Help!!! Diet vs Social life????

izziebear01

Thanks FunkyCamper! Your post was really inspirational!! I've been really struggling with this topic, and I really appreciate the advice. It's great.

I was in a sorority in college. A bunch of us live in the same city. We go out quite a bit. I have narrowed them to 2x/week.

I cannot offer much in advice. But.... I have had my fair share of handling late night drunk food.

If you are going to McDonald's and feel left out for not ordering something, here are some suggestions to not blow the budget out of the water:

1. Vanilla ice cream cone there, it's ~100 cals. DO NOT GET IT DIPPED IN CHOCOLATE. learn from my mistakes. Their ice cream's low fat/fat free, i forgot which. If I get a sugar craving, I might even run in and get one on a regular day. *Note: I have not researched Burger King's or other place's ice cream cones. I just speak for McD's here.

2. Happy meal with chicken nuggets and apple slices. Their Happy Meals are a 6 piece chicken nugget, all 6 together are about ~250 ish. The apple slices are 35. The 6 piece chicken nugget calorie count's very similar at McD's, Burger King, Jack-in-the-Box, and Carl's. I am not sure about Wendy's, etc.

3. Large decaf coffee. I have found this works well no matter where you go, Burger King, Carl's, a diner, etc. In my non clinical study, I have found I get less jest from my girlfriends if I get a large decaf, rather than a small or medium. Don't ask me why.

If you know there's chain restaurants you go to regularly at night, look them up on the other forums and see what people say. I was surprised at some of the Chipotle answers.

Also, I have found if there's a late night drunk place that's a little more friendly to my snacking, when my friends have had a few, I'll be more encouraging to go to the place that works for me.

If you do not want to spend the money late night eating/snacking:

1. Homemade quesdillas. Two small corn tortillas: ~100 cal ; 1/4 cup of cheese: ~ 80 cal. I had friends coming back to my place. Before I left for the night, I filled small ziplock with 1/4 cup of shredded cheese. So when I came back, I just pulled out the ziplock, grabbed two corn tortillas, and made some quesdillas. Not too bad. I knew what I had, and I did not have to be annoying or embarrassing about portioning it out.

2. Baked apples with cinnamon. You make this in a slow cooker. It can be made with butter, I suggest margarine, or none at all. But it's super easy and you just leave it to cook. It's an amazing dessert. Most receipes make it with brown sugar. I would not shortcut on the brown sugar as much as the butter. If you make this with four large apples, and you have half of one, it should run you pretty good.

If anyone has other ideas, I'd love to hear more about social life, eating with social left, etc.

nra84

I really struggle with this too (as you'll see from my diary, I have an excuse for every time I go way over calories!), especially as the "thing" my friends and I seem to do more often than not is go round each other's houses for dinner! I TRY to lay off the alcohol, but I've found I can't just have one beer/glass of wine as that puts me in the mood that I think "ah stuff it, it's only one night I'll just enjoy it!" and end up drinking a whole bottle.

How do other people manage with eating at other people's houses when you don't have a choice, and don't want to make a fuss as they've gone to a lot of effort to cook a lovely 3 course meal?! I actually don't like deserts that much, so if it ever something they have bought in I just say I am too full, or just have a tiny portion of something if they have baked themselves.

crossfitchemist

I just wrote an article about this. Hope it helps you all with your diet. http://theactivefeed.com/2013/10/04/social-diet/

AmyRhubarb

The options are not always great and I don't want to be the "downer" that's always saying "no, I can't have

---

"

I never say "I can't have" anything! I may CHOOSE to not have a certain thing that just isn't worth the calories to me, but if it's something I like, I eat it and fit it into my calories. I eat burgers, pizza, ice cream, desserts of all kinds, and I drink wine, beer, and mixed drinks. I don't know what your calorie goal is, but if it's 1200, you should look into raising it, because really, you want a lifestyle change, a way of eating that you can do for the rest of your life - right? And saying "I can't have" or feeling that you can't have a social life for the rest of your days ain't gonna cut it.

So focus on making changes that you CAN do for life, as in not restricting calories so much, or restricting yourself from certain things. Personally, I've found my BMR and my TDEE, and learned to eat in between those numbers. My daily goal is in between, but if I have a big day, a night out, birthday party, vacation, whatever - I know as long as I stay close to my TDEE I won't gain. Makes life SO much easier! Been eating this way for nearly two years now and have had my best success with dropping the fat and keeping it off. Great info here: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/974888-in-place-of-a-road-map-2k13

So, I stayed and had a glass- which means they made me have two

Did they pin you down and pour the second glass down your throat? Because no one can MAKE you have anything - YOU are in charge of what you eat and drink. If they fill your glass again, just set it down, and find yourself a glass of water next time, and don't make anything of it.

BrendaLee

I think you handled the situation fairly well. You had a lower-calorie meal and then enjoyed a couple glasses of wine. That's one option. Or, if you have a lot of social engagements coming up, plan to be extra good at most of them and then choose one or two at which to indulge. You don't have to be good all of the time. I think the times we allow ourselves to indulge are just as important for staying in track.

I don't recommend being the girl who ways "I can't have that because I'm counting calories." Just make your choices, treat yourself once in a while, and enjoy yourself.

arl1286

Tell your friends about your dieting, and I assure you they'll understand. I went totally clean for two months and my friends let me pick the restaurants based on what I knew I could eat.

Or, if you do go out, have a salad. Salads are good. No shame in that.

AmyRhubarb

Dang, just realized this topic was started in March of 2012. :huh:

TigerBite

Exercise so you have calories for alcohol! ... And when you go out, DANCE ... That way you burn off the alcohol ... I NEVER say no to wine or vodka ...

kirkor

This is one of the reasons I like intermittent fasting. I skip breakfast as routine anyway, and then on the days when I know I'm going to have a big night out with friends I skip lunch too or have a small bite --- saving my calories for later in the evening.
I'll do a few days of 20:4 in addition to my 16:8 days, or throw in a 24hr fast ... weekly deficit stays where it needs to be, and I get to have fun as well.
And then there's the other strategy of course of enjoying the company of your friends without the calories. Eat beforehand and/or eat afterwards. Drink a diet soda instead of having a cocktail.

links_slayer

The two are not mutually exclusive....

laele75

First of all, lose the diet mentality. You are making a lifestyle change. Which means you need to learn to make your diet (as in what you eat) fit into your lifestyle. If you go out a couple of times a week and eat something heavy, pick up your exercise routine a bit. Or eat lighter (lighter, not starve. NO EXTREMES.) This is what my boyfriend has to do, since he commutes to college and has to eat on campus and his family eats out twice a week.

Second, adjust your attitude towards food. Food is awesome. No food is bad. All of it is awesome. Do some damned research and learn how many calories your usual eating out fare is. That way you can budget calories for the rest of the day. Or the next day. Or measure your calories on a weekly basis instead of daily, so you can eat lighter on non-eating out days.

In other words, quit whining and take back your life from your preconceived notions and 'It's not fair!' attitude. It is your life, you call the shots and you need to learn for yourself what works for you and what doesn't.