Why so much hate....
Replies
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Em, you handled yourself with grace and dignity. I would have gotten my own thread locked down from sending out death threats and giving just enough info to make them scared I actually knew where they lived.
Bahaha, I was honestly just taken back by it all, I couldn't even come up with valid insults lol.0 -
Why be objective? Why care? Why not...just keep your opinions (unless asked), self-prejudices, and perceptions to yourself?0
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HATERS GONNA HATE!0
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Quit whining, thin women are the privileged group.
You're the ones in magazines, you're the ones who can fit into clothes, and if a couple people are prejudiced against you, it's nothing compared to the hate that big women get.
EDIT: to clear up, I don't mean to be a *****. I actually am skinny, and wear a size 12 because I'm really tall, and that's life.
I just get annoyed when women say, "oh, I'm too skinny, everyone hates me!"
it's sort of like when white people say, "Oh, they hate me cause I'm white!"
You guys are the privileged group, you don't get called fat pigs or the N word, the prejudice you face is miniscule compared to that of the non privileged groups. See what I mean?
That's not to say that it's acceptable to hate on you because really it doesn't matter all that much what your body looks like, we're all more than that.
I actually "get" what you are saying here. Privilege is a hard thing for some people to understand, though.
But I do understand it. And I agree that when skinny ladies are getting hated on, it generally comes from a place of jealousy and that it's all tied into that privilege...
The privilege is societally based and I think that what we need to agree on is that the PRIVILEGE is the enemy, not women, be they large or small. The enemy is the societal expectations, standards, and weirdness.
I was technically obese, and I hated my body because it wasn't skinny.
Now i'm skinny and I dislike that I haven't any breasts like your average hooter girl.
But my bf thinks I'm a sexy MF no matter what size I am. If only we could all be that awesome.0 -
I'd like to point out that sometimes people assume they are being hated on for their size (whatever size that may be) when really, they're hated on because they have a crap attitude.0
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I could write a book with the nasty, hate filled, evil trash thrown my way for being fat.
People hate typically because they hurt. It's not justifiable by any means. But to get to the point of hurting where it turns to hating on someone or a type of people, one typically experiences a level of humiliation, embarassement and ridicule that cannot be fathomed by words alone.
That's a good portion of why there's so much hate. Being fat in today's world is the same as having leprosy. The good thing is that being fat is a condition that you can change. That doesn't erase the evil ****e that is said or tossed your way though.
If you've never really been fat before, praise whatever gods you happen to follow, or the flying spaghetti monster as it pleases, and keep staying thin and/or fit. I'd rather chew on glass then to ever be fat again.0 -
I think the most part people mistake things like "I don't want to be a size 2, that's too small for me!" With "hate". Same things goes for people saying "I would never want to be that muscular" as an insult to muscular women. Or guys saying "I'd prefer skinny women" as insults to all non-skinny women. I see very few examples of true body bashing on this site, and when there is an example of it, the person gets called out very quickly by a lot of people.
no, that's not at all confusing. It's when people say "ewww, gross!" or "dude looks like a MAN!" or things of that nature ALL too often. True, threads get pulled after reported, but it still does happen too often.
I don't think its confusing but I do see people taking offense to those sorts of comments a lot.0 -
I'd like to point out that sometimes people assume they are being hated on for their size (whatever size that may be) when really, they're hated on because they have a crap attitude.
I don't know, a lot of the hate I've seen whether it's on bigger girls or smaller girls, had nothing to do with their attitude.0 -
I think the most part people mistake things like "I don't want to be a size 2, that's too small for me!" With "hate". Same things goes for people saying "I would never want to be that muscular" as an insult to muscular women. Or guys saying "I'd prefer skinny women" as insults to all non-skinny women. I see very few examples of true body bashing on this site, and when there is an example of it, the person gets called out very quickly by a lot of people.
no, that's not at all confusing. It's when people say "ewww, gross!" or "dude looks like a MAN!" or things of that nature ALL too often. True, threads get pulled after reported, but it still does happen too often.
