Unfriended for being too fat?

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Replies

  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    Doesn't matter, if that's how she feels about it you don't want her as a pal anyway.

    Fact is that we're all here to have our own experience. You know what you want your experience to look like and can make decisions based on that, and so can she. Is it worse that she made a decision that falls within her desired experience without making a stink about it or that you came onto the motivation and support board to talk about her?
  • SaundraU
    SaundraU Posts: 77
    What a jerk, hopefully they relapse and binge on some Popeye's, extra spicy.

    hmmmm that's real supportive. While her motives are awful two wrongs don't make a right.
  • EmpressOfJudgment
    EmpressOfJudgment Posts: 1,162 Member
    Don't let it bug you too much. Everyone has the right to make their experience here their own. I can sort of understand where she is coming from. From the opposite perspective, I have a difficult time relating to people who only need to lose a few pounds. However, it was a ****ty way to go about it. Don't let it get under your skin too long. Feel what you feel about it, and then shake it off and go about your day.
  • jennco3
    jennco3 Posts: 72 Member
    I think most of us are on here for the same reasons. To reach a goal and better ourselves. So there is no difference between needed to shed 20-25lbs or 200lbs. I really feel sorry for that person. I hope they find their brain.
  • lvpthemvp
    lvpthemvp Posts: 266 Member
    That is her loss and her fears. . . would love to have you as a friend.
  • jboccio90
    jboccio90 Posts: 644 Member
    We are all here (or should be) for one thing and that improve our health.
    Whether it is 100 pounds,10 pounds or to gain weight we all share that common goal.

    Sorry that happened to you.
  • Josie_lifting_cats
    Josie_lifting_cats Posts: 949 Member
    Sheesh.... I don't understand this. I think we can all support each other even if we aren't on the same journey.
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    i unfriend people all the time for not eating the way i do. if they're not active. if they have views i don't agree with, etc.

    i don't see the big deal.
  • ChristyRunStarr
    ChristyRunStarr Posts: 1,600 Member
    I'll be your friend and I don't care how much you have to lose lol Some people just make me go really?
  • mmachick2011
    mmachick2011 Posts: 55 Member
    I notice on MFP that there is a distinction between those who have 20lbs or less to lose, the people in between, and then the obese people who have 100lbs or more to lose. I don't really give a crap anymore. I'm on here to lose weight, plan on losing it, and if you can't support that, leave me the hell alone.

    Well said!! I have to admit, for people joining a site called MyFitnessPal... there is a lot of negativity to other members about weight and health!
  • AstyPasty
    AstyPasty Posts: 70 Member
    :noway: bah! Her loss, everyone is different I suppose but, like everyone else says, just shrug your shoulders and move on hon :flowerforyou:
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    so wait you friended her even though she said she didnt want friends who had a lot of weight to lose and are surprised that she unfriended you once you told her you had about 100 pounds to lose?

    sounds like she told you who she was in the friend request and you ignored that
  • CatchMom11
    CatchMom11 Posts: 462 Member
    The more I try to understand people and their actions, the more they confuse me.
    Dont sweat it, you've got a bunch of support and friendship here.
    Add me if you'd like :)

    ^^^Like^^^^
    OMG - I couldn't agree more! I don't know why some people have to be so negative.
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,286 Member
    All I can say is wow, too. :noway: I guess it takes all kinds to make MFP, too.
  • moxiecowgirl
    moxiecowgirl Posts: 291 Member
    That's a silly reason to unfriend someone. If you want support regardless of your weight and a friend with a tolerant point of view, I'm available! :flowerforyou:
  • rm830
    rm830 Posts: 531 Member
    What a jerk, hopefully they relapse and binge on some Popeye's, extra spicy.

    hehehe that's why we're friends! U rock! Seriously that person was a jerk, we all have different end goals but we're all here for the same reason..to get healthy!
  • ShakeyMD
    ShakeyMD Posts: 59 Member
    Looks like you dodged a bullet on that one. I have a feeling that probably isn't her only character flaw. Pray for her and move on. xoxxo Percy

    ^^This.
  • SyntonicGarden
    SyntonicGarden Posts: 944 Member
    I notice on MFP that there is a distinction between those who have 20lbs or less to lose, the people in between, and then the obese people who have 100lbs or more to lose. I don't really give a crap anymore. I'm on here to lose weight, plan on losing it, and if you can't support that, leave me the hell alone.

