Stop calling me too skinny!
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I think you should get your body fat checked by a professional to see where you really are.0
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I went through a similar experience, but mine was due to an eating disorder.
as long as you know you are HEALTHY, don't let what others say bring you down. However, i do think it is easy to get into a grey area, where health is determined by the number on the scale. Even though i need to lose weight now (I gained a LOT during my recovery) i am WAY healthier than i ever was at my smallest weight. I think that is important to remember.
Best of luck.0 -
I think you should get your body fat checked by a professional to see where you really are.
This.0 -
Just because you are thin does not mean you are "healthy". Good for you for trying to get healthy. Try your hardest to ignore those people.
I lost a good amount and now everyone is telling me I am too thin, so in a way I understand.0 -
I think you should get your body fat checked by a professional to see where you really are.
^THIS
You don't know your actual BF%, so you're just making guesses to your own health. You might already be close to 17% BF. If you go much lower, you'll be starting to risk your health. The lowest a woman can go is 12%, and that's pushing it. The only people who reach that are elite athletes. You need to work out/train HARD to be able to achieve that. It requires a decent amount of muscle (but not bulk - toned). To strive for that, without doing heavy workouts, isn't a very realistic goal.
Under 30% BF is healthy for a woman. Under 25% is very healthy. If you're not active, any lower isn't a wise choice.0 -
You sound perfect just the way you are now - But if you feel that you need to make a few more changes and are doing it the healthy way then screw them and do what makes you happy. Sounds to me that you are making positive changes and consuming more healthy foods - how can that be bad?0
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What I had to start telling people is that since no one felt compelled to say...
"Oh my God! How fat are you trying to get? You don't need to gain anymore weight. I'm getting concerned about your health."
They do not now get to say...
"Oh my God! How skinny are you trying to get? You don't need to lose any more weight. I'm getting concerned about your health."
Keep doing what you're doing.0 -
Some people don't realise that having a relationship with your body is something that you build after years of struggling and succeeding in your own skin. They cannot just walk in and tell you that they know your shell better you do, little crab.
They don't have a relationship with their body. You do. And You can own that relationship with pride.
Go forth and amaze thyself.0 -
Thanks for the comments everyone. I just wanted to address a couple things- I logged religiously from Jan-June and I pretty much eat the same things over and over, so although I do not log, I have a pretty good idea of the calorie content of everything I eat. If anything, I think I am eating less than what I'm actually consuming, so this is not a question of me starving myself.
I do some strength training but not much, just what I can do in 15-20 min with my limited equipment (my job and baby take up most of my time). Mostly I do body weight exercises- lunges, squats, pull ups, push ups, etc. I do some deadlifting, bench pressing, but not as often as I should. I do almost no cardio except for the occasional bike ride which is more recreational than anything.
I do not think my coworkers and family are jealous, I think it is honest concern. They act like I am one step away from anorexia. This is frustrating to me because whether or not I am thin enough- what is the harm if I don't want to eat bagels and donuts for breakfast anymore? Why is it bad that I am consciously trying to get a certain amount of vegetables and protein per day? I also think some of the 'you're too skinny' comments come from people who think they are complimenting me, but I don't take it as a compliment because I know it is not true. (and it wouldn't be a compliment even if it were true).
