Should I seek professional HELP?!?

Options
135

Replies

  • LadyGreatrick
    LadyGreatrick Posts: 18
    Options
    I worked in mental health for a long time and there is no shame in getting help and a professional would never not take you seriously. The bravest and most "in control" people I know are the ones that went and got help.

    I'm so impressed with you for starting this thread! Are you close enough to you mother to ask for help?

    Think of it this way as well, the sooner you get this under control and get help the sooner you'll be able to work towards the body you REALLY want. Not a skeleton, but a fit young women. You recognise there is a problem, sort it out now before it ruins your 20's. You wanna enjoy your 20's right?! You can do it girl.
  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
    Options

    Yes, that's me.... I know it's not fat...but I also know I'm not happy with how it looks... It keeps me kinda motivated...

    As an aside: You're not making it look better by doing what you are doing, and I'm not just saying this because you're exhibiting ED behavior. ED issues completely aside, improving your body composition would best be done by lifting weights and eating close to maintenance calories. Eating at an extreme deficit is not helping things in your case.
  • misty0413
    misty0413 Posts: 212
    Options
    You need the help before your habits get worse. Purging is terrible idea the smomach acids ruin your teeth. I work for an oral surgeon.
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
    Options
    If you continue to purge, your teeth will rot out and you'll have stinky breath all the time and problems with your esophagus (acid reflux). Taking laxitives when you aren't actually constipated can result in screwing up your digestive system and other organs.

    What good will a thin body do you if the rest of you is a gross mess that nobody wants to come close to?

    I'm not trying to sound mean..just want to get through to you. It sounds like you know the answer to your question..please get some help! Best of luck to you!
  • pitbulllover
    pitbulllover Posts: 98 Member
    Options
    You ARE skinny!! Don't compare your weight to someone a foot shorter than you. You're 2 pounds away from being officially "underweight" on the BMI scale (not that I believe in the accuracy of the BMI scale, but that's a different topic). Point being, you are FAR smaller than average, and the way you see yourself is not how the rest of the world sees you. That's part of your ED as well.

    So if it makes you feel better, you did not fail at getting skinny. Now don't fail at getting healthy either! Talk to your mom. Luckily, you're young and still healthy and you probably haven't done any damage (yet).
  • Navotc
    Navotc Posts: 97
    Options
    Please do seek help, and you are a SUCCESS for knowing that this might be a good move. Having fears about weight and eating and the balance of it is something many people struggle with. It doesn't mean you're a failure, any more than a kid who is learning to walk and falls down is a failure. They just need support until they can move forward on their own, and so do you. :)

    I saw online that the International Association of Eating Disorder Professionals has a directory where you can find a specialist in your own area. That way it won't be just a nutritionist or a psychologist, but someone who knows how these topics interact. Also, the Emily Program is known for helping people with eating disorders.

    Here are the two links I found online. One is to the directory, and the other is to the Emily Program. Be well, and be proud of yourself for seeking assistance!

    http://web.memberclicks.com/mc/directory/viewsimplesearch.do?orgId=iaedp
    http://www.emilyprogram.com/

    Please, please, make this investment in YOU!
  • myfitnessnmhoy
    myfitnessnmhoy Posts: 2,105 Member
    Options
    If you have to ask, you probably already know the answer. Get some help, you'll feel much better after you do. Are you nervous to go get some help? You won't necessarily end up in the hospital, but you will get the help you need to be healthy!

    I feel like I'm not skinny enough to have an ED and that I'm just a poser...
    I keep telling myself I'm fine and that I shouldn't be such a wimp

    No, you can still have an eating disorder. You've just allowed yourself the valuable opportunity to catch it before it started screwing up your health. Seize the opportunity. Now.

    And that little voice you're talking about? It's probably your eating disorder trying to take over.
  • HauteP1nk
    HauteP1nk Posts: 2,139 Member
    Options
    Yes. Get help before it escalates.
  • cgg22
    cgg22 Posts: 1
    Options
    You need professional help. You'll be taught to have a healthy relationship with food...not an all or nothing relationship. It's not about being weak or being a "failure". It's about LIVING! You're probably already aware of the dangers but eating disorders destroy your organs & will, eventually, cause them to shut down. I'm sure that you're a beautiful girl who has so much living to do. Please don't be afraid to do the right thing! Wishing you well!!!
  • NatasPV
    NatasPV Posts: 17
    Options
    First of all I wanna thank you all SO MUCH for replying. I'm happy I started this thread.

