objectified at the gym (rant)

pixiestick

Dear members of MFP,

I have never posted a rant/soap-box post, but today at the gym I got so frustrated and I thought this might be a good place to let off some steam. My gym has several very large tv screens at the front of the room with a variety of channels playing at all times. The cardio equipment is facing in the general direction of the screens (like 99% of all gyms).

Anyway, one of the channels is just music videos which correspond to the music playing on the loudspeakers. Generally, I just ignore the loudspeakers and the videos and concentrate on myself, but today it was impossible and I don't need to describe a raunchy music video for you to get the point.

I am not a prude. Really. But there I am, still pudgy and a mite insecure, trying to get my body and my mind to appreciate what a healthy woman looks like while these stick-figure-D-cup-hump-the-screen images are flashing like a neon sign in front of me--> 'ha ha you'.
:frown: :sick: :brokenheart:

So that's my rant. :indifferent:

pixiestick

Dear members of MFP,

I have never posted a rant/soap-box post, but today at the gym I got so frustrated and I thought this might be a good place to let off some steam. My gym has several very large tv screens at the front of the room with a variety of channels playing at all times. The cardio equipment is facing in the general direction of the screens (like 99% of all gyms).

Anyway, one of the channels is just music videos which correspond to the music playing on the loudspeakers. Generally, I just ignore the loudspeakers and the videos and concentrate on myself, but today it was impossible and I don't need to describe a raunchy music video for you to get the point.

I am not a prude. Really. But there I am, still pudgy and a mite insecure, trying to get my body and my mind to appreciate what a healthy woman looks like while these stick-figure-D-cup-hump-the-screen images are flashing like a neon sign in front of me--> 'ha ha you'.
:frown: :sick: :brokenheart:

So that's my rant. :indifferent:

NykkieC

I hear ya! I hate how girls like that are all over TV and are considered an influence to many girls! I wish the message to young girls could be "it's okay to not starve yourself, you don't need breast implants or plastic surgery...just take care of yourself and celebrate who YOU are!"

I also hate how seeing girls like that make me feel sad, like I'll never get there. That is true because I want to be healthy overall, not just skinny.

Great work so far, I must add! :flowerforyou:

Heather125

I would rather wacth music videos at my gym you get 4 choices....
poker (don't gamble don't play):grumble:
fund a child from africa(makes me cry can't wacth it)
religous talk shows(please don't be offended It's just not my thing)
or sports(never a fan only because they're never over on time)

jtintx

Until women quit making objects out of themselves men will continue to look at us as objects.

LuckyLeprechaun

Until women quit making objects out of themselves men will continue to look at us as objects.

Hm. :huh:

Not sure where you're coming from with this...

Hermit4Hire

Until women quit making objects out of themselves men will continue to look at us as objects.

I believe I was just generalized.:sad:

pixiestick

it just seems counter-productive... you know, to have a gym where a lot of women go for health and then to have these unhealthy images advertised.

And I don't take responsibility for all women. The argument could also be made that if men didn't objectify women in the first place, women wouldn't be compelled to objectify themselves.

My gym time is me time. It's hard when Brittany Spears is brought in to the equation with me.

bathedinshadow

Until women quit making objects out of themselves men will continue to look at us as objects.

Oh wow. Sorry, but I think you need some education around women's studies and where all this comes from. Shall I just start by saying that though yes, women feed it.... it is often a requirement for women to get where they want in terms of media covered careers, and other careers as well. All of which are headed by MEN for the most part. It would literally take ALL women at ONCE to refuse to live up to these expectations in order for women alone to even begin to change this. This is a male driven fantasy and though we have come a long way, this is still a male driven world. ESPECIALLY in other countries.

So I can stand up and say "look I'm not going to wear that in order to have this job," and they will say "okay, she will." And that's just the way it goes. There is always going to be somebody out there that wants something bad enough to do almost anything. In addition, there is always going to be somebody out there that needs something bad enough that they feel they have to do almost anything. In fact, ask any prostitute whether or not she feels like she has a choice. Those ideas aren't born out of desire. They are born out of disparity. And for many women, getting a guys attention is the utmost important thing. And most men do in fact like the anorexic D cup woman that would have looked just like you had they not paid somebody to change everything about them.

With that said, I won't deny wearing clothes that show my body. I do. But NOT for male attention. So there is always the exception to every generalization.

Sorry to go off there, and not to be rude, but that comment was just extremely naive.

Dave198lbs

I do not know any men that like anoreic D cup women...NONE

so you are doing the same thing you are complaining about

Phoenix_Rising

This is one of the reasons Curves has done so well.

pixiestick

I do not know any men that like anoreic D cup women...NONE

so you are doing the same thing you are complaining about

Am I objectifying the women on the screen? Certainly. Otherwise how would I have felt myself the object of scorn in comparison? And whether real men like or do not like the above described woman is irrelevant--the d-cup skinny-mini is what was being portrayed on the screen at the gym as the object of perfection.