The 6 pounds I want to lose is not set in stone. That is just based on some body fat calculator that says I would need to be 107 if I wanted to be 17%. The 17% is not set in stone either- it's just where I think I would like to be. My main concern is being healthier and stronger and I wasn't getting results eating nothing but cereal and bread and smart ones frozen meals.0 -
oh my cry me a river but look your on the lower side of a healthy weight for ur height any lower and u will be under so ya eating a piece of cake aint gonna hurt you i dont thnk these ppl r being mean or rude or are jealous of what youve done and i mean if your own husband is making comments about it then maybe you do need to move your thoughts away from loosing weight and lift sum weights or something and no im no where remotly close to being jealous and thats why im saying this i have no desire to be "skinny" im not envious of skinny girls or anything but there is a such thing as too skinny and im affraid your headed in that direction
Maybe she doesn't want a piece of cake... and regardless it is totally inappropriate of her BOSS to tell her she is wasting away and needs to eat cake. Um, hello harassment?0 -
YES! This is also happening to me! I am 5'4 and about 115lb got tested for 19% body fat a few weeks ago, I still have some fat in the middle and on my legs, I eat a healthy mostly plant based/vegan diet I still consume honey but thats it,I don't eat crappy processed foods, I watch my protein, iron etc. and make sure I get all my nutrients, I work my muscles 3-4x a week and get in cardio as well. I have been told "eat something", "it's called food, try it sometime" and "you looked fine before (at 130+)". It is really hard when people sometimes don't realize I do it to be healthy not just to lose weight, I want to be healthy on the inside, so when people think I can eat a cookie because I'm smaller, I say no because it's unhealthy and I don't want it that often. I also think people that are unhealthy get defensive and don't understand, and I try to stay calm and tell myself that they are mentally not where I am, and until they are they won't get it. Hope this helps you feel like you are not alone, message me anytime. I am also just set to maintain my weight and if my body loses it, it's because my body wants to, not because I'm depriving it, I eat until I'm full at least 3x a day and snack, I just think the kinds of food your eating is important, and my body will find it's ideal weight as long as I'm doing the right things. Don't give up, stay healthy if you want and don't worry about what they say, as long as you are being healthy about it your just fine!0
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I'm not going through it but I would like to voice my opinion, I love a skinny woman, but most of all I love a woman who is confident in themselves and cares about their well-being and not what people think of them!!! (yes there is an extent to some of it). I also feel that someone can be "too skinny" because it is not healthy and if all I can see is your bones, then that is not attractive. I just hate how modeling agency's and celebrities put such an emphasis on being skinny that there is no such this as too skinny anymore. A woman should love themselves and their body for who they are and yes being overweight is not attractive to many but if your trying to do something about it then I give you all the credit in the world and I respect you more than someone who just complains about them being fat or skinny and doing nothing about it.
Enjoy your day everyone!!1 :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :drinker: 0 -
I find this thread fascinating. It really shows the powers of personal bias, perception and context.
First, to get it out of the way, the coworkers and anyone one else crossing boundaries are rude and their behavior is inexcusable.
But is it reasonable to assume that every naysayer has nefarious intentions?
We can minimize her husband by trivializing his concerns as "all about boobs", but do you really think that's his motivation? Really?
Yes, there are jealous and catty people in the world, there are also people that are concerned when they see a very thin person only nibble on a carrot stick.
I think that the better advice would be to tell her to have her weight and bodyfat checked officially and get an understanding if she is truly in the range of good health.0 -
I get it too! When people find out that im trying to loose weight theyre always like but your not fat! you need to get more meat on your bones and other things like that. But im just trying to get back to fitting into the jeans I bought a few months ago. Just some people don't understand. Do what makes you happy!0
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Amen sister! I am going through the same thing...I am around 118 and am 5'2. I have around 21% body fat as well which isn't bad I know, BUT I still have some fat I would like to lose. I want to eat healthier and tone my body but everyone is giving me hell about it >:( I feel that with my height I could still lose a good few pounds and still be very healthy which is what I'm trying to do! Keep up the good work and don't listen to others..you're not starving yourself...you're eating zucchini! I think youre doing great 0
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I am also very thin at 120 right now. I just want to drop one more pound. At your weight you should be more worried about toning. You gotta stay healthy. At lower weights I was becoming anemic. I'm happy between 115-120.0
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oh my cry me a river
^perfect example of original post lmao0 -
Instead of "guessing" your body fat, get tested. You could be way off on your estimate.
