me.

La_Amazona

I'm a b*tch. Not everyone can handle that...

If I see something truly amazing, I'll send a friend request. I like to think the ones I receive were for the same. But my friends know, I work hard at getting to know them. Hello, Q system. If it's not working out, I will delete.

This just touched me.. and you DID work hard on me!!

galegetsthin

I have an octopus in a tank with one platform that says yes and one that says no. I send a small electric current through the water when I want an answer and if he tells me yes, you made the list!

i love your octopus....

It's just because he said "yes" for you. He is also really good at helping me decide if I should get hookers and blow.

_SusieQ_

I'm a b*tch. Not everyone can handle that...

If I see something truly amazing, I'll send a friend request. I like to think the ones I receive were for the same. But my friends know, I work hard at getting to know them. Hello, Q system. If it's not working out, I will delete.

I can handle it. In fact I can handle you jusssst fine..... *wink wink*

Scott613

Um, thanks. :flip:

[img]data:image/jpeg;base64,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[/img]

grapenutSF

People I seem to be drawn to:

-Women who lift heavy
-People who are sassy
-Overposters (like me)

I've been trying to limit accepting FR lately not because I'm Hitler, but because I genuinely enjoy interacting with people, and it's not feasible in big numbers. To illustrate, I had a way better time at my wedding bc we invited 65 people. My friend who had 250 guests had way less fun. Same deal. That's right. MFP is my wedding.

Lindy901

Usually if someone has started out the same time I have and have similar goals, that's who I gravitate towards. Like you some interest in their moniker also. Interesting that your moniker is similar to mine.

ItsMeRebekah

i request if i see them around mfp town and like what they put out there.
i accept everybody. never has anybody make comments off the wall, or rude or dirty to me.. see a lot of ladies complain abt that, but none of my friends have ever been that way. i have deleted a few.. but dont delete bc they aren't on bc i think if they come back they still need friends!

edit to add -- i like to add new folks too!! they always need tons of support and im on a lot.

delilah47

Personally, I don't accept friends. I decided to try it and the one person that sent ME a friend request looked like she matched my MO pretty much. I changed my mind after only ONE day. She wrote every detail of why she ate what she ate and every thought going through her mind. Then there were the comments her other friends left on her page.. and on and on. It totally cluttered up my home page and I couldn't even find a reminder comment I had put on my own feed.

But, I think the main reason I would rather stay "friendless" is that if someone praises me for a weight loss or whatever, I use that to sabotage myself in some way. It's something in my subconscious, I guess. Also, I will praise someone for something that really impresses me, but I can't just "atta girl" etc, for events people should be expected to do everyday anyway. That's just me and I realize some people respond to daily praise and affirmation they have done well. I DO state in my profile that I am open to messages and will answer any that are sent my way. I believe a person should be selective about their friends, choosing friends who have a lot in common and who will support them in the method they need. I see some people collect friends, I guess to see who can have the most. I don't understand that.

I don't think your profile photo is going to scare anyone away. It shows you are an honest guy, sincere in your effort to change your lifestyle. Don't be bashful about sending friend requests to others you have an interest in. Just keep in mind, if someone denies it, it's not personal. Some people take stuff from total strangers as personal and get hurt feelings, etc. Keep a positive attitude and don't sweat the small stuff. Good luck! :flowerforyou:

MMarvelous

If they send me a request, I accept it. Then I will review their pages after I have accepted. Sometimes no words are required considering the goal of this site is WEIGHT BASED/FITNESS/HEALTHY LIFESTYLE! I don't delete ppl either as I don't really know what is going on in anyone's life other than what they post on MFP. Lack of presence on MFP many times indicates the friend NEEDS MY SUPPORT MORE THAN EVER. It is like the poem FOOTPRINTS...


"LORD, you said that once I decided to follow
you, you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life,
there is only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when
I needed you most you would leave me."



The LORD replied:


"My son, my precious child,
I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."

When we see only one set of footprints we need to carry our MFP friend through this rough patch.

luvnthenewme

I have not turned down any FRs, and can't imagine that I would. I have been very fortunate so far, and every person on my FL has been a great addition to my life.

I try to comment to each of my friends every day. Sometimes it is just a "Great job!". Other times it is a little more of a motivational message if I can see that they are struggling or just having a down day. I feel very good about where my health and fitness is going right now, and honestly, I want to see my friends have that same "good" feeling. Whatever I can do to help them, I will.

Maybe similarities are what draw us together, because I don't have a single negative person on my FL!

The people I have sent request to were selected mainly for geographical reasons or because they made a posting requesting supportive friends and something about their post caught my attention. I don't send requests to men (just an old-fashioned thing... I don't think it is ladylike), although I accept them. I also don't send to young people because I can't imagine why they would want a friend who is their MOM's age!! Having said that, though.... I have to say that the most motivational (and probably the kindest) person I have "met" on MFP is a 19 yr old male. Shocked the heck out of me to see someone that age exhibit such care for so many people that honestly he has very little in common with. I guess if I had been too picky about my friends, I would have lost out on some pretty great support.

nnylee

I accept everyone, as long as they realize that I might not be able to comment on their every status or comment.

I try, but I'm really busy!

Evelyn_Gorfram

I don't accept friend requests from men. I don't accept friend requests without a message. I don't accept friend requests from people who type the message in all caps, because I don't want to read that in my newsfeed. I also don't accept an FR with a message like "u look cool." I don't want to friend collect, and I want to know that I'm going to be able to connect with anyone I accept. I'm pretty picky.

You know who else was picky


Haha:flowerforyou:

(with apologies to the OP, and to Martin Niemoller)

First they came for the men,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a man.

Then they came for the those who made friend requests without a message,
and I didn't speak out because I never make friend requests without a message.

Then they came for the those who type their messages in all caps
and I didn't speak out because I don't like reading all caps in my newsfeed.

Then they came for the those who made friend requests like "u look cool",
and I didn't speak out because I think that 'q' is a much cooler-looking letter than plain old 'u'.

Then they came for those whose play fast and loose with snarky Holocaust humor
and there was no one left who seemed to want to make a friend request for me.

rml_16

1. Actually funny.
2. Not a mean girl bully.
3. supportive

Hmmm ... how did we get to be friends, then? ;-)

Cause you are freakin awesome. 1 and 3 most def apply!

:-)

But I think there's an insult in there somewhere ...

tjortegon

I accept everyone I don't care who you are as long as we are here for the same reason... TO GET FIT and HEALTHY... if you have a love for Jesus that just puts in in my top 10...