    ^^^ She's right...

    I'm in the 20 -25 lbs group and the only thing that matters to me is that the people that I add as friends are

    1) committed to healthier choices, regardless of their start weight (No "shakes only" or "500 calorie limits")
    2) supportive of their other friends
    3) patient with themselves <-- KEY
    4) don't throw fits if they "mess up" or have a bad day

    It doesn't matter to me if my Pals are trying to lose 10 lbs or 100 lbs, as long as they're trying to be the healthiest versions of themselves that they can be. It's nice to see friends of all sizes hit their goals or benchmarks.

    Let this other person go. That "friendship" was not meant to be. Pray for her (as another person suggested) if that's your thing. Genuinely wish her the best if praying's not your thing (I'm certainly not judging), wish her no ill, and instead, work to surround yourself with optimistic people who are aligned with being positive, focused, and encouraging.
  • Annette_rose
    Annette_rose Posts: 427 Member
    People are unusual huh! I have friends who want to gain muscle on here, friends with perfect bodies that I so wish I had, and friends who need to lose various amounts of weight. I love all of it!!! We are all here for each other and that is what counts; whether we are trying to build muscle, lose weight, whatever. I am sorry and try not to let it bother you :flowerforyou:
  • noellyenciso
    noellyenciso Posts: 26
    I notice on MFP that there is a distinction between those who have 20lbs or less to lose, the people in between, and then the obese people who have 100lbs or more to lose. I don't really give a crap anymore. I'm on here to lose weight, plan on losing it, and if you can't support that, leave me the hell alone.


    I totally agree!!!!!
  • kiminikimkim
    kiminikimkim Posts: 746 Member
    I am also guilty of unfriending members when I see them only eating 400 calories a day or only eating fast food.

    But I always include a message on their page: "Sorry I can't be part of your journey towards weight loss but I wish you all the success in the world, good luck!"

    We just don't have anything in common. I am on a lifestyle journey, not a quick fix journey with heath problems down the line.
  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
    "B1tches ain't sh1t" - Dr. Dre.



    In this case, it's true. Don't sweat it OP.
  • DMUND
    DMUND Posts: 299 Member
    As Stephanie Tanner would say on Full House....HOW RUDE!!!! Feel free to add me :D
  • the_prettty1
    the_prettty1 Posts: 40
    I'll be your friend! They're an ahole. I have about 35-40 to go!
  • paleirishmother
    paleirishmother Posts: 242
    Maybe there are other reasons, maybe she made a group of some sort? Why get offended, it's a stranger on a website.
  • CatchMom11
    CatchMom11 Posts: 462 Member
    i unfriend people all the time for not eating the way i do. if they're not active. if they have views i don't agree with, etc.

    i don't see the big deal.

    I can see unfriending people who aren't active, or have different views, etc. But because they've got more to lose than you do, that's childish. I can see unfriending someone who eats crappy and then has to work their tail off to burn those calories off because obviously, they're not taking this seriously. Or someone who thinks starvation mode is the way to go... I get that do. So I do have to ask (and hopefully you'll answer); What do you mean by "not eating the way I do?"
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    People are mean. I'm sorry that happened to you. But, honestly, you are better off. Everyone on here is trying to work on, or work through, something. I've seen people on here posting about weight loss, weight gain, balance, breakups, makeups, work, school - essentially, all the stuff that makes us human. It's weird to me that someone would want to so strictly categorize who they want to associate with based on how much they need to lose.

    There are some really awesome people here who just want to be positive and helpful and those are the people worth spending your time on.
  • CynthiaElise
    CynthiaElise Posts: 262 Member
    The intent on getting healthy and taking care of ourselves is the same no matter what the unique number is that each of us want to lose. It was her loss. I'd be happy to be your friend :)
  • Sassy922
    Sassy922 Posts: 399 Member
    I've often wondered if that is why the friend requests I send out don't get accepted. I send a message with my request and every thing. *shrug* OH Well. Their loss.
  • Eve23
    Eve23 Posts: 2,352 Member
    I think it just goes to show that people can be pretty narrow minded when a number can make a judgement of someones worth. Quite sad:cry:

    Life is a journey and we all have hills to climb. Fear cannot rule our journey, if we are going to learn from it. I hope she will learn from her fear some day.

    Don't let it affect your own journey we are all on this one together.

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