Is there anyone here who isn't/wasn't a "sad" fat person?

Starrynights1107

I know that most people (including myself) are here to lose weight and obviously there's nothing wrong with that. However I always wonder if there is anyone who started off pretty significantly fat but did NOT start off depressed, hating themselves, hating how they looked, with no confidence, etc. Peoples' weight loss stories always seem to start off that way but mine does not. I'm just wondering if anyone can relate.

fguillory

I think I am gorgeous! I just wanna be able to wear corsets and other fun clothes. That is why I am trying to lose weight

jrwatson87

I've always loved my fat self. It wasn't hard to become socially well-adjusted always having a great social life and even being on a sports team in high school (water polo at that...my fat self in a bathing suit without a care). I have to lose weight for my health but I've never felt unattractive or unwanted. And I love to see others who are the same way

whallvr

I didn't hate myself. i think I actually had more confidence then. And I knew if someone liked me, then they really liked me for me.
I also was active and played sports. I just decided I needed to be healthier for myself and my daughter.

1Kristine1

I didn't feel terrible about myself, because I think I am a great person and had some confidence. I always found something about myself that I loved be it personality, eyes, hair, freckles etc. But I think I needed to give myself the body that I feel that I deserve. Also I don't like the prejudices people make. I wasn't depressed, I just wasn't satisfied. No one really bothered me about my weight so that could have been part of it.

Umeboshi

I've definitely never been the 'sad' fatty! When I started off on MFP I simply wondered if it was possible for me to lose weight, so I decided I'd experiment by seeing how much I was normally eating. When I saw that it was the maintenance for my weight, I went to the next stage of the experiment and started eating smaller portions and healthier foods. The weight started coming off, and I got into a routine and decided this would be a good lifestyle to get into, and that I'd enjoy being a size 16 one day instead of a 26.
I've always really loved my body even at my highest weight, and never felt disgusting or self-loathing because of my fat.

obwize

Sort of. I gained weight as a teenager and later due to depression and not wanting to be attractive as a protection from men. But recently I worked through all those issues and lost a ton of weight. It slowly crept back on (without the emotional baggage) and now I am once again 5'3" and 170 lbs. (According to BMI considered obese.) But I feel better and more attractive than I ever have before. Went shopping today and in the changing room with three way mirror had to stop and admire my body, soft tissue and all!

So yes. While I am currently overweight and want to lose some, I am certainly not sad about my current situation.

marywanoKC

Me!! I'm married to a lovely man that cherishes me (and I, him), I'm a singer, a photographer, have a great job... there's too much to be happy about! I always truthfully look down on people who refuse to see the good around them and dwell in negativity and self hatred.

1Kristine1

I didn't hate myself. i think I actually had more confidence then. And I knew if someone liked me, then they really liked me for me.

That is a good point.

nz_deevaa

I started out sad/depressed but not because I hated myself.

I'd had 3 miscarriages in 2yrs and the only 'thing' the doctors put it down to was my weight.

KenishaFitness

When I first started losing weight back in 2010, I did it just for the heck of it. but I Loved myself for the way I looked. but now I gained all that weight back + tons more.. I still feel alright.. but just not as happy as I used to be.

yuliyax

Umeboshi

I didn't hate myself. i think I actually had more confidence then. And I knew if someone liked me, then they really liked me for me.

That is a good point.

:laugh: Maybe. You have to remember there are a lot of people out there with a strong preference for fat women. I've been hit on a TON in my life BECAUSE of my hot fat body. And let's just say my partner definitely isn't with me despite my body, that's for sure. :blushing:

LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo

I was like that before being sad & was totally in denial of my body but then I realized that for a change to happen is to first love yourself. Because if you love yourself, you'll do anything to take care of your body & your health. Lose weight for your health & being able to fit into smaller clothes should be treated as icing on the cake.

1Kristine1

Maybe. You have to remember there are a lot of people out there with a strong preference for fat women. I've been hit on a TON in my life BECAUSE of my hot fat body. And let's just say my partner definitely isn't with me despite[/m] my body, that's for sure.

I suppose, but atleast when you are a little overweight you don't get every jerk on the planet eyeing you up and only seeing you as a piece of meat.

Umeboshi

Maybe. You have to remember there are a lot of people out there with a strong preference for fat women. I've been hit on a TON in my life BECAUSE of my hot fat body. And let's just say my partner definitely isn't with me despite[/m] my body, that's for sure.

I suppose, but atleast when you are a little overweight you don't get every jerk on the planet eyeing you up and only seeing you as a piece of meat.

xD I've always been SO thankful for that! Not looking forward to the extra objectification if I do get to an average weight.

Starrynights1107

Thanks for the awesome responses guys! I genuinely love when other people have love for themselves. Also, just to clarify I was not trying to put down anyone who started off depressed. All of our journeys are different and if you have pulled/are pulling yourself up from a significantly low point, I truly respect that. It is just not my own story and I'm looking for people to relate to

Nataliaho

I would love to see this thread overlaid with the 'personality type' thread.. just out of curiosity... I expect there might be some correlation, I don't know for sure though.

On topic, good on you!! I have always felt even more weak for caring so much about my weight and putting so much focus on it

1Kristine1

Maybe. You have to remember there are a lot of people out there with a strong preference for fat women. I've been hit on a TON in my life BECAUSE of my hot fat body. And let's just say my partner definitely isn't with me despite[/m] my body, that's for sure.

I suppose, but atleast when you are a little overweight you don't get every jerk on the planet eyeing you up and only seeing you as a piece of meat.

xD I've always been SO thankful for that! Not looking forward to the extra objectification if I do get to an average weight.