Tiddle

I learned a long time ago that it just isnt worth it to compair myself to others. there is always going to be someone prettier, skinnier, richer, faster or just better at something than me....and if I get bent out of shape about it everytime I see them I'll be in a world of hurt.


ETA - but sorry it upset you :frown: next time, just look at another TV, or read a magazine!

Dave198lbs

I do not know any men that like anoreic D cup women...NONE

so you are doing the same thing you are complaining about

Am I objectifying the women on the screen? Certainly. Otherwise how would I have felt myself the object of scorn in comparison? And whether real men like or do not like the above described woman is irrelevant--the d-cup skinny-mini is what was being portrayed on the screen at the gym as the object of perfection.

Pixie-

I was talking to bathedinshadow

pixiestick

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: and here I thought it was all about me.

Dave198lbs

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: and here I thought it was all about me.

:laugh: :laugh: :flowerforyou:

DeeDeeLHF

Interesting topic. Just tonight we, as in my kids and me, (16 boy, 11 and 9 girls) were talking about what is considered beautiful and how that has changed throughout the ages. The Renaisance is a clear time when voluptous curves in women was considered beautiful. Since Twiggy...things have changed. Even the era of Beach babies...Annette Funacello (sp?) would have been considered "fat" if she wanted to star in a beach film!

Something to think about...

Iceprincessk25

I hear ya! I hate how girls like that are all over TV and are considered an influence to many girls! I wish the message to young girls could be "it's okay to not starve yourself, you don't need breast implants or plastic surgery...just take care of yourself and celebrate who YOU are!"

I also hate how seeing girls like that make me feel sad, like I'll never get there. That is true because I want to be healthy overall, not just skinny.

Great work so far, I must add! :flowerforyou:

Uhhh....what's wrong with implants. :huh: Best money that I ever spent. :bigsmile: I mine.

stahlight

Until women quit making objects out of themselves men will continue to look at us as objects.

A little late here, but you could not be more right!

I as a guy would not notice a lot of physical traits on a girl/woman if they didnt compete with each other to accentuate them, be it boobs, butts or whatever. Thusly, as long as women dress and flirt and flaunt, I will enjoy the show and keep looking for the best one.

wanderinglight

My gym seems to have a TV that plays nothing but "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" and I swear it makes me INSANE! I'd rather watch the video vixens because at least you don't have to hear those girls speak. Hearing Kim or Khloe or Kym or Kloe or whatever the h*** their names are try to expound on what is important in life is nauseating.

But at the end of the day, I just laugh at it. Of course, I work out in a swanky L.A. gym that is home to the Anorexic D-cup look in terms of the real women working out there, so if I were going to start getting upset at every unrealistic stereotype in my face I'd never get anything done. And to be honest, those girls find the perfect guys to be with -- shallow people are drawn to each other and there are enough of them to pair off and leave the good guys to the rest of us!

I really do strive to just be the best that I can be, look the best that I can look, and enjoy my life, no ifs, ands or (fake) butts!

bathedinshadow

I do not know any men that like anoreic D cup women...NONE

so you are doing the same thing you are complaining about

Well if you would look at the origin of my comments, you would see that it wasn't really about me complaining. To be quite frank, though I can see why women would be bothered by this, it doesn't really play a huge part in my life. I was simply commenting on the post to address the fact that it isn't as simple as she put it! And for anorexic D cup women, just because you don't know any men that like that... doesn't mean that don't exist. I know a few myself. I also know men that don't find it attractive. However, it is on the front cover of the swimsuit issue (a mens magazine) and several others. Correct me if I'm wrong, but the swimsuit issue is the highest selling issue for sports illustrated. So obviously men like it.

So read this as complaining, or read it as me stating facts. That is the beauty of the internet, the reader gets to add whatever inflection he or she chooses regardless of the originator's intent. :drinker:

mnichol

I find this an interesting thread. I was just pondering to myself the other day how things change, revert back in society, etc. As a mature woman who grew up in the late 60's, though young women enjoyed their sexuality, they didn't generally find it necessary to look like porn stars to feel attractive and desirable by men. funny how we are not seemingly evolving in a more intellectual way. I find it dissapointing young woman are so influenced my music videos and the music industry itself. It will be interesting how these young woman will raise their daughers!!

altazin0907

Dear members of MFP,

I have never posted a rant/soap-box post, but today at the gym I got so frustrated and I thought this might be a good place to let off some steam. My gym has several very large tv screens at the front of the room with a variety of channels playing at all times. The cardio equipment is facing in the general direction of the screens (like 99% of all gyms).

Anyway, one of the channels is just music videos which correspond to the music playing on the loudspeakers. Generally, I just ignore the loudspeakers and the videos and concentrate on myself, but today it was impossible and I don't need to describe a raunchy music video for you to get the point.

I am not a prude. Really. But there I am, still pudgy and a mite insecure, trying to get my body and my mind to appreciate what a healthy woman looks like while these stick-figure-D-cup-hump-the-screen images are flashing like a neon sign in front of me--> 'ha ha you'.
:frown: :sick: :brokenheart:

So that's my rant. :indifferent:

So have you found any channels that don't show these kinds of women? :huh:

NykkieC

I hear ya! I hate how girls like that are all over TV and are considered an influence to many girls! I wish the message to young girls could be "it's okay to not starve yourself, you don't need breast implants or plastic surgery...just take care of yourself and celebrate who YOU are!"

