Successful showoffs??Sick and tired of this.

vjrose

If a person has been successful I have to agree the friends list over time gets too long. Mine is at 57 and I struggle to find enough time to keep up with all of them. If a person has a life beyond MFP then it becomes a struggle to combine a caring, sharing personality with reaching out to the newer folks. When I started a bunch of folks near the beginning and I joined up together and just fished and fussed around till we each found the right plan and we are progressing downward together. I have folks on my list from the beginning and many scattered along the timeline as folks have wandered off and new have arrived. If there is a particular person you are targeting for help, send them a pm and if they don't answer find another example. Someone will answer your pm's eventually and you will have found the help and advice hopefully you need.

fitpilatesqueen

Good answer. I agree with you and the last bit is so true

Bethie_B

Why are there so many people on here that have lost weight, and succeeded, who act like they are big shots? They feel like they are so much better than everyone else. They decline friend requests, they're so rude, and when you ask them questions for help they ignore you. I am so sick and tired of these show-offs. Congratulations for your success, but seriously stop acting like you can step all over everyone else. If i ever reach my goal, I will make sure to help out anyone that needs me, but I cant say the same for everyone else.:huh:

Your post really sounds more like jealousy than being offended by "rudeness". Instead of seeing other people's success as a personal slight against you, how about you use it a motivation to be as successful as they are? Every person on MFP who has had success is inspiring! Of course, if whining burns that many calories... as you were.

rima933

Why are there so many people on here that have lost weight, and succeeded, who act like they are big shots? They feel like they are so much better than everyone else. They decline friend requests, they're so rude, and when you ask them questions for help they ignore you. I am so sick and tired of these show-offs. Congratulations for your success, but seriously stop acting like you can step all over everyone else. If i ever reach my goal, I will make sure to help out anyone that needs me, but I cant say the same for everyone else.:huh:

Your post really sounds more like jealousy than being offended by "rudeness". Instead of seeing other people's success as a personal slight against you, how about you use it a motivation to be as successful as they are? Every person on MFP who has had success is inspiring! Of course, if whining burns that many calories... as you were.

If you read my comment on the other page and thorough explanation about why i posted this
thread, i gave specific examples of what I meant. I am not jealous. In fact, like i have posted in this forum several times, I enjoy the success stories. HOWEVER there was a specific set of people this was meant for. I find your comment quite demeaning actually. Next time if you want to write something like this, at least do your research before making such a bold demeaning accusation such as jealousy.

AddA2UDE

I think you may be looking in a mirror a bit and seeing a reflection of YOUR attitude. Or, maybe you are overly sensitive. Or........who know's. I've been here for close to a year, had a little success, still working on my goal, and haven't had ran into this "issue" even once.

tofubun

HTFU

stuffinmuffin

Well I hope people tell you to stuff off and shut up when (or IF) you reach your goals! Very glad you're not on my friends list.

Scott613

I see it as a challenge. If somebody can drop weight get all muscley and ripped. I can get bigger and more ripped. Some people have their own drive and don't need the Wtg or good job comments. When you get a ton of FR It's hard trying to keep up with people. If you don't interact with them what's the point of being friends anyway. Btw I know from experience show some skin and your FR get crazy! Put up an avatar without skin showing and your FR decline.:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

Cgirlish

I'm fairly new to the site. and the people I have sent friends request have been because I have read something froms topics, post or responses to other friends post ... I dont keep track of who I sent them to, but I am happy when I am accepted, and so far seem to have a growing list of people to inspire and motivate me

Connie

myofibril

Weight loss is not some magic cure for insecurity and generally not being a nice person. In fact it can make those issues worse and more visible.

I think it is undeniably true that some people will be insufferable when they reach their goals. I don't think it applies to the majority of people though.

There is a certain amount of fantasy people project onto the characters of people who succeed ~ the halo effect ~ which have no real bearing on who they really are as people. This brings added pressure.

It's tough being gorgeous......

like me.

