objectified at the gym (rant)

czewwhat

I still think that there are not enough purple haired cat ladies in the world!

I am exactly Marilyn Monroe's dress size now, wow I'm retro too!

1Corinthians13

Ok - now that I've read the whole thread through - I can comment more...

As for those who have implants or any other plastic surgery... if it makes you feel better about yourself, I have no problem with it.

Here's what I DO have a problem with:
My son, when he was in 2nd grade coming home crying because he was made fun of for being "fat" - he's never been fat a day in his life. He threw up his dinner several times because he was so concerned about his weight.

Young girls feeling like they need to be straight up and down or curvier... it seems whatever they're NOT is what they SHOULD be... this hasn't changed in the past 25 years or so... I was in 3rd grade, wearing a C cup and had a tiny waist... I wanted to be straight up and down, like my friend - who wanted curves.


There are successful people out there who have not played into the whole "objectification" game - they worked harder, they studied more and they proved themselves. Let's face it - no one hired Martha Stewart for her "hotness" - but I don't think you can argue with her success.

As a mom - I have a hard time with what is shown on tv. I remember blushing when I was a kid and Massengil commercials came on. NOW - my 11 year old can tell you all about Erectile Dysfunction, several different birth control pills, several different weight loss pills, etc. It's sick.

We need more companies and media outlets to take a stand for what's right...

You are so right. I'm so sorry to hear about your son. That's horrible. I hate that this is what we have to deal with and though there are many great things about this world, there are many things that make it so hard to raise children. You've named a few of them.

I hope your son is well and that he's learning how beautiful he is (or...cute or whatever an 11 yr old boy would prefer to be called. ) and how much more important, truly, inner beauty is than outer.

songbyrdsweet

We need more companies and media outlets to take a stand for what's right...

As the kid who was made fun of to the point that I had to get therapy, I have to say...I watched TV too, and I NEVER acted that way. I think people treat the media as a scapegoat. Parenting needs to improve (not yours, but of the unruly kids) in order to a) prevent kids from spending so much time in front of the TV being inactive b) help kids understand that certain attitudes are inappropriate, whether or not they learned them from the media. Some parents are just crappy parents and they generally have crappy kids. Working with the boy scouts I saw kids get away with being SO rude RIGHT in front of their parents without any punishment. I don't think it should be left to the media to determine our values as a culture. I mean I personally don't have a problem with erectile dysfunction or birth control commercials...they're medical in nature and something a lot of people live with. I don't see them as innately sexual or inappropriate.

We have to define our own values and self worth and stop relying on others to make us feel good about ourselves.

JDHINAZ

Interesting topic. Just tonight we, as in my kids and me, (16 boy, 11 and 9 girls) were talking about what is considered beautiful and how that has changed throughout the ages. The Renaisance is a clear time when voluptous curves in women was considered beautiful. Since Twiggy...things have changed. Even the era of Beach babies...Annette Funacello (sp?) would have been considered "fat" if she wanted to star in a beach film!

Something to think about...

I'm not fat - I'm RETRO!!!!!

That damn Twiggy! This is all HER fault. I say we pummel the b!tch!

czewwhat

laughing so hard, we should go to the other thread "celebs you want to punch in the face" and add her name!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: While I am still battling the bulge I will insist on Zoftig being my choice

1Corinthians13

We need more companies and media outlets to take a stand for what's right...

As the kid who was made fun of to the point that I had to get therapy, I have to say...I watched TV too, and I NEVER acted that way. I think people treat the media as a scapegoat. Parenting needs to improve (not yours, but of the unruly kids) in order to a) prevent kids from spending so much time in front of the TV being inactive b) help kids understand that certain attitudes are inappropriate, whether or not they learned them from the media. Some parents are just crappy parents and they generally have crappy kids. Working with the boy scouts I saw kids get away with being SO rude RIGHT in front of their parents without any punishment. I don't think it should be left to the media to determine our values as a culture. I mean I personally don't have a problem with erectile dysfunction or birth control commercials...they're medical in nature and something a lot of people live with. I don't see them as innately sexual or inappropriate.

We have to define our own values and self worth and stop relying on others to make us feel good about ourselves.

