Is there anyone here who isn't/wasn't a "sad" fat person?
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I am not a "sad" fat person. That is one of the reasons that I struggle to lose weight I think.
Sure I want to look better, and YES! I want to be a better example to my children, and YES I can get down on myself over my weight, but I'm not a sad fat person.
I have low moments when I grab the Doritos, and the voice says "Nothing can taste as good as being thin feels." but I say back, "Ehh, I don't feel so bad now." Thus, my challenge.
LOL I can totally see/understand that. That's a really honest answer.0 -
I started gaining weight at the age of 9, 2nd grade. Around this time my mother had divorced my step dad and i was being bullied in school for my weight. Had no friends and felt alone and ugly. My real father only had visitations most my life, an alcoholic, who only filled my head with lies, made me feel like nothing. My mom pulled me out of school after 2nd grade because i wasnt able to talk to anyone, the doctors thought i was emotionally detached. She home schooled me for 4 years...which included giving me a book a week, books below my grade level, puzzle books, math books for kids you can buy at a book store. Not work issued from the school system...So as i sat feeling like i was getting dumber and eating my emotions day after day. Having random visitations with my real dad who spoke only nasty of my mother my whole life and smelled of whiskey 24/7. I will never forget him always feeding me candy, chocolate bars, lots of them. potato chips....telling me "I hope you end up fat and ugly so no man wants you".....I had blocked this out until therapy revealed it in my teenage years later on in life. But I truly believe my weight was my fathers fault. And all the kids that teased me, and my mom beat me. all my sisters....I lived a life of devistation, molestation, physical, mental and emotional abuse. Eating was my escape...i felt good while i was eating, it tasted good, and when i was full. It hurt, but i was feeling something other than heart ache. it was stomach pains. which isnt what i wanted, only made me more depressed. but then i did it again, and again....It took years, i took counciling, went to church, read self help books, pray every day...and lots of healing and forgivness towards those who have HURT me deeply. Then i was able to see myself, really see me. For who i am...not for who everyone saw me as, this FAT *kitten*, UGLY, STUPID girl.....no. I began to see i was creative, an individual, beautiful, funny, worth loving. If i dont love myself, if i dont break that wall down. if i dont stop thinking the worlds out to get me, i cant live life to its fullest. I had to forget and forgive all those nasty "LIES" people have implanted in my head over the years. and see the truth God see's. He created me in his image. imperfectly perfect! I want to lose weight for myself now. not for anyone else. and now that its for me, i finally have the self control, the passion and drive.1
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Reading everyone responce im realizing i was a little too detailed on my answer. LOL
Well....maybe it helps someone..0 -
I'm not fat but I still hate how I look! Being thin isn't always attractive either, I just want to be fit and in shape! I am more skinny fat than anything so basically I have a low weight but high body fat %...so untoned abs and legs..yuckk! I think we all struggle with our self image somtimes, we all have our days.
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I am fat but not sad lol. The sad part is, is that i am happier now then i was in a size 2. Although my size has nothing to do with my happiness. Love the question though0
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ThisI started gaining weight at the age of 9, 2nd grade. Around this time my mother had divorced my step dad and i was being bullied in school for my weight. Had no friends and felt alone and ugly. My real father only had visitations most my life, an alcoholic, who only filled my head with lies, made me feel like nothing. My mom pulled me out of school after 2nd grade because i wasnt able to talk to anyone, the doctors thought i was emotionally detached. She home schooled me for 4 years...which included giving me a book a week, books below my grade level, puzzle books, math books for kids you can buy at a book store. Not work issued from the school system...So as i sat feeling like i was getting dumber and eating my emotions day after day. Having random visitations with my real dad who spoke only nasty of my mother my whole life and smelled of whiskey 24/7. I will never forget him always feeding me candy, chocolate bars, lots of them. potato chips....telling me "I hope you end up fat and ugly so no man wants you".....I had blocked this out until therapy revealed it in my teenage years later on in life. But I truly believe my weight was my fathers fault. And all the kids that teased me, and my mom beat me. all my sisters....I lived a life of devistation, molestation, physical, mental and emotional abuse. Eating was my escape...i felt good while i was eating, it tasted good, and when i was full. It hurt, but i was feeling something other than heart ache. it was stomach pains. which isnt what i wanted, only made me more depressed. but then i did it again, and again....It took years, i took counciling, went to church, read self help books, pray every day...and lots of healing and forgivness towards those who have HURT me deeply. Then i was able to see myself, really see me. For who i am...not for who everyone saw me as, this FAT *kitten*, UGLY, STUPID girl.....no. I began to see i was creative, an individual, beautiful, funny, worth loving. If i dont love myself, if i dont break that wall down. if i dont stop thinking the worlds out to get me, i cant live life to its fullest. I had to forget and forgive all those nasty "LIES" people have implanted in my head over the years. and see the truth God see's. He created me in his image. imperfectly perfect! I want to lose weight for myself now. not for anyone else. and now that its for me, i finally have the self control, the passion and drive.
