What if your husband doesn't want you to lose weight?

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  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    I feel you have a responsibility to atleast try to maintain where you were when you met.
    Excuse me what? I don't remember that being part of the marriage vows.

    I'm not sure my personal feelings have to be part of my marriage vows to be valid.
    Your personal feelings need to stay the **** out of MY life. You just said "I feel YOU have a responsibility..." and what I do is not YOUR call.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    How does your weight make the sex better, exactly? O.o


    I was actually trying to avoid posting this on MFP but I do believe its a fair question. My hubby is actually VERY well indoud (sp). He says when I am smaller he has to be careful not to hurt me or himself. I can't really explain it but I do understand what he is saying.
    You and your husband need a better understanding of female anatomy.
  • enchantedbunny
    enchantedbunny Posts: 88
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    Question -- is he genuinely "protesting" (for lack of better words) the weight loss or is he perhaps doing it to be nice? My boyfriend tells me I don't need to lose weight, but it doesn't keep him from being supportive of my wanting to be healthier and more confident in how my body looks. Just a thought.
  • CarriLu123
    CarriLu123 Posts: 82 Member
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    I feel you have a responsibility to atleast try to maintain where you were when you met.
    Excuse me what? I don't remember that being part of the marriage vows.

    I'm not sure my personal feelings have to be part of my marriage vows to be valid.
    Your personal feelings need to stay the **** out of MY life. You just said "I feel YOU have a responsibility..." and what I do is not YOUR call.

    Your so friendly... Thanks for the input :huh:
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    I feel you have a responsibility to atleast try to maintain where you were when you met.
    Excuse me what? I don't remember that being part of the marriage vows.

    I'm not sure my personal feelings have to be part of my marriage vows to be valid.
    Your personal feelings need to stay the **** out of MY life. You just said "I feel YOU have a responsibility..." and what I do is not YOUR call.

    Your so friendly... Thanks for the input :huh:
    Thanks for telling me what my responsibilities to my husband are.
  • CarriLu123
    CarriLu123 Posts: 82 Member
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    Question -- is he genuinely "protesting" (for lack of better words) the weight loss or is he perhaps doing it to be nice? My boyfriend tells me I don't need to lose weight, but it doesn't keep him from being supportive of my wanting to be healthier and more confident in how my body looks. Just a thought.

    He is supportive to an extent but mentions often it is not his preferance.
  • CarriLu123
    CarriLu123 Posts: 82 Member
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    I feel you have a responsibility to atleast try to maintain where you were when you met.
    Excuse me what? I don't remember that being part of the marriage vows.

    I'm not sure my personal feelings have to be part of my marriage vows to be valid.
    Your personal feelings need to stay the **** out of MY life. You just said "I feel YOU have a responsibility..." and what I do is not YOUR call.

    Your so friendly... Thanks for the input :huh:
    Thanks for telling me what my responsibilities to my husband are.

    Thanks for thinking the everything is directed at you instead of in general.
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
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    It seems to me he's insecure and is afraid he will lose you. My hubby always calls me hot while I am 5'7 and 181 lbs but he never stops me with my weightloss. He has also stopped buying junk food which he LOVES!!!!
  • Ruger2506
    Ruger2506 Posts: 309 Member
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    You have to do it for yourself. Not for someone else.

    My fiancé wants me to stay bigger as well. I won't do it.
  • MsGunnShow
    MsGunnShow Posts: 2
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    Maybe she doesn't like a skinny stick man, she obviously liked you for who you were to begin with. a lot of women feel safer with a bigger man, not necessarily "FAT" but bigger.
  • wonderwomanwannaB
    wonderwomanwannaB Posts: 111
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    Losing the weight will probably make you healthier. Healthier you typically means the longer you stick around. Live longer... MORE SEX!
  • adamtall
    adamtall Posts: 275 Member
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    not sure if this was put in here already but here i go

    im an enjoyer of bigger girls, i dont know why i just find them extreamly sexy, as long as they are not super obese and unhealthy. with that being said i would rather my wife be healthy and happy with herself more than me being happy that shes a bigger girl. he is probally a little insecure with himself and is projecting it onto you with saying the sex is better and as everyone else has said i promise he wont stop having sex with you if you lose weight lol
  • LizKurz
    LizKurz Posts: 340 Member
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    What if your husband wanted you to lose weight but you were happy with where you are?
    Would you lose weight because HE wanted you to? Or would you remain at your happy weight?

    Its your body and your health, so its your choice! --

    Actually yes I would. I feel you have a responsibility to atleast try to maintain where you were when you met. I would never tell him but if he gained massive weight I wouldn't be anywhere near as attracted to him as I am now.

    Can I ask why? I don't think it would be the actual weight, seeing as how you're thinking of keeping your weight, despite your health, weight on your husband shouldn't be a problem.

    So I'm guessing it would be more about him "letting himself go" and not caring about his health?
  • kristelpoole
    kristelpoole Posts: 440 Member
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    You're husband is super in shape and said that together you are a 10? If my bf said that to me, I would slap him to Saturn. Do you really think that is cute? That didn't hurt your feelings on some level?

    I don't know your husband, nor you, but the things you are saying make it sound like he has manipulated you to an extent. Maybe not on purpose, who knows, but it sounds like he wants the control or the power of being the one with the "healthy fit body" in the relationship.

    Lastly, your parts will be the same no matter. So...

    ETA: I have the same feeling you do that we should maintain our bodies for our husbands and wives. It's not a hokie concept, I think it's a nice thing to do and it's just one more motivator for myself. But to that end, I would think this would also include keeping up your health and wellness, and if you need to lose weight to do that, how could that be a bad thing for your relationship? As long as you are improving, you should be supported for that - and same goes for him.
  • mbts08
    mbts08 Posts: 284 Member
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    I have heard that a lot of men are afraid if their wife loses weight that she will leave him. Maybe he is just a little insecure.

    Sometimes you need to compromise, but not with your health.

    Exaclty my problem, DH is very insecure!

    I don't like it, makes my motivation level go way down.

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