I disagree with what you say...in some cases. At least with mine. I grew up with a wonderful mother. She was a stay at home mom most of my time at home. She allowed only 1 hour of TV a day, but we didn't even have time with that because we had to be involved in some sort of activities. We were in Awanas, and my sisters and I all danced. My brothers played/play a new sport each season. My mother has always told us we are beautiful. Even when I was uncomfortable with my image, which was probably from about 5th grade up (I mentioned either in this thread or another how awfully my "friends" treated me), my mother encouraged me to know my inner beauty as well as outer. Beauty and weight wasn't something that was talked about unless it was because I was complaining, and she was contradicting me by telling me I was beautiful.

I don't know how I got the image of myself that I had. But sometimes, it's still hard to watch TV and see the tall, lean model-like actresses. It has nothing to do with the way I was raised, though I don't blame the media either - but it does make it harder to have a healthy image when a "healthy" image of tall, skinny, flawless women are splashed across our TV and movie screens every day.

sonjavon

We need more companies and media outlets to take a stand for what's right...

As the kid who was made fun of to the point that I had to get therapy, I have to say...I watched TV too, and I NEVER acted that way. I think people treat the media as a scapegoat. Parenting needs to improve (not yours, but of the unruly kids) in order to a) prevent kids from spending so much time in front of the TV being inactive b) help kids understand that certain attitudes are inappropriate, whether or not they learned them from the media. Some parents are just crappy parents and they generally have crappy kids. Working with the boy scouts I saw kids get away with being SO rude RIGHT in front of their parents without any punishment. I don't think it should be left to the media to determine our values as a culture. I mean I personally don't have a problem with erectile dysfunction or birth control commercials...they're medical in nature and something a lot of people live with. I don't see them as innately sexual or inappropriate.

We have to define our own values and self worth and stop relying on others to make us feel good about ourselves.

Oh - I do agree with you. I don't think that it's ALL the media - there are some seriously crappy parents out there. I don't use the media as a scapegoat - but I DO recognize that it plays a role in my sons views.
But yes, bullying is a major issue. It is also one of the reasons why I now homeschool my son. My son is very active and always has been... he plays football, baseball, basketball and occasionally soccer. He is very competitive. I can't stress the importance that sports have played in my sons life: he learns teamwork, he learns how to push himself, he learns respect, he gets mom and dad's attention for 2 hours every night while we're at his practices (dad coaches and I'm "team mom"), most of all - he's learned to be proud of what his body can do.
His body image is MUCH better now, thanks. But it was a scary bout of time when he was unwilling to wear certain shorts because they showed his "fat thighs". Or wouldn't wear certain shirts because of his fat stomach. By the way -this is a kid who was always slightly underweight until the last 2 years... when he began getting muscles.
At 11 he can now do 50 pushups non-stop, proper form. If we hold his feet for balance - he can do 20 pushups standing in a handstand. He's strong!

My issue with the Erectile Dysfunction commercials is how they are sometimes presented. That and the commercials to ummm... get larger. There is such a thing as "too much information". Just my opinion.

I agree that it shouldn't be left to the media to determine our values as a culture - but I think we need to let the media know what our values are.

czewwhat

We need more companies and media outlets to take a stand for what's right...

As the kid who was made fun of to the point that I had to get therapy, I have to say...I watched TV too, and I NEVER acted that way. I think people treat the media as a scapegoat. Parenting needs to improve (not yours, but of the unruly kids) in order to a) prevent kids from spending so much time in front of the TV being inactive b) help kids understand that certain attitudes are inappropriate, whether or not they learned them from the media. Some parents are just crappy parents and they generally have crappy kids. Working with the boy scouts I saw kids get away with being SO rude RIGHT in front of their parents without any punishment. I don't think it should be left to the media to determine our values as a culture. I mean I personally don't have a problem with erectile dysfunction or birth control commercials...they're medical in nature and something a lot of people live with. I don't see them as innately sexual or inappropriate.

We have to define our own values and self worth and stop relying on others to make us feel good about ourselves.