I don't know if it will happen to me, but I certainly don't need THAT kind of attention. My sister seems to enjoy it, I have no clue why. I am smart, funny, beautiful and have self-worth. If you wanna get with me, you better be pretty on the inside.

Umeboshi

I would love to see this thread overlaid with the 'personality type' thread.. just out of curiosity... I expect there might be some correlation, I don't know for sure though.

On topic, good on you!! I have always felt even more weak for caring so much about my weight and putting so much focus on it

I think I'm an INFP. Not 100% though, It's been a while since I took the test.
EDIT: Took another test and I've changed to INFJ. I'm probably like a mix of the two.

And to Kristine - I know EXACTLY what you mean. You go girl!

fluffysexyme

*Raises hand* I totally love me some me! It's not about shape or pants size for me. It's about health. I may not always love what I have seen in the mirror, but I always knew it was up to me to change it. I've done that a couple times. Now, it's a lifestyle thing for me. I love me still, but I wanted to quit smoking (done), eat better (getting there), and have more energy (still waiting. Jillian kills me). I can understand how people get that way, but to me it's defeating the purpose. If you can't see yourself beyond weight, you'll never be happy.

1Kristine1

HAHA. I just hate jerks.
ISFJ here
Nurturer

Starrynights1107

If you can't see yourself beyond weight, you'll never be happy.

Very true and if that's the case, even if you were to lose the weight that little voice inside telling you you aren't good enough will always find something else to pick on. Being unhappy is not a weight problem.

1Kristine1

If you can't see yourself beyond weight, you'll never be happy.

Very true and if that's the case, even if you were to lose the weight that little voice inside telling you you aren't good enough will always find something else to pick on. Being unhappy is not a weight problem.

I find happiness is the most worth-while pursuit. I am naturally pretty negative, I struggle everyday to be optimistic. But I try to appreciate something everyday. I avoid telling myself "I can't do this" or "I am not pretty enough" or "my butt looks big" it just gets you down. And who wants to make themselves feel crappy?

Vailara

It's great to see this thread! I'm another one who started off not hating her body. I don't find fat unattractive on other people, so why should I on myself? I do feel more shy about my body than when I was slim, but that's because I know other people find it unattractive or even repulsive. I don't feel so shy with my boyfriend because I know he thinks it's great!

I like the big, cuddly, voluptuous, pillowyness of my fat body. I'm losing weight because I'm trying to get healthier and fitter. If it was as easy for me to be healthy and fit in a fat body, I wouldn't mind staying fat. What got me into weight loss was that I was finding exercise difficult while carrying the extra weight around.

I sometimes find that when celebrities lose weight, I like the way they looked before. In fact, in some of the success stories here I think the people looked great to start with, and I'm not just talking about the ones who started off slimmer anyway!

I've been thinking about this a lot. When I watch TV programmes where people have lost weight, somebody always seems to say something like "You won't be that (i.e. fat) person again" and I want to shout "It's still the same person!" I hate the idea that your good qualities are somehow negated because you're fat. I hate the whole thing of looking down on the "before" person.

Starrynights1107

I would love to see this thread overlaid with the 'personality type' thread.. just out of curiosity... I expect there might be some correlation, I don't know for sure though.

On topic, good on you!! I have always felt even more weak for caring so much about my weight and putting so much focus on it

That's a great idea @the personality type thread. INTJ for me

ninerbuff

Just to add: there are very "skinny" people who are sad, depressed and unhappy. Sadness comes from dissatisfaction of one's life in general.

A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer/Group Fitness Instructor
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

1Kristine1

"You won't be that (i.e. fat) person again" and I want to shout "It's still the same person!" I hate the idea that your good qualities are somehow negated because you're fat.

Love this btw

Starrynights1107

Just to add: there are very "skinny" people who are sad, depressed and unhappy. Sadness comes from dissatisfaction of one's life in general.

A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer/Group Fitness Instructor
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

Thanks. That is actually one of my points . Dissatisfaction isn't a "fat" problem.

osualex

I didn't/don't love my body but I think I am attractive otherwise and I wasn't/am not sad. I've hated my body at 120 pounds so I know it's not actually my body, but my mind! I've had friends that have been really torn up about being overweight to the point that they refuse to go out. It's so sad! Life does not begin when you are skinny! I know I don't have a perfect body, but that's okay, because I am more than my weight.

Starrynights1107

It's great to see this thread! I'm another one who started off not hating her body. I don't find fat unattractive on other people, so why should I on myself? I do feel more shy about my body than when I was slim, but that's because I know other people find it unattractive or even repulsive. I don't feel so shy with my boyfriend because I know he thinks it's great!

I like the big, cuddly, voluptuous, pillowyness of my fat body. I'm losing weight because I'm trying to get healthier and fitter. If it was as easy for me to be healthy and fit in a fat body, I wouldn't mind staying fat. What got me into weight loss was that I was finding exercise difficult while carrying the extra weight around.

I sometimes find that when celebrities lose weight, I like the way they looked before. In fact, in some of the success stories here I think the people looked great to start with, and I'm not just talking about the ones who started off slimmer anyway!

I've been thinking about this a lot. When I watch TV programmes where people have lost weight, somebody always seems to say something like "You won't be that (i.e. fat) person again" and I want to shout "It's still the same person!" I hate the idea that your good qualities are somehow negated because you're fat. I hate the whole thing of looking down on the "before" person.

I can relate to every point you made