when is it okay to post you're pregnant?

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  • MommaKit79
    MommaKit79 Posts: 852
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    Definetely a personal choice. I waited until my first Ultrasound, which was at about 8 weeks or so. I found out when I was about 4 weeks and even those 4 weeks was hard. but, My sister-in-law miscarried her first early so, wanted to wait until I at LEAST had my first ultrasound. plus, my husband had another daughter so, I wanted to wait til the first ultrasound to tell her. There were a few people we told but, not the world til after that. But, again, it is a personal choice.
  • heathersmilez
    heathersmilez Posts: 2,579 Member
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    People wait because the first 3 months anything can happen so if she loses the baby, she'll have dozens if not hundreds of people to respond to when they constantly ask how her pregnancy is going which wont help her mental state or possible grieving.
  • BellydanceBliss
    BellydanceBliss Posts: 330
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    a sign of the times? seriously? i dont think there is anything wrong with it. if it bothers you dont read it
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
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    Just a thought...back when my friend had her child there was no Facebook (practically no internet lol). The best thing with any kind of monumental news seems like it should be face to face, or at least on the phone...just my thought...
  • christibam
    christibam Posts: 478 Member
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    My friends and family and I rejoice together at happy news (a new pregnancy!) and mourn together at sad news. If I were to have a miscarriage, I would want the support and love from my family and friends; it's definitely not a burden I would want to carry by myself.

    It's easy to say that, but losing a baby could mean you just want to be by yourself to heal. I'd have thought the same way before mine!

    Also this. My Grandmother came to spend the day with me because my husband just could not leave work the day I found out. I would have rather been alone, which is weird for me. My Stepmom came a few days later and did arts and crafts with me all day. That was okay but I preferred doing them alone after she left. My husband was always trying to console me... I would rather sleep in the guest room. It went on like that for a few weeks... then my husband got me a puppy. Sadly, he makes me feel better... even right this second.
  • bushidowoman
    bushidowoman Posts: 1,599 Member
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    My friends and family and I rejoice together at happy news (a new pregnancy!) and mourn together at sad news. If I were to have a miscarriage, I would want the support and love from my family and friends; it's definitely not a burden I would want to carry by myself.

    It's easy to say that, but losing a baby could mean you just want to be by yourself to heal. I'd have thought the same way before mine!
    I've had a very early miscarriage. It didn't matter to me how early it was, I really wanted that baby. At the time, I was also working as a RN on a very busy unit, on my feet for 12 hours. I appreciated the understanding and empathy from my coworkers. I would have hated to try to keep something like that to myself and pretend that everything was normal.
  • TinkrBelz
    TinkrBelz Posts: 888 Member
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    I think a personal choice.

    I told pretty early because I show VERY fast. And, I actually spotted with three of my pregnancies, so I had to tell people why I couldn't do certain things OR I told my sons that I was pregnant but spotting.

    I do not think it is wrong to tell during first trimester. It is a joy for you and everyone else about the pregnancy and if the pregnancy is lost, then I would think the support and love from family and friends is so important. As women we understand this heartbreak and we can comfort each other.

    I need to add, that I never lost any of my babies...I have been pregnant 6 times and have 6 children. But, it is so very scary bleeding....so my friends and family comforted me a lot!!!
  • loombeav
    loombeav Posts: 391 Member
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    Completely personal choice. I've had 3 pregnancies, the 1st resulted in miscarriage. That did not stop me from sharing the news as soon as I found out with either of my following pregnancies, 1 at 3 weeks and the other at 8 weeks. For me and my family it was a joyous occasion to be celebrated. My sister has had a very difficult time TTC and has had several miscarriages, yet she has also chosen to share the news as soon as the pregnancies were confirmed each time.
    Your friend is excited and wants to share that news. If you can't be happy for her then ignore it, no need to judge and make it out as she is doing something wrong.
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
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    That's so sad, I had no idea miscarriages are so common, but I was curious about this post because one of my friends on FB posted that she is pregnant, and I thought 'I wonder how far along she is?' ...

