Disturbing Relationship Revelation...

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ScarredVampiress
ScarredVampiress Posts: 76
in Motivation and Support
I knew my boyfriend was small, but I didn't think *that* small!

We had a bet going that whomever lost/gained more weight, would win, so he was supposed to gain weight of course, but he didn't train for a long time, so I officially declared him the loser. So, I weighed him in just to check, and he weighs 56kg(123lbs)!!! Especially at 188cm(6'2") that's tiny. TINY. And I measure his waist, maybe his waist got bigger, he used to be 76cm(30") and now I find out he's 69(27").....I'm 172cm(5'8")....

MY BOYFRIEND HAS THE SAME WAIST SAME AS ME!!! How depressing...it's really demotivating.. :(

Anyone gone through that? (even though it's almost ridiculous at 27", so feel free to share if you're bigger than that! )
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  • DerDude
    DerDude Posts: 170
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    I am much bigger than that :-)
  • Assassins_Angel
    Assassins_Angel Posts: 329
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    if it makes you feel better my Fiancés waist is alot smaller than mine
  • bradphil87
    bradphil87 Posts: 617 Member
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    123 at 6'2 seems almost too small. Maybe he should look into that.
  • ScarredVampiress
    ScarredVampiress Posts: 76
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    It IS really small, he's underweight, yeah, is true. His BMI is even below 16. But he does eat and he tries to gain weight but he's also really busy with his work lately and mostly only eats 4 pieces of bread and dinner a day...So he NEEDS to train in order to gain weight but he's a little busy right now and doesn't find it very 'important.' Like it's ONLY about appearence. I don't think he's as suppourtive about me losing weight or..anyone, really.
  • ScarredVampiress
    ScarredVampiress Posts: 76
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    And I mean, I'm not TERRIBLY big. I do think my waist is rather huge, since I'm 5'8"(172) and 130lbs(59kg).
  • mogletdeluxe
    mogletdeluxe Posts: 623 Member
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    If it's any comfort, for the first year of my relationship I was 3 - 4 stone (42 - 56lb) heavier than my partner. Being lighter than him was a serious milestone!
  • Natx83
    Natx83 Posts: 1,308 Member
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    Wow my neck is like 17 inche round... 27 is tiny for male waist!!
  • ScarredVampiress
    ScarredVampiress Posts: 76
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    If it's any comfort, for the first year of my relationship I was 3 - 4 stone (42 - 56lb) heavier than my partner. Being lighter than him was a serious milestone!

    I could only wish to be lighter than him! T^T It's my goal!
  • ScarredVampiress
    ScarredVampiress Posts: 76
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    Wow my neck is like 17 inche round... 27 is tiny for male waist!!

    I know..aren't mens' waists supposed to always be bigger than womens'? :( We're supposed to be smaller in many aspects compared to men! I feel horrid now.
  • militarydreams
    militarydreams Posts: 198 Member
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    he's also really busy with his work lately and mostly only eats 4 pieces of bread and dinner a day...So he NEEDS to train in order to gain weight

    I hate to be a stickler but he might want to read into this. If he's in a calorie defacit then he wont build muscle... if he's an ectomorph then he's going to need to eat a crap load more, my cousin had to eat 1k over his normal allowance for months. Anyway, my point was training isn't going to help if he's not eating.
  • shelbym87
    shelbym87 Posts: 122 Member
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    And I mean, I'm not TERRIBLY big. I do think my waist is rather huge, since I'm 5'8"(172) and 130lbs(59kg).
    Ll
    You aren't big at all! I'm 5'6 & a bit under 120lbs and MY waist is 27in. I was just on a website that said my measurements (34-27-35) fit an "hourglass"type body. Meaning "dramatic indention at waist".


