Is there anyone here who isn't/wasn't a "sad" fat person?

2

Replies

  • Starrynights1107
    Starrynights1107 Posts: 70 Member
    I didn't/don't love my body but I think I am attractive otherwise and I wasn't/am not sad. I've hated my body at 120 pounds so I know it's not actually my body, but my mind! I've had friends that have been really torn up about being overweight to the point that they refuse to go out. It's so sad! Life does not begin when you are skinny! I know I don't have a perfect body, but that's okay, because I am more than my weight.

    You are so fortunate to realize what some people never do @not your body but your mind and being more than your weight.
  • 1Kristine1
    1Kristine1 Posts: 697 Member
    I like this topic :flowerforyou:
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    "You won't be that (i.e. fat) person again" and I want to shout "It's still the same person!" I hate the idea that your good qualities are somehow negated because you're fat.

    Love this btw

    Yes! Love this!
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    My mom used to be close to overweight and after crazy dieting she's slightly underweight. She feels people treat her different, and not in a good way.
  • fluffysexyme
    fluffysexyme Posts: 104 Member
    If you can't see yourself beyond weight, you'll never be happy.

    Very true and if that's the case, even if you were to lose the weight that little voice inside telling you you aren't good enough will always find something else to pick on. Being unhappy is not a weight problem.
    Exactly. A weight problem is often times hiding deeper issues.
  • Starrynights1107
    Starrynights1107 Posts: 70 Member
    "You won't be that (i.e. fat) person again" and I want to shout "It's still the same person!" I hate the idea that your good qualities are somehow negated because you're fat.

    Love this btw

    Yes! Love this!

    I knew we were friends for a reason ;) lol
  • Nataliaho
    Nataliaho Posts: 878 Member
    OK, so far my sample of two has proven my hypothesis. I wonder if Introverts have a greater ability to be happy in oneself. I wonder this because as a true extrovert, I know that one of the really negative attributes I have is really really caring what anyone and everyone thinks of me. I really get my power, reassurance, confidence etc externally to myself. Its dumb...
  • TheBraveryLover
    TheBraveryLover Posts: 1,217 Member
    I have never had self-confidence issues for an extended period of time. A lot of people here are very down on themselves, and I just cannot relate. I feel bad for them, and am glad they're doing something to change it, though.

    But, yeah, OP, although my body was never significantly overweight (although I suppose that's subjective), when I was at my heaviest, I still got hit on regularly, dated a lot, went to many social events, was gregarious, etc. I've never been the "woe is me" type no matter what the situation. If I'm sad about something, I do something immediately to change it; I rarely complain about things I can control in my life.
  • elcyclista
    elcyclista Posts: 393
    I was pretty chubby when I was at the age of 10 ish or 11. After the age of 13 I lost all that excess weight.

    I was also a bit sad but I'm okay now. :]
  • Starrynights1107
    Starrynights1107 Posts: 70 Member
    I started out sad/depressed but not because I hated myself.

    I'd had 3 miscarriages in 2yrs and the only 'thing' the doctors put it down to was my weight.

    Understood and I'm sorry to hear that.
  • EchoOfYourPast
    EchoOfYourPast Posts: 459 Member
    I knew i was beginning to put on a little weight....i really didn't realize that i was starting to put on as much weight as i did until i started noticing that in my pictures...i was getting bigger and bigger....then i realized that my clothes were getting tighter and tighter....i still wear some of the same clothes i had when i started my current job 12 years ago...they just were not as loose as they used to be!! I was never unhappy or depressed and on "occasion" i would try to eat good for a week or so (not by counting calories..just cutting back some) but never for very long.
  • fluffysexyme
    fluffysexyme Posts: 104 Member
    If you can't see yourself beyond weight, you'll never be happy.

    Very true and if that's the case, even if you were to lose the weight that little voice inside telling you you aren't good enough will always find something else to pick on. Being unhappy is not a weight problem.
    I find happiness is the most worth-while pursuit. I am naturally pretty negative, I struggle everyday to be optimistic. But I try to appreciate something everyday. I avoid telling myself "I can't do this" or "I am not pretty enough" or "my butt looks big" it just gets you down. And who wants to make themselves feel crappy?
    You have to think positive ON PURPOSE until it becomes natural. Such a huge key. You also have to own things. So for you it's ur butt. Own it! Think "my butt looks big. But it's mine, big and all. Someone some where wants this booty and I got it" then shake it,.smack it, laugh at yourself and roll on. Lying to yourself is pointless and trying to avoid your own thoughts is silly. For me, it's my arms. They're HUGE. Like seriously... HUUUUGGGGEEE. but they're mine. Only arms I'm ever gonna have. I'd be pissed if they were amputated so I'm gonna love em anyway, even if I wave twice. I'm just extra nice! Lol
  • Starrynights1107
    Starrynights1107 Posts: 70 Member
    OK, so far my sample of two has proven my hypothesis. I wonder if Introverts have a greater ability to be happy in oneself. I wonder this because as a true extrovert, I know that one of the really negative attributes I have is really really caring what anyone and everyone thinks of me. I really get my power, reassurance, confidence etc externally to myself. Its dumb...