I don't think its confusing but I do see people taking offense to those sorts of comments a lot.
I don't even know what to say to those people, then.... but to those who've been the victim of being called "gross" or "manly" yes, that makes sense to think it was hate or bashing.0 -
The one thing we all need to remember is that no matter what shape we are on the outside, I would hazard a guess that there isn’t a single person here who is 100% happy with what they see in the mirror! (If they were 100% happy, why would they be here, tracking calories and logging exercises?)
Coming from personal experience... when a lot of people look in the mirror, they see their flaws. They don’t always see the amazing parts of them… instead their attention is drawn to the cellulite on their thighs, or the armpit fat, or flabby triceps, beer gut, baby pouch, saggy boobs, moobs, ugly toes… or any piece of their body that isn’t what society would call “perfection”.
People stereotyped as “super skinny” often want to be curvier. People stereotyped as “overweight” often want to be thinner. Straight hair wants curly, curly hair wants straight, hairy men want smooth, and smooth men want a carpet… etc. Very few people seem completely happy in their own skin – so try to remember that when you look at a person and think they’re perfect (or privileged) the way they are and should just quit their whining.
Based on what I’ve seen thus far, a huge number of us have been abused mentally for our shape – whatever shape that is and has been! We operate out of a foggy view of the world as a result, and oftentimes our reactions and posts emerge from our own pain. Let us not abuse others and inflict the same kind of pain on them!
Myself, I was always the fat, ugly, stupid, sasquatch growing up. I know in my head that I didn’t fit any of those descriptions… well ok, maybe at 6’1 the sasquatch one kinda fit… but they still became my identity. For years, when I looked in the mirror, all I could see was fat ugly stupid. I STILL struggle when I look in the mirror. Taking pic after pic after pic and destroying them all because they didn’t pass the quality check.
I admit, I have a lot of mental growing up to do, but wanted to encourage the size 0’s and 44’s and every size below, in between, and above – to learn to accept yourself first… once you do that, accepting others becomes much easier.0 -
Haterz gonna hate!0
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love it!0 -
:laugh: :laugh:i was once told I needed to eat a cheeseburger.
what's up with the cheeseburger???
I'm a vegetarian!
Why not a burrito? Or cheese pizza? Or a donut? Or chocolate cake? Those are all things I would eat!
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:0 -
they just mad.. LOL. be the size you want to be. 0 8 12, 18 40.. people kill me.0
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Jealousy ........but I really haven't seen that much but I'm new.0
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Mirey Gal! You hit the nail on the head!
I do think there is still some privilege for "skinny" girls. Like no ever says "no skinny chicks!" But i agree that we have all been beat up about our bodies and how they are not "perfect." The "privilege" that I think is real is not a justification for bashing "skinny" girls. No way!! Because now I'm "skinny" and I still see all the ways I don't fit the societal expectation...like my hip bones are square. My breasts too small. My hair too fuzzy. Or the way my veins pop out isn't "feminine"...
None of us will be the photoshopped airbrushed models we are shown all day.
Even the models aren't the models we are shown every day.
None of us are two dimensional objects. We are humans, with feelings and flaws.0 -
I don't think it matters what size I am. people are always jealous of how sexy I am, and sadly there's nothing I can do about it :grumble:0
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The one thing we all need to remember is that no matter what shape we are on the outside, I would hazard a guess that there isn’t a single person here who is 100% happy with what they see in the mirror! (If they were 100% happy, why would they be here, tracking calories and logging exercises?)
Coming from personal experience... when a lot of people look in the mirror, they see their flaws. They don’t always see the amazing parts of them… instead their attention is drawn to the cellulite on their thighs, or the armpit fat, or flabby triceps, beer gut, baby pouch, saggy boobs, moobs, ugly toes… or any piece of their body that isn’t what society would call “perfection”.
People stereotyped as “super skinny” often want to be curvier. People stereotyped as “overweight” often want to be thinner. Straight hair wants curly, curly hair wants straight, hairy men want smooth, and smooth men want a carpet… etc. Very few people seem completely happy in their own skin – so try to remember that when you look at a person and think they’re perfect (or privileged) the way they are and should just quit their whining.