I disagree with what you say...in some cases. At least with mine. I grew up with a wonderful mother. She was a stay at home mom most of my time at home. She allowed only 1 hour of TV a day, but we didn't even have time with that because we had to be involved in some sort of activities. We were in Awanas, and my sisters and I all danced. My brothers played/play a new sport each season. My mother has always told us we are beautiful. Even when I was uncomfortable with my image, which was probably from about 5th grade up (I mentioned either in this thread or another how awfully my "friends" treated me), my mother encouraged me to know my inner beauty as well as outer. Beauty and weight wasn't something that was talked about unless it was because I was complaining, and she was contradicting me by telling me I was beautiful.

I don't know how I got the image of myself that I had. But sometimes, it's still hard to watch TV and see the tall, lean model-like actresses. It has nothing to do with the way I was raised, though I don't blame the media either - but it does make it harder to have a healthy image when a "healthy" image of tall, skinny, flawless women are splashed across our TV and movie screens every day.

First, you are a very pretty girl so be greatful god gave you that, second, look at the images on the internet of the "Stars" of yesteryear, Farrah Fawcett, and those in her era, they age just like all of us, they get gray hair, the men get bald and fuller in the middle, look at Jack Nicolson! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, look hard in the mirror! Beautiful teeth, nice smile, healthy hair! Health is what we are all striving for, Old and Ugly happens even to super stars. All those images on billboards and splashed across the screen are airbrushed unreal pictures, why do you think the paparazzi get so much money for a shot of a star out of their makeup, because they look just like you and me!

molsongirl

Our children our growing up in different times. They need guidance, love, protection, touch, sympathy, friendship. They require us to be confidante, teacher, mentor, friend, parent, disciplinarian, coach, nutrionist and most of all, to be accepting of who they are, what they stand for and to be their hand up through all the trials and tribulations that this society of vanity and self indulgence throws at them. Our children are not only bombarded on TV, in schools and on the internet but withing their own social groups, sport teams and it pains me greatly to say even at home. How are we to deal with these changes when we as parents and those of influence over the younger children have no clue what it's like to be a kid in these times?? I receive kids in my home almost on a daily basis that are failed by society, not by the TV set, but by people who are supposed to love and cherish them! We are screwing up our own futures, we need to change our attitude from one of blame to one of hope and to extend a hand to those that need it. Anything that revolves around children just absolutely touches my heart, I have watched a little girl die in the ER room of FAS, with no one but me, a mere stranger to hold her hand. These problems that face the youth begin way before they can ever understand what the media is throwing at them, some of these so called "bad" kids, have never had the chance....k I gotta get off this topic cause it's way too hard to even go there right now.....peace out!

1Corinthians13

We need more companies and media outlets to take a stand for what's right...

As the kid who was made fun of to the point that I had to get therapy, I have to say...I watched TV too, and I NEVER acted that way. I think people treat the media as a scapegoat. Parenting needs to improve (not yours, but of the unruly kids) in order to a) prevent kids from spending so much time in front of the TV being inactive b) help kids understand that certain attitudes are inappropriate, whether or not they learned them from the media. Some parents are just crappy parents and they generally have crappy kids. Working with the boy scouts I saw kids get away with being SO rude RIGHT in front of their parents without any punishment. I don't think it should be left to the media to determine our values as a culture. I mean I personally don't have a problem with erectile dysfunction or birth control commercials...they're medical in nature and something a lot of people live with. I don't see them as innately sexual or inappropriate.

We have to define our own values and self worth and stop relying on others to make us feel good about ourselves.

At 11 he can now do 50 pushups non-stop, proper form. If we hold his feet for balance - he can do 20 pushups standing in a handstand. He's strong!

Wow! Impressive! Reminds me of my baby sister. She used to do pushups on her knuckles, showing off for the boys and winning bets all over the place. She's older now and can't quite do pushups like that anymore, but she also has the excuse of being pregnant. LOL.

Innerglow

Until women quit making objects out of themselves men will continue to look at us as objects.

Hm. :huh:

Not sure where you're coming from with this...

I think what they meant lucky is that all the little slut sluts on tv in the booty shorts make men think that all women are going to be like that and they give us normal (and i use that term loosely) a bad name! At least thats what i took from it!

fatstrat

Brains and confidence are hot and come in many different packages. I don't think the problem is the media, or someone else's implants.