    I figured that might have been your hypothesis. I think there could be something to it. Introverts tend to spend a lot of time getting to know themselves. That could definitely be helpful with confidence, etc.
  • Starrynights1107
    Starrynights1107 Posts: 70 Member
    I have never had self-confidence issues for an extended period of time. A lot of people here are very down on themselves, and I just cannot relate. I feel bad for them, and am glad they're doing something to change it, though.

    But, yeah, OP, although my body was never significantly overweight (although I suppose that's subjective), when I was at my heaviest, I still got hit on regularly, dated a lot, went to many social events, was gregarious, etc. I've never been the "woe is me" type no matter what the situation. If I'm sad about something, I do something immediately to change it; I rarely complain about things I can control in my life.

    Same @everything, except for attending many social events lol. It's due to my personality though and not my weight. I prefer solitude, just my significant other and I or very small gatherings :)
  • unsuspectingfish
    unsuspectingfish Posts: 1,176 Member
    Well, I started off depressed, but it had absolutely nothing to do with my weight.
    I would love to see this thread overlaid with the 'personality type' thread.. just out of curiosity... I expect there might be some correlation, I don't know for sure though.

    On topic, good on you!! I have always felt even more weak for caring so much about my weight and putting so much focus on it :)

    INTJ
  • Starrynights1107
    Starrynights1107 Posts: 70 Member
    You have to think positive ON PURPOSE until it becomes natural. Such a huge key. You also have to own things. So for you it's ur butt. Own it! Think "my butt looks big. But it's mine, big and all. Someone some where wants this booty and I got it" then shake it,.smack it, laugh at yourself and roll on. Lying to yourself is pointless and trying to avoid your own thoughts is silly. For me, it's my arms. They're HUGE. Like seriously... HUUUUGGGGEEE. but they're mine. Only arms I'm ever gonna have. I'd be pissed if they were amputated so I'm gonna love em anyway, even if I wave twice. I'm just extra nice! Lol

    Lol <3 this
  • OfficerFuzzy
    OfficerFuzzy Posts: 222 Member
    I love being me.
    I love me so much I might be conceited. (Though, honestly, I'm too awesome to be considered such. I'm just realistic.)

    Being happy and fat has made weight loss so much easier than if I were fat and sad. At least in my opinion.
    You've just got to love being yourself no matter who you are at the moment, or what package you come in, IMNSHO.

    Edit:
    Just to say it , I'm more introverted-ish.
  • Starrynights1107
    Starrynights1107 Posts: 70 Member
    I love being me.
    I love me so much I might be conceited. (Though, honestly, I'm too awesome to be considered such. I'm just realistic.)

    Being happy and fat has made weight loss so much easier than if I were fat and sad. At least in my opinion.
    You've just got to love being yourself no matter who you are at the moment, or what package you come in, IMNSHO.

    Oh, absolutely @being happy making weight loss easier. Happiness makes everything easier! lol It's part of the reason I've never understood people who feel they should try to "shame" someone into losing weight all the while talking about "health" but attempting to tear a person down mentally. THAT isn't healthy.
  • runnercheryl
    runnercheryl Posts: 1,314 Member
    Another one here who didn't hate being fat. I liked it, and I was happy, but eventually I realised it wasn't just about me. I wanted to consider a future with my own family, and I refused to stay the way I was because I wanted to be healthy for kids.

    If it were just about me, I expect I would've stayed fat and been fine with it. BUT now that I am losing weight, I'm happy with my new identity and being fit and healthy.
  • Starrynights1107
    Starrynights1107 Posts: 70 Member
    Another one here who didn't hate being fat. I liked it, and I was happy, but eventually I realised it wasn't just about me. I wanted to consider a future with my own family, and I refused to stay the way I was because I wanted to be healthy for kids.

    If it were just about me, I expect I would've stayed fat and been fine with it. BUT now that I am losing weight, I'm happy with my new identity and being fit and healthy.

