Annoyed at unsolicited advice?

2

Replies

  • anna0306
    anna0306 Posts: 16 Member
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Yes! And when they are in worse shape than you is annoying, but I have a friend who was born skinny, will always be skinny, and can eat whatever she wants without gaining weight and when she tries to give me eating tips it's excrutiating.
  • momcindy
    momcindy Posts: 194 Member
    This is why I'm dreading an upcoming family reunion...lol
  • adrian_indy
    adrian_indy Posts: 1,444 Member
    I think everyone here needs to step back and relax. Try deep breathing exercises and put yourself in the advice givers shoes. Maybe they are arrogant and want to show off, or maybe they are truly kind hearted and want to help.
  • jg627
    jg627 Posts: 1,221 Member
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Yes cause as we all know their physique is totally indicative of their knowledge of the subject
    LOL. I wish there was a like button on here. I've met a lot of muscle heads that would make a box of rocks look like Albert Einstein. One almost roid raged on me for not doing enough reps the other day at the gym. He accused me of being on 'the juice' and said I was lazy and afraid of doing any real work. What is it with people?
  • Charliesuccess
    Charliesuccess Posts: 181 Member
    These people are The Worst! and Ive freaking lost over 100lbs....I wonder if there giving advice in my direction out loud but speaking to themselves...its called projecting I think.
  • jg627
    jg627 Posts: 1,221 Member
    These people are The Worst! and Ive freaking lost over 100lbs....I wonder if there giving advice in my direction out loud but speaking to themselves...its called projecting I think.
    Or envy over a gender specific part of the human anatomy. One of the two, maybe both.
  • spynoodle
    spynoodle Posts: 404
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Yes cause as we all know their physique is totally indicative of their knowledge of the subject

    I also am not so trusting of health care professionals that smoke!
  • spynoodle
    spynoodle Posts: 404
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Have you thought that maybe they are trying to be helpful because they care about your well being? Nah, that would be crazy.

    Maybe so, but this particular person I am speaking of has ZERO indication of my eating habits. If you're telling me "You need to eat better." I will get annoyed. Better than what?
  • lorenzoinlr
    lorenzoinlr Posts: 338 Member
    No. Advice can be helpful or unhelpful, well intended or poorly intended (designed to make them feel better about themselves) ignorant or intelligent, etc. Unless it's really about them feeling better about themselves I'm all ears. Then I'm free to consider it or ignore it.

    Sometimes it does help. I'm willing to sort through the clams for a few pearls. If it's well intended I appreciate it. If it isn't I just shine 'em.
  • watboy
    watboy Posts: 380 Member
    Lol "Better than what?" exactly! lol that was funny.
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Have you thought that maybe they are trying to be helpful because they care about your well being? Nah, that would be crazy.

    Maybe so, but this particular person I am speaking of has ZERO indication of my eating habits. If you're telling me "You need to eat better." I will get annoyed. Better than what?
  • theartichoke
    theartichoke Posts: 816 Member
    I don't let others control me that much. If people want to run their mouths all day to hear themselves think, then more power to them. I just say, "thanks, I'll keep that in mind" and go about my badassery.


    Also, fat people can be pretty frucking smart about fitness, so that whole 'being judgmental' thing is kinda d!ckish.


    This!!
  • spynoodle
    spynoodle Posts: 404
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice?
    I get annoyed at unsolicited advice, period. If I want your advice, I'll ask.
    This^
    I try not to ignore any advice I do get though. Even if it's unsolicited, I don't want to assume it's not useful.

    Good point. I will occasionally pick up tidbits that I find useful. I'm not a SUPER old dog that can't learn new tricks!
  • jg627
    jg627 Posts: 1,221 Member
    If someone were to look at what you eat and say ok I think you might have more energy if you tried eating a little bit less protein and more complex carbohydrates, that's constructive criticism. If someone says you're going to get fat if you eat peanuts or tell you that you're going to die of heart failure because of cholesterol, without knowing the results of your blood test or even how much cholesterol you eat, that's not constructive at all. That's just some guy named John who thinks he's better than everyone else because he's from California and you're not.
  • susanswan
    susanswan Posts: 1,194 Member
    That's one of the reasons I never tell anyone that I'm trying to lose weight (I'm just training for a race :wink: ) and when someone volunteers some fitness tidbit (unless it's someone who I know is competent to offer advice) I can usually finish the conversation politely by asking their opinion of the how much the coefficient of rolling resistance varies between bike tire x and y, or how best to achieve early vertical forearm for swimming - the blank looks are priceless.

