being late

124

Replies

  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,749 Member
    There are definatly situations where it could be viewed as rude to be late. You also have to realise that as much as some people do try not to be late. It happens, over and over again. If this person is late all the time. Plan ahead. Tell them 5 when you really mean 6 or show up late yourself, you will prob still beat them there.

    We did this with friends of ours and they STILL showed up late!!
  • i HATE being late and have only been late ONE TIME to school when i was a kid. I like to be 15 min early at least! even the thought of being late makes me uneasy... but i have social anxiety so the attention of being late IS NOT good for my mental health...
  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
    I think its funny for people to put expectations on others. When I am late, it really has nothing to do with you, nor is it about or even involve you. I am late. That's all. If there is a dependency, you need to make that clear, like, boat leaves the dock at 12:00 noon Sharp. Otherwise, there's no point to being on time if there is no dependency on it. A have a friend that gets mad when his party starts at 3, and you show up at 4. Who gives a sh@t? It's a party. It doesn't matter.

    Ugh. You people are UPTIGHT!

    Wow, really? So you're telling me that it's ok to tell a friend that you'll meet them for lunch or say drinks at a certain time and then show up an hour or more late? That's acceptable?

    That's just plain rude.

    Obviously, NO ONE HERE CAN READ!

    I said, if there is NO DEPENDENCY, then, it doesn't fuc*ing matter. If there is a dependency, that's different. My point was that some people get their panties in a wad just over the time, without consider that I don't give a *kitten* about your made up schedule. I be there when I get there. If a boat leaves, or there's reservations, or your sitting at a restaurant alone waiting for me, that's a totally different thing. But, as I said, some people get so hung up on the time, that they forget that it doesn't matter, unless it does.
  • saragato
    saragato Posts: 1,154
    If it's 5 minutes or 10 I can understand. I had a teacher who had to come to my home my senior year once a week because I wasn't well enough to be on campus and she was always driving from literally one end of the city to the other (I live on the eastern edge of my city) and was always late, usually about a half hour, but that was something she had no control over whatsoever and she was always very apologetic and nice so I never complained. (especially since she actually stuck around after my cat literally bit her on the *kitten* the first visit)

    My family is always very late. My Uncle tends to take his time with chores he has to do before any get-together and his shower or waking up from a nap and usually when you say 7pm, it becomes 8. Same with holidays. We are told to go over at 2 and the food will be ready at 3, it's ready at 6. Nothing's ever on time as far as a quoted time or an official time.

    Me, if I have to be somewhere at 11 I'm up at 8 to take my shower, get breakfast, and make sure I have everything in order and often times when that's done I've still got an hour to kill but I'd rather show up an hour or half hour early than that much late. My mom actually hates my need to be early, but especially when it's a doctor's visit you need to be early because you never know.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    I know of several people who haven't gotten past the first interview at a job because they arrived late. My boss even told me that a woman arrived late to an interview and then later made a comment about her qualities and being on time/prompt was one of the ones she listed. Ridiculous! My belief is that if you arrive at the exact time you said you'd get there, you're still late. I pride myself on arriving at least 5 minutes early where ever I go and set aside 20-30 minutes of driving time for anything more than 8 miles away.

    I think a lot of it has to do with me having a friend who always arrived anywhere from 30-60 minutes late regardless of the importance that she arrive on time, I saw it as disrespectful and just a complete annoyance.


    Who would actually show up late to a interview and actually think they even have chance at the job? If I have someone show up late to a interview you mid as well turn around and walk back out because you have no shot with me.

    I showed up late to a job interview (and I drove three hours to an unfamiliar city to get to it) and I still got the job. I called 30 minutes before to say that I was stuck in traffic (which is totally true if you have ever been stuck on I35 going anywhere in DFW)...

    this is true.