Based on what I’ve seen thus far, a huge number of us have been abused mentally for our shape – whatever shape that is and has been! We operate out of a foggy view of the world as a result, and oftentimes our reactions and posts emerge from our own pain. Let us not abuse others and inflict the same kind of pain on them!
Myself, I was always the fat, ugly, stupid, sasquatch growing up. I know in my head that I didn’t fit any of those descriptions… well ok, maybe at 6’1 the sasquatch one kinda fit… but they still became my identity. For years, when I looked in the mirror, all I could see was fat ugly stupid. I STILL struggle when I look in the mirror. Taking pic after pic after pic and destroying them all because they didn’t pass the quality check.
I admit, I have a lot of mental growing up to do, but wanted to encourage the size 0’s and 44’s and every size below, in between, and above – to learn to accept yourself first… once you do that, accepting others becomes much easier.
THIS.
I'm here trying to lose the Nicole Ritchie saggy skin on bones look.0 -
I could write a book with the nasty, hate filled, evil trash thrown my way for being fat.
People hate typically because they hurt. It's not justifiable by any means. But to get to the point of hurting where it turns to hating on someone or a type of people, one typically experiences a level of humiliation, embarassement and ridicule that cannot be fathomed by words alone.
That's a good portion of why there's so much hate. Being fat in today's world is the same as having leprosy. The good thing is that being fat is a condition that you can change. That doesn't erase the evil ****e that is said or tossed your way though.
If you've never really been fat before, praise whatever gods you happen to follow, or the flying spaghetti monster as it pleases, and keep staying thin and/or fit. I'd rather chew on glass then to ever be fat again.
Very well said. And honestly, to further this example of "WHY" we (we, collectively) bash people that have what we want, is that on this site particularly a lot of us are hurting from what we go through for our size.
Not that it validates the bashing, but I think this is the closest you will get to a why answer.0 -
I could write a book with the nasty, hate filled, evil trash thrown my way for being fat.
People hate typically because they hurt. It's not justifiable by any means. But to get to the point of hurting where it turns to hating on someone or a type of people, one typically experiences a level of humiliation, embarassement and ridicule that cannot be fathomed by words alone.
That's a good portion of why there's so much hate. Being fat in today's world is the same as having leprosy. The good thing is that being fat is a condition that you can change. That doesn't erase the evil ****e that is said or tossed your way though.
If you've never really been fat before, praise whatever gods you happen to follow, or the flying spaghetti monster as it pleases, and keep staying thin and/or fit. I'd rather chew on glass then to ever be fat again.
Very well said. And honestly, to further this example of "WHY" we (we, collectively) bash people that have what we want, is that on this site particularly a lot of us are hurting from what we go through for our size.
Not that it validates the bashing, but I think this is the closest you will get to a why answer.
I think if one doesn't fit what society finds attractive or acceptable one is bashed. Bigger people think we (thinner people) have it easier, and in fact, if you are thin and look like Angelina Jolie, well yeah life is "easier".
But if you are thin, socially awkward, and are into things that aren't "cool" or "trendy", then you will be picked on simply because you are different.
I have never ever once felt I had it made due to my weight, probably because I am not attractive according to the majority. I wear thick glasses most of the time, am a budding cat lady and can recite LOTR. Therefore, not attractive.0 -
I can kinda see why people hate on others who are truly anorexic.. because ppl dont understand, its a mental illness. I think other women hate on skinny people for reasons like jeloousy and insecurity. No one should hate on anyone here! Everyone is here trying to better themselves. We should be encouraging, and praising people who are doing a great job. One woman to another, we should be supporting each other, not bashing! No matter what, there are always going to be people who are jelous and insecure; those ppl are trying to hurt others in order to make themselves feel better.0
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My two bits?