    ROFL!!!! Remind me never to give you any advice! = D There are a million ways to lose weight. I was told by a friend here (who eats frosted flakes for breakfast) that maybe I should try more veggies in my diet. I put 6 oz of raw spinach in my morning smoothies, and eat cups and cups of veggies for lunch and dinner totaling 50 - 80 gms of fiber a day. I eat more veggies for breakfast than she does for 2 - 3 days! I just let it go and get snarky about it with someone else who can appreciate the humor of it all! Feel free to do the same with me! = D
  • HorrorChix89
    HorrorChix89 Posts: 1,229 Member
    I don't listen to any advice, whether from MFP friends or others. I already know my daily diet of BK and McDonald's won't get me to where I want to be, but I can't cook, we have no power, and easy meals are....well, easy.

    Maybe one day I'll turn into one of those annoying clean eaters that deny everything holy (birthday cake, pizza, brownies..) but right now I'm kinda okay with just sucking in my belly and complaining to strangers on the internet that I'm fat
  • spynoodle
    spynoodle Posts: 404
    That's one of the reasons I never tell anyone that I'm trying to lose weight (I'm just training for a race :wink: ) and when someone volunteers some fitness tidbit (unless it's someone who I know is competent to offer advice) I can usually finish the conversation politely by asking their opinion of the how much the coefficient of rolling resistance varies between bike tire x and y, or how best to achieve early vertical forearm for swimming - the blank looks are priceless.

    ROFL!!!! Remind me never to give you any advice! = D There are a million ways to lose weight. I was told by a friend here (who eats frosted flakes for breakfast) that maybe I should try more veggies in my diet. I put 6 oz of raw spinach in my morning smoothies, and eat cups and cups of veggies for lunch and dinner totaling 50 - 80 gms of fiber a day. I eat more veggies for breakfast than she does for 2 - 3 days! I just let it go and get snarky about it with someone else who can appreciate the humor of it all! Feel free to do the same with me! = D

    I eat Lucky Charms quite frequently! :laugh:
  • spynoodle
    spynoodle Posts: 404
    I don't listen to any advice, whether from MFP friends or others. I already know my daily diet of BK and McDonald's won't get me to where I want to be, but I can't cook, we have no power, and easy meals are....well, easy.

    Maybe one day I'll turn into one of those annoying clean eaters that deny everything holy (birthday cake, pizza, brownies..) but right now I'm kinda okay with just sucking in my belly and complaining to strangers on the internet that I'm fat

    Hallelujah!!!
  • lorenzoinlr
    lorenzoinlr Posts: 338 Member
    That's one of the reasons I never tell anyone that I'm trying to lose weight (I'm just training for a race :wink: ) and when someone volunteers some fitness tidbit (unless it's someone who I know is competent to offer advice) I can usually finish the conversation politely by asking their opinion of the how much the coefficient of rolling resistance varies between bike tire x and y, or how best to achieve early vertical forearm for swimming - the blank looks are priceless.

    ROFL!!!! Remind me never to give you any advice! = D There are a million ways to lose weight. I was told by a friend here (who eats frosted flakes for breakfast) that maybe I should try more veggies in my diet. I put 6 oz of raw spinach in my morning smoothies, and eat cups and cups of veggies for lunch and dinner totaling 50 - 80 gms of fiber a day. I eat more veggies for breakfast than she does for 2 - 3 days! I just let it go and get snarky about it with someone else who can appreciate the humor of it all! Feel free to do the same with me! = D

    I eat Lucky Charms quite frequently! :laugh:


    You really shouldn't do that if you want to lose weight. :0
  • MrDude_1
    MrDude_1 Posts: 2,510 Member
    That's one of the reasons I never tell anyone that I'm trying to lose weight (I'm just training for a race :wink: ) and when someone volunteers some fitness tidbit (unless it's someone who I know is competent to offer advice) I can usually finish the conversation politely by asking their opinion of the how much the coefficient of rolling resistance varies between bike tire x and y, or how best to achieve early vertical forearm for swimming - the blank looks are priceless.

