WTF is wrong with me

Eponine7

I'm not really looking for answers...this is more of a vent. But if you have any words of wisdom or support, please feel free to share!

Last night I had a binge (on Cheez Its and Tootsie Rolls of all things...nice...sometimes I think weight loss would be so much easier if I didn't let the kids have any junk food in the house but I don't know if that's fair). The good news is that I logged it all. The bad news is that it still happens once every couple of weeks...I keep thinking I am finally beyond it all...and then it happens again.

I've been at this weight loss journey for almost 3 years and I'm down about 65 lbs--struggling, struggling, struggling to get the last 30 lbs. off. I exercise hard 5-6 days a week, including strength training. I have learned so much about myself, nutrition, behavior changes, triggers, etc...and yet I still have these periodic binges. WTF is wrong with me?? It's like I sabotage myself and I have no idea why.

I examine myself for emotional triggers, psych factors, etc...can't see a pattern. It is just SO D*MN FRUSTRATING.

Okay, vent over. Thanks for listening...

Escarda

Maybe you would just like to taste the food?
Alot of the time i find myself eating just because i want to taste it.

charliedavisxxx

i think all of us feel this way sometimes. you arent alone.
have you thought about maybe having one treat a day to you dont feel deprived enough to want to binge.
if it helps you've been very successful at this weightloss thing thus far so you shouldnt view it as 'sabotage' just a blip in your progess.

Best of luck! xx

dalmiechick45

hang in there, it's OK to cheat every once in a while... everyone does.... don't beat yourself up, you're doing great 65lbs is CERTAINLY a great accomplishment.

Ohh-- and I think its very fair to not have junk food around... I wish my mom had limited my consumption of it

ZugTheMegasaurus

Even if it is just venting, I'll still answer your question: there's nothing wrong with you. You've lost a ton of weight, exercise most days out of the week, and even make yourself accountable for the unhealthy foods. That's good. So every so often you're not perfect. That doesn't mean something is wrong with you. Maybe one of these days you'll figure out how to stay away from Cheez Its and Tootsie Rolls altogether, but the fact you haven't seen that day yet doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you.

I wrote this post for this kind of problem (I just prefer to give the link so people don't get sick of me copy/pasting the whole thing), please give it a read: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/578928-give-yourself-a-chance

eganita

I had a bad week where I just kept reaching for bad foods. I just need to remind myself that I feel my best (both physically and emotionally) when I eat foods that are good for my body. When I splurge too many days in a row, I feel bad about myself and guilty about what I've eaten.

I think it's important to enjoy life, and for me, great food (unfortunately, this does mean unhealthy foods some of the time..) brings a lot of joy for me. In the upcoming week, I am just going to remind myself about how I felt when I ate badly this past week. When I generally eat healthy and stay in my calorie goals, I really enjoy (and don't feel guilty at all) a splurge here and there (say one "bad" day or two semi-unhealthy meals throughout the week). Just know, you are not alone!

kitkatwag

It happens to me on a regular basis. I have spent my recent weight loss journey taking 2 steps forward and 1 step back. The fact that you are logging it is great, so then you know how often you are having the binges. AND you are exercising allot! That too is fantastic. Keep moving girl we can all do it

Tandi_S

You definitely are not alone! It IS frustrating. The fact that you logged it all is a testament to your dedication!

Congratulations on your success so far! That is a great achievement!

We're all human and are here to enjoy life. I don't think you sabotaged anything as charlie said above. Give yourself a break and some credit for hor far you've come!

Erinsiewert

Good to vent sometimes. Don't beat yourself up too much over this. 3 years of dedication and 63 pounds of weight loss is a remarkable accomplishment!! Everybody slips sometimes- it's what you do AFTER the slip that counts. Keep doing what you know works and thanks for being an inspiration to those of us at the beginning of the weight loss journey.

And Cheezits have knocked me off the wagon too Damn their cheezy goodness!!! Good luck to you

taraatwood

You justified having Cheez Its and Tootsie Rolls because your kids need the junk food. Your kids DO NOT need junk food. What's not fair is that you haven't found healthy alternatives that they could love too. You are setting them up for bad eating habits by having foods like this in the house. So not only are you allowing trigger foods that set you off / but you are allowing yourself to give harmful food to your kids.

Instead of Cheez It's and Tootsie Rolls why don't you find other healthy snack alternatives that you and your family can enjoy. Natural / Organic ones that do not have preservatives and are processed junk.

Once you get the junk out of your house you will have less of a binge issue.

Hell, if I had pizza sitting around my house 7 days a week you'd bet your *kitten* I'd be eating it or wanting to. But I choose not to have it in front of me because i'll want to eat it.

My househould does not have that junk. People love snacks, but I will make a healthy brownie. And i cook the brownies in muffin pans so that they are already measured out and i know i can have one... and if i'm really feeling hungry i'll have two. I make my brownies with yogurt or apple sauce and NOT butter / oils / eggs.

