Would this make you angry?
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I would have loved to have a mother like yours.0
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Not sure why u'd be mad about that?0
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Don't be upset she's just being a mom she cares about you. I lost my mom in 2006 and if I could just hear her one more time she could say anything to me.0
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Some of us WISH our moms would be so supportive. Trade 'ya.
Or that they were still around to nag.. Would trade for that.0 -
You're probably upset because you were just venting and trying to be funny about it and she turned it into a lecture about taking care of yourself. You'll always be her baby and she will always worry. It's her job!
Trust me, my mother drives me nuts sometimes too, especially now that the tables are turning and I seem to be worrying about her more these days.0 -
Why do people here make posts fishing for only things they want to hear rather than the truth?
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My mom tells me frequently that she is "worried about me" and doesn't "want me to get obessed with this weight loss 'thing'." It is frustrating as well.
Worry: it's just what mom's do. Maybe drop her a line once in awhile about how you had a really healthy big lunch the other day and it was so good, or that you went on a long walk and enjoyed the view so much....give her a few tidbits about how much this "weight loss thing" is IMPROVING your life and she will calm a bit. Also make sure she knows you are doing it in a healthy manner.0 -
maybe you're obsessing about her thinking you are obsessive. It sure sounds to me like she's just trying to look out for you in the best way she knows how .. some would kill for a mom like that. I'd let it go.0
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Wow! I have no idea why that would make you angry. She just doesn't want you to sacrifice those little pleasures in life. She doesn't want you to make yourself unhappy in pursuit of a healthier body. Relax a little. Call your mom and invite her to lunch somewhere where the meals are really fattening. Enjoy yourself and have a good time. I think you both will feel better.0
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what a lovely mum
give her a hug
^This.
She's looking out for you, and worrying about you. And she's right.. Don't stress because you ate some brownies.
^^^^^^ Both of these. I see people on here who beat themselves up because they "slip" just a little, and if I were their parent, I would probably be a little concerned. She may think you're getting too intense about it, since you are feeling guilty about eating a couple of brownies. I'm a mom. I'd probably say the same thing. :-)0 -
Now I'm going to have a matled milk ball . . .
ONE? just ONE?
No way would I have that restraint.........I'd eat the whole bag
As for the Poster........you obviously have a bit of a sticky relationship with your Mom, and her comment rubbed you the wrong way. I would agree with those folks here who said that she probably means well and that you should give her a hug.............BUT ALSO, if it really bugs you, you should tell her!
As a Mom of two adult daughters, I like to try to be honest with them........without being hurtful, if I can avoid it. One of my daughters needs to lose weight, but I do NOT bring it up with her - it's her life, and she will find the right time for herself to begin to change (just like I did.) Do I like seeing all the sugary treats and diet coke and fast food she eats? Nope. But I try to model something different, and eventually SHE will see what she needs to do.
Your Mom is concerned that maybe you're obsessing............and who knows, maybe you are 0 -
People have told me I am obsessive about my workouts. Remember, Obsession is just a word people used to describe Dedicated when they don't understand...0
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My mom told me the same thing
actually she told me to stop worrying so much and stop dieting cuz I look great and guys like a girl with curves
I told her I was 5'3" and 174 lbs I was clinically obese and not happy with the way I look or feel
and she won't listen cuz she's accepted the fact that she's chubby....and thinks we all should
Oh! You know exactly how I feel. Our mothers sound like two peas in a pod. I'm not losing weight the way she is doing (WW), so I'm obsessive.
I know exaclty how you feel,
and I think your mom doesn't understand that you are doing the exact same thing as her but are doing it your own way the way that works for you, and its not planned out like hers is0 -
Some of us WISH our moms would be so supportive. Trade 'ya.
Or that they were still around to nag.. Would trade for that.
I would trade you also... if my mom was around to nag me. I miss her terribly.
Give your mom a big kiss and tell her thank you for loving you so much!0 -
for me being overweight my whole life and my hubby and Mom say the same things, I feel you got mad because 1. she didnt tell you to not eat the brownie, you feel maybe like she gave you a free pass and you feel like free passes is what made you overweight. 2. you are working hard and instead of saying she was proud of you, you felt like it was wrong for working out like that.
Thats what I can come up with 0 -
As a mother to a preteen, I worry when she talks about being fat or needing to lose weight, eating disorders are horrible. I figure any mom might feel the same, whether the daughter is 11 or 40, if she thinks your new lifestyle has become an obsession. If she's not comfortable with the idea of you losing weight it may be because of her own lifestyle and anything different in you, bothers her. It also, may have just meant, don't go overboard, be healthy. Obsessions can turn into eating disorders, find the balance.0
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My mom is like that too. I'm an all or nothing kind of person, and my outlook really bothers her. I'm VERY obsessive about everything. I just like to go all out. Probably why I got slowed down by a back injury, but it's just how I am. Suuuue me.
She either turns me off if it's political or hobby related (circumcision, baking, ferments).
If I'm talking food or exercise, it's "I'm worried about you, you're depressed, you're just going to burn yourself out, why can't you just do anything in moderation?". LOL. I always just say, "it's a PASSION, Mom!"
