Please help I'm almost in tears

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  • CoderGal
    CoderGal Posts: 6,800 Member
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    Since you are stressed and theres no time to work out so you say I think ab vacuums may make you feel better. I found them theraputic because you can do them anywhere any time and feel like your getting somewhere. I do them in bed while im trying to get to sleep. I do these and try to walk everywhere and move where I can. If I get a spare moment I try doing a plank (not for long, bad back). This has been my stomach results (no weight or measurement changes) in less then a month

    2ch1edf.jpg
    334keh1.jpg

    Looking back I wanted to loose my weight because of my stomach. Now I think I was being foolish :p The extra exertion has me able to eat higher cals as well. Usually about 2000.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    Decide something else is more important for a little while. Focus on something outside of your body. Focus on someone else if you have to. But you cant get this consumed with yourself, its just not healthy. Not healhy at all to be this wrapped up in your physical appearance. Go volunteer lifeguard or something active that will kill two birds with one stone.
  • RunHardBeStrong
    RunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,069 Member
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    Strength training (no, not Jillian Michaels, P90x, or Chaleen Extreme), and eating at a slight caloric deficit. All the crunches in the world aren't going to make your belly fat go away...but a deficit and strength training 3x a week will.

    Also, you don't have to have a gym to strength train. There's a bodyweight program on my profile that is incredibly effective. I went from a 42" waist to a 32" waist in 3mos.

    This, this and oh this!! Trust it, he knows what he's talking about!! I didn't start getting results I wanted until I started lifting weights. You lift heavy as in what is challenging for you. It will not make you bulky unless that's the look are training for and you will have to train hard to do so. Fat is what makes you bulky, muscle leans you out.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    please anything eles ?

    What's your body fat percentage? Was your abdomen flat before you gained weight?

    As you've had EDs in the past, you should talk to a therapist about body dysmorphia.
  • casiescorey
    casiescorey Posts: 14
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    Get P90x and do the Ab Ripper section. It's only 15 minutes long but it's an amazing KILLER for your abs, and I mean ALL your abs...sides, upper, lower, you name it!

    Also, keep in mind, stress causes cortisol to build up in your body.......cortisol causes belly fat. SO DON'T STRESS about it!
    Check out this link.
    http://www.livestrong.com/article/259751-how-to-reduce-cortisol-belly-fat/


    How tall are you?

    ~c
  • Mickey111970
    Mickey111970 Posts: 6
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    Hot yoga.

    My stomach is flat even on days I over eat!

    But you have to have patience. Took me 2 months to see visible results. Slow and steady wins the race.
    i herd about that does it really work
    i thought yoga was just a way to de stress and find peace with your self

    If you are that stressed maybe you should try yoga along with some of the other suggestions.
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
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    As many others have said - your number one priority is to get some counseling. You have a body image issue that needs to be address otherwise you will never be happy with your weight loss results.

    1 - seek counseling immediately
    2 - focus on all the positives in your life
    3 - work on feeling good about what you have accomplished so far
    4 - serious strength training....it will change your body!
    5 - make sure you are getting enough calories and hitting your macros to support your work outs
    6 - and someone else suggested re-focusing on different avenues of your life...very good advice. Volunteer work with cancer patients, children that are ill, burn victims, and the elderly will make you put a little bit of belly fat in prospective!!!
  • LHudson53
    LHudson53 Posts: 126
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    I'm so sorry that your stress level is so high, and that you are unhappy. I wish I could say something to help. But please know there are a lot of people here that are so supportive and helpful. Make some new friends who can lift you up, and know that even the people who sound mean are, for the most part, trying to help. Good luck and God bless....
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
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    Straight up, you have a distorted image of how you should look and should get help.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer/Group Fitness Instructor
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    ^This

    I'd venture a guess that you are far more beautiful than you give yourself credit for. Please get help.
  • jillica
    jillica Posts: 554 Member
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    1st - Congratulations on your weight loss!

    2nd - You weigh 118 and have lost 40 lbs! Be patient - your body may need to adjust a little after the weight loss. The advice of core work and strength training is good to whittle your middle.

    3rd - The very way you described your lower stomach as the "most disgusting thing you've seen" has me worried and may suggest that you really do have a negative body image. Or that you are comparing yourself to air-brushed celebrities.