You need to stop telling yourself you are struggling struggling struggling. Same old story you are telling yourself. Move on. Be someone different. Be strong. Be happy with your progress. Stop complaining about your failures!!!

good luck.

sma83

Ive only been at this for about 3 months, but I do the same thing. For me it's not having stuff in the house, it's when I go out to eat. Even if I plan ahead I have the hardest time sticking to the healthier choices and watching portion size. I tell myself everytime I go out that I wont do it this time, but I usually do. I think there is a lot of mental and emotional factors with losing weight. Ive been big most of my life. Sometimes Im scared of losing the weight. I want to lose the weight and I want to be healthy. But sometimes there is just this insane mental struggle. We just got to keep pushing thru. Good luck to you! :flowerforyou:

robzison

No words of wisdom - just commiseration. I could have written your post (except Cheez-Its and Tootsie Rolls are replaced by chips and donuts in my case). I am 80 lbs down from my start, have been 30 less than now in 2010, and want to lose another 50. I lost all my weight in 2010, gained some back in 2011, and seem to just be hovering at this weight (down 30 from my 2011 high). I'll be perfect food wise for 3 or 4 days, then usually on the weekend, I will eat foods I shouldn't (eating out, etc) and will see my scale numbers climb 5 pounds before settling down where I was the week before! I know how frustrating it is! I am making good progress again - the only thing I can suggest is what works for me - trying again and again until it works out...

Dremak1

Just a thought....Perhaps you are depriving yourself too much. Maybe you could set aside one meal a week when you allow yourself a (1) small treat of some sort. Perhaps - small portion of Red Mango frozen yougurt with a squirt of chocolate sauce or just some fruit on top. That way you perhaps you wont feel the need to binge.

CynthiaCollin

I think its normal. We have our ups and downs....it is what is is.... but it is what you do the next day that counts. This week I binged on Herseys Kisses....I told myself I would only eat a few and I ate alot.... so many I lost count....lol.... Now at least my craving for chocolate is over and I can move on and focus on doing what`s right for me. In the year and a half I have worked to lose weight I had my struggles, but never ever gave up and today I am finally where I want to be. Now I must learn to maintain and not gain....which is an other challenge in itself. I had my chocolate binge this week....the rest of the week I will do better....and in a few weeks from now I have some intense cravings.... I will listen to my body, give it what it craves and move on.

Nothing is wrong with you....you are a human being. Weight loss is hard and you have come so far. Don`t get discouraged....just keep pushing on !!!

worldgirl28

Nothing is wrong with you - you're human. And congratulations on losing 65 pounds! That's awesome!! Binges happen and its like a drug addict or alcoholic having a binge: you just get out-of-control and don't realize what you've done until its over and you're left feeling like yuck. Its truly difficult but good for you for logging it! I don't know if I would have the courage to do that same.

When you wrote about kicking junk food out of the house but that not being fair to the kids that is something that really stuck out to me. Growing up, my mom struggled constantly with her weight and was on every diet known to man but she didn't change our eating habits. We were still allowed to eat pudding, chips, soda, etc., and even in small portions those are not good for growing bodies. My only advice would be to toss the junk food. It's not being unfair to your children at all; in fact, I think it would be a gift to them to slowly introduce alternative snacks rather than the super processed stuff that's on most pantry shelves. I only suggest this because, from my own experience, its something I wish my mom had done.

taraatwood

i think all of us feel this way sometimes. you arent alone.
have you thought about maybe having one treat a day to you dont feel deprived enough to want to binge.
if it helps you've been very successful at this weightloss thing thus far so you shouldnt view it as 'sabotage' just a blip in your progess.

Best of luck! xx

Agree - you should plan your cheat meal. This way you feel in control and you know what the cheat will be. Say once a week or twice a week i will treat myself to this and NOT feel guilty and eat in moderation.

sathor

nothing. we all have our binges. For me, I will have a 1500 Calorie lunch. (Then I will have a 12 mile bike race before dinner.) (Every Thursday is like that for lunch, sadly the races are only once per month)

How much cushion do you even have in your weight loss? For example, I ran my body fat % this morning, and learned that a goal of 175 is no longer really feasable. (well, it would leave me at 6.1% body fat, bordering on 'not enough', and I believe my core weight should go up between then and now)

Captain_Tightpants

You're human.

LiddyBit

First, love your screen name

Second, overcoming a tendency to binge is HARD. I think it is huge progress that you log it and are thinking about what is making it happen, why, how to avoid it, etc. I really would encourage you to see a counselor if you aren't. People think you have to fit a certain stereotype to need help with a disordered eating habit but this clearly affects your life.

You know what else? Your kids absolutely DO NOT need that stuff in the house. You are their mom and if you want to say, "Sorry everyone, only healthy snacks allowed at home," that does not exactly constitute poor parenting, KWIM?

bekahcr812

I have the kid problem too. But I find that not having the junk in the house is the only way for me not to eat it. I figure my daughter should be eating healthier snacks too. But I don't completely deprive myself either. Like with the Easter candy recently, my daughter loves getting the candy but doesn't necessarily end up eating most of it. I'll usually take the rest to work, but I found out 2 of the little Hershey's chocolate eggs are only 57 calories, so if I was under my weight goal for the day, I allowed myself to have 2 to help my sweet tooth. I let them melt in my mouth instead of chewing them up quickly. It was actually nice to not feel like I completely blew everything over a little chocolate. Complete deprivation ensures failure. Allow yourself a little bit as a treat instead of depriving yourself and then binging. You're doing great! Don't let the frustration get to you.

neverstray

For me the battle exists in TV and/or boredom.

