Dear Ladies

amanda11475

WannaBHotMommaN2010

It's like someone told me, "there will ALWAYS be someone prettier, skinnier, taller, funnier, brighter, and more attractive than you, so it is how YOU see yourself that makes all the difference." It's crazy how we do try SO hard to lose so much weight to look as thin as the other female in the bikini and we starve ourselves to look like that, then someone else comes along and we try to look like them. We will never be happy if we strive for that, we need to re-focus our thoughts and be happy for how we look. Just my two cents worth. :ohwell:

I'm by NO means where I'd personally like to be, but as I re-focus my thought patterns, I find I'm not so hard on myself, and the weight comes off that much faster. No matter what shape or size you are, YOU ARE DROP DEAD GORGEOUS to someone who really matters...all of you!

Good luck.:flowerforyou:

3babybeans

I knew that ***** had work done.



Thanks, buddy! You know how to make a girl feel better. :flowerforyou:

AkersT79

:drinker: Cheers!

Great Post! We appreciate your perspective!

tashjs21

Love love love!!!

Thanks for the reminder! :drinker:

fanta014

What a thing to say! This definitely made me smile

Thanks for writing all this.. see, there were lots of us who needed it

wmcnicol

:flowerforyou:

ivykivy

:drinker:

and your profile is funny. Do you know Dave?

LeanLioness

You sound like my hubby.............

My hubby has loved me the same from being 120 lbs all the way up to 268 and going back down now.........

One of my husband's co-workers always calls his wife fat though and it upsets my husband to hear him say that. :grumble: :grumble:

mommared53

Thank you for your man's perspective. :happy: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

colliertoys

Thanks for the nice words this morning as I fight the last few pounds to goal. I'll focus on how much I've lost today.

CarmenSantiago

Thank you for the post, it's nice to hear a guys perspective. It's great to know that their are some men out there that don't expect us all to look like the women in Hollywood or Playboy. You're right confidence is the best accessory for anyone.

Thanks

pooh70

Thanks!!:drinker: :flowerforyou: YOU ROCK!!

icandoallthings

Refreshing!
You, Sir, are a true gentleman. :happy: :flowerforyou:

Danke!

e11xoxo

Woot! It is nice to hear from the guys like you. Plus, who wants to work to attract the men who DO expect you to be an airbrushed model? BEING HEALTHY! That is the goal, and yours was a nice reminder since I've been stressing over an injury and a couple of pounds gained. :blushing:

fiftyandfit

YOU ROCK!!!!!!!

Healthy is as healthy does.......read a post this morning from a gal who was
frustrated using the Slimfast diet........that's not a diet, that's torture loaded
with sugar!! Life is here to be enjoyed and lived every day to it's fullest!!!
If you're healthy, you'll enjoy it a lot more!
My man loves me and my bumps and rolls, I just want to have a healthy heart
to go with!! LOL :bigsmile:

kbirky73

**le sigh**

LeanLioness

Also, what us ladies don't realize is that those models are flawed also...........

Ironically, I was watching something last night and they were interviewing Tyra Banks. She said she has cellulite on her butt and her waist is not as thin as she would like it to be..........she is a perfect example of a woman that is beautiful but has her flaws.........

Since she is a public image as a former model, her photos are always airbrushed to portray her as being perfect.

LeanLioness

**le sigh**

What is the "sigh" for?

coachkcrosby

I would have to agree. That's what my husband says. It's more important to have confidence, and one day I'll have it. I had it once when I was 'thin'. I still had about 10 pounds to lose, but growing up overweight I thought I was hot stuff. I'm sure it will be like that once again. However, in a way it is really scary drastically changing your body. I didn't notice it so much when I was gaining weight, but now that I'm trying to get healthy again I notice that I've defined myself as being 'fat'. It almost feels like I'll lose myself if I'm thin. It's really, really weird. Anyway, awesome post!

LeanLioness

I would have to agree. That's what my husband says. It's more important to have confidence, and one day I'll have it. I had it once when I was 'thin'. I still had about 10 pounds to lose, but growing up overweight I thought I was hot stuff. I'm sure it will be like that once again. However, in a way it is really scary drastically changing your body. I didn't notice it so much when I was gaining weight, but now that I'm trying to get healthy again I notice that I've defined myself as being 'fat'. It almost feels like I'll lose myself if I'm thin. It's really, really weird. Anyway, awesome post!

I know what you mean!!!

CasperO

Now this can be a double edged sword - just ask my wife of 21 years.

She was 240 pounds when I met her,,, Bo-Day-Shus with a capital B, looked like she was smuggling bowling balls Very happy, sexy lady, loved her like the sunshine.

Then she got down to about 150. Lithe, limber, a little willowy. It was nice, she was hot, loved her more than birthday cake.

Some health problems and a bit of inattention and she drited back up to 230-ish. More to love, soft and warm, loved her to pieces.