Thanks for sharing your testimony it truly blessed me and I identified with much of it.1 -
Reading everyone responce im realizing i was a little too detailed on my answer. LOL
Well....maybe it helps someone..
Lol Nothing at all wrong with a detailed answer. I asked for responses and I got em
. Thanks for sharing your story and I'm glad that you were able to overcome your situation. That's awesome and inspiring 0 -
I'm not fat but I still hate how I look! Being thin isn't always attractive either, I just want to be fit and in shape! I am more skinny fat than anything so basically I have a low weight but high body fat %...so untoned abs and legs..yuckk! I think we all struggle with our self image somtimes, we all have our days.)
That we do@ have our days. Good luck 0 -
I am fat but not sad lol. The sad part is, is that i am happier now then i was in a size 2. Although my size has nothing to do with my happiness. Love the question though
Glad you aren't sad lol and that you liked the topic, thanks.0 -
I am not a "sad" fat person. That is one of the reasons that I struggle to lose weight I think.
Sure I want to look better, and YES! I want to be a better example to my children, and YES I can get down on myself over my weight, but I'm not a sad fat person.
I have low moments when I grab the Doritos, and the voice says "Nothing can taste as good as being thin feels." but I say back, "Ehh, I don't feel so bad now." Thus, my challenge.
I can absolutely relate to that. I don't have this giant pressure of not loving myself, hating my body or some sort of big drive. It's just something that I need to do. It's like balancing a checkbook to me- not like 'shedding my skin' or 'finally having the inside and outside match'. Nothing wrong with feeling that way- but I don't feel that way.
I'm awesome. I just happen to have a body that likes to store awesome away for future awesome drought. So I have to keep moving to keep the awesome level right. I just don't see it as this big deal really.
Kinda jealous of those who DO have this huge drive but don't really want the bad things that come to give that sort of drive to a person.0 -
I don't think I've ever HATED my body. Yes, I've become upset when a piece of clothing didn't fit, or when a store doesn't have my size. But in general, my body is good to me
My boyfriend loves it, and if someone else can, it would be silly for me not to!
I think I need to be healthier, and I love clothing too much, so that's why I'm losing weight. But I've always had guys hit on me, and I've always been a fun-loving, happy person.
My roommate actually told me once that she can't picture my face being sad. I've always got a smile 0 -
I know that most people (including myself) are here to lose weight and obviously there's nothing wrong with that. However I always wonder if there is anyone who started off pretty significantly fat but did NOT start off depressed, hating themselves, hating how they looked, with no confidence, etc. Peoples' weight loss stories always seem to start off that way but mine does not. I'm just wondering if anyone can relate.
I was most definitely not happy with Myself, but I can truly say, I was NOT depressed (THANK GOD!) I have always been supremely confident in Myself (I'm a woman lawyer and when I started law school you could count the women there on 2 hands.), as I gained weight I did NOT like how I looked and I am sure that cost Me promotions...BUT I was always confident in My "tastes" in clothes/shoes/jewelry/My Grooming and I knew I was the best I could look even though I was obese. I also knew that I was good looking and had a "presence" about Me. But for sure I was unhappy about My weight and how I know I was perceived (as undisciplined because of the weight gain.) That bothered Me too. But it was true, I was disciplined in every other part of My Life but Eating and Exercise (My HEALTH). NOW I know of ALL the areas of which I should have been Disciplined and Constant<> My Health should have been 1st...and NOT just Lip Service to it! I have learned, if you don't care about Yourself (Loving Oneself does Not Indulging in what is Not good for you), there is no way You can care for someone else...No Matter how Much Stuff you do for them or what you Give them. To Love Someone is to Pray for THEM what You Pray for Yourself.
