Passive aggressive much?

myfitnessnmhoy · April 2012

Thanks, all! I help provide food and we have community food. I live at home with my parents so I'm not sure what the deal is.... They know how sensitive I am, so I don't think it's a joke. The only thing I can think of is that me and my parents are the only ones in this house who pay for food! Maybe they did it so that food doesn't go so fast. I just wish they'd have said something so I wouldn't feel depressed and angry over this. I'm not gonna let this derail all my good efforts!

Rather than being depressed and angry, why not simply ask why it's there? Strange as it may seem, there may be a logical explanation.

If the explanation is as you suspect, buy a dorm fridge, put it in your own space (bedroom, whatever), and keep your food there. You're doing great on the weight loss, you don't need "help", especially demeaning help like that. But it might not have been intended that way, and it might be there for a different reason.

And, as others have said, if you have the means and opportunity, it might be time to explore living in your own space.

myfitnessnmhoy · April 2012

I'm not sure how to say this politely, and it's not meant to be rude, but...

If you look up "passive-aggressive" in the dictionary, there has to be something about having an issue with someone you are close to and complaining to everyone BUT them about it. You aren't helping things getting yourself riled up about it, tempesting an Internet teapot over it, and not talking to them about it. You're getting upset without finding out whether you SHOULD be upset.

Talk to them about it. Calmly, clearly, and now. Sit down with them over a cup of tea and ask, politely, why the lock is there. If the explanation is because they think you need help with weight loss, point out that you ARE losing weight and are on a path that is working, and explain that it upsets you and risks the plan that you, as an independent individual, are working on.

If the explanation is anything else, work it out like adults. Don't get angry. Work it out.

If both of you go passive-aggressive, things can get ugly very fast. I've seen relationships end in very nasty ways when neither will talk TO the other and they both do passive-aggressive things like talk ABOUT the other to everyone else (or on Internet forums).

umachanxo · April 2012

I'd move out.

AllTehBeers · April 2012

Bump!

snarky · April 2012

Honey - don't take crazy personally.

Great line! I wish I had learned THIS growing up!!

tbetts23 · April 2012

bump

rchambers2072 · April 2012

Want to hear the end of this too! I would pissed!

geckofli · April 2012

Wow that's nutso, what a weird thing to do
I'd be tempted to unplug it before I went out shopping for my own little bar fridge

DSCLBD · April 2012

When we were kids our fridge had a padlock on it ... I always thought it was because there were 5 kids and no money ... talking to mum about it a couple weeks ago when I joked about putting a lock on the fridge to keep my 2 year old from getting into it and saying how it was such a good idea when we were kids, she was horrified that is what we thought ... the hinge broke on the door and the only thing holding it on was the padlock :laugh:

Sometimes things are not as they seem

But if it is what it looks like then just know they are douche bags !!!

rml_16 · April 2012

When we were kids our fridge had a padlock on it ... I always thought it was because there were 5 kids and no money ... talking to mum about it a couple weeks ago when I joked about putting a lock on the fridge to keep my 2 year old from getting into it and saying how it was such a good idea when we were kids, she was horrified that is what we thought ... the hinge broke on the door and the only thing holding it on was the padlock :laugh:

Sometimes things are not as they seem

But if it is what it looks like then just know they are douche bags !!!

That's too funny!

labtracks · April 2012

Do they know or have they seen the progress you have made on your own? IF this is directed at you (it may not be), it would seem that they are not aware of how well you are already doing and definitely are confused about the best way to help. If you can keep your tears and/or anger at bay long enough to talk with them I would try to explain what you need from them that would help instead of this that hurts. Especially if they are thin people and don't struggle with these issues... not meaning to offend, but if they've never been "here" they just don't understand.

castadiva · April 2012

Er, don't suppose there's a dog (or even a large cat) in the house? We had to put a special lock on our fridge to stop the dog getting into it and then getting sick because it ate everything it could reach. That's about the only reason I can think of... Do let us know what happens.

Krissy366 · April 2012

Honey - don't take crazy personally.

Great line! I wish I had learned THIS growing up!!

I agree.

Meanwhile - do you have a cat? Maybe the cat has been watching You Tube vids of the cat that learned how to get into the freezer for the fishsticks. LOL. Curious to find out how this is resolved.

zyxst · April 2012

Bumping for what happened.

maygans · April 2012

*waiting to hear the end of the fridge saga*

Same here!

meghan1789 · April 2012

So what happened?

Claire594 · April 2012

Bump to find out why they did it. Not that there'd be any reasonable reason.

kjerstenkipp · April 2012

I would have walked in the living room swinging that padlock at someone's head...ok that may a bit much but seriously I would have a WTF talk with my family....