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HOW DO YOU TELL SOMEONE THAT YOU DON'T LOVE THEM ANYMORE

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Replies

  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
    have that horribly uncomfortable conversation with him.

    this happened to me and by the time she told me the damage was already done because she waited and I ended up being the last to know.

    I fell deeper into depression and one night I packed my stuff and left. I wouldn't come see her or the kids, she had to bring them to me and I seldom had time to see them because I was busy with work school and an internship. the only times I saw them before this was in passing time and on my days off.

    she changed her mind and we got back together but now I'm faced with the question, am I being used, does she really care. and are all women dishonest.

    as you can probably guess I see all women differently because of this experience. still love my wife and we have worked things out and are still working but it's not the same. my opinion of women has changed dramatically.
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
    Tell him the truth. Tell him you don't love him the way you use to and it's time for you both to move on.

    Best of luck :flowerforyou:
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    "It's not you; It's me." My personal favorite.
  • Foxypoo61287
    Foxypoo61287 Posts: 638 Member
    It sucks. Im in a relationship right now, and I know its over. It's been over for a while. I just keep letting it go on and on. I have a child with him, so it's a little more difficult. And he is very mean. Not like abusive mean, just mean in general. I started going to the gym & he always has something to say about that. And the fact that I like to go line dancing. And he thinks that when I go line dancing that I'm going to meet guys. He lies, he's been unfaithful, and the list goes on and on. He doesn't have a job, and I finally said I'm done. And he doesn't really believe that I"m moving out. He will find out that I'm serious when it happens. Oh well. I would just tell him and it's going to hurt him. But you have to do what's right for you. Good luck honey.
  • kwith1014
    kwith1014 Posts: 144
    5 YEARS HUH??? you must have loved him when you moved in together.
    Love is a choice and a committment, you are not choosing to love him or be committed to him anymore.
    I think you should try and work it out, figure out whats inside of you that you don't love him anymore.

    I did love him and trust me I have tried over the last couple of years. I can't make feelings happen that just aren't there anymore. I'm not putting in my 100% either at this point and that's just not fair for him either. I feel like in order for me to figure out what's inside of me, I need to be alone to figure that out. Maybe I will figure out that I made a huge mistake but I don't think that I can figure that out with him still around every day!
  • Tybalt71
    Tybalt71 Posts: 1,064 Member
    Simple It's not you its me, no really its you!-TY
  • Tybalt71
    Tybalt71 Posts: 1,064 Member
    Does he deserve to be in a relationship with someone who's just going through the motions or do you think he deserves to find someone who loves him?

    Cause he wont fill the void until there is one.

    You guys are comfortably numb and that's no way to go through life :(
    *raises eyebrow*
  • tabinmaine
    tabinmaine Posts: 965 Member
    You clearly are a conflict avoider and you are lacking skills to put your foot down and make it clear that he has to move out.

    He knows this...and until you have finally had enough and put your foot down he will continue to live in your house and ignore what you have said. He knows he can get away with this because he has lived with you for 5 yrs and knows you don't like conflict and are not in the least bit assertive.

    Time to put your big girl panties on and INSIST he find himself a new place to live. Or... carry on as you have been and stop wishing something would happen.....
  • lorro
    lorro Posts: 917 Member
    Word of advice: If you are worried about things turning ugly, then invite him out for dinner and tell him there.

    Make sure you have alternative plans that you can fall back on for your safety. Your close friends should be aware of what is going on.

    Good luck!

    ^^^ Agreed. You've tried to tell him, he's choosing not to hear.Most likely he will continue to resist. Listen to your instincts. If you find yourself getting very anxious to push the issue then do take take that seriously and do take advice (friends, family, legal). Don't move out of your home without first getting legal advice. These situations can be very difficult but they always get resolved in the end. You'll find a way to make it happen
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