I need a hug and some advice

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  • lkcuts
    lkcuts Posts: 224
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    The biggest thing I learned was , to have a meaningful relationship, you both have to love each other . One can't love and the other who does not, but don't want to hurt the other person, continues to muddle through the relationship to not be the bad person. maybe they are hoping there will be something to trigger feelings, I don't know.
    You are better off , to heal, over time, to get away and stay away..Just talking from experience. If you can't talk it out, Don't ignore the red flags he throws you will know because when they are thrown, you will be left confused and not understanding why they did what they did if they really want to be with you,he is saying one thing and doing another..RED FLAG. Its time to move on...Oh and btw.. big hug I sympathize with your situation and hope you can sort out what you need to do.
  • MissTomGettingThin
    MissTomGettingThin Posts: 776 Member
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    :flowerforyou:
  • sa11yjane
    sa11yjane Posts: 491 Member
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    You know, I believe that if someone really is Mr Right then one would not have trials and tribulations and 'games' along the way. He probably is right, you are possibly security blankets to each other and it will be really really hard letting go of someone who has played such a big part in your life. But by giving so much time to him, you are not giving yourself the opportunity to meet that one person with whom everything will just seem sooooo right. Believe me, you are a long time married, hang on until that really special man comes along. Your current man sounds like Mr will-do...but I have a feeling that there is someone more right for you out there. Go and open up a carton of Haagen Daaz or Ben & Jerry's, crack open a bottle of wine, allow the tears and get ready for a long grieving period. It will be worth it in the long run. Lots of love, hugs and kisses to you and I wish you well xxxxx
  • zazzyrenee
    zazzyrenee Posts: 5 Member
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    It is okay to cry your eyes out. At some point it is better for you to let go if this relationship is truly not going anywhere. For women sleeping with men there is a huge risk to take because we are programmed through our chemical responses to fall in love with someone we are sleeping with on a consistent basis (this is a general statement cheaters and whatnot aside). My advice for any woman who is single is to read a book called "have the relationship you want." It was a great book and taught me about myself and how to be confident and self assured.

    1. I closed the door on my previous relationship that was not going anywhere and actually kept me in chains for 3 years even though I couldn't see it at the time.
    2. I BALLED my eyes out and okay I prayed to God to help me through it.
    3. I read the book.
    4. I was feeling angry and just needed to let loose for a night. I went to Karaoke with my stepsister and Voila, the met the man of my dreams.

    I know it sounds stupid that I attribute finding my guy because of the book, but I realized all the mistakes I was making and the bad vibes I was sending out and that stuff. And I found this book because it was advertised on facebook (haha!). It was an e-book and you can go to the website they have and just get the free newsletter if you would like. Rori Raye - havetherelationshipyouwant.

    Everything will be okay. Big HUGS!
  • AlicynH
    AlicynH Posts: 201 Member
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    You deserve to be loved. Find someone who will treat you with respect. You need someone who will love you with his whole heart, not just when he wants sex. Sending hugs your way. :flowerforyou:
  • zazzyrenee
    zazzyrenee Posts: 5 Member
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    Just a little more advice, if you read my other post, the reason why I was in chains for 3 years is because I held onto someone as friends without the intimacy. They were my own chains. I believe in you. I believe you can let this person go completely. The band-aide effect ~ rip it off completely, it might hurt less than going piece by piece.

    I believe in you. Hugs.
  • AlicynH
    AlicynH Posts: 201 Member
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    My friend had this on her FB page and I just had to share it with you.

    To all the girls who are in a hurry to have a boyfriend or get married, a piece of Biblical advice: “Ruth patiently waited for her mate Boaz”. While you are waiting on YOUR Boaz, don’t settle for any ofhis relatives; Broke-az, Po-az, Lyin-az, Cheatin-az, Dumb-az, Drunk-az, Cheap-az, Lockedup-az, Goodfornothin-az, Lazy-az, and especially his cousin Beatinyo-az. Wait on your Boaz and make sure he respects Yoaz.

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