Corn used my man-parts as a speedbag.
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Sidesteal
Posts: 5,510 Member
Now that I have your attention -
Every so often I'll make one of these random bits of info. How about now.
You don't need to eat clean.
You don't need to avoid white bread or potatoes or beans or rice or _____________ (insert food here) unless you've got an intolerance/allergy/medical condition.
You don't need to eat breakfast to get your metabolism started.
You probably don't need to pay any attention to GI.
Your metabolism doesn't get kick-started and you don't rev it up.
Eating frequently is fine but it doesn't "boost your metabolism".
Don't waste your money on Raspberry Keytones and you should probably turn off Dr. Oz.
You are not toning.
You will not bulk up, ladies.
You also don't "gain muscle really easily". Yes, YOU.
Low carbing is not dangerous.
Low carbing is not metabolically superior.
You can eat food before bed.
You can eat food IN bed.
There is no specific time at which eating will cause you to gain fat.
The little pink dumbbells do not constitute "lifting weights".
That glass of blended up "juice" that you're replacing your meals with, probably isn't "cleansing" any "toxins".
"Hot Pants" don't make you lose fat, although they may make your wallet lighter.
You don't need to burn off that bowl of cereal or piece of chicken.
You don't need to worry about whether you're burning carbs or fat.
You don't need to worry about how much fat you burned during your workout, or how much muscle you gained during that set of bosu-ball dumbbell flies.
You don't "shock your body"
You don't "confuse your mucles"
Stop switching up your lifting program. How about stick to something and add weight to the bar.
Just because you saw it in a documentary doesn't mean it's a good idea or even remotely research-based.
You don't need to zig-zag or carb cycle or do the 17 day butt wash or the cabbage donkey stew diet.
2 weeks is not a plateau.
.
.
.
.
.
Start here:
1) Eat within a reasonable caloric intake for your goals.
2) Consume adequate protein and fat.
3) Consume at least enough carbs to allow you to train with intensity.
(And can you just use some common sense with food selection?)
4) Lift weights
5) Get rest.
6) Repeat
7) And quit worrying about all the other crap.
Be patient.
Every so often I'll make one of these random bits of info. How about now.
You don't need to eat clean.
You don't need to avoid white bread or potatoes or beans or rice or _____________ (insert food here) unless you've got an intolerance/allergy/medical condition.
You don't need to eat breakfast to get your metabolism started.
You probably don't need to pay any attention to GI.
Your metabolism doesn't get kick-started and you don't rev it up.
Eating frequently is fine but it doesn't "boost your metabolism".
Don't waste your money on Raspberry Keytones and you should probably turn off Dr. Oz.
You are not toning.
You will not bulk up, ladies.
You also don't "gain muscle really easily". Yes, YOU.
Low carbing is not dangerous.
Low carbing is not metabolically superior.
You can eat food before bed.
You can eat food IN bed.
There is no specific time at which eating will cause you to gain fat.
The little pink dumbbells do not constitute "lifting weights".
That glass of blended up "juice" that you're replacing your meals with, probably isn't "cleansing" any "toxins".
"Hot Pants" don't make you lose fat, although they may make your wallet lighter.
You don't need to burn off that bowl of cereal or piece of chicken.
You don't need to worry about whether you're burning carbs or fat.
You don't need to worry about how much fat you burned during your workout, or how much muscle you gained during that set of bosu-ball dumbbell flies.
You don't "shock your body"
You don't "confuse your mucles"
Stop switching up your lifting program. How about stick to something and add weight to the bar.
Just because you saw it in a documentary doesn't mean it's a good idea or even remotely research-based.
You don't need to zig-zag or carb cycle or do the 17 day butt wash or the cabbage donkey stew diet.
2 weeks is not a plateau.
.
.
.
.
.
Start here:
1) Eat within a reasonable caloric intake for your goals.
2) Consume adequate protein and fat.
3) Consume at least enough carbs to allow you to train with intensity.
(And can you just use some common sense with food selection?)
4) Lift weights
5) Get rest.
6) Repeat
7) And quit worrying about all the other crap.
Be patient.
48
Replies
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I
you and this post. 0 -
You my friend, are my hero for the day.
Matter of fact, since its almost over...you can be my hero for tomorrow too.
Well done.0 -
right on man!!!!! great and true post0
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I love this!
Thanks for posting.0 -
This is all that needs to be said! Love it!:drinker:0
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Oh thank god. I just ate peanut butter on toast. In bed. Glad to know I haven't done any major damage! :bigsmile:0
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Hahah love it.1
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0
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This bears a shocking resemblance to common sense. I am appalled.2
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I really need some sleep .... the heading looked like gibberish & I clcked on anyway LOL
Thanks for sharing ...... especially the part about eating food IN bed ..... just gotta remember to log it :drinker:1 -
I you and this post.
I you too!
Um.....three-way?
0 -
Probably a good reason you were my first mfp friend (besides my wife).0
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THANK YOU! I pretty much say this in just about every thread, but there are so many people who have no sense on this site....0
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Thank you! I'd like to add... You are not suddenly allergic to gluten.2
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Yay! Simple. Smart.0
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Phew, he didn't mention that the 79 day lemon juice cinnamon detox diet is bad. We are safe guys.2
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Phew, he didn't mention that the 79 day lemon juice cinnamon detox diet is bad. We are safe guys.
^ There's a reason he's standing near a toilet all the time.
0 -
THANK YOU!0
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Are some people only washing their butt 17 times a month? Or are you saying that butt-washing is unnecessary entirely?
Quite a presumption; I would say that butt-washing is right up there with ball-washing in importance.1 -
Detoxxing is a full time jobPhew, he didn't mention that the 79 day lemon juice cinnamon detox diet is bad. We are safe guys.
^ There's a reason he's standing near a toilet all the time.0
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