In you opinion, can men and woman every be JUST friends

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  • ChrisStoney
    ChrisStoney Posts: 479 Member
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    I am friends with .... last count... 20 women... it could be more.... I am not attracted to any of them. Never dated one of them ether...

    I feel bad that they can remember my name all the time, and I have trouble remembering theirs, if we haven't spoken in a few months...

    Sounds like really deep friendships, LOL If you are considering that as your basis of friendship, then most guys would have hundreds..... I think the OP meant female friends that you keep in contact with and share intimate details of your life with......
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,887 Member
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    This may cause some anger but, is it possible that when a woman says she "gets along so great with guys" or she "really gets along with guys" and that she doesn't like girls, what she REALLY means is...

    That she loves the attention?

    Just a thought.
    I'm one of those people who says I get along great with guys and am not usually as comfortable around women.

    Yes, the attention probably has something to do with it, but women are much more critical of one another than men are. I can be myself around men more easily without having to worry so much about offending them or inadvertently hurting their feelings and, because men are more solution and logic oriented, it's easier to fix a problem if one of us DOES do something screwed up.
  • iva001
    iva001 Posts: 162
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    This may cause some anger but, is it possible that when a woman says she "gets along so great with guys" or she "really gets along with guys" and that she doesn't like girls, what she REALLY means is...

    That she loves the attention?

    Just a thought.

    I agree. I love my male friends and female friends equally. They both bring different things to my life.
  • iva001
    iva001 Posts: 162
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    Ok, I have a few very good male friends. I was an economics major so there were not alot of girls in my class and I ended up having mostly male friends.

    So one of the guys and I hit it off very well. Laughing joking, going to lunch, watching tv etc. I would invite him over to my house for dinner and we would watch movies. EVERYONE says men and women cannot be friends so I was kinda waiting for him to come on to me. Sure he made dirty jokes all the time but I made them right back.

    So one day I confronted him, told him I thought he liked me and thought he was gonna ask me out. He said " well, on paper we would make a good couple but in real life I just don't have those feelings".

    Its so confusing!!! According to a lot of men out there, all my guys friends secretly want to hook up with me, but they are obviously wrong.

    All of you guys who say men and women cannot be good friends, can you explain this? He tells me I'm pretty so I know he finds me physically attractive.

    Also, I don't know why I am sweating this because I only want to be friends with him. But when everyone says my friends are secretly attracted to me, it gets me wondering what's in my friends' heads...
  • interceptor311
    interceptor311 Posts: 980 Member
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    My two best friends are women. I wouldn't trade them for the world and there has NEVER been anything more than a platonic friendship.....and yes, they are hot lol
  • TadaGanIarracht
    TadaGanIarracht Posts: 2,615 Member
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    Acquaintances, yes. Friendly, yes. Friends, close friends, best friends, depends on the persons involved.
  • Natx83
    Natx83 Posts: 1,308 Member
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    If you are a girl and you have a male friend, he has thought about having sex with you at the very least.

    It's possible to maintain friendships, I've got some good friends that are girls, I wouldn't say best friends, I've shared a bed, we've spooned but it'd never been anything more, there is no discussion required about it as it'd just never going to happen..

    That video is 1000% true
  • iva001
    iva001 Posts: 162
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    Yes they can - I have a few male friends I've known since school.

    There was once a male friend of mine that I actually fell for...and stupidly told him. Let's just say it ruined our friendship. He was upset I ever mentioned it and confided in another friend that he thought it was nice to have had a female friend he'd been do close to without the ties....I will forever regret that night. :-(

    Otherwise, I certainly think you can. I also think you can look at male friends in a different light at different stages/circumstances of your life.

    Sometimes male/female friendships are just as hard work as "couple" relationships.....or it seemed like that to me in previous years.


    That's unfortunate...my friends can confess ANYTHING to me and I won't make them feel weird or bad about it. My friend and I kissed one night, have no idea why, a sudden mutual attraction we acted on, and we did not enjoy emotionally or physically. We laughed it off and never mentioned it. Nothing at all changed between us.

    So stop kicking yourself...he should have been more mature about it. Also if you never asked him out you never would have known what his answer would have been....
  • AshCakes88
    AshCakes88 Posts: 131 Member
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    It is possible to be just friends but you can't help who you fall for.
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
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    yes, absolutely. I've known my male best friend for 25 years and would be lost without him :bigsmile: Where all lovers have failed me, he is always there to support me and listen to my whining......:laugh:
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    I think it's dependent on a variable of factors.

    And possible, but hard.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
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    For some reason, I have more male friends than female friends. I interact better with men for some reason.

    Me too!
  • threnners
    threnners Posts: 175 Member
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    Yes. I've had my man friend for 20 years now.
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    This may cause some anger but, is it possible that when a woman says she "gets along so great with guys" or she "really gets along with guys" and that she doesn't like girls, what she REALLY means is...

    That she loves the attention?

    Just a thought.

    Depends on the woman.
  • FitSuga
    FitSuga Posts: 262 Member
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    This may cause some anger but, is it possible that when a woman says she "gets along so great with guys" or she "really gets along with guys" and that she doesn't like girls, what she REALLY means is...

    That she loves the attention?

    Just a thought.
    Maybe for some but just because some women say that doesn't mean that is what they are after. I was a tomboy growing up. I always hung out with my brother and his friends because they were flat out more fun! We could play games, ride bikes, melt crap in the microwave, not any of this drama/gossip stuff most girls I knew did which only got worse with age. I think if a person can't handle being friends with the opposite sex then they just need to mature more. Believe it or not men and women can have common interests and grow to have a friendship in a respectful way. Even now, many women I know just don't have the same interests I do unless it has to do with kids and I'm more than that. Should I have to be friends with women only even if we have little to nothing in common? I think not.

    If you can't handle being friends with the opposite gender, then don't, if you can,then by all means.
  • delilah47
    delilah47 Posts: 1,658
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    In my 64 years, I have had but a handful of true female friends, most of which ended after them betraying my trust; usually betrayal of confidences, but a few hitting on my boyfriends behind my back, etc. I do not forgive people for these types of character flaws. An honest, unwitting, mistake, maybe so. In the past 30 years or so, all of my "good" friends are men. Thanks guys, for being able to hold a confidence, for not being judgmental, and for being there when I need you without implying I owe you something.

    I am very selective when it comes to real life friends, but if I choose you as my friend, I will always be there for you.
  • scinamon1
    scinamon1 Posts: 158 Member
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    I sure hope girls and boys can be just friends, because most of my best friends are boys. In my 'friendship group' there are 9 boys and 2 girls including me.

    Although at the end of last term one o them did say to me that he had one friend who was a girl (who we teased him about a bit, I'll admit) who he was just friends with, and that he thought they had an unusual relationship in that neither of them had sexual feelings towards her, and he thought that that was unique....
  • whitehandlady
    whitehandlady Posts: 459 Member
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    can't speak to this universally....but hell no....lol

    not indefinitely anyway....if there is attraction....the possibility for "something more" is always there ;)
  • wbgolden
    wbgolden Posts: 2,071 Member
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    can't speak to this universally....but hell no....lol

    not indefinitely anyway....if there is attraction....the possibility for "something more" is always there ;)
    this lady is smart. listen to her.
  • whitehandlady
    whitehandlady Posts: 459 Member
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    can't speak to this universally....but hell no....lol

    not indefinitely anyway....if there is attraction....the possibility for "something more" is always there ;)
    this lady is smart. listen to her.

    :bigsmile:

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