    *lol* I avoid I35 like the plague if I can help it... it just doesn't get better... Neither does Loop 820 over by Hurst/NRH... They will always make you late.
  • Jules2Be
    Jules2Be Posts: 2,238 Member
    It depends...certain friends and i work around each other and know what to expect... my one friend is always late when we make lunch plans, so i pick somewhere near a place I want to look or shop (TJMAXX or DSW) woohoo...i love her and know her, so i dont depend on her to be on time, or she depend on me.

    In other circumstances it bothers me if people are late...like seeing a movie, or dinner reservations etc...BUT i dont make those types of plans with them again if it becomes a habit.

    Being late to a regular old party is not a problem, at least not here where they last till the crack of dawn haha!
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
    I know of several people who haven't gotten past the first interview at a job because they arrived late. My boss even told me that a woman arrived late to an interview and then later made a comment about her qualities and being on time/prompt was one of the ones she listed. Ridiculous! My belief is that if you arrive at the exact time you said you'd get there, you're still late. I pride myself on arriving at least 5 minutes early where ever I go and set aside 20-30 minutes of driving time for anything more than 8 miles away.

    I think a lot of it has to do with me having a friend who always arrived anywhere from 30-60 minutes late regardless of the importance that she arrive on time, I saw it as disrespectful and just a complete annoyance.


    Who would actually show up late to a interview and actually think they even have chance at the job? If I have someone show up late to a interview you mid as well turn around and walk back out because you have no shot with me.

    I showed up late to a job interview (and I drove three hours to an unfamiliar city to get to it) and I still got the job. I called 30 minutes before to say that I was stuck in traffic (which is totally true if you have ever been stuck on I35 going anywhere in DFW)...

    this is true.

    *lol* I avoid I35 like the plague if I can help it... it just doesn't get better... Neither does Loop 820 over by Hurst/NRH... They will always make you late.

    i refuse to travel on 820 PERIOD during the week. Once they are finished though it should be awesome over there.
    I dont care what anyone says, I-35N is worse than the Dallas traffic right now. Dallas traffic is moving.
  • Tropical_Turtle
    Tropical_Turtle Posts: 2,236 Member
    Being late is incredibly rude and disrespectful. To me being late is arriving at my destination 5 to 10 minutes early. I get the traffic and such, however, try to plan accordingly. We are all adults we all have responsibilities, and being late is one of the most selfish acts around. It is their way of saying my time is not as valuable as theirs.
  • Mel2626
    Mel2626 Posts: 342 Member
    I'm a chronic late arriver but never EVER mean any disrespect by it! I just have an absolutely horrible concept of time and get sidetracked too easily.
    My parents, on the other hand, have always been WAY beyond punctual. They get to everything early~everything! My siblings and I grew up constantly hearing, "If we hurry, we can be late!!!".
    btw~ It can be equally as annoying when people constantly arrive early. Case in point: My mom is so early to everything that she even arrived before all the guests at a surprise party we threw her last year! wtf?! So much for the surprise!! :laugh: :laugh:
  • danibabs
    danibabs Posts: 298 Member
    I disagree. As somebody who is late ALL THE FREAKING TIME, it has nothing to do with me thinking my time is more valuable, and honestly, I feel REALLY bad when I'm late to things. I agonize over it and stress over it and call/text like a million times. Now, I'm not like a 30 minutes late kinda person, usually like 10 minutes or so, but it seems as though being on time is just one of those things I can almost never do.

    Or, here is what happens with me. I know I'm late all the time for something, so I say "ok self, you're leaving way early this time so you can't be late!" So then I get to whatever it is like half an hour early or something. So the next time I say "ok self, you don't need to leave quite as early, but definitely earlier than usual" and somehow, I'm still 10 minutes late. It's usually not so bad if I don't have anybody else to worry about, but if I'm getting myself ready, my 5 year old ready and dropped off somewhere, or something like that...I almost can never get it together and be on time. The only exception where I am NEVER late is when it's something like a doctor's appointment or these 6am meetings we have at my work. But I'm not on time--I'm almost always about 30 minutes early because the paranoia of being late sets in.