Also, if I drink, I like to have a couple of glasses of wine at night, it lowers my inhibitions just enough to where there's danger that I might raid my cupboards.

My solution is try to not get bored.
Try to not sit in front of the TV too much. If I do, make sure I'm engaged and im not just staring at It, like a moth to a flame.
Do not buy that kind of munchy crunchy food.

I actually have completely stopped buying crap food. So, even if I really really crave it, it's not there. So, there is zero chance of me eating it.

Simple solutions.

Amymarie19715

I understand what your saying because I have been there. First of all I would not have junk food in the house. If you do want to buy treats for your kids buy treats that you dont like. It may seem unfair to not buy treats for them but really its important for our kids to eat healthy to. Second how about allowing yourself one day a week to have a treat. If its planned you are able to have a treat but control when and how much and that might make you feel better. I was also told by someone else that she had this urge to eat alot every night and she didnt knoiw why. She cut down on her carbs and that helped her. I hope this helps you!

KellyBurton1

Maybe you would just like to taste the food?
Alot of the time i find myself eating just because i want to taste it.

So very true! I think it has to do with our tastebuds. They are just lookin for something really good to spark and say surprise. But in the end we get disappointed cause there was no fireworks and we keep eating to get that satisfaction.

Your not alone!

Buddhasmiracle

The more you beat yourself down the harder it is to pick yourself up.

All the posts above are positive affirmations that it is not unusual to have one plus of those days.

If you are concerned about this behavior, ban those types of food from your home, fair or unfair to your kids. They'll survive.


You are a success story. Don't knock it.

Jenni268

My househould does not have that junk. People love snacks, but I will make a healthy brownie. And i cook the brownies in muffin pans so that they are already measured out and i know i can have one... and if i'm really feeling hungry i'll have two. I make my brownies with yogurt or apple sauce and NOT butter / oils / eggs.

I'm not trying to hijack, but I'm interested in this recipe! I've been slowly adapting my children's diet to be more healthful. It was never shockingly bad before, but I am always looking for ways to help them develop good habits.

Would you mind sharing this recipe or telling me where I could find it?! THANKS SO MUCH! :flowerforyou:

vypeters

Some triggers can be simple. Boredom and loneliness are two big triggers for me. Also seeing and smelling certain foods. I am not one to believe in never having any "bad" food ever again, but for those of us who have over-eating issues serious enough to have been obese, there may be foods you simply cannot have in the house. At all.

Crackers. Cannot have crackers in the house. That may be a sign of weakness, but I'd rather acknowledge the weakness and act on it than ignore it and have cracker binges.

ashreynolds09

I think you should celebrate your progress! And instead of having a binge why not allow for yourself to have the treats during the day. I personally LOVE tootsie rolls, so I get the little tiny ones and I can have 13 for 140 calories. Yes there's still alot of sugar and yes that is more cals than my typical snack but it tastes good, satisfies my cravings and I move on from it!

ItsMeRebekah

"sometimes I think weight loss would be so much easier if I didn't let the kids have any junk food in the house but I don't know if that's fair"

of course its fair. they should eat healthy foods too! my kids snacks are things like applesauce and crackers. dad gets oreos and stuff like that every now and again and the kids will have some but def dont buy stuff like that every week and they never even ask for it anymore! they want good stuff like fruits and cheese now for their snacks. i say replace it with healthy snacks and you can start to feel like you struggle less because its not readily handy in the house.

ninerbuff

Personally I "cheat" everyday. There's always something in my daily regimen that's "junk", but that's in conjunction with all the "good" stuff I eat. For instance yesterday it was a large Mango Frutista from Taco Bell. Today, it will probably be a small bag of chips with my sandwich for lunch.
I've found that if I "cheat" everyday, I never feel deprived and binges don't usually happen..........................unless of course you throw chocolate covered almonds in front of me! Other than that, it's okay to eat some "bad" food as long as you account for the calories.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

xarla16

I completely get the bingeing problem, I always ate relatively healthy except for when I ate treats and it was like I just couldn't stop eating them when I started. Now I portion little bits out for myself. What I have been doing is after super if I have 100 calories or so left over I have a treat, but I do the math and make sure it is exactly the same as how many calories I have left for the day. I know this is easier said than done sometimes, but if I don't let myself have little treats on a regular basis, I will sit down and eat a huge bag of candy, or a pack of licorice. I have learned I can't deprive myself of anything, I just have to learn to eat it in moderation. Something I also do is eat slower. I have learned that if I pay attention to tasting treats, then I realize that generally it's the first few bites that are the very best. If you're conscious about the calories in it, I find it makes it harder to binge.

dansls1

Keep in mind a small indulgence in something tastey is not cheating, it's choosing to nourish your mental health

I posted that on my status yesterday. Sounds like something you could do a little more often to prevent a 'binge' - just a small treat here and there to keep you sane and on point the majority of the time.

Good luck