    I hear ya :)
  • OfficerFuzzy
    OfficerFuzzy Posts: 222 Member
    So true. It just makes the world go around. (It comes from money, the happiness. xD)

    I''ve never really understood how some people think that they can/should convince other's to loss weight. It's never going to work.
  • PennyNickel14
    PennyNickel14 Posts: 749 Member
    Yeah, I did not hate my body or my life or anything. I honestly thought it would feel better and I would be healthier. Hysterically I was feeling really great about my body 100 lbs ago. Now not so much :). Still working on it. It's a work in progress.

    Yes, I had a much healthier sense of self as a heavy person.
  • Natty0506
    Natty0506 Posts: 103 Member
    I've never been disgusted by how I look or depressed or anything. I was raised to have a positive mind set, and it's stuck with me my entire life. Even now, at probably my highest weight ever, I don't hate myself. I'd just rather be a size 8 than an 18.
  • Ohmydaze
    Ohmydaze Posts: 403 Member
    Reading through this is pretty eye opening. I'm jealous. I hated myself.as a chubby child, and often hate myself as a slim teenager. It sucks!
  • bethgames
    bethgames Posts: 534 Member
    You have to think positive ON PURPOSE until it becomes natural. Such a huge key. You also have to own things. So for you it's ur butt. Own it! Think "my butt looks big. But it's mine, big and all. Someone some where wants this booty and I got it" then shake it,.smack it, laugh at yourself and roll on. Lying to yourself is pointless and trying to avoid your own thoughts is silly. For me, it's my arms. They're HUGE. Like seriously... HUUUUGGGGEEE. but they're mine. Only arms I'm ever gonna have. I'd be pissed if they were amputated so I'm gonna love em anyway, even if I wave twice. I'm just extra nice! Lol
    [/quote]

    ^^^This! I am not unhappy with the way I look in the mirror, but pictures seem to tell a different story. LOL However, I am VERY unhappy being 45 and feeling like I am 65. Everything hurting and hard to get up and get moving. So I am changing for my health and my family. Happy is a way of life, fat or thin. I've been both and relatively happy, even if I am a bit vain either way :flowerforyou:
  • dansls1
    dansls1 Posts: 309 Member
    Nope - I was pretty happy and content. Just started to worry about my long term health. Happier now just because I don't have those worries ;)
  • Going4Lean
    Going4Lean Posts: 1,078 Member
    I was lean when i was about 12 and then i got depressed and gain the weight.
  • 1Kristine1
    1Kristine1 Posts: 697 Member
    If you can't see yourself beyond weight, you'll never be happy.

    Very true and if that's the case, even if you were to lose the weight that little voice inside telling you you aren't good enough will always find something else to pick on. Being unhappy is not a weight problem.
    I find happiness is the most worth-while pursuit. I am naturally pretty negative, I struggle everyday to be optimistic. But I try to appreciate something everyday. I avoid telling myself "I can't do this" or "I am not pretty enough" or "my butt looks big" it just gets you down. And who wants to make themselves feel crappy?
    You have to think positive ON PURPOSE until it becomes natural. Such a huge key. You also have to own things. So for you it's ur butt. Own it! Think "my butt looks big. But it's mine, big and all. Someone some where wants this booty and I got it" then shake it,.smack it, laugh at yourself and roll on. Lying to yourself is pointless and trying to avoid your own thoughts is silly. For me, it's my arms. They're HUGE. Like seriously... HUUUUGGGGEEE. but they're mine. Only arms I'm ever gonna have. I'd be pissed if they were amputated so I'm gonna love em anyway, even if I wave twice. I'm just extra nice! Lol
    Exactly, my uniqueness is what makes me, me. And I wouldn't trade that for the world.

    Also I do believe introverts may practice more self-reflection.
  • 1Kristine1
    1Kristine1 Posts: 697 Member
    Reading through this is pretty eye opening. I'm jealous. I hated myself.as a chubby child, and often hate myself as a slim teenager. It sucks!
    Just try to appreciate yourself, for who you are. You deserve to be happy, start with that.
  • jillica
    jillica Posts: 554 Member
    I am not a "sad" fat person. That is one of the reasons that I struggle to lose weight I think.
    Sure I want to look better, and YES! I want to be a better example to my children, and YES I can get down on myself over my weight, but I'm not a sad fat person.

    I have low moments when I grab the Doritos, and the voice says "Nothing can taste as good as being thin feels." but I say back, "Ehh, I don't feel so bad now." Thus, my challenge.

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