Dealing with an abusive person...

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  • roachhaley
    roachhaley Posts: 978 Member
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    First of all, dont worry about future job interviews. No real boss/manager will care, and if they do, they probably aren't good either.

    Also I'd like to say that I've been in lots of these situations, having worked in restaurants and the food business most of my teenage years. I agree with a previous poster that as soon as you start to bully them back, they back off a LOT. I used to be a pushover when it came to a manager or higher-up, but now I stand my ground on everything and I'm a lot better off (mentally, as Ive actually been fired for this behaviour once...oops).
  • roachhaley
    roachhaley Posts: 978 Member
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    And btw, it IS illegal for them not to pay you for training.
  • tabulator32
    tabulator32 Posts: 701 Member
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    Don't take **** from a rude boss. Life's too short.

    Find another job in sane environment.

    Obviously the rest of his crew puts up with his BS and are happy with it. How bizarre.
  • xarla16
    xarla16 Posts: 84 Member
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    I think you did absolutely the right thing. Also, you have every right to ask about the pay. Any sensible management wouldn't belittle you for asking that, it's the reason you're going to work! On another note, I can't believe they're allowed to pay that little money. The minimum wage where I live is $10.00/hour.

    Don't beat yourself up over this, you did absolutely nothing wrong. You have rights and I personally would not feel safe working in an environment like that. No future job would penalize you for this, and you have no reason you should have to bring it up.
  • tabulator32
    tabulator32 Posts: 701 Member
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    And btw, it IS illegal for them not to pay you for training.

    Unless it is specifically declared an unpaid internship, which I don't believe is the case.
  • chricoll
    chricoll Posts: 1
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    Dear Ang

    I do voluntary work with young adults who have had similar life experiences, so know how fragile you must be, but it sounds like you are doing a fantastic job. Please don’t let a fool like that ruin all the hard work that you have done getting your life back together. I have nothing but admiration for you; and you should be applauded for all your hard work. That gentleman (I use the term loosely) should be ashamed of himself. You are correct that no-one has the right to talk to you in that manner and yes in the work place it is illegal as it’s classed as abuse.

    Be assured that anyone with half a brain would have asked the same questions you did; I know I certainly would have.

    Thinking outside the box, the Gent must be a very unhappy man indeed to be so angry all the time, maybe he has his own issues to work through, but it’s no environment to work in. I feel sorry for anyone who did not have the common sense to stay well away. Well done for standing up for yourself.

    Keep your chin up

    Chrissie
  • bio_fit
    bio_fit Posts: 307 Member
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    I guess the easiest thing would be to say that the salary offered was not the one previously agreed?
  • jenbusick
    jenbusick Posts: 528 Member
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    I quit a job after one day once. We were inventorying warehouses, and they sent us up on order-pickers, 30 feet in the air, without any kind of fall protection, and we were supposed to walk from the picker to the platform and count stuff, then step back onto the picker. When I asked about fall protection they looked at me like *I* was the one who was nuts.

    Sorry, dudes, not risking my life for $11/hr. Fall 30 feet onto concrete and die because you're too cheap to buy a harness and lanyard getup? Not doing it. I just never went back.

    It never showed up on anything and never gave me any problems.

    You did the right thing. Take care of yourself.
  • angels960
    angels960 Posts: 35 Member
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    hey chin up and dont worry, just dont write it down on your resume and look for another job, no one needs to know you ever worked there.
  • ChristineS_51
    ChristineS_51 Posts: 872 Member
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    That sounds like you have the best option - not working there. What a mongrel boss he would have been. Use the whole situation as a learning tool, and it can be an example of how you managed a difficult situation! You did the right things - communicating, discussing, coming to a "negotiated" resolution - he didn't.

    You made the right decision, it is very upsetting for you but you have done the right thing. Take care. :flowerforyou:
  • angbieb
    angbieb Posts: 692 Member
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    Thank you so much...everybody! That's why I love this place, the people on here are so great! I feel a lot better after reading your posts! Before I felt so alone, thank you all so much.
    :heart:
  • inside_lap
    inside_lap Posts: 738 Member
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    What an *kitten*. I would say report him unless the reporting process is just going to add more stress to your life right now. Ultimately you need to do what's right for you. *hugs*
  • katysmelly
    katysmelly Posts: 380 Member
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    A) You did the right thing by not going back. In fact, it was very professional and generous of you to even call and tell him.
    B) You don't need to tell anybody about this "job." Don't put it on applications or anything. You didn't actually work there. It's not like there will be this suspicious gap in your resume that needs to be explained. Forget about it.
    C) It probably wouldn't be worth the headache to try and get paid for the few hours you were there. Some people may enjoy fighting for it just to see justice, but you sound a little bit fragile and if you just chalk those few hours up to experience and move on, that may be best for you.

    I'm sorry you had this experience. Good for you for not going back. It would have only gotten worse.
  • angbieb
    angbieb Posts: 692 Member
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    oops
  • tonilizzy88
    tonilizzy88 Posts: 968 Member
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    ang,

    you need to rinf the head manager and explain to him exactly what happened just like you have with us. he/she is the only one that will be able to sort the person out. try not to let it get to you as i know you were slowley coming on with your esteem.

    if they dont do anything about it then there are ways of the law you can take it further if you wanted to.

    you need to remember THIS IS NOT YOU FAULT that some arigant man took his small fuse out on you xxxxxx:heart:
  • angbieb
    angbieb Posts: 692 Member
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    A) You did the right thing by not going back. In fact, it was very professional and generous of you to even call and tell him.

    Thank you...it was very hard making that call, I was scared and I knew he would be upset...completely shocked when he just hung up!
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    You did absolutely nothing wrong. There are plenty of jobs that will work around school where you are treated with respect by professionals who don't lie about salaries or expect free work from you.
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
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    A) You did the right thing by not going back. In fact, it was very professional and generous of you to even call and tell him.

    Thank you...it was very hard making that call, I was scared and I knew he would be upset...completely shocked when he just hung up!
    I'm willing to bet you aren't the first person to be screwed around by this jerk, and you won't be the last. No worries....karma will get around to him eventually!
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
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    If you only worked there for a day or two, don't bother putting it on a resume or disclosing it. That sounds like a horrible place to work and I think you are very right for staying away. He wouldn't have gotten any better with time.
  • XXXMinnieXXX
    XXXMinnieXXX Posts: 3,459 Member
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    hi, it's Zara :flowerforyou:

    Its normal to feel fragile after everything you've been through. I think you need to go to the doctor and tell him your still struggling. I think you need some therapy. Its so much for a person to deal with.
    Concerning the job, no it wont show up on your background check, nobody need ever know you worked there! You were right to quit, whether your feeling fragile or not, its not a good environment to work in and its not right. You should never have to put up with that! Well done for getting out. Dont worry about it! you did nothing wrong and nobody ever needs to know you worked there for a day! PM me if you need to chat xxx :heart:

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