    Please focus on the positive and remember where you came from and all you've done, OR ELSE I will send you a photo of my waist! Ha! You are beautiful, you are strong!
  • jillica
    jillica Posts: 554 Member
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    CODERGAL!!!!!! - Really a package of Oreos in your success pic? Really? :blushing: Good for you!
  • REET420
    REET420 Posts: 160 Member
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    How is your stress level? There are several studies that show stress can lead to excess belly fat.

    This


    Walk everyday and keep doing your work outs
  • Abrandnewme36
    Abrandnewme36 Posts: 47 Member
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    Try the 30 day shred, I've been doing it 6 days and already notice a difference in my stomach and back fat!
  • littlemiss5foot1
    littlemiss5foot1 Posts: 75 Member
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    Sweeetyyy!!!! You ar doing so Well!!! look how far you have come!!! Instead of focasing on the negatives, look at the positives, Look at the Journey you are on and what YOU have accomplished! ! Thers always time to excercise, make time, you dont need a gym! You have 3 beautifull children, play with them, laugh ( i for one get sore abs from laughing!) chase them round be great bonding time and ull get your excerise at the same time, go for little walks round the block, take the family pet or take the kids

    Diet pills stay away... if your feeling stressed and a depressed keep away from them.... Try Blackmores womans De-stress... we get here in Oz should be able to get it where u r if not its def on the net, I used to take it and it actually helps! Its a vitamin suppliment :)

    Planking is good... but put somthing on tv for god sake coz if u have an attention spam like me ull cave haha if u have small children mabe get one of them to sit on ur back for added weight? make a game out of it! ( planking is like laying downon ur tummy with ur arms under u so ur head shoulder is sitting up and rising in akind of push up postition without doing the actual pushup .. tuck ur tummy in hold tight rise and hold for 30 seconds.. 10n seconds break and do it again... i suck at explaining things.... but....check out this website for womans health its actually really helpfull! http://oxygenmag.com/Home.aspx


    Are u eating frequently?
    Are you taking any Contreceptive pills?
    you mentioned self harming are u on meds for this?

    Yoga was mentioned earlier, its so good for de-stressing! Do u have a relaistic healthy expectation to what u want to acheive? Dont look at magazines promoting skelitors.. it brings the best of us down!!! Dont go down the eating disorder Path.... u may get the body u want in the mirror but inside your body, organs heart will be screaming in pain, u wont have that eneergy to play with your kids ur quality of life with deminish, and worst u wont get to see your babies grow up... your body is a temple... its had a house party its guests made a bit of a mess and uve cleaned it up but like most house partys its resulted thers still things u can notice... u will always find a chip in the paintwork, Be patient your doing so well! You have to learn to be happy within yourself dont beet urself up Your doing so well :)

    When feeling down, think of this Quote.... Insted of hiding in a storm.. Learn to Dance in the Rain..

    We r all here for the same reason chin up be positive, Smile, your doing so well :)

    - Hope this helps.. :)
  • chatdude
    chatdude Posts: 39
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    My waist is 28 inches but when it comes to my lower stomach and back it's the most disquting thing ever
    I'm scared to fall into a eating disorder again with how much anger I have on my body

    See yourself through spirit and not through flesh.

    Don't worry so much about your body. It will get old and die. Don't let it drive you crazy.

    Just eat right, exercise, and meditate. If you chose a body that your not too happy about, then it was so for a reason. Probably so you could focus more on being closer to your spirit. Trust me. When it's all said and done you'll ask yourself if you made any progress towards figuring out who you really are. Too much time worrying about a little extra belly fat accomplishes nothing. When you get lemons you make lemonade. Keep your negative thoughts balanced with positive thoughts.
  • Christi6604
    Christi6604 Posts: 245 Member
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    How is your stress level? There are several studies that show stress can lead to excess belly fat.
    soooo high
    like to the point were i have hurt my self :(

    This and the comments about drastic weight loss concerns me and tells me that you may need to be talking with a professional. If you have hurt yourself and you are bordering on ED behaviors, you need more help than any of us can offer. I hope everything works out for you, but I really hope you find the right help too.