    Have never been pregnant before, so I have no idea about this stuff. But <3 *hugs* <3 to anyone who has lost their baby, I'm sure that is an extremely painful thing to have happen. Lots of love to you, please say a prayer or send good wishes to my friend, she is a super sweetheart and will be the best mom ever 0:)
  • AngelaeLebron1
    AngelaeLebron1 Posts: 171 Member
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    Depends on the person. I always told everyone as soon as I found out. With my first, that was like only 4 or 5 weeks...then I did have a miscarriage and yes, everyone knew, but it happened at 12 weeks..so if I would of "waited" that still wouldn't have made a difference, then 2 weeks later (yes...2 weeks later) I was pregnant again with my now handsome little 2 year old boy! I waited a few weeks to announce that one & I didn't find out until I was like 6 weeks along. (It was quite a shock). Anyways, I was kind of happy that everyone knew, because I didn't feel like I had to hide anything and it was the toughest thing I ever had to go through...so I had all my friends and family for support. Every person is different, but I am a very open person, so it doesn't bother me so much.
  • SwannySez
    SwannySez Posts: 5,864 Member
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    Federal law under the Affordable Care Act prohibits the disclosure of pregnancy prior to 12 weeks and two days in the United States. Violators of this law are subject to punshiments up to and including summary execution by marmoset.
  • DieVixen
    DieVixen Posts: 790 Member
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    Its her body her pregnancy,she can tell the world when ever she wants.
  • RyLaneB
    RyLaneB Posts: 60 Member
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    My friends and family and I rejoice together at happy news (a new pregnancy!) and mourn together at sad news. If I were to have a miscarriage, I would want the support and love from my family and friends; it's definitely not a burden I would want to carry by myself.

    Exactly this. I was 13 weeks pregnant with our first baby that we had tried almost 3 years to get pregnant with when I miscarried. No way could I have made it through that without the support of my friends and family. They celebrated the pregnancy with us and grieved the loss of a very loved baby with us. With the next two healthy pregnancies we announced when we were ready...pretty much the second the test was complete! I do not think there is a" right time" to announce, it is totally a personal choice. :flowerforyou:
  • MJ7910
    MJ7910 Posts: 1,280 Member
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    April fools day is the best time to do it!

    no in all seriousness i didn't tell anyone until like 14 weeks... but some people just liek to get the news out there.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    The reason you don't announce it early is that there's the chance of miscarriage. So a good rule would be, if you would be comfortable posting that you had a miscarriage, go ahead and announce the pregnancy. And I think many people would post about a miscarriage rather than suffer alone. But it's her decision... it's always OK to post if that's the decision the person makes.
  • chrystee
    chrystee Posts: 295 Member
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    I told everyone when I found out. I am a very open person. I was very excited after 7 years of trying.
    To each their own!
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    April fools day is the best time to do it!
    OK that is maybe the one day you shouldn't post it!
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    I think people should wait until after the baby is born. Why spoil the big surprise for everyone?
  • gbsngrl
    gbsngrl Posts: 19 Member
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    12 weeks from a person that knows. People like to spread good news not bad. I had someone ask how my pregnancy was going 4 weeks after the miscarriage. I felt as bad for him and I did for myself. Take it from me keep the secret.:smile:


    ^^This is what happened to me...we only told close family at 6 weeks, but then I had to tell the dentist because of x-rays. I miss carried two weeks later, and when I went back to the dentist (should have been about 14 weeks at that point) it was awful to have to tell them I wasn't pregnant anymore. I miscarried while my husband was in Austrailia on business, so it was doubly awful to have to go through it alone (our familes that knew aren't local). After that...I would not be telling ANYONE about it until we're into the second trimester.
  • Kaa525
    Kaa525 Posts: 23 Member
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    I think its personal choice, also. I'm no expert by any means but I have always heard that miscarriages primarily happen in the first trimester. I think I'd personally want to wait until after that "danger zone" has passed. But then again, sometimes you just need to tell SOMEONE the good news, besides your partner ; ) Otherwise you just may burst with excitement.

    That being said, its completely a sign of the times for people to post personal information about themselves online. We are now living in an era of "over sharers" who feel the need to tell strangers everywhere their feelings and thoughts on everything, all the time. But that may just be another topic of discussion for another time!

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