Ideas on How to Get REAL-LIFE Friends

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MaryPhillips90
MaryPhillips90 Posts: 236 Member
in Chit-Chat
My friends are few and far between and have slowly deminished over the years. Co-workers are the closest friends I have and that's the extent of it.
I really don't know HOW to go about finding new friends, but I know I will have to venture out alone.
Does anyone have any ideas on how to meet new people?
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Replies

  • Il_DaniD_lI
    Il_DaniD_lI Posts: 1,593 Member
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    Girls bathroom at the bar. I go in by myself and leave with a new BFF every time.
  • havegoodgetgive
    havegoodgetgive Posts: 26
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    gym, church, hobby groups
  • ScottyNoHotty
    ScottyNoHotty Posts: 1,957 Member
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    I prefer stalking....
  • Unknown
    Unknown
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    no idea
  • MaryPhillips90
    MaryPhillips90 Posts: 236 Member
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    Yeah, the bar would be GREAT ...if there were some around! That would entail going to one by myself, though. Does anyone do that? Lol

    I don't really do the whole church thing...
  • _Stampede_
    _Stampede_ Posts: 66
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    Meeting people at a bar seems perfectly logical.
  • NYactor1
    NYactor1 Posts: 9,642 Member
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    www.meetup.org
  • viscumin
    viscumin Posts: 12 Member
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    You could try Meet Up. It's a site where people organize groups and meet for events. it's a good way top meet people.
  • BigDaddyRonnie
    BigDaddyRonnie Posts: 506 Member
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    I am an introverted extrovert myself. (if that makes any sense)

    I usually don't like just walking up to/talking to someone out of the blue, but will will talk to someone if it is done to me. I hear what you are saying. It can be difficult.

    I went to a bar alone...doesn't work too well for a guy. The guys in the bathroom that want to be your friends have other things on their mind, so that is huge NO-NO for me.

    You do need to put yourself out there, or make yourself available and it happens. When forced, I can say it doesn't. Do you have a hobby that you like to do, that my have events and such? Stalking works, but you then might have friends on the inside of a bar scene if you catch my drift...
  • Il_DaniD_lI
    Il_DaniD_lI Posts: 1,593 Member
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    Yeah, the bar would be GREAT ...if there were some around! That would entail going to one by myself, though. Does anyone do that? Lol

    <-- this girl does
  • misskerouac
    misskerouac Posts: 2,242 Member
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    My husband and I are going through the SAME thing.
    And we always just end up hanging out by ourselves or with my sister and her husband.

    We've hung out with co-workers outside of work here and there but nothing like a "Real" friend.

    Mine have all moved away or are still REALLY into the bar scene (they are quite a few years younger and it's just not my thing anymore)

    I have no advice for you, but just wanted to let you know you aren't alone! lol
  • SVCat
    SVCat Posts: 1,483 Member
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    When I got divorced a couple of years ago, I lost all my friends. My friends were all married and their wives were not about to let me be a negative influence in their lives. I didn't blame them because I certainly would have distracted them with my lifestyle.

    I had to be completely open and friendlier than otherwise I would be. I started inviting coworkers out for a round or for a barbeque at the house and I would have them invite a friend or two. Over time I was able to forge new relationships.

    It really just comes down to being yourself, being open, but also stepping outside your comfort zone and just hoping that someone will actually be a true, real-life friend. Those are very few and far between, but it starts with you being a friend to them...even when they may not merit your friendship at times.
  • emmy3111
    emmy3111 Posts: 482 Member
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    I moved to a small town just under two years ago, and I have the same problem. I am "friends" with a few of the people I work with, but only during work hours... I would love to meet some people to be friends with outside of work, but it's so hard.

    I totally know what you're going through.
  • inside_lap
    inside_lap Posts: 738 Member
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    Put yourself out there. The more your seen, the more people interact with you. So join a gym, become a regular at a new spot (be it a coffee shop, pool, etc), explore a hobby you've always wanted to do, or joint a single adventure club/rec league of some sort. Good luck!!!
  • Behavior_Modification
    Behavior_Modification Posts: 24,482 Member
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    3 years ago I answered a Craig's List ad from the "Activities" section. There was a 27 year old woman in my area looking for someone to walk/jog/bike with and even though it was only a few lines, it sounded like I wrote the ad. I had to respond! She and I are now the best of friends.
  • _the_feniks_
    _the_feniks_ Posts: 3,443 Member
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    Yeah, the bar would be GREAT ...if there were some around! That would entail going to one by myself, though. Does anyone do that? Lol

    <-- this girl does

    <-- so does this guy
  • Behavior_Modification
    Behavior_Modification Posts: 24,482 Member
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    Girls bathroom at the bar. I go in by myself and leave with a new BFF every time.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    So true!
  • theesfield
    theesfield Posts: 31 Member
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    I teach bellydance class. It seems that there are always a core of girls who tend to bond at the classes. I have also met some really good friends who have taken my classes. So, I'm going to vote for a fitness class.
  • PittShkr
    PittShkr Posts: 1,000 Member
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    Click windows start icon, .... shut down computer......
  • maricash
    maricash Posts: 280 Member
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    I moved to a new city a few years ago and have met most of my friends here through activities -- volunteering, meet-up groups, book groups, taking classes in one thing or another. Finding group activities that you enjoy and can feel comfortable attending alone helps, especially if the same people come back a lot.

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