    Think what you want, but I'm not a selfish person, nor is it any kind of disrespect. It's actually become endearing to my friends and family, because they expect it now. Timing has never been my thing :( Plus, where I live, traffic is like shooting craps. Ask anybody from Austin and they'll know what I'm talking about. A trip around the corner can take 5 minutes or 30. It's always a gamble!

    ^^ This. As someone who's frequently late, it's not that I don't care about your time. My problem seems to be chronic underestimating of how long something will take - whether it's getting somewhere or getting ready. Even if it's something I've done a million times. The more things I have to estimate timing for, the more it adds up. Granted, if it's something important and reallllly time dependent than I'll add on a lot more time to my estimate. Adn if I am running late I always let the person know.
    But if I'm just saying I should leave at 10am to get my parents house by 11am cause that's what time I told my mom I'd get there to hang out for the day - I will inevitably leave at 10:20. And it takes more than an hour to get to my parents house.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    I know of several people who haven't gotten past the first interview at a job because they arrived late. My boss even told me that a woman arrived late to an interview and then later made a comment about her qualities and being on time/prompt was one of the ones she listed. Ridiculous! My belief is that if you arrive at the exact time you said you'd get there, you're still late. I pride myself on arriving at least 5 minutes early where ever I go and set aside 20-30 minutes of driving time for anything more than 8 miles away.

    I think a lot of it has to do with me having a friend who always arrived anywhere from 30-60 minutes late regardless of the importance that she arrive on time, I saw it as disrespectful and just a complete annoyance.


    Who would actually show up late to a interview and actually think they even have chance at the job? If I have someone show up late to a interview you mid as well turn around and walk back out because you have no shot with me.

    I showed up late to a job interview (and I drove three hours to an unfamiliar city to get to it) and I still got the job. I called 30 minutes before to say that I was stuck in traffic (which is totally true if you have ever been stuck on I35 going anywhere in DFW)...

    this is true.

    *lol* I avoid I35 like the plague if I can help it... it just doesn't get better... Neither does Loop 820 over by Hurst/NRH... They will always make you late.

    i refuse to travel on 820 PERIOD during the week. Once they are finished though it should be awesome over there.
    I dont care what anyone says, I-35N is worse than the Dallas traffic right now. Dallas traffic is moving.

    I have been up there since 2010... but it always seems like they are doing constuction up there.
  • livinginwoods
    livinginwoods Posts: 562 Member
    I agree. I find it rude and disrespectful and it makes you look irresponsible and not reliable. If my time is wasted it is one of my biggest pet peeves. How can you be late all the time? Don't you have a watch? Get up early if you have too. There is rarely an excuse for this bad behavior.
  • I think its funny for people to put expectations on others. When I am late, it really has nothing to do with you, nor is it about or even involve you. I am late. That's all. If there is a dependency, you need to make that clear, like, boat leaves the dock at 12:00 noon Sharp. Otherwise, there's no point to being on time if there is no dependency on it. A have a friend that gets mad when his party starts at 3, and you show up at 4. Who gives a sh@t? It's a party. It doesn't matter.

    Ugh. You people are UPTIGHT!

    Wow, really? So you're telling me that it's ok to tell a friend that you'll meet them for lunch or say drinks at a certain time and then show up an hour or more late? That's acceptable?

    That's just plain rude.

    Obviously, NO ONE HERE CAN READ!

    I said, if there is NO DEPENDENCY, then, it doesn't fuc*ing matter. If there is a dependency, that's different. My point was that some people get their panties in a wad just over the time, without consider that I don't give a *kitten* about your made up schedule. I be there when I get there. If a boat leaves, or there's reservations, or your sitting at a restaurant alone waiting for me, that's a totally different thing. But, as I said, some people get so hung up on the time, that they forget that it doesn't matter, unless it does.