Now she's on here and back in the sub-200 world and making progress. Different territory to explore, less load on the motorcycle, looking great and feeling better - loving her more than ever.


So,,, at the end of the day I'm crazy about who she is, and the body/appearance is not really that important as long as she feels okie and can get around and do stuff and have fun. Knowing that she could turn into Jabba the Hut without jeopardizing her marriage means that there's no motivation there. If she wants to take care of herself she has to do it for herself - she doesn't have to do it to please me. She's there and doing super and we're happy,,, but except for cooking smarter I'm not a big part of her equation (I do 80% of the cooking).

She has stated a couple times that she wishes I wasn't so accepting, that it might have motivated her to do something earlier. I saw her expanding (as was I), but there was no way to say anything without A - being a hypocrite and B - hurting her,,, so I didn't.

beckyi88

Casper, that is awesome as well! :drinker: At the end of the day, we must do this for ourselves...not our husbands, children....for US! So, I think it is wonderful that you support her, love her, find her sexy, no matter what! You rock!
btw~ my hubby is also wonderful that way...which does bite him in the a** when he tells me I look great because I tell him he says that no matter what the scale says! You guys just can't win, can you!?!? LOL!

annaliza

Great words from Casper and Forkdown!

It applies to men, too, you know. I would love my husband regardless if he was overweight or not. I just want him to be healthy and happy and live a long life with me and the kids. And I know he loves me regardless of my weight so the only real reason I do this is for me...not him.

I agree with Becky...we have to do this for ourselves, no matter what our partner says. It just makes it much easier when youre being supported.

Thanks for the post!! It made my day a little brighter. :flowerforyou:

FluffnStuff

I just love this thread!
We've had some great insight by several of our male representatives on this site!

I think it brings up SUCH and important thoughts!
Like... WHO am I doing this for?
WHY am I doing this?

I have heard soooo many people say, "I am doing this for a guy.... (not on here)"... Which leads to my inteligent response of, "Uhhhh." Several guys here mentioned, that it's NOT about how skinny someone is... but how they carry themselves. Of course there are some guys/girls out there who it IS about that (I went out with one...obviously it didn't work out). I've also heard several girls say "It's because of men/males/boys/etc... that I have to torture myself to be skinny..." again, the ineveitable "Uhhhh..."

It's NOT because of THEM that we "torture" ourselves... it's what WE think they want that we "torture" ourselves! Figure out the REAL why and go for it.

I started out thinking, "I gotta lose weight, I gotta weigh LESS then my significant other, I want to look good and feel good...." Well, when you wade through all of that.... and look at the BIG reason (the one I go for now)... I want to LOOK good to me and FEEL great!

So, no more using "the guys" as an excuse... cause they seem pretty darn negotiable here...
:smooched:

kimber607

Now this can be a double edged sword - just ask my wife of 21 years.

She was 240 pounds when I met her,,, Bo-Day-Shus with a capital B, looked like she was smuggling bowling balls Very happy, sexy lady, loved her like the sunshine.

Then she got down to about 150. Lithe, limber, a little willowy. It was nice, she was hot, loved her more than birthday cake.

Some health problems and a bit of inattention and she drited back up to 230-ish. More to love, soft and warm, loved her to pieces.

Now she's on here and back in the sub-200 world and making progress. Different territory to explore, less load on the motorcycle, looking great and feeling better - loving her more than ever.


So,,, at the end of the day I'm crazy about who she is, and the body/appearance is not really that important as long as she feels okie and can get around and do stuff and have fun. Knowing that she could turn into Jabba the Hut without jeopardizing her marriage means that there's no motivation there. If she wants to take care of herself she has to do it for herself - she doesn't have to do it to please me. She's there and doing super and we're happy,,, but except for cooking smarter I'm not a big part of her equation (I do 80% of the cooking).

She has stated a couple times that she wishes I wasn't so accepting, that it might have motivated her to do something earlier. I saw her expanding (as was I), but there was no way to say anything without A - being a hypocrite and B - hurting her,,, so I didn't.

loved her more than b-day cake...now that is the darn cutest thing I've ever heard!
I think this is all sounds good in theory...PI but if it was free I would take the tummy tuck and lipo

CasperO

<<snip>>
btw~ my hubby is also wonderful that way...which does bite him in the a** when he tells me I look great because I tell him he says that no matter what the scale says! You guys just can't win, can you!?!? LOL!

Honey, I'm a pudgy bald man married to a minor goddess. I win every day. :laugh:

Sarandipity

Thank you for this, a great post.

It is nice to be reminded that looks aren't everything and that it is what's inside that counts :happy:

arewethereyet

I posted side by sides of my progress picture. I had me now, and then used photoshop to give me a few inches off my waist.

Amazing what photo shop can do. :flowerforyou:

Ten10

You are awesome! I think I am in love. Those kind words almost brought me to tears.