"you don't need to lose weight"

Options
I keep getting told by almost everyone I know things like: You don't need to lose weight, your fine. Lose weight? where? There's no way you need to lose that much weight. You look fine as you are. Your skinny, what are you talking about?

Anyone else have these issues? It's not that they are REALLY meaning to make me feel bad, but It's frustrating having people think I'm an idiot for trying to lose weight.

I also have a lot of bigger family members that keep telling me I'm super skinny as it is, which isn't true at all.

Just wondering how everyone else is handling these kinds of situations. I'm losing the weight for myself, and I know I won't be happy until I get down to my goal weight, so I really don't care that they think that stuff. But it does get kind of motivational when I hear these things.
«134567

Replies

  • BabyGrl726
    BabyGrl726 Posts: 102 Member
    Options
    I understand. In my culture/background/family it is not cute to be skinny or as thin as I am aiming to be. Women in my family have hips butt thighs and boobs for days...so for me to want to erase all of that from my body is absurd to my family and some of my friends.

    Again, you are in this for the right reasons...yourself. You just have to remember that everyday. Plus some people may just be saying it to thwart your efforts toward you goal. I have had that happen to. This is why I keep MFP separate from fb. Everyone on here is working towards the same goal. They may not be where you are and that is why they would be happy with the body you have....but ultimately if you are not happy then only YOU know what you need to do to get there.

    Good Luck with your efforts and goals! GET HAPPY!!!!
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    Options
    stop telling people. its none of their business.
  • KiltFuPanda
    KiltFuPanda Posts: 576 Member
    Options
    I get a different form of this all the time: "You don't need to lose weight - you're all muscle, not fat."

    I just think to myself, "If you think I'm good enough now - wait until I've reached MY goal. Then look again."
  • sthrnchick
    sthrnchick Posts: 771
    Options
    I am just starting to get this...and it's usually from my super fit, thin friends...I have NEVER been thin, and at least 20 pounds away from being my target weight...I think people have good intentions in general..but having never seen us thinner...they have a hard time dealing with the changes.

    I think you look AMAZING now...but if you want to lose more, go for it!
  • DivaJadelyn
    DivaJadelyn Posts: 280 Member
    Options
    Quote from a Coworker (granted this is a cultural difference but I still found it rude) "Your weight suits you. You don't need to lose weight" I even tried explaining it's not just about looks but about health for my future with my kids but he just refused to listen to me.
  • RachelVon
    RachelVon Posts: 74 Member
    Options
    I just started to get this, only from one person so far, but she was like "how much more weight are you trying to loose" in a tone that made me think...oh crap, I hope this stuff isnt going to start coming from everyone! I just barely got into the healthy bmi range but the healthy weight range for me is between 118-159.6 & I would personally like to be towards the lighter side of it, not to mention I'm still a good 30 lbs heavier than I was in high school

    So don't listen to people who say that, it usually stems from Jealousy because you are doing such a great job!!
  • Cliffslosinit
    Cliffslosinit Posts: 5,044 Member
    Options
    You are young....i wish i would have come to some realization sooner.
    Good for you. Do for your health and be true to yourself.
    Wish the best!!!
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
    Options
    stop telling people. its none of their business.

    QFT. In my experience, people don't respond well when others decide to change their lives and get healthier, because it makes them reflect back on their own life choices. Think of their responses as them actually talking to themselves. 'You don't need to lose weight" means "I don't want to work at diet and exercise right now"
  • Hezzietiger1
    Hezzietiger1 Posts: 1,256 Member
    Options
    people that say it to me are...

    1. fat
    2. lazy
    3. want me to go out with them that day/night

    I generally just say.. umm, but I do. Thanks.

    Hezz
  • KaidaKantri
    KaidaKantri Posts: 401
    Options
    stop telling people. its none of their business.

    It may not be their business. But as friends and family I want their support. Most of this is from the family, and they are bigger. My main problem is that they say that stuff, and I keep getting offered junk food, and I keep saying no and they keep going "But I don't want it" I explain to them that I'm on a diet so I don't want that food. that's usually when I get the Oh you don't need to lose weight crap. It helps to make them aware of the weight loss as it HAS helped the offers of junk food. Just not the other stuff
  • KaidaKantri
    KaidaKantri Posts: 401
    Options
    I understand. In my culture/background/family it is not cute to be skinny or as thin as I am aiming to be. Women in my family have hips butt thighs and boobs for days...so for me to want to erase all of that from my body is absurd to my family and some of my friends.

    Again, you are in this for the right reasons...yourself. You just have to remember that everyday. Plus some people may just be saying it to thwart your efforts toward you goal. I have had that happen to. This is why I keep MFP separate from fb. Everyone on here is working towards the same goal. They may not be where you are and that is why they would be happy with the body you have....but ultimately if you are not happy then only YOU know what you need to do to get there.

    Good Luck with your efforts and goals! GET HAPPY!!!!