Ohhh, Moms! They're so silly sometimes and totally need spankings ....but yeah, I wouldn't be angry, she's just doing something Momly.0 -
Some of us WISH our moms would be so supportive. Trade 'ya.
Or that they were still around to nag.. Would trade for that.
I would trade you also... if my mom was around to nag me. I miss her terribly.
Give your mom a big kiss and tell her thank you for loving you so much!
This0 -
If her response was in text, I can see where the misunderstanding is. You wanted comfort for the little treat you had that you could have gone without (and don't we all do this now and again?) and the way she worded her response it's easy to see it as "you're obsessed, cut it out." To me, having no emotional bias when reading that, I see the typical mom answer of concern that's not meant as derogatory or belittling. My mom does that with me. Up until I started on an art project and went back to working on jewelry in preparation for a fall craft fair she expressed the same thing to me, that it was okay to have a break here and there and to please not let the weight loss thing rule my mind.
Thank her for the advice and assure her you're not going to get consumed by it. She means well.0 -
I really don't have an opinion on your relationship with your mother, but I'm going to have a guilt-free brownie in your honour today.0
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Mom's are like this. My mom used to drive me up a wall for the same sorts of worrying when she was alive. "Did you pack a sweater? I'm glad you are trying to get healthy but are you eating enough? Did you ask a doctor if you could handle those exercises?"
I miss her now, and when her sister or an elderly neighbor or friend does the same thing, I have to squelch a laugh because I KNOW she HAS to be in heaven! Really... Someone else is asking me the questions that get my goat and she doesn't have to put up with the eye roll!
Give your mom a break. She worries because she loves you. I bet if you STOPPED dieting and exercising, she would worry that you will have health problems because of that.0 -
Because it is your mom. I just spent 3 days with mine and things she said bugged me. If anyone else had said them it would not have been an issue. Wish this was not the case. Love her, we talk all the time on the phone, but get us in a room for 20 minutes and we are driving each other crazy with her "gentle guidance" and my "I am 40 and don't need your guidance anymore" attitude. Have to laugh though because I have an 18 year old and we sound the same way. Vicious cycle. 0
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The part about eating a little goodness is ok isn't what pokes at me. I used to be unbalanced in my diet eating way too many "brownies". The part that makes me angry is that she thinks I'm obsessive because I go to the gym 4 or 5 times a week. I'm not a strict dieter. You can look at my diary and tell that. Hell, I couldn't even fill out my diary this weekend because of the mess I ate.
I just don't understand when you do something that is different than what you used to do people think you are obsessive.
well look at yourself...getting all obsessed about what seems a nice comment from someone who cares about you....chill OUT!!!
This. Would you prefer that she berate you for eating a brownie? You are obsessing over the brownies, honestly - since you said, "I know I shouldn't eat them" and you are getting all sensitive about your Mom's comment.0 -
Why does this make you angry? Because she's your mother and you're her daughter and it would take a fly on the wall who lived through all the years of your childhood to explain to us why this would bother you! It used to make me NUTS when my mother would make a comment about my body or my hair or the way I did the dishes, you name it...I had an arsenal of retorts for anything she might say. Now my mom has started to slip into dementia and it seriously doesn't matter why things bothered me before. I never know when the conversation is going to be coherent and it kills me. Cherish your mom. She cares. She might not know how to say the right thing to you, but she's trying.0
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A little goodness once in a while doesn’t hurt you…………..I worry about you sometimes, please don’t get so obsessed with your weight and working out that you don’t keep a balance. I love you………..mom
As a mother, who has myself at times become obsessed with weight and working out and food, I would probably tell my daughters the same thing.
Faced with yummy brownies at work, I also would've had a brownie, enjoyed it, and logged it for the day, and gone on about my business. No need to feel negatively about it.
I would encourage you to explore why you felt the need to tell your mom that you gave in to a food temptation and why her response made you angry.0 -
YOUR MOM IS RIGHT.0
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don't overthink it... she's your mom.. she cares enough to say something.
^^^^this. Be glad she cares. She could not give a S***.0 -
The part about eating a little goodness is ok isn't what pokes at me. I used to be unbalanced in my diet eating way too many "brownies". The part that makes me angry is that she thinks I'm obsessive because I go to the gym 4 or 5 times a week. I'm not a strict dieter. You can look at my diary and tell that. Hell, I couldn't even fill out my diary this weekend because of the mess I ate.
I just don't understand when you do something that is different than what you used to do people think you are obsessive.
Sometimes you can't see the wood for the trees, but people on the outside see how you are. She is seeing you describe eating two brownies and painfully going over how it made you feel, that is the part that she means by "obsessive" I suspect, not the gym part.
Your mum was speaking common sense, but it was not what you wanted to hear.0 -
Face it, every one of us here is obessing over food and/or exercise. People that aren't, don't like to hear about your daily caloric intake or how many calories you burned. I try not to talk about food or exercise with people unless they ask.0
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Maybe because she is right?0
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