    ROFL!!!! Remind me never to give you any advice! = D There are a million ways to lose weight. I was told by a friend here (who eats frosted flakes for breakfast) that maybe I should try more veggies in my diet. I put 6 oz of raw spinach in my morning smoothies, and eat cups and cups of veggies for lunch and dinner totaling 50 - 80 gms of fiber a day. I eat more veggies for breakfast than she does for 2 - 3 days! I just let it go and get snarky about it with someone else who can appreciate the humor of it all! Feel free to do the same with me! = D

    I eat Lucky Charms quite frequently! :laugh:


    You really shouldn't do that if you want to lose weight. :0

    unsolicited advice!!!!
    SHUN THE NON-BELIEVER!!!
    Shuuuunnnnnnnn!!!!.....
  • spynoodle
    spynoodle Posts: 404
    That's one of the reasons I never tell anyone that I'm trying to lose weight (I'm just training for a race :wink: ) and when someone volunteers some fitness tidbit (unless it's someone who I know is competent to offer advice) I can usually finish the conversation politely by asking their opinion of the how much the coefficient of rolling resistance varies between bike tire x and y, or how best to achieve early vertical forearm for swimming - the blank looks are priceless.

    ROFL!!!! Remind me never to give you any advice! = D There are a million ways to lose weight. I was told by a friend here (who eats frosted flakes for breakfast) that maybe I should try more veggies in my diet. I put 6 oz of raw spinach in my morning smoothies, and eat cups and cups of veggies for lunch and dinner totaling 50 - 80 gms of fiber a day. I eat more veggies for breakfast than she does for 2 - 3 days! I just let it go and get snarky about it with someone else who can appreciate the humor of it all! Feel free to do the same with me! = D

    I eat Lucky Charms quite frequently! :laugh:


    You really shouldn't do that if you want to lose weight. :0

    unsolicited advice!!!!
    SHUN THE NON-BELIEVER!!!
    Shuuuunnnnnnnn!!!!.....



    That's a ringtone I have on my phone!!!
  • randilynn113
    randilynn113 Posts: 227 Member
    I don't listen to any advice, whether from MFP friends or others. I already know my daily diet of BK and McDonald's won't get me to where I want to be, but I can't cook, we have no power, and easy meals are....well, easy.

    Maybe one day I'll turn into one of those annoying clean eaters that deny everything holy (birthday cake, pizza, brownies..) but right now I'm kinda okay with just sucking in my belly and complaining to strangers on the internet that I'm fat
  • amyniceneasy
    amyniceneasy Posts: 143 Member
    I like getting advice...I don't need to use it but it is nice when someone cares enough to give it. I do, however, find myself biting my tongue and not giving advice out. I will if I'm asked but if someone is making any effort..whether its the way I'd do it or not...I don't want to discourage them by saying great job...but your're doing it all wrong.
  • Jennplus2
    Jennplus2 Posts: 984 Member
    Well i'll chime in as the morbidly obese person that does give advice sometimes (though not unsolicited, that is my pet peeve to!). I do have to comment on the posts mentioning being particularly annoyed when it's from an overweight person. While i get the point, i think that just because one doesn't do something, or hasn't conquered their own personal demons, doesn't mean they don't have information that is valuable and valid.

    I agree with this. Just because the person is over weight doesn't mean they don't have any knowledge on the topic...

