Talk about a slap in the face. Motivation depleted.

h2oophelia

When we are fat, and our SO says we are beautiful, they're lying.

It's so sickening to think that someone can work so hard to improve themselves and then someone else can come along and say something like this, making us all believe that unless we are perfect, we can never really be beautiful to anyone else.

It is very narrow minded of whoever originally posted this comment to say that someone else could not honestly be attracted to a different body than the skinny body that the commentator is attracted to.

"It is the mind which creates the world around us, and even though we stand side by side in the same meadow, my eyes will never see what is beheld by yours, my heart will never stir to the emotions with which yours is touched."

Loving the appearance of someone who is heavy exists. Love that transcends a persons outward appearance exists.

To the person who did post that comment, I'm sure that you believe that you are just being honest with the statement that you posted, and that you aren't trying to be malicious or do any harm, but you have the viewpoint of one singular person.

Your statement has more of an impact than you realize, so please be careful.

^^^^THIS x100

I couldn't have said it better myself.....or said it with as much grace. In fact, I have a few choice words...but I'll refrain. <thinking happy thoughts>

half_moon

I had to watch my mom date (and almost marry) a guy who constantly threw in her face that she wasn't attractive enough for him, because she wasn't as skinny as she used to be. He wasn't so upfront about it like your boyfriend, but he bought expensive clothing like Armani and Ralph Lauren in a size 6. She's a size 16. This man was manipulative and treated her like *kitten*. No one deserves that.

I've read a lot of comments in this thread saying that your boyfriend isn't shallow. He's just telling you the truth as a way to push you to your goals. Here's the thing, you cannot lose weight for anybody but yourself. Your intention may have been to please your husband or to "wow" your high school friends at a reunion, but at the end of the day, it's all about you. You can't please everybody.

My father did this to my mother when they were still married. Disgusting.

StarvingDiva

People will reveal to you their true nature when you let them. Often times being quiet and letting them talk, reveals a lot. The truth of the matter is that if you were heavier when you started dating him like you stated, than what was his motivation in the first place to date you? If he isn't attracted to you, why date you? Was it to have the upper hand in the relationship? To keep you down so that he felt superior?
I feel as though if you lost weight, he would just find something else that he wasn't "attracted" too. If you complete X he then will suddenly be attracted to you, what about if you get heavy again, then what? When people reveal what their true character is. BELIEVE THEM.

Bahet

Skinny =/= beautiful and fat =/= ugly. Anyone who says only skinny people can be attractive is shallow. If they only find skinny people attractive that's fine. That's their preference. But to insinuate or even outright state that no one can find a heavier person attractive unless they are some sort of chubby chaser is completely assinine. Plus, you are 145 lbs. Depending on your hight and build that might be slightly overweight, perfectly ideal, or even slightly underweight.

rozsbluejay

Sounds like something I went through. I had an ex best friend (that I still miss) I knew him for more than 2 years. At some point we were getting extremely close. One day he was just too quiet, I got him to tell me and he was starting to get teary. He said, "I see you, and I look inside you and I see the perfect you...sometimes I think that we could be together, but you're too big." We had a big argument and by the end of it I tell him that he had to say something nice to me. He said, "You really are beautiful, I really do like you. You're perfect for me."

By the end of it I was confused, How can someone like you and tell you that you are the most beautiful person in the world to them -even then perfect but not enough because you're too big?

By the middle of the next year he was already starting to imply that he wanted me to lose weight because he wanted to be with me. It hurt so much. We slowly stopped talking to each other.