The real problem is that brains and confidence are impossible to fake, and not enough people know that it's required so they don't seem to bother. I've seen plenty of women who fit the "Hollywood Ideal" who may get a lot of attention, but still lack brains and self esteem. Many of these women end up at http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/ and they may never realize that they are miserable until the looks run out and there's nothing left.

Or maybe not.

But the world sees you exactly as you portray yourself. This is a country where people paid money for ROCKS just because someone was smart enough to call them pets. Realize what makes you beautiful on the inside (besides all the spleens, guts and swallowed quarters), believe it, and act accordingly. You won't care what the *kitten* think, because it wont matter, and the people who do matter will give you the respect and adoration you deserve.

I think a little poetry is in order now:

Ice Cube
Sometimes I used to wonder
How the hell an ugly dude get a fine girl's number
He's gettin juiced for his ducats
I tell a girl in a minute yo, I drive a bucket
And won't think nuttin of it
She can ride or walk, either leave it or love it

See? Confidence. You'll be livin' large like a gansta rapper.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

3babybeans

:laugh: "I drive a bucket." LOL Well put, fatstrat. :flowerforyou:

1Corinthians13

We need more companies and media outlets to take a stand for what's right...

As the kid who was made fun of to the point that I had to get therapy, I have to say...I watched TV too, and I NEVER acted that way. I think people treat the media as a scapegoat. Parenting needs to improve (not yours, but of the unruly kids) in order to a) prevent kids from spending so much time in front of the TV being inactive b) help kids understand that certain attitudes are inappropriate, whether or not they learned them from the media. Some parents are just crappy parents and they generally have crappy kids. Working with the boy scouts I saw kids get away with being SO rude RIGHT in front of their parents without any punishment. I don't think it should be left to the media to determine our values as a culture. I mean I personally don't have a problem with erectile dysfunction or birth control commercials...they're medical in nature and something a lot of people live with. I don't see them as innately sexual or inappropriate.

We have to define our own values and self worth and stop relying on others to make us feel good about ourselves.

I disagree with what you say...in some cases. At least with mine. I grew up with a wonderful mother. She was a stay at home mom most of my time at home. She allowed only 1 hour of TV a day, but we didn't even have time with that because we had to be involved in some sort of activities. We were in Awanas, and my sisters and I all danced. My brothers played/play a new sport each season. My mother has always told us we are beautiful. Even when I was uncomfortable with my image, which was probably from about 5th grade up (I mentioned either in this thread or another how awfully my "friends" treated me), my mother encouraged me to know my inner beauty as well as outer. Beauty and weight wasn't something that was talked about unless it was because I was complaining, and she was contradicting me by telling me I was beautiful.

I don't know how I got the image of myself that I had. But sometimes, it's still hard to watch TV and see the tall, lean model-like actresses. It has nothing to do with the way I was raised, though I don't blame the media either - but it does make it harder to have a healthy image when a "healthy" image of tall, skinny, flawless women are splashed across our TV and movie screens every day.

First, you are a very pretty girl so be greatful god gave you that, second, look at the images on the internet of the "Stars" of yesteryear, Farrah Fawcett, and those in her era, they age just like all of us, they get gray hair, the men get bald and fuller in the middle, look at Jack Nicolson! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, look hard in the mirror! Beautiful teeth, nice smile, healthy hair! Health is what we are all striving for, Old and Ugly happens even to super stars. All those images on billboards and splashed across the screen are airbrushed unreal pictures, why do you think the paparazzi get so much money for a shot of a star out of their makeup, because they look just like you and me!

Well, thank you for the compliment. But regardless of what you may think, I was roothlessly teased growing up for my Kmart clothes, frizzy curls, the gap between my teeth, and the fading chicken pox scars on my forehead. I'm not teased anymore, and I couldn't care less about those kids who told me they were my friends - it's the reason I haven't spoken to anyone I knew since I graduated high school.

And I know you're right that everything's airbrushed. And everyone can remind themselves of that all they want, but sometimes it's hard to remember.

Did anyone ever watch that show on Lifetime where they take women who are uncomfortable with their bodies and end up taking a VERY sexy picture of them and putting it up in Times Square? They take the women through different exercises so that the women can see their beauty - whether they are overweight or merely "too" curvy, whether they are too tall or too short, pair shaped or straight as a twig - that was a really great show, but I haven't seen it on for awhile.

sonjavon

We need more companies and media outlets to take a stand for what's right...