    Second I gotta tell you another part of my problem: I'm an exchange student. I'm momentarely doing Senior Year in High School and I live with a host family. This also makes me afraid of what will happen when I would seek help.. because I don't wanna go home before then end of the program. I don't wanna tell my hostmom either, because I'm afraid she won't understand or will not wanna deal with it and that I have to go home.
    I saw my own mom for 2 weeks over Spring Break wen she came to visit me. I gave lots of hints and talked oenly about my thoughts and views. Since she is specialized in treating Eating Disorders I tought she would be right on it... talking me out if it. But she didn't.. She did ask a lot about my eating habits and my views on my own body, but she didn't do anything like "talking me out of it" or anything..she seemed more..observant. Of course I don't know if that's maybe the best way to treat a person with an ED (you know..not getting on their back) but for me... well... let's say I expected more, also because she's my mom of course.

    I'm sorry I replied so late, I'm at a Track and Field meet ATM.
    I would really appreciate anyone replying to the further information I just wrote down...
  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
    Options
    First of all I wanna thank you all SO MUCH for replying. I'm happy I started this thread.

    Second I gotta tell you another part of my problem: I'm an exchange student. I'm momentarely doing Senior Year in High School and I live with a host family. This also makes me afraid of what will happen when I would seek help.. because I don't wanna go home before then end of the program. I don't wanna tell my hostmom either, because I'm afraid she won't understand or will not wanna deal with it and that I have to go home.
    I saw my own mom for 2 weeks over Spring Break wen she came to visit me. I gave lots of hints and talked oenly about my thoughts and views. Since she is specialized in treating Eating Disorders I tought she would be right on it... talking me out if it. But she didn't.. She did ask a lot about my eating habits and my views on my own body, but she didn't do anything like "talking me out of it" or anything..she seemed more..observant. Of course I don't know if that's maybe the best way to treat a person with an ED (you know..not getting on their back) but for me... well... let's say I expected more, also because she's my mom of course.

    I'm sorry I replied so late, I'm at a Track and Field meet ATM.
    I would really appreciate anyone replying to the further information I just wrote down...

    You might not like my tone, but get your priorities straight. You are putting your body in danger, period. End of Story. Fixing this is more important than any of the stuff you just listed, by a big margin.
    Get help, now.
  • Tzippy7
    Tzippy7 Posts: 344 Member
    Options
    If you have to ask, you probably already know the answer. Get some help, you'll feel much better after you do. Are you nervous to go get some help? You won't necessarily end up in the hospital, but you will get the help you need to be healthy!

    I feel like I'm not skinny enough to have an ED and that I'm just a poser...
    I keep telling myself I'm fine and that I shouldn't be such a wimp

    people of any and all sizes have eating disorders. This is hard to imagine, and its why so many people with ed dont think its a problem. typically people who purge and demonstrate signs of bulimia are at a "normal" weight. You should get help while you still have some desire to because that will change the further into this you go. trust me i have been through this.
  • seekingstrengthX2
    seekingstrengthX2 Posts: 771
    Options
    First of all I wanna thank you all SO MUCH for replying. I'm happy I started this thread.

    Second I gotta tell you another part of my problem: I'm an exchange student. I'm momentarely doing Senior Year in High School and I live with a host family. This also makes me afraid of what will happen when I would seek help.. because I don't wanna go home before then end of the program. I don't wanna tell my hostmom either, because I'm afraid she won't understand or will not wanna deal with it and that I have to go home.
    I saw my own mom for 2 weeks over Spring Break wen she came to visit me. I gave lots of hints and talked oenly about my thoughts and views. Since she is specialized in treating Eating Disorders I tought she would be right on it... talking me out if it. But she didn't.. She did ask a lot about my eating habits and my views on my own body, but she didn't do anything like "talking me out of it" or anything..she seemed more..observant. Of course I don't know if that's maybe the best way to treat a person with an ED (you know..not getting on their back) but for me... well... let's say I expected more, also because she's my mom of course.

    I'm sorry I replied so late, I'm at a Track and Field meet ATM.
    I would really appreciate anyone replying to the further information I just wrote down...



    You can't "talk someone out" of having an eating disorder. It takes a lot of therapy usually. Pushing someone and trying to force them to "snap out of it" never works. Your Mom is probably well aware of what is going on.
  • NatasPV
    NatasPV Posts: 17
    Options
    First of all I wanna thank you all SO MUCH for replying. I'm happy I started this thread.