    I know a doctor who smokes, I'm sure he is wise to the fact that it isn't good for him. He would prob tell his kids not to smoke because it is bad for them, but every day he lights up. I think it is the same thing. He might just not care to change his unhealthy habit, the same way an over eater might have the skills to lose weight but just really loves to eat bad food for the taste of it.
  • MrDude_1
    MrDude_1 Posts: 2,510 Member
    That's one of the reasons I never tell anyone that I'm trying to lose weight (I'm just training for a race :wink: ) and when someone volunteers some fitness tidbit (unless it's someone who I know is competent to offer advice) I can usually finish the conversation politely by asking their opinion of the how much the coefficient of rolling resistance varies between bike tire x and y, or how best to achieve early vertical forearm for swimming - the blank looks are priceless.

    ROFL!!!! Remind me never to give you any advice! = D There are a million ways to lose weight. I was told by a friend here (who eats frosted flakes for breakfast) that maybe I should try more veggies in my diet. I put 6 oz of raw spinach in my morning smoothies, and eat cups and cups of veggies for lunch and dinner totaling 50 - 80 gms of fiber a day. I eat more veggies for breakfast than she does for 2 - 3 days! I just let it go and get snarky about it with someone else who can appreciate the humor of it all! Feel free to do the same with me! = D

    I eat Lucky Charms quite frequently! :laugh:


    You really shouldn't do that if you want to lose weight. :0

    unsolicited advice!!!!
    SHUN THE NON-BELIEVER!!!
    Shuuuunnnnnnnn!!!!.....



    That's a ringtone I have on my phone!!!

    You have Charlie the Unicorn as a ringer on your cellphone?
    Thats awesome. lol
  • SunnyAndrsn
    SunnyAndrsn Posts: 369 Member
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Hell yeah. The thing that's bugging me the most right now is all the fad diets that ppl are doing at my work. It's driving me nuts. Most of those that are on these fad diets would benefit way more from a decent exercise program and don't need to cut their calories, just make better choices. However I'm the morbidly obese one, so I can't say anything. I'd bet that I have better stamina than most of them though, because I eat enough calories to give me energy, and I exercise.

    They are all trying to tell me to try their 500 calorie a day diet. No thank you, I like to eat! I've mentally been keeping track of how much they are losing to compare. I just keep my head down and my mouth shut.
  • watboy
    watboy Posts: 380 Member
    They should try to 400 calorie diet. It's much more fashionable.
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Hell yeah. The thing that's bugging me the most right now is all the fad diets that ppl are doing at my work. It's driving me nuts. Most of those that are on these fad diets would benefit way more from a decent exercise program and don't need to cut their calories, just make better choices. However I'm the morbidly obese one, so I can't say anything. I'd bet that I have better stamina than most of them though, because I eat enough calories to give me energy, and I exercise.

    They are all trying to tell me to try their 500 calorie a day diet. No thank you, I like to eat! I've mentally been keeping track of how much they are losing to compare. I just keep my head down and my mouth shut.
  • MrDude_1
    MrDude_1 Posts: 2,510 Member
    They should try to 400 calorie diet. It's much more fashionable.

    I think the most fashionable diet is to say you're on a 1200 calorie diet... but not count everything you eat...
    then complain about your metabolism.
  • coconutbuNZ
    coconutbuNZ Posts: 578 Member
    I remember one time at work, platters of leftover food from a meeting came into the office. I picked up a spring roll and somebody piped up and said "You've already had lunch, you shouldn't be eating that!" - and this is from a person who is heavier than me. She also says things like (boasting) - "I can CONTROL my food intake, it's all about control". I was thinking "Oh really. Control huh. Well, if you're so controlled with the food, why are you so overweight? Did the lettuce in your salad make you fat?" um...I DON'T THINK SO!

    Yes I loathe this sort of advice.
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
    you obviously need to eat more bananas. start with three a day then add one.
  • psuLemon
    psuLemon Posts: 38,426 MFP Moderator
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Yes cause as we all know their physique is totally indicative of their knowledge of the subject

    Agreed. And based on her qualifications i guess since i am only 12% body fat and not rocking a six pack i guess i need to stop giving advice.


    OP, if it makes you feel better i get annoyed by people posting *kitten* jn the wrong section but i just get over it. This isnt about weight loss ita off topic.

    Lol