My Prayer for Me is: Live Total Wellness, Success in All that is Good, and may I have the Peace and Joy of God upon Me...Because I know how this Feels and the LIFE that comes with it! So that is My Prayer for Everyone.0 -
I've been reading many posts (on THIS Thread) and a person who is keeping their SANITY can not say or believe that they are ugly, hate themselves or become too depressed. A person has to be able to defend themselves from all of the environmental and external factors that are trying to bring them down. They have to fight back against all of the forces that say that they are "worthless' because of their size or color or Body type or Ethnic features... whatever may be the case. You have to find some type of "swagger" to keep YOU going until You find a way to help Yourself.
Anyone who intrinsically "hates" themselves over mutable characteristics (such a weight) is a but crazy, and those that give in and hate themselves over their IMMUTABLE Characteristics are Psychologically damaged. So it is important to have some "pride" in yourself or you will drown behind all of the people that hate you for being you. The Serenity Prayer is what keep people sane when the know they are hated/disliked for who that ARE. Whether they know the Prayer or not, they Live it...
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.0 -
I didn't come here feeling I was "fat". I just had fat I wanted to lose, and in exchange, gain muscle! For some people, you might need to hit the low of feeling bad about yourself in order to get motivation, but I hope that changes for anyone who felt like they were a "sad fat person", or still does. You're outside does not determine who you are, but it's still important to maintain a healthy lifestyle. 0
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Thankyou, and im glad it was inspirational. oxo0
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Im so glad that you were able to empathize with my story. And thankyou for sending me a request. oxo i look forward to helping you with support. 0
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I've always been a big dude but between my smile, awesomeness, and clothes i never had too many problems getting women. I think thats what led me down the slippery path, i was so comfortable in my skin i didnt notice when i went from 240 to 250 to 275 then 300+0
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I've been reading many posts (on THIS Thread) and a person who is keeping their SANITY can not say or believe that they are ugly, hate themselves or become too depressed. A person has to be able to defend themselves from all of the environmental and external factors that are trying to bring them down. They have to fight back against all of the forces that say that they are "worthless' because of their size or color or Body type or Ethnic features... whatever may be the case. You have to find some type of "swagger" to keep YOU going until You find a way to help Yourself.
Anyone who intrinsically "hates" themselves over mutable characteristics (such a weight) is a but crazy, and those that give in and hate themselves over their IMMUTABLE Characteristics are Psychologically damaged. So it is important to have some "pride" in yourself or you will drown behind all of the people that hate you for being you. The Serenity Prayer is what keep people sane when the know they are hated/disliked for who that ARE. Whether they know the Prayer or not, they Live it...
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
This is a beautiful response. Thank you SO much for this.0 -
I'm super happy; usually am no matter what size I am.0
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I was never "sad". I had some confidence, not a whole lot, but it was there. Ive always loved myself, but I didnt love how I looked. So I decided to make a change, and voila! here I am today, loving myself inside AND out more every day. and the best part is Im not even at my goal yet!0
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Thanks for the awesome responses guys! I genuinely love when other people have love for themselves. Also, just to clarify I was not trying to put down anyone who started off depressed. All of our journeys are different and if you have pulled/are pulling yourself up from a significantly low point, I truly respect that. It is just not my own story and I'm looking for people to relate to
Thank you for starting this thread. I have to admit I have not always felt sure of myself at any weight. When I was reed thin I wanted to gain weight, even prayed to gain. Over the years I have packed on the pounds and I do for the most feel more confident about myself than I have in a long time. I have a very loving, supportive, handsome fit husband, who is so encouraging. I know that I am blessed that I have made it thus far and I plan on living a full and abundant life each day.0 -
I've always been a big dude but between my smile, awesomeness, and clothes i never had too many problems getting women. I think thats what led me down the slippery path, i was so comfortable in my skin i didnt notice when i went from 240 to 250 to 275 then 300+
I understand. Confidence and self love can be a gift and, in a crazy turn of events a curse. That's one reason it's important not to place so much stock in what others think of you not ONLY when they think negatively of you but also when they think you're great (no problem getting women/men, etc.). You know you best. It's important to realize that. Other peoples' influence can definitely send you down a slippery slope (in terms of life in general, not just weight), sometimes even when those people have the best intentions 0 -
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