113 lbs at 5'3" is pretty thin according to "average" standards. It's about a BMI of 20, which is getting toward the lower side of healthy. I'm not saying your coworkers, friends, family, etc. are right in saying those things to you, because they're not. It's rude. I've endured those comments myself, and it's just mean. I hate it. However, I do wonder if losing more pounds is really what you want to be shooting for, since you're already at a good weight. Perhaps it's time to focus on building muscle to burn fat. You don't have to get bulky, but focusing on strength training will burn the fat away so you can lose that jiggle.
^^^ This. I realize it is rude to say things like that, but at least they care enough to state they are concerned. There are many people that don't have anyone that cares.0 -
But is it reasonable to assume that every naysayer has nefarious intentions?
We can minimize her husband by trivializing his concerns as "all about boobs", but do you really think that's his motivation? Really?
Yes. I can tell you that is 100% his main problem. Trust me.0 -
Ooooh I hate this so much >_<. I'm getting told constantly by my dad that if I reach my goal I will be too skinny. It doesn't seem to matter how much I demonstrate that I have a fair amount of muscle under the fat. Nor does he really seem fazed when I flick my belly and there's still a jiggle. The man seems content to be at what looks like 30%+ body fat. I am not.0
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"Thank you for offering me some of that cake, it looks delicious! But I am so full for breakfast/lunch/dinner, do you mind if I wrap it up and take it home?"
*throws it out on the way home or gives it to friend/boyfriend*0 -
Why should the OP discuss with her doctor? Where is this coming from??? Because you looked at one blurry pic, where she seems to be completely normal, and determined she has an eating disorder???
Can you imagine if every time an overweight person posted here, someone chimed in with the following:
"I just looked at your pics and you definitely look FAT. You should go see a doctor and have your body fat percentage checked asap. Perhaps you have an eating disorder?"
There is nothing wrong with being thin, even being at the low end of the normal BMI scale (or whatever you want to use)... It's healthy, and it's her choice. It's really nobody's business but hers. Everyone is just so overweight now that a perfectly normal person has to have her mental health questioned just for eating healthy! It's insane.
--P0 -
My husband started this process before me and is almost at his goal weight, actually a weight slightly above his suggested BMI because, trust me, he wasn't that when I met him and was scrawny. BMI doesn't account for everything. So, anyway, he is really close to his goal (I still have a way to go) and I think he looks pretty nice. His parents told him he looks sick! He's lost too much weight. Seriously? He looks healthy! He just had his physical- he's doing fine and I am really proud him. It kind of ticks me off that they aren't encouraging our healthy eating habits. Most everyone else says how much healthier he looks. Keep eating healthy and taking care of yourself. Those people just don't like to be reminded that they aren't.0
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I've had comments made to me from the beginning of trying to have a healthy life to the present.....
I am 5'3 and I started here at 135 weight. People made all kinds of comments when I passed over cake, or that I was exercising...saying I didn't need to do all that, I was already skinny...why would I be working out?!? A lady in Walmart made snide remarks just for buying a workout item saying "Your already skinny, that is just going to make you skinnier." Biiitch...sayyy what?!
I'm around 120 now and STILL have certain fitness goals, and ....people are still making comments/talking. (latest one was "eat this, you are just too skinny!"
The positive affects this lifestyle has made on me, as well as my son, and my family are ones I cannot and don't feel the need to HAVE to explain to anyone.
If there is one thing I've learned in this life...it's that people are going to talk. & This is me giving two sh!ts........0 -
oh my cry me a river but look your on the lower side of a healthy weight for ur height any lower and u will be under so ya eating a piece of cake aint gonna hurt you i dont thnk these ppl r being mean or rude or are jealous of what youve done and i mean if your own husband is making comments about it then maybe you do need to move your thoughts away from loosing weight and lift sum weights or something and no im no where remotly close to being jealous and thats why im saying this i have no desire to be "skinny" im not envious of skinny girls or anything but there is a such thing as too skinny and im affraid your headed in that direction
I got confused somewhere around where the third period should have been and stopped reading. The only thing I could tell is that it wasn't exactly supportive and comes across as very rude to someone who needs support. If you have constructive criticism for the OP, then maybe you should try to put it in an understandable, friendly format.