    Hey now. I am somebody and I can read. Tisk, tisk.
  • Aureilie
    Aureilie Posts: 213 Member
    In the Marine Corps we were always told, "If you are early you are on time and if you are on time you are late." I've always been early even before the military, but I agree it is disrespectful. It's a good idea to leave extra time in case of traffic or other things beyone our control. I won't go on a second date if a guy is late without a legit reason.

    My dad was in the Corps and this was drilled into my head since I was a child. I do my best to be early to everything. Of course there are the occasional unforeseen circumstances but I always call (BEFORE I'M ACTUALLY LATE) to let the people I'm meeting know.

    I'm friends with a couple that I swear must not own a clock because they are a minimum of a half-hour late to everything, usually closer to an hour if they even show at all. If they do call to tell me they'll be late it's well after the time we were supposed to meet. There's always some excuse but I'm over it and very rarely invite them anywhere now.
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,810 Member
    I know of several people who haven't gotten past the first interview at a job because they arrived late. My boss even told me that a woman arrived late to an interview and then later made a comment about her qualities and being on time/prompt was one of the ones she listed. Ridiculous! My belief is that if you arrive at the exact time you said you'd get there, you're still late. I pride myself on arriving at least 5 minutes early where ever I go and set aside 20-30 minutes of driving time for anything more than 8 miles away.

    I think a lot of it has to do with me having a friend who always arrived anywhere from 30-60 minutes late regardless of the importance that she arrive on time, I saw it as disrespectful and just a complete annoyance.


    Who would actually show up late to a interview and actually think they even have chance at the job? If I have someone show up late to a interview you mid as well turn around and walk back out because you have no shot with me.

    I showed up late to a job interview (and I drove three hours to an unfamiliar city to get to it) and I still got the job. I called 30 minutes before to say that I was stuck in traffic (which is totally true if you have ever been stuck on I35 going anywhere in DFW)...

    this is true.

    *lol* I avoid I35 like the plague if I can help it... it just doesn't get better... Neither does Loop 820 over by Hurst/NRH... They will always make you late.

    i refuse to travel on 820 PERIOD during the week. Once they are finished though it should be awesome over there.
    I dont care what anyone says, I-35N is worse than the Dallas traffic right now. Dallas traffic is moving.

    I-35 anywhere in the state of Texas is a NIGHTMARE! I seriously never take I-35 if I can avoid it in any way, even if it means taking some crazy route through downtown Austin. Still probably faster!! There is always construction somewhere, and in Austin the population has completely outgrown the road systems, but there's nowhere for the highway to expand so we're just screwed. I wish we had light rail...
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
    I know of several people who haven't gotten past the first interview at a job because they arrived late. My boss even told me that a woman arrived late to an interview and then later made a comment about her qualities and being on time/prompt was one of the ones she listed. Ridiculous! My belief is that if you arrive at the exact time you said you'd get there, you're still late. I pride myself on arriving at least 5 minutes early where ever I go and set aside 20-30 minutes of driving time for anything more than 8 miles away.

    I think a lot of it has to do with me having a friend who always arrived anywhere from 30-60 minutes late regardless of the importance that she arrive on time, I saw it as disrespectful and just a complete annoyance.


    Who would actually show up late to a interview and actually think they even have chance at the job? If I have someone show up late to a interview you mid as well turn around and walk back out because you have no shot with me.

    I showed up late to a job interview (and I drove three hours to an unfamiliar city to get to it) and I still got the job. I called 30 minutes before to say that I was stuck in traffic (which is totally true if you have ever been stuck on I35 going anywhere in DFW)...

    this is true.

    *lol* I avoid I35 like the plague if I can help it... it just doesn't get better... Neither does Loop 820 over by Hurst/NRH... They will always make you late.

    i refuse to travel on 820 PERIOD during the week. Once they are finished though it should be awesome over there.
    I dont care what anyone says, I-35N is worse than the Dallas traffic right now. Dallas traffic is moving.