Lady_Bane

I cant believe this thread is still going!
Its getting nasty and mean in here.
Make love not war guys! :P

wldlndcpt

"Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” -Marianne Williamson

Well said! We are at our best when we support each other unconditionally. I joined this site because the site I used before didn't have this type of support. Hold me accountable when I need it, but support my successes as well. We all need a little help along the way.

Learn not to read intent into someone's written words. You can't know what their "tone of voice" is by reading a post.

Sarauk2sf

Why are there so many people on here that have lost weight, and succeeded, who act like they are big shots? They feel like they are so much better than everyone else. They decline friend requests, they're so rude, and when you ask them questions for help they ignore you. I am so sick and tired of these show-offs. Congratulations for your success, but seriously stop acting like you can step all over everyone else. If i ever reach my goal, I will make sure to help out anyone that needs me, but I cant say the same for everyone else.:huh:

Ummm, how about because they are? Whether it was 5 lbs or 300 lbs, struggling with the mental and physical issues that come with excess weight is a huge challenge and if one reaches their goal; they've accomplished a huge feat in life by working hard and they DESERVE to flaunt it! Not only that, but for many here, it serves as encouragement, motivation, and help on our own journey.

As far as ignoring someone for help or declining request or being "rude", there could be a million reasons for it. MFP has many glitches; they've been fixing a ton of them all weekend. I can't tell you how many times I get a friend request or an e-mail that doesn't show up for days. Or, someone comments on my feed and I don't get notified of it right away and it's weeks later before I see it. At this very moment, I have a friend request that I've approved 4 times and yet I still have the notification bar pop up telling me that I have a friend request; it seems to be stuck in some kind of MFP friend limbo.

And some people just don't want to add any ole internet stranger to their friends list either; imagine wanting to get to know someone a little better before just letting them be your "friend." Now that's real uppity; the nerve! Good grief...please someone tell me that this topic doesn't really exist and that I'm delirious from too low a carb intake. BTW...should I be eating back my exercise calories? :laugh:

Seriously your arrogance is the number one reason that this topic was posted. Get off your high horse.

Really? Really? - There was absolutely nothing arrogant about that post.

- Why shouldn't people post pictues of their abs - they work damn hard for them
- I find the folks that are successful are incredibly helpful and motivating
- why should someone accept FRs if they do not want to. For example, I will not accept a FR if I do not believe we have aligned goals and will delete if I find out later we do not. I want to be able to support my friends and vice versa - not just collect them
- I am sure the folks with the success stories have a load of FRs and PMs a day - they do have jobs and lives to live and are not responsible for anyone elses success

You really need to not take these things so personally as they are not about you

Seriously, you should read my other comments on here to be updated on the original post before critisizing please.

Ironic really - I was responding to a post from you critisizing someone else - and the original post of yours critisizing a bunch of un-named peope.

I did read your other posts and what you said does not negate the validity of mine.

froeschli

It's the internet. get over it. (oops, was that mean, it's so easy on a forum )

bottom line, people are taking online groups and friends way too seriously. if one got upset over every real person not walking up to them and wanting to be friends right away, one would be a real headcase.

gigiangelique

Its the INTERNET who cares

jenkinsdeb

I have been on mfp for 3-4 months and have never experienced anything like this before, to me you sound like your a deperessed negitave person!!!! And every day I read someone else's sucess story as I find them very motivationg.

Are you optermistic or pesamistic??

jfan175

This thread boils down to: "Fatty Patty became Skinny Minnie and bragged about it in a weight loss forum and won't be my FP friend."

ironanimal

This thread boils down to: "Fatty Patty became Skinny Minnie and bragged about it in a weight loss forum and won't be my FP friend."

:laugh: Good summary.

Di3012

Why are there so many people on here that have lost weight, and succeeded, who act like they are big shots? They feel like they are so much better than everyone else. They decline friend requests, they're so rude, and when you ask them questions for help they ignore you. I am so sick and tired of these show-offs. Congratulations for your success, but seriously stop acting like you can step all over everyone else. If i ever reach my goal, I will make sure to help out anyone that needs me, but I cant say the same for everyone else.:huh:

Most likely because they have worked damned hard to lose their weight and get into shape, that's why.

Regarding declining friend requests, that is totally up to them who they accept or decline, as it is also your privilege to do the same, as you do too.