    ^^^ THIS. Sounds like you need to work on the mind aspect. Otherwise no "helpful suggestions" will work long term.
  • enyo123
    enyo123 Posts: 172 Member
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    In response to Sarauk2sf taking quoting my remark and saying "this is bad advice when there's an ED involved"

    Who said ED's were involved? And none of my advice was BAD advice. It was different ideas. She can choose whether or not she wants to do them. Most of these are healthy ways of losing weight, and supported by my doctors, nutritionist, and/or my personal trainer friend. IF there was an eating disorder, then NO someone should not be dieting, they should be seeing doctors or nutritionists, if you wanted to get fit though, why not try to work out, clean out your system, and try to cut the crap?

    The OP did. I'd say that they are not a great idea if a person has an ED because it's an extreme nutrition solution being suggested to someone who will take that extreme far beyond the recommendation. The eat straight anything for any amount of time? Just think about it for a minute.

    For a healthy person, perhaps, but the OP has admitted that she is most definitely not emotionally healthy right now.

    OP, please get help from a medical professional. This is far beyond what lay people can truly help you through beyond support.
  • fabafter5
    fabafter5 Posts: 200 Member
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    CODERGAL!!!!!! - Really a package of Oreos in your success pic? Really? :blushing: Good for you!

    Haha first thing I noticed!
  • Shawn8216
    Shawn8216 Posts: 63 Member
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    As many others have said - your number one priority is to get some counseling. You have a body image issue that needs to be address otherwise you will never be happy with your weight loss results.

    1 - seek counseling immediately
    2 - focus on all the positives in your life
    3 - work on feeling good about what you have accomplished so far
    4 - serious strength training....it will change your body!
    5 - make sure you are getting enough calories and hitting your macros to support your work outs
    6 - and someone else suggested re-focusing on different avenues of your life...very good advice. Volunteer work with cancer patients, children that are ill, burn victims, and the elderly will make you put a little bit of belly fat in prospective!!!

    ^^^ THIS IS GREAT ADVICE :) I, too, have suffered with an ED and I know I definitely have body dysmorphic disorder as well since I will literally agrue with my therapist about HOW MUCH weight I gain when my weight has stayed the same for the past 4 months. My belly fat is the thing that literally SHUTS me down and makes me not want to be around people, it's horrible and paraylyzing ESP since this is JUST a part of our bodies. In a way, a very VITAL part of our bodies since so much goes on in our stomachs and not to mention, holds us up with the top and bottom halves of our bodies!

    Please stay away from diet pills. This is probably really hypocritical of me since I'm struggling with those thoughts all the time and gave in, but THEY are NOT worth risking your health. I know that, I'm just addicted to them mentally and I would never want to see another person feel enslaved to that. ED has you already, dont add any more types of ED behaviors.

    If you ever need to talk or vent, definitely feel free to add me and message. Ive been dealing with exactly what you said and just feeling like you're in tears over your weight. It is really important to remember that this may be deeper than what you l ook like and whats going on in your life - basically maybe things are out of your control and having control over your weight is the best thing for you when in actuality, it causes more problems.

    Good luck hon <3:flowerforyou:
  • brooklynjean93
    brooklynjean93 Posts: 11 Member
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    In response to Sarauk2sf taking quoting my remark and saying "this is bad advice when there's an ED involved"

    Who said ED's were involved? And none of my advice was BAD advice. It was different ideas. She can choose whether or not she wants to do them. Most of these are healthy ways of losing weight, and supported by my doctors, nutritionist, and/or my personal trainer friend. IF there was an eating disorder, then NO someone should not be dieting, they should be seeing doctors or nutritionists, if you wanted to get fit though, why not try to work out, clean out your system, and try to cut the crap?

    The OP did. I'd say that they are not a great idea if a person has an ED because it's an extreme nutrition solution being suggested to someone who will take that extreme far beyond the recommendation. The eat straight anything for any amount of time? Just think about it for a minute.

    For a healthy person, perhaps, but the OP has admitted that she is most definitely not emotionally healthy right now.

    OP, please get help from a medical professional. This is far beyond what lay people can truly help you through beyond support.

    Alright, that makes a little more sense. Sorry for the confusion. Yes, if she isn't eating healthy, she should see a nutritional counsellor about that. If she's just eating junk food, then start by eating healthier fruits, vegetables, grains, light meats, you know! The stuff that'll start making her feel better! I'm not saying eat MORE altogether, just, more good stuff. :) do stuff that's good for you. :) enjoy life sweetie! It's too short to worry about a little fat in a spot almost all women have fat. :)

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