    I-35 anywhere in the state of Texas is a NIGHTMARE! I seriously never take I-35 if I can avoid it in any way, even if it means taking some crazy route through downtown Austin. Still probably faster!! There is always construction somewhere, and in Austin the population has completely outgrown the road systems, but there's nowhere for the highway to expand so we're just screwed. I wish we had light rail...

    i kinda dig your new loop!
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,749 Member
    I think its funny for people to put expectations on others. When I am late, it really has nothing to do with you, nor is it about or even involve you. I am late. That's all. If there is a dependency, you need to make that clear, like, boat leaves the dock at 12:00 noon Sharp. Otherwise, there's no point to being on time if there is no dependency on it. A have a friend that gets mad when his party starts at 3, and you show up at 4. Who gives a sh@t? It's a party. It doesn't matter.

    Ugh. You people are UPTIGHT!


    Wow, really? So you're telling me that it's ok to tell a friend that you'll meet them for lunch or say drinks at a certain time and then show up an hour or more late? That's acceptable?

    That's just plain rude.

    Obviously, NO ONE HERE CAN READ!

    I said, if there is NO DEPENDENCY, then, it doesn't fuc*ing matter. If there is a dependency, that's different. My point was that some people get their panties in a wad just over the time, without consider that I don't give a *kitten* about your made up schedule. I be there when I get there. If a boat leaves, or there's reservations, or your sitting at a restaurant alone waiting for me, that's a totally different thing. But, as I said, some people get so hung up on the time, that they forget that it doesn't matter, unless it does.

    Ok.

    So how do you make plans with friends?
  • Lula16
    Lula16 Posts: 628 Member
    I'm always early. My hubby is always late. Put us in a car together and its a pretty quiet ride. he's stressing over me stressing out over being there on time!
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member

    I-35 anywhere in the state of Texas is a NIGHTMARE! I seriously never take I-35 if I can avoid it in any way, even if it means taking some crazy route through downtown Austin. Still probably faster!! There is always construction somewhere, and in Austin the population has completely outgrown the road systems, but there's nowhere for the highway to expand so we're just screwed. I wish we had light rail...

    Try living in the largest city without a Mass Transit system... I wish we had any kind of rail... or bus... or hell, even a decent bike path...

    I didn't say that outloud though did I?
  • livinginwoods
    livinginwoods Posts: 562 Member
    If someone is more than 5 minutes late without a phone call I will order without them or start without them etc. I have even left people behind on trips for being late. Why hold everyone up because you can't get your *kitten* together?
  • Blacklance36
    Blacklance36 Posts: 755 Member
    My place of work actually locks the meeting room door when people are late. If you are late you dont get information or direction. Its surprising how quickly late people become on time people when that happens.
    I was on a ski bus once and on day 1 the driver told us he would not make a bus load of people wait because 1 or 2 could not get out of bed. Of course 4 people were late and he did leave. They were not late the next day.

    People that allow others to be late are actually enablers. Personally, if a person is chronically late than I dont want to do things with them. Its not a behavior to be admired or to brag about as some here are doing
  • Redheadllena
    Redheadllena Posts: 353 Member
    Better late than never! :P

    I'm a time-optimist. I will always think there's more time than there really is before I need to be somewhere/do something. Terrrrible internal clock, things that take a long time a long feel short to me. It's definitely genetic, as my parents are the same way. But not my sister- she HATES that we're the "late" family. I will say that I don't get why "early people" are upset about waiting either- because when I'm early I always have something to do so I don't feel like the time spent 'waiting' on others is wasted or waiting at all.

    I still DO feel extremely bad when I'm consistently late. I've being taking steps to change my ways, but it's incredibly hard (believe it or not). We're not all wired the same :/
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    *smh* I guess it's just a difference in cultures... and I agree that sometimes it's just not that big of a deal... When it comes to posted schedule like a tour or airlines or a job... then yes, one shouldn't be late... or if you are having lunch with a friend who only has a 30 minute lunch while you have an hour... then yes, that is rude... but when it comes to a party or just having a casual evening out, why does it even matter? Unless you have reservations or are seeing a movie it doesn't matter much and I don't see how that's enabling anyone. Things happen, life happens... and I would rather live and let live than to worry over who is late and for what reason...