To the OP: I've been there. I've been skinny my whole life. I've been asked things from "Are you anorexic?" to "Are you on drugs?" right to my face. The fact of the matter is, I wasn't healthy. I did eat, but I didn't eat right. I'm actually still working on eating right, but it gets better each day. I also had no muscular strength at all, so now I lift weights. It's taking time, and initially I lost some weight, but I'm seeing some contours and increased stamina come along. I feel better than I ever have. Now, I do still often hear things like "Why are you watching what you eat?" (it's so I can make sure I'm eating right) and "Why do you work out, you're already tiny?" (Because tiny does not mean healthy, and not exercising is not healthy). The comments are changing now though, there are people noticing the developing muscles who compliment the work.
Basically, as you seem to already know, skinny does not mean healthy. You need to find out what your actual body fay percentage is, eat a healthy, balanced diet, and exercise. If you don't want to lose more weight, I suggest some cardio for general health, and weight lifting to build muscle mass. I know how much it sucks for people to make comments like the ones you deal with, but we're the only ones who can take control and get healthy. It's going to take a lot of determination and work, but you'll grow to love your body and feel stronger than you ever thought possible.0 -
It's very much a cultural thing. When I gained to 120lbs at 5'4", my asian family/friends never called me "thin" or too thin - my parents actually told me to lose a few haha (my face was getting puffy).
At 110lbs, no one said a thing either. The only time I've ever gotten comments is ironically, from strangers whose opinions I disregard.
Weight is not a measure of health. Show your family your blood tests and health records if they're really that curious.0 -
OP: it could be a jealousy thing. Some folks hate seeing others succeed where they can't.
You may just have to get mean with them. Tell them, "I know what I'm doing, I don't need your advice. Don't bring it up again.".0 -
Instead of "guessing" your body fat, get tested. You could be way off on your estimate.
113 lbs at 5'3" is pretty thin according to "average" standards. It's about a BMI of 20, which is getting toward the lower side of healthy. I'm not saying your coworkers, friends, family, etc. are right in saying those things to you, because they're not. It's rude. I've endured those comments myself, and it's just mean. I hate it. However, I do wonder if losing more pounds is really what you want to be shooting for, since you're already at a good weight. Perhaps it's time to focus on building muscle to burn fat. You don't have to get bulky, but focusing on strength training will burn the fat away so you can lose that jiggle.
What impy said. If folk are commenting, it MAY be because they are concerned. There is such a thing as TOO thin, though it doesn't initially sound like you are in that category. Get checked to be sure.0 -
I know exactly what you are going through, because I am on the same boat right now. I am 5'1.5" and weighs 101 lb with a BMI lower than 19. The truth is that even with my body fat at around 21%-22%, I still have somewhat visible love handle & muffin top and troubled inner thigh. Get a body fat scale that will also tells you muscle% (I have this one: http://www.amazon.com/Omron-HBF-514C-Composition-Sensing-Monitor/dp/B0020MMCDE/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1343658230&sr=8-5&keywords=body+fat+scale)
At this point, you need to monitor your body fat% and muscle% to make sure that you are actually on the right track, get rid of the body fat, not the muscle. And what you should be focus on is not weight loss, you should be doing some muscle building. Simply burning fat away is not going to give you the great abs & shape, you need to combine cardio and strength training to get the slim and tone body. Good luck!!0 -
I hate this, and get it all the time.
I'm healthy. My body fat % is in a healthy range. I enjoy working out and eating well.
But yet when people say this to me, I feel the need to prove something for some reason and show them that I DO eat.
OP, I also think it could be a jealousy-thing. If you've got it, flaunt it
It's better they be rude by calling you too skinny than to call you chubby!!0
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