As the kid who was made fun of to the point that I had to get therapy, I have to say...I watched TV too, and I NEVER acted that way. I think people treat the media as a scapegoat. Parenting needs to improve (not yours, but of the unruly kids) in order to a) prevent kids from spending so much time in front of the TV being inactive b) help kids understand that certain attitudes are inappropriate, whether or not they learned them from the media. Some parents are just crappy parents and they generally have crappy kids. Working with the boy scouts I saw kids get away with being SO rude RIGHT in front of their parents without any punishment. I don't think it should be left to the media to determine our values as a culture. I mean I personally don't have a problem with erectile dysfunction or birth control commercials...they're medical in nature and something a lot of people live with. I don't see them as innately sexual or inappropriate.

We have to define our own values and self worth and stop relying on others to make us feel good about ourselves.

I disagree with what you say...in some cases. At least with mine. I grew up with a wonderful mother. She was a stay at home mom most of my time at home. She allowed only 1 hour of TV a day, but we didn't even have time with that because we had to be involved in some sort of activities. We were in Awanas, and my sisters and I all danced. My brothers played/play a new sport each season. My mother has always told us we are beautiful. Even when I was uncomfortable with my image, which was probably from about 5th grade up (I mentioned either in this thread or another how awfully my "friends" treated me), my mother encouraged me to know my inner beauty as well as outer. Beauty and weight wasn't something that was talked about unless it was because I was complaining, and she was contradicting me by telling me I was beautiful.

I don't know how I got the image of myself that I had. But sometimes, it's still hard to watch TV and see the tall, lean model-like actresses. It has nothing to do with the way I was raised, though I don't blame the media either - but it does make it harder to have a healthy image when a "healthy" image of tall, skinny, flawless women are splashed across our TV and movie screens every day.

First, you are a very pretty girl so be greatful god gave you that, second, look at the images on the internet of the "Stars" of yesteryear, Farrah Fawcett, and those in her era, they age just like all of us, they get gray hair, the men get bald and fuller in the middle, look at Jack Nicolson! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, look hard in the mirror! Beautiful teeth, nice smile, healthy hair! Health is what we are all striving for, Old and Ugly happens even to super stars. All those images on billboards and splashed across the screen are airbrushed unreal pictures, why do you think the paparazzi get so much money for a shot of a star out of their makeup, because they look just like you and me!

Well, thank you for the compliment. But regardless of what you may think, I was roothlessly teased growing up for my Kmart clothes, frizzy curls, the gap between my teeth, and the fading chicken pox scars on my forehead. I'm not teased anymore, and I couldn't care less about those kids who told me they were my friends - it's the reason I haven't spoken to anyone I knew since I graduated high school.

And I know you're right that everything's airbrushed. And everyone can remind themselves of that all they want, but sometimes it's hard to remember.

Did anyone ever watch that show on Lifetime where they take women who are uncomfortable with their bodies and end up taking a VERY sexy picture of them and putting it up in Times Square? They take the women through different exercises so that the women can see their beauty - whether they are overweight or merely "too" curvy, whether they are too tall or too short, pair shaped or straight as a twig - that was a really great show, but I haven't seen it on for awhile.

How to look good naked.... great show! I used to love watching it! But no, I haven't seen it in awhile either!

songbyrdsweet

Until women quit making objects out of themselves men will continue to look at us as objects.

Well, I guess it's about time I threw out all my shorts with words like 'JUICY' and 'CHEERLEADER' written on the *kitten*.

:laugh:

Actually I do see where you're coming from, and I agree. You have to be honest with yourself when you wear a low-cut shirt or a tight skirt with some sexy heels. Men are GOING to look at you. Who says they're objectifying you? What does that even mean, anyway? Are they pretending I'm an inanimate object?

SatelliteCrush80

Ice Cube
Sometimes I used to wonder
How the hell an ugly dude get a fine girl's number
He's gettin juiced for his ducats
I tell a girl in a minute yo, I drive a bucket
And won't think nuttin of it
She can ride or walk, either leave it or love it

See? Confidence. You'll be livin' large like a gansta rapper.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
[/quote]

There's never a bad time to quote NWA. Classic.