Am I being to harsh?

Beastette

I'm not the type of person who wants to start a confrontation, and I really don't want to start an argument...

Then you may have to find a new friend.

Seriously, if you can't talk about it, what are you going to do? Act in such a way that your friend with intuitively guess what you are feeling, then correct her behavior according to guidelines she thinks you might want?

And wait... when she's wrong with her guessing, she should be expected to apologize for not guessing what you want?

TOO MANY PEOPLE ARE AFRAID TO SIMPLY AND HONESTLY ASK FOR WHAT THEY WANT. Some don't really know what they want, most are too afraid to be honest about it.

Why are you asking if you are being harsh? Harsh for what? For posting this story on the forum? What have you said to your friend?

Quit waiting around for an apology and be honest and direct. Just because you have a set of social courtesy rules doesn't mean the rest of the world will have the same ones (or any at all). I don't say that lightly, as I've been in your shoes and had to accept that my standards of behavior aren't necessarily shared by the rest of the world.

I have to assume you want to be friends with this person, otherwise you'd just find a new friend. Be direct. Be honest. You might have to get out of your comfort zone. Start with some version of "This is what I want..."

QFT