    With that said, I am always at least 5 minutes early or at the very least call when it looks like I might be late (I did that yesterday and actually got to work 2 minutes early than today... and I left earlier today)... and my husband is usually the chronically late one... he was late to our first date....
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,810 Member


    i kinda dig your new loop!

    The loop/tollways are pretty great if you live outside the city like in Buda, Round Rock, Cedar Park or somewhere and have to commute into the city or vice versa, but if you live and work in Austin...well...the loop is useless. I'm just SO thankful I don't have to take 35 to work or to get my son to school. My poor bf works right off 35 in downtown Austin---what is really a 5 mile drive takes him about 45 minutes every morning :(
  • MrDude_1
    MrDude_1 Posts: 2,510 Member
    I thought this thread was going to be about some chick and her period.


    from what I have skimmed on this thread it wasn't far from that.
  • JennieMaeK
    JennieMaeK Posts: 474 Member
    I am habitually early...this trait is equally as bad.
    So true. In some situations it's better to just sit in your car until it's almost time to arrive. We just did a lot of interviews at my company and a couple of people showed up 20 minutes early. That did not impress the interviewer who had to drop everything to see them.

    This happens a LOT at my job. Everytime it happens HR makes a huge sigh along with some comment as to why they are so early. (it's usually 20-30 minutes too early)

    I do interviews at my work, but we do group interviews, so if you're early and it's the first appointment, I'm sorry, but you're going to have to wait. I had someone show up 45 minutes early. We do the interviews in 30 minute time frames so if you arrive 30 or more minutes early and there is room in the earlier group I'll fit you in, but if that group is full (we do a max of 6 interviews at a time or else they will run late), then you're going to have to wait.

    I'm the person who shows up early usually. I always have a book in my purse so I don't mind waiting, that's me chosing to spend my time that way. If we are suppose to meet up, then show me the same respect I show you and be on time.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member


    i kinda dig your new loop!

    The loop/tollways are pretty great if you live outside the city like in Buda, Round Rock, Cedar Park or somewhere and have to commute into the city or vice versa, but if you live and work in Austin...well...the loop is useless. I'm just SO thankful I don't have to take 35 to work or to get my son to school. My poor bf works right off 35 in downtown Austin---what is really a 5 mile drive takes him about 45 minutes every morning :(

    What is it about 35 that just kills traffic? Oh and SH360 is just as bad during rush hour... my DH had a job interview and mistakenly took 360... I think he was a few minutes late... He would have been later had I not navigated him through the city streets.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    I'm the person who shows up early usually. I always have a book in my purse so I don't mind waiting, that's me chosing to spend my time that way. If we are suppose to meet up, then show me the same respect I show you and be on time.

    That's what a smart phone is for, isn't it.... If I'm early, I just play with facebook or pinterest for a bit.
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459


    i kinda dig your new loop!

    The loop/tollways are pretty great if you live outside the city like in Buda, Round Rock, Cedar Park or somewhere and have to commute into the city or vice versa, but if you live and work in Austin...well...the loop is useless. I'm just SO thankful I don't have to take 35 to work or to get my son to school. My poor bf works right off 35 in downtown Austin---what is really a 5 mile drive takes him about 45 minutes every morning :(

    What is it about 35 that just kills traffic? Oh and SH360 is just as bad during rush hour... my DH had a job interview and mistakenly took 360... I think he was a few minutes late... He would have been later had I not navigated him through the city streets.

    360 ugh! ok pretty much traffic sucks in DFW. I think 20 is the only freeway that is ok-ish.
  • Redheadllena
    Redheadllena Posts: 353 Member
    I thought this thread was going to be about some chick and her period.


    from what I have skimmed on this thread it wasn't far from that.

    ^LOL!