    Edit for wrong weight
  • ScarredVampiress
    ScarredVampiress Posts: 76
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    he's also really busy with his work lately and mostly only eats 4 pieces of bread and dinner a day...So he NEEDS to train in order to gain weight

    I hate to be a stickler but he might want to read into this. If he's in a calorie defacit then he wont build muscle... if he's an ectomorph then he's going to need to eat a crap load more, my cousin had to eat 1k over his normal allowance for months. Anyway, my point was training isn't going to help if he's not eating.

    Yeah, I realise that, but he just says he's busy at this point and isn't concerned about weight or his body right now.
  • SurfinBird1981
    SurfinBird1981 Posts: 517 Member
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    I weigh the same as my fiance....he is 6ft 2 im 5ft 7 ish....bad times :laugh:
  • KitTheRoadie
    KitTheRoadie Posts: 641 Member
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    You shouldn't feel bad!

    It's not as though your boyfriend is smaller than you and healthy! I'm 6' 2" and my CW is 173 and my GW is 165! Anymore than that and I would disappear! :laugh:

    If there is one thing using MFP has taught me, it is how important your food intake is and how it affects your body. 4 pieces of bread and dinner does not sound like enough to eat at all! He's probably permenantly in starvation mode! If he's not careful, he's going to fade away! :noway:

    I hope you can talk some sense in to him and BTW, you look great as you are, don't follow in his footsteps! :flowerforyou:
  • JoeyTajzai
    JoeyTajzai Posts: 1,198 Member
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    I'm lighter then my gf is =\ but its whatevs
  • breskittle
    breskittle Posts: 75 Member
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    You're a girl! Our whole bodies are designed to be different than any males body. Please don't compare yourself to anyone, ESPECIALLY a male that's underweight. At 5'8" and 130 you are a great weight.:smile:
  • ScarredVampiress
    ScarredVampiress Posts: 76
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    ha, thanks. I'm not like him, though. I love food, and he...well, doesn't so much. When I want to eat he's like 'already?' and that alone makes me feel bad...and fat. :( I do lose weight in a healthy way but finding this out, it makes me so depressed, I don't even want to exercise anymore. T^T

    I could deal with him weighing less than me but a MAN to have the same waist as a WOMAN. And my waist is 11in(28cm) smaller than my hips, and 92cm(9in) smaller than my bust..so it's smaller than everything else and yet is huge?!?!
  • lesliejchase
    lesliejchase Posts: 21
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    Oh, don't stress too much! My husband and I are built very similarly. I am naturally short waisted, so I have no such "hourglass" figure. Even though I weigh about 5lbs more than him, we probably have almost the same waist line. My only point is that people are all built differently, so don't feel bad if you don't ever have a smaller waist than him!

    Also, seriously someone get that kid a sandwich. Dude.
  • ScarredVampiress
    ScarredVampiress Posts: 76
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    Oh, don't stress too much! My husband and I are built very similarly. I am naturally short waisted, so I have no such "hourglass" figure. Even though I weigh about 5lbs more than him, we probably have almost the same waist line. My only point is that people are all built differently, so don't feel bad if you don't ever have a smaller waist than him!

    Also, seriously someone get that kid a sandwich. Dude.

    haha. Apparently he doesn't find health 'important right now'. I told him he's feel better and it'd help him through the day better, give him more energy and help him think better, but he just sees it as time being wasted.

    I guess I shouldn't worry about it too much...besides, if I get depressed now, I'll never be smaller than him and only get worse. haha

    Then I shall strive to be smaller than him even more so!!
  • CheezPuff89
    CheezPuff89 Posts: 14 Member
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    If it's any comfort, for the first year of my relationship I was 3 - 4 stone (42 - 56lb) heavier than my partner. Being lighter than him was a serious milestone!

    I could only wish to be lighter than him! T^T It's my goal!

    You realize for you to be lighter than him, at your height, would mean YOU having a bmi of 18 (which is underweight). You need to stop comparing yourself for 1). to a man, and 2.) to a man who by your own admission is seriously underweight. I could see wanting to tone or be more muscular, but 130lbs at 5' 8" is a perfectly healthy weight, why are you trying to lose?

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