    Actually most of the people who do say this are bigger than I am and are jealous that I'm not obese, and they are. But I've heard of some cultural backgrounds where men like their women huge. I don't get it, and I think it's super unhealthy to be like that, but I understand that it's a cultural thing. I would assume that it would be tough if your in a cultural that is somewhat like that. Good luck to you and thanks for the support!
  • Lisseth03
    Lisseth03 Posts: 518 Member
    Options
    yep, been there. in the end it isn't about whether you NEED to or not, it's about being active and living a healthy life. I guess people just don't understand that really. idk?
  • KaidaKantri
    KaidaKantri Posts: 401
    Options
    I get a different form of this all the time: "You don't need to lose weight - you're all muscle, not fat."

    I just think to myself, "If you think I'm good enough now - wait until I've reached MY goal. Then look again."

    I love the way you think! :)
  • KaidaKantri
    KaidaKantri Posts: 401
    Options
    I am just starting to get this...and it's usually from my super fit, thin friends...I have NEVER been thin, and at least 20 pounds away from being my target weight...I think people have good intentions in general..but having never seen us thinner...they have a hard time dealing with the changes.

    I think you look AMAZING now...but if you want to lose more, go for it!

    Yeah, I do look pretty good for my weight. But my biggest issue is that I like a lot of the tighter clothing, and I can see the fat sticking out plainly, and it bothers me. In my profile pic It doesn't show as much fat as the dress actually does show because I have a what do you call them.. Thing that smooths out the fat and makes you look thinner on. Thanks though, I appreciate it ^^
  • AmyRhubarb
    AmyRhubarb Posts: 6,890 Member
    Options
    I used to hear that all the time! And here I am two years later and 24lbs lighter, and no one has told me I'm too skinny after losing that much! :tongue: My answer was always that I just wear it well - which was fairly accurate I guess - most of my fat is on my midsection, easy to hide under my clothes as long as I was covered from the knees up! Haha! All my shorts were longer, just above the knee at the shortest. No dresses, and I was beginning to shy away from tank tops.

    Just ignore those who say that. If anyone says anything to me now (which is rare since I've been at it for a couple of years now, so they're used to it), I make sure they understand that this is no diet - this is my healthier lifestyle, choosing to be fit and healthy, and I say I'm trying to lose the fat rather than the weight - seems to go over better somehow.

    Of course there's always the shock value method, and it crossed my mind once or twice when someone asked where I needed to lose weight - "want me to strip down and show ya?" :laugh:
  • KaidaKantri
    KaidaKantri Posts: 401
    Options
    I just started to get this, only from one person so far, but she was like "how much more weight are you trying to loose" in a tone that made me think...oh crap, I hope this stuff isnt going to start coming from everyone! I just barely got into the healthy bmi range but the healthy weight range for me is between 118-159.6 & I would personally like to be towards the lighter side of it, not to mention I'm still a good 30 lbs heavier than I was in high school

    So don't listen to people who say that, it usually stems from Jealousy because you are doing such a great job!!

    Yeah, I get that too! My healthy weight is 112-149lbs would be anywhere in the normal. However, I feel that if I drop below 120 which I've decided to use as my overall goal weight, it would be unhealthy. But I may end up stick around 135lbs because I like to have a little bit of fat left around my tummy.
  • KaidaKantri
    KaidaKantri Posts: 401
    Options
    yep, been there. in the end it isn't about whether you NEED to or not, it's about being active and living a healthy life. I guess people just don't understand that really. idk?

    I really don't think they do. I've looked around the area I live in, and I swear finding someone who is not overweight is like finding a needle in a haystack. I'm not joking. I just think it's crazy, and it does help to motivate myself to go further.
  • delonda1
    delonda1 Posts: 525 Member
    Options
    I get told everyday that I am going overboard or need to stop. And well usually i am like whatever but it does bother me especially when people try to swear to me I dont eat. I EAT ALL THE TIME. I loss weight because I made healthier eating choices and my workout schedule is different.

    Have to remember most people in the US and well the world are overweight so the ideal of healthy and skinny are twisted. Take it with a grain of salt and when you are comfortable in your own skin it will be fine
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    Options
    stop telling people. its none of their business.

    It may not be their business. But as friends and family I want their support. Most of this is from the family, and they are bigger. My main problem is that they say that stuff, and I keep getting offered junk food, and I keep saying no and they keep going "But I don't want it" I explain to them that I'm on a diet so I don't want that food. that's usually when I get the Oh you don't need to lose weight crap. It helps to make them aware of the weight loss as it HAS helped the offers of junk food. Just not the other stuff

    you can't change people. you can't make them give you support. just say no and be happy you are making the right choice.
  • KaidaKantri
    KaidaKantri Posts: 401
    Options
    people that say it to me are...

    1. fat
    2. lazy
    3. want me to go out with them that day/night

    I generally just say.. umm, but I do. Thanks.

    Hezz

    Haha yeah, I can see that! I think that is what happens with the people i know too.