    Second I gotta tell you another part of my problem: I'm an exchange student. I'm momentarely doing Senior Year in High School and I live with a host family. This also makes me afraid of what will happen when I would seek help.. because I don't wanna go home before then end of the program. I don't wanna tell my hostmom either, because I'm afraid she won't understand or will not wanna deal with it and that I have to go home.
    I saw my own mom for 2 weeks over Spring Break wen she came to visit me. I gave lots of hints and talked oenly about my thoughts and views. Since she is specialized in treating Eating Disorders I tought she would be right on it... talking me out if it. But she didn't.. She did ask a lot about my eating habits and my views on my own body, but she didn't do anything like "talking me out of it" or anything..she seemed more..observant. Of course I don't know if that's maybe the best way to treat a person with an ED (you know..not getting on their back) but for me... well... let's say I expected more, also because she's my mom of course.

    I'm sorry I replied so late, I'm at a Track and Field meet ATM.
    I would really appreciate anyone replying to the further information I just wrote down...

    You might not like my tone, but get your priorities straight. You are putting your body in danger, period. End of Story. Fixing this is more important than any of the stuff you just listed, by a big margin.
    Get help, now.

    So you thing 2 more month on 600-800 kcal will get to me?m Are there other people who eat way less than that?
    Ughh... Like I said.. sometimes I feel like such a poser >.<
  • Rowanana
    Rowanana Posts: 14 Member
    Options
    Just because other people have 'worse' cases of ED doesn't mean you don't have one, and definitely doesn't mean you should aspire to become like them before you seek help. I used that faulty line of reasoning with depression for a long time before I sought help and now I really wish I'd snapped out of it sooner. You know you have a problem. You don't need to compare your problem to anyone else's problem. Mental illness is not a game of top trumps. You deserve help. Get it.

    I get the living situation being tough as an exchange student, though. I don't know where you're on exchange but some countries have more or less stigma for this kind of thing which can make it rough, not to mention how hard it is to start seeing a therapist and then having to start all over when you go home in 2 months. I still think it's a good idea to try because your health is very important, but if you really feel THAT uncomfortable seeking help while you're with a host mom, try looking for other options. Your school might offer confidential counselling. Failing that, you can try and make progress on your own. This is way easier said than done of course, and will be slower and more painful than if you can get professional help, but it's better than doing nothing for the next 2 months. Do some research on how therapy for eating disorders work and see if you can try applying some of that yourself. Ask your mom about techniques she uses-- frame it as curiosity about her job if that'd make you more comfortable, though I bet she already knows what's going on.

    But yeah. You need help. If not now, then definitely when you get home, and if you can't get professional help RIGHT NOW then you need to at least do everything you can on your own to start feeling better. And again, for emphasis, because this is IMPORTANT: the fact that other people have it 'worse' DOES NOT change the fact that you deserve to be happy.

    I hope it goes ok for you and you can get better. And good luck at the track meet!
  • reneegee23
    reneegee23 Posts: 233 Member
    Options
    Yes.
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    Options
    I feel like I'm not skinny enough to have an ED and that I'm just a poser...
    I keep telling myself I'm fine and that I shouldn't be such a wimp

    And I wasn't as sad as some people with depression, but that didn't mean I didn't have depression and shouldn't have sought treatment for it.

    Sometimes we need help. Take it. :smile: For my depression, and I'm pretty sure EDs are similar, I described it like someone who needs eyeglasses. People with bad vision can't see clearly. People with depression don't "see" the world clearly, but instead of things being blurry or out of focus, they see situations as being insurmountable. Everything seemed harder, darker and just plain worse than it really was. And I'm guessing that people with eating disorders don't see themselves or their relationship with food clearly.

    You wouldn't tell someone who can't read an eyechart that they're being a wimp, that they should just suck it up and deal with it. They can't. And a mental/emotional problem is no different than a physical one. When you need help, you should get it. :smile: You deserve to be happy.
  • suziblues2000
    suziblues2000 Posts: 515 Member
    Options
    Professional help will teach you how to eat and more importantly how to love yourself! It IS possible to be happy and love food and your body all at the same time!! Really!
  • NatasPV
    NatasPV Posts: 17
    Options
    I get the living situation being tough as an exchange student, though. I don't know where you're on exchange but some countries have more or less stigma for this kind of thing which can make it rough, not to mention how hard it is to start seeing a therapist and then having to start all over when you go home in 2 months.

    Bumping this up since I just got home from my Track Meet.

    I'm staying IN the USA and I am from The Netherlands... I do have to tell you, coming hear was a great experience, but it has also been the worst year for my self esteem. Everything in America is about dieting, calories and being perfect.....
  • megsmom2
    megsmom2 Posts: 2,362 Member
    Options
    Please get some help. You are obsessing about "skinny" and divorcing yourself from "healthy"...which is where you ought to be. Please. We lose too many beautiful young people to EDs...I don't want to lose you too.

Categories