Personally, I have not had any such experience on MFP as you so describe, the only thing I have had is being declined as a friend - but so what, there are thousands more people on MFP to befriend if that is your desire.

melissachipman123

I personally find so much inspiration in the weight loss photos! I love them and can't wait to get to the point where I can post mine. I think your feelings are just coming from being young and taking little things to personally.

Feed_the_Bears

Wow. You'd think these peopl would be more compassionate. Showing off your success is great, but if you're showing off without the intent to help or inspire others, then you're just plain ol' showing off!

Feed_the_Bears

Why are there so many people on here that have lost weight, and succeeded, who act like they are big shots? They feel like they are so much better than everyone else. They decline friend requests, they're so rude, and when you ask them questions for help they ignore you. I am so sick and tired of these show-offs. Congratulations for your success, but seriously stop acting like you can step all over everyone else. If i ever reach my goal, I will make sure to help out anyone that needs me, but I cant say the same for everyone else.:huh:

Most likely because they have worked damned hard to lose their weight and get into shape, that's why.

Regarding declining friend requests, that is totally up to them who they accept or decline, as it is also your privilege to do the same, as you do too.

Personally, I have not had any such experience on MFP as you so describe, the only thing I have had is being declined as a friend - but so what, there are thousands more people on MFP to befriend if that is your desire.

I admire your bluntness. That probably is the case. Don't take it personally.

Nicolle71

Hi to you,

I am sorry but I will gladly accept a friend request. My name is Nicolle and I will gladly use someones supprt during this process. I am attempting to lose 35 poucnds. My 14 year old daughter died on January 3, 2011 and I basically did nothing but bawl and eat food. I only tell you this so you know that there are normal people here trying to just make it through the day. I hope you have a better afternoon and find some MFP friends.

Nicolle

janinebudgell

Thats to bad you have had a bad experience on here. I joined on Feb 20th, 2012 and all the people I have encountered are amazing and supportive!! I love this site and the wonderful MFP friends I have made! I respect and cherish my online friendships with them ALL

Hopefully it was an isolated period and you will meet others with simliar goals, personalities, heck what ever it is you need from here!

GOOD LUCK! Don't let a little negetive from a few people get you down!

xlolitabandita

I understand where the OP is coming from, but not everyone on here is like this. I do see a lot of snarky attitudes on the message boards, and often see people being attacked for no good reason. However, that's life. Some people just don't have good manners. Also, there are other reasons someone might not responde to a freinds request or a message other than they're being mean/rude. Sometimes people misunderstand eachother. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt, especially on the internet because it's easy for these misunderstandings to occur. It's much harder to read sarcasm or tell one someone is joking or being humorous. Not to mention, it's really hard to keep your friends motivated and support them when your FL has 23947381232350 people on it. I'm sorry that you have had a bad experience on here, feel free to add me if you like.

Lauren8239

You know what's interesting about this thread. I emailed the op, I felt bad, tried to offer any help or assistance I could. I lost a lot of weight, so I decided to send the OP a FR. Trying to be as supportive as possible. DECLINED!!


Look like the pot is calling the kettle black.

wow, now that is irony.

rahrahrita

I haven't really come across these people myself but there are jerks everywhere. Skinny jerks, fat jerks, skinny jerks who used to be fat...

mfpcopine

I've never turned down anyone's Friend request. I use my weight in my ticker not to show off, but to add context. The issues I, a short, small-framed, mature (hence, slower metabolism), sedentary (currently injured) woman who has gained weight over the years but never been clinically overweight may be different from someone who has a great deal of weight to lose.

But whenever I respond, I am sincerely trying to be helpful.

smkafka

I have not found this to be the case. I have some really supportive friends, I have friends that do not reply but are good comic relief, and I have friends that just show up on my page. Find the ones that are supportive and make sure you ask them the questions. They are more likely to answer. I am sorry that you have not found that support. Feel free to add me if you want.

jg627

I'm an unsuccessful showoff. I do everything wrong and nobody loves me! ... but I still flaunt it anyway. I'm sexy and I know it! girl, look at that body.