Instead of skinny people basing the hate on jealousy, and my fellow fat people basing the hate on sizists or self haters. How about we just you know, stop the hate together. Kumbayah and all that stuff. Stop feeding trolls, stop using this site for self or the harming of others and just be excellent with each other.
Jesus, did none of you learn from Bill and Ted?0 -
towards women that are thinner? Or women that don't want to be a size 14?
I mean, seriously, what is the whole issue with this? I am truly curious. There is thread after thread bashing smaller women, calling us "anorexic", "sticks", etc.
We're all here to better our health and lives, and to see such horrid threads is really sickening and hurtful.
I haven't seen these threads personally, however I know this exists in general on and off of these forums. A lot of people have told/will tell you people are jealous. Sometimes it is jealousy but I don't think it is to the extent that people make it out to be. I know that thin women are bashed sometimes and so are women who aren't. The only difference is that being thin is generally more acceptable. I am not saying that bashing anyone under any circumstance is alright but some of the time people just feel it's ok to bash what they generally see as the "norm" or more acceptable. It seems to them like there's less harm done and sometimes people genuinely do not like/prefer the thin look as opposed to being jealous and are just jerks. In other words, bashing is never okay but every person who says something negative about a thin person/being thin isn't jealous. Sometimes they don't see it as harmful and sometimes they are just jerks who also don't prefer your look.0 -
My two bits?
Instead of skinny people basing the hate on jealousy, and my fellow fat people basing the hate on sizists or self haters. How about we just you know, stop the hate together. Kumbayah and all that stuff. Stop feeding trolls, stop using this site for self or the harming of others and just be excellent with each other.
Jesus, did none of you learn from Bill and Ted?
This.... just made my day.
Love,
A former size 22 and now a size 2 (who is *still* getting trash talked for her size)0 -
I wear thick glasses most of the time, am a budding cat lady and can recite LOTR. Therefore, not attractive.
..that's wife material.0 -
I think if one doesn't fit what society finds attractive or acceptable one is bashed. Bigger people think we (thinner people) have it easier, and in fact, if you are thin and look like Angelina Jolie, well yeah life is "easier".
But if you are thin, socially awkward, and are into things that aren't "cool" or "trendy", then you will be picked on simply because you are different.
I have never ever once felt I had it made due to my weight, probably because I am not attractive according to the majority. I wear thick glasses most of the time, am a budding cat lady and can recite LOTR. Therefore, not attractive.
All of those "negative" attributes sound awesome to me btw lol. And you are pretty.0 -
Why so much hate? Because people feel insecure about themselves - pure and simple.
After the weekend I've had, I think everyone should just be happy with who they are, what they look like and be happy to be alive and taking each and every opportunity to make changes in their lives for the better.
Doesn't matter if you're black, white, purple, large, small, curvy, thin, big, or have a bright red zit on your face for all i care - Just be thankful to be alive and stop taking digs at each other....
YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE - Sieze it and have a freakin good time!
:happy: :flowerforyou:0 -
My two bits?
Instead of skinny people basing the hate on jealousy, and my fellow fat people basing the hate on sizists or self haters. How about we just you know, stop the hate together. Kumbayah and all that stuff. Stop feeding trolls, stop using this site for self or the harming of others and just be excellent with each other.
Jesus, did none of you learn from Bill and Ted?
Be excellent to each other, or party on, dude?0 -
I think if one doesn't fit what society finds attractive or acceptable one is bashed. Bigger people think we (thinner people) have it easier, and in fact, if you are thin and look like Angelina Jolie, well yeah life is "easier".
But if you are thin, socially awkward, and are into things that aren't "cool" or "trendy", then you will be picked on simply because you are different.
I have never ever once felt I had it made due to my weight, probably because I am not attractive according to the majority. I wear thick glasses most of the time, am a budding cat lady and can recite LOTR. Therefore, not attractive.
All of those "negative" attributes sound awesome to me btw lol. And you are pretty.
Thank you :blushing:0 -
People like to hate things that make them feel self-conscious or insecure.
This is true...this is why I "hate" channing tatum and ryan reynolds. :grumble:0
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