I also hate how seeing girls like that make me feel sad, like I'll never get there. That is true because I want to be healthy overall, not just skinny.

Great work so far, I must add! :flowerforyou:

Uhhh....what's wrong with implants. :huh: Best money that I ever spent. :bigsmile: I mine.

Well, first I didn't mean to offend you, :flowerforyou: and that's great that you wanted and love your implants! What I meant was for women to think that they have to have them to look like those girls on TV.

1Corinthians13

Interesting thread.

I do know what you mean about showing those videos in a place where we should all feel safe and comfortable working out to be the best we can be. However, you'd be hardpressed to find anything on TV without women looking anything but "perfect." Any TV show - I love Desperate Housewives, but seriously, Terri Hatcher has just gotten too skinny! And yet I watch these shows, look down at myself, and think "yuck. I need to run more."

I don't have the answers - why women do this to themselves. But the fact is that we do. I personally don't know one man who can honestly say he prefers the skinny chicks. Guys I've dated like curves. In fact, my husband told me when I lost my weight that he preferred me with the weight on rather than off. So I objectify myself. I admit to walking into a room of women, glancing around, and scoping my competition. I don't think I'm snotty about it at all, but I do check out other women. My husband once made a comment that I check out women more than he does.

Anyway, my point is that I agree - society needs to stop pushing all these twigs on us, but we also need to realize that that's what they are - these women are not the ideal in health and beauty.

jtintx

Until women quit making objects out of themselves men will continue to look at us as objects.

I stand by my statement.

And just to make sure there is no confusion Pixiestick I did not mean to suggest that you did anything wrong.

And bathedinshadow, no I don't need any courses in women's study. Just because something can't be eliminated completely doesn't mean it can't be radically changed. Look at racism as an example...although not the same...but we have come a long way in that dept.

As long as there are women who are willing to leave nothing to the imagination then the rest of us will have to live with the consequences. If we don't respect our selves how can we expect others to respect us?

msarro

Until women quit making objects out of themselves men will continue to look at us as objects.

I actually have to agree about this a bit.

Women do, in many cases, go out of their way to objectify themselves though not always on purpose, a lot of it is rooted human behavior. They put in makeup and lipstick (most of which have biological reasonings and connotations, for instance red lips = skin flushed with blood = a state of arousal). They'll wear high heels to accentuate their legs and lift their bums (which in animal behavior is an indicator of willingness to mate) - despite the fact that wearing high heels has been known to actually cause damage to bone structure in the feet and legs. Both of these are signals, that in nature, say "Hey! I'm a potential mate! Compete for me!"

They turn you into a prize, and in turn, an object, even if you don't consciously mean it to. I'm not worried about women's studies, I'm more concerned about biology and psychology.

Some women take it to an extreme, and they ruin it for the rest of you.

As for showing it in a gym, that's idiotic. I'd ask them to please use a different channel? If it makes you uncomfortable, it probably makes some other people uncomfortable.

1Corinthians13

[They'll wear high heels to accentuate their legs and lift their bums (which in animal behavior is an indicator of willingness to mate) - despite the fact that wearing high heels has been known to actually cause damage to bone structure in the feet and legs.

Just for the record, I wear heels because they make me feel pretty. And sometimes sexy.

I shoes....

*sigh*

Iceprincessk25

I hear ya! I hate how girls like that are all over TV and are considered an influence to many girls! I wish the message to young girls could be "it's okay to not starve yourself, you don't need breast implants or plastic surgery...just take care of yourself and celebrate who YOU are!"

I also hate how seeing girls like that make me feel sad, like I'll never get there. That is true because I want to be healthy overall, not just skinny.

Great work so far, I must add! :flowerforyou:

Uhhh....what's wrong with implants. :huh: Best money that I ever spent. :bigsmile: I mine.

Well, first I didn't mean to offend you, :flowerforyou: and that's great that you wanted and love your implants! What I meant was for women to think that they have to have them to look like those girls on TV.

I know...I was just giving you *kitten*. :flowerforyou:

Iceprincessk25

I admit to walking into a room of women, glancing around, and scoping my competition. I don't think I'm snotty about it at all, but I do check out other women. My husband once made a comment that I check out women more than he does.

What woman DOESN'T do this. We all do. When we get dressed we don't get dressed for some guy. We get dressed to impress other ladies!! :laugh:

Iceprincessk25

[They'll wear high heels to accentuate their legs and lift their bums (which in animal behavior is an indicator of willingness to mate) - despite the fact that wearing high heels has been known to actually cause damage to bone structure in the feet and legs.

Just for the record, I wear heels because they make me feel pretty. And sometimes sexy.

I shoes....

*sigh*

I wear heels because I have a DEEP OBSESSION with shoes!!! In my next home I just want one room to display all my shoes on shelves! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: