People are way to easily offended because...
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I'm not offended or anything, but "Janitor" and "Garbage Man" are two different jobs - one cleans and maintains a space while the other collects trash from the curb. You really shouldn't call a garbage man a janitor, because he/she isn't one. Janitor is not a politically correct term for Garbage Man - it's just a different thing altogether. "Sanitation Engineer" is the PC for Garbage Man, but not for Janitor. I don't even know if there is a PC term for a Janitor. But I get your point. Hope I didn't offend anyone...
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I chalk it up to the internet effect. Anyone can become critical of someone else and hide behind the comfort of a screen name.0
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So funny :laugh:0
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*****es need to not be coddled so much as brats...or kids, if you prefer that name for them.0
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Adults abusing children has been happening since the begging of human civilization. Why the knee jerk reaction now?Hmmm. Aside from the other petty annoyances, I can safely say that the rule governing adults touching children is not due to people being offended, but by children being abused by adults. It's sad, but a few rotten apples caused the rules to be implemented.
And, ethical adults in positions of authority understand this and follow the rules.
I'm an ethical adult in positions of authority...If a crying kid came to me with their arms outstretched knowing I could break their little heart even if I hated the little bugger I'm likely to give them a hug. I was trying to study when the university lunch thing happened, I did hate that kid haha. The only thought that would stop me would be the crazy people who would sue me for it. Not because I think it's a wrong and think it's an ethical rule. I'd hug a kid if they were crying and had their arms outstretched to me even if I'm not a fan of the kid.
There's a group of unparented kids who no longer get affection now. How is that going to mess them up as an adult? Not to mention all the angry and sad kids, some who will eventually get defensive because they don't understand why nobody wants to have anything to do with them. I don't care if half the school board was abused as children. I've had my share of bad experiences...That doesn't give me or them the right to take away affection from children.
Just wait till one day someone shoots up a school because they don't understand why half of society shunned them as children lol. Maybe going a little to far here but you get the point (hopefully).0 -
Our society's over-hyped reaction to this type of interaction should cause any adult male to be extremely cautious around children.
This is one area that 'innocent until proven guilty' has been thrown out the window. Lives have been ruined by false assumptions and false accusations all in the name of 'if it saves just one child its worth it'. YES it is definitely worth protecting the children, but we've gone so far overboard that the slightest hint of an accusation has the villagers with torches ready to hang someone before the facts can be determined. Its a scary time to be an adult male that has any underage females in their life.
To be clear, I'm not a creep, perv, weirdo, pedophile, or anything like that. But I am observant and I learn. I've seen the stories of what happens to guys when confronted by a child-safety nazi. The type of people who are addicted to the sexual predators lists on the internet. The type who point fingers first and ask questions later. The type that live their entire lives in fear that someone is out to get them or their children. I feel so sorry for them because I know its as a result of some horrific trauma they probably suffered as a child themselves due to some perv relative. That's how terrible these crimes are, that even though the abuse may have only been once or a a few times it lasts FOREVER and affects all those around the abused person as well. I learn to avoid situations that could support any type of false claim. I refuse to babysit my grandchildren unless my wife is present. Heck, I don't even want to be alone in the same room with children for fear that someone will misinterpret something. Always best to have groups of three for protection of all parties involved, whether its a teacher, camp counselor, youth group leader or whatever.
I hate the world has become like this. I love my children and grandchildren. I hate being associated as part of a group of society that is automatically thought of by others as 'creepy old guys' simply because we committed the crimes of being male and getting older.0 -
I've worked at camps for special needs( and yes I say that.. and get offended when someone uses the word retarded) and we were expected to bathe these campers(both male and female) if they couldn't do it themselves. So their solution was to have a giant room with a bunch of shower heads in it and thats how we did things. Out in the open so that nothing bad could happen.. even though everyone who worked at the camp, had a background check and was deemed cleared.
The other camp I worked at for special needs, did have shower curtains and valued privacy more then anything else. Plus there was always more then one person in the bathroom helping, so something would have seemed off if we were in there for more time then we should have been.
I don't think it has to do with people being easily offended but more that they have had the fear put in them due to all the news stories of rape, molestation, kidnapping, etc. People are down right terrified now to go out of their houses for fear that something will happen.. and it's kind of silly if you ask me, but to each their own.0 -
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I'm an ethical adult in positions of authority...If a crying kid came to me with their arms outstretched knowing I could break their little heart even if I hated the little bugger I'm likely to give them a hug. I was trying to study when the university lunch thing happened, I did hate that kid haha. The only thought that would stop me would be the crazy people who would sue me for it. Not because I think it's a wrong and think it's an ethical rule. I'd hug a kid if they were crying and had their arms outstretched to me even if I'm not a fan of the kid.
There's a group of unparented kids who no longer get affection now. How is that going to mess them up as an adult? Not to mention all the angry and sad kids, some who will eventually get defensive because they don't understand why nobody wants to have anything to do with them. I don't care if half the school board was abused as children. I've had my share of bad experiences...That doesn't give me or them the right to take away affection from children.
Just wait till one day someone shoots up a school because they don't understand why half of society shunned them as children lol. Maybe going a little to far here but you get the point (hopefully).
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^^ Yes this!!
I worked at a low low low income Title I school this past year. Some of these kids only get negative attention from their parents (or alot of times caregiver or foster parent). They need to understand that we are there, we love them no matter what, and I tell ya, most of all, some of them just need a hug every day.
I can't tell you how many times I would be standing in the hallway doing morning duty and would get dozens of child initiated hugs as they headed to breakfast.
The things I have see would break you heart. But it's priceless to see them come in all sad, see you waiting, smile and run and give you a hug. It's a bright spot in their day.
I was the Perm Sub for the building so I got to know pretty much every single class. So, no matter where I was in the buidling, I was being watched by children who needed a positive role model who they could talk to and trust. (it's a primary school).
It's just very unfortunate that we live in a society where these things have happened to children to cause such rules to be in effect.
FWIW in the city's orientation, they do a big thing on the "no touching" rule.
But, at the school where I was, they Principal and A.P. would also hug the kids.
They just need it, noone else loves them, they need to be shown it at least the 5 days a week while in our care.0 -
While I agree to a certain extent, I do still think that people are WAY too rude, and that the blame is often shifted onto the victim for being upset and/or offended.
I don't believe in being PC, but I believe in being polite. We need a healthy balance, I believe.
As for teachers not being able to hug kids, well, I believe that is plain sad. It feels like kids these days can't do anything. Especially with all of these 'elf and safety rules. I do, however, understand why these rules have been implemented, but on the flipside, I do think that the rejection can be painful. I was bullied really badly in all but one of the four primary schools I went to, and teachers felt like my only security. If one of them ever refused me a hug, it would have broken my heart. *shrug* I'm a sensitive person.0 -
Adults abusing children has been happening since the begging of human civilization. Why the knee jerk reaction now?Hmmm. Aside from the other petty annoyances, I can safely say that the rule governing adults touching children is not due to people being offended, but by children being abused by adults. It's sad, but a few rotten apples caused the rules to be implemented.
And, ethical adults in positions of authority understand this and follow the rules.
I'm an ethical adult in positions of authority...If a crying kid came to me with their arms outstretched knowing I could break their little heart even if I hated the little bugger I'm likely to give them a hug. I was trying to study when the university lunch thing happened, I did hate that kid haha. The only thought that would stop me would be the crazy people who would sue me for it. Not because I think it's a wrong and think it's an ethical rule. I'd hug a kid if they were crying and had their arms outstretched to me even if I'm not a fan of the kid.
There's a group of unparented kids who no longer get affection now. How is that going to mess them up as an adult? Not to mention all the angry and sad kids, some who will eventually get defensive because they don't understand why nobody wants to have anything to do with them. I don't care if half the school board was abused as children. I've had my share of bad experiences...That doesn't give me or them the right to take away affection from children.
Just wait till one day someone shoots up a school because they don't understand why half of society shunned them as children lol. Maybe going a little to far here but you get the point (hopefully).
This. My love, this.0 -
Hmmm. Aside from the other petty annoyances, I can safely say that the rule governing adults touching children is not due to people being offended, but by children being abused by adults. It's sad, but a few rotten apples caused the rules to be implemented.
And, ethical adults in positions of authority understand this and follow the rules.
And break little kids hearts because of it. What about the kids who have no human interaction at home? It's creating emotional problems too. Are we to ignore that? kids and adults included, are we suppose to grow everyone up to not touch other people at all? As a kid who was shunned and beat up by other kids to the point of permanent physical scars I can only imagine how some kid crawling into someones lap because they like them feels as they get shunned away. I'm the least touchy person ever and I hate it when someone touches me unnecessarily, but doesn't that just make the problem worse? Do you think one of those pervy teachers or two could be a uncle and around kids in other situations. The chances of a teacher creeping a kid in the middle of class is fairly slim don't you think. What I'm talking about took place in a university lunch room surrounded by several groups of kids and adults.
That no contact thing...I just don't see it being helpful? Creeps find ways, who says they'll listen? What about a hugs but only arms or good job buddy tusseled hair jobs that last less then so many seconds haha. I just don't like the idea of pushing chidren away...The thought is even creepier that the only ones seeking out to touch the kids when they're sad is the creepers.
Also this.
I just couldn't do it. Never could I turn my back on someone who is crying and in need, especially not a child.0 -
I'm not offended or anything, but "Janitor" and "Garbage Man" are two different jobs - one cleans and maintains a space while the other collects trash from the curb. You really shouldn't call a garbage man a janitor, because he/she isn't one. Janitor is not a politically correct term for Garbage Man - it's just a different thing altogether. "Sanitation Engineer" is the PC for Garbage Man, but not for Janitor. I don't even know if there is a PC term for a Janitor. But I get your point. Hope I didn't offend anyone...
I'm offended you'd think I'm offended :POur society's over-hyped reaction to this type of interaction should cause any adult male to be extremely cautious around children.
This is one area that 'innocent until proven guilty' has been thrown out the window. Lives have been ruined by false assumptions and false accusations all in the name of 'if it saves just one child its worth it'. YES it is definitely worth protecting the children, but we've gone so far overboard that the slightest hint of an accusation has the villagers with torches ready to hang someone before the facts can be determined. Its a scary time to be an adult male that has any underage females in their life.
To be clear, I'm not a creep, perv, weirdo, pedophile, or anything like that. But I am observant and I learn. I've seen the stories of what happens to guys when confronted by a child-safety nazi. The type of people who are addicted to the sexual predators lists on the internet. The type who point fingers first and ask questions later. The type that live their entire lives in fear that someone is out to get them or their children. I feel so sorry for them because I know its as a result of some horrific trauma they probably suffered as a child themselves due to some perv relative. That's how terrible these crimes are, that even though the abuse may have only been once or a a few times it lasts FOREVER and affects all those around the abused person as well. I learn to avoid situations that could support any type of false claim. I refuse to babysit my grandchildren unless my wife is present. Heck, I don't even want to be alone in the same room with children for fear that someone will misinterpret something. Always best to have groups of three for protection of all parties involved, whether its a teacher, camp counselor, youth group leader or whatever.
I hate the world has become like this. I love my children and grandchildren. I hate being associated as part of a group of society that is automatically thought of by others as 'creepy old guys' simply because we committed the crimes of being male and getting older.
The bold part.
My dad lives with my sister, her husband, and daughter. She's a odd little creature like me and if she's wearing anything dress like she always tries to take off her underwear haha (apparently I use to do this too, I keep telling sis to watch out she'll turn out like me haha). This has been her habit lately, even in public. Dad was with her one day and insisted she keep them on since they were going out in public haha but she refused. Dad said you keep them on when people are around. She said at night I take them off? He said whatever you want if you leave them on now haha. She agreed and off they went for the day.
Well later that night she was trying to take them off in front of my sister. Sis insisted she leave them on. Then she said "but pop said I don't have to wear underwear". Dear lord she thought lol. What? What did he do? "dad said I don't wear underwear at night". She promptly asked dad and he explained....completely... embarrassed...and horrified. Sis thought it was historical. If that got out to the wrong person, God knows what could happen.
[/quote]I'm an ethical adult in positions of authority...If a crying kid came to me with their arms outstretched knowing I could break their little heart even if I hated the little bugger I'm likely to give them a hug. I was trying to study when the university lunch thing happened, I did hate that kid haha. The only thought that would stop me would be the crazy people who would sue me for it. Not because I think it's a wrong and think it's an ethical rule. I'd hug a kid if they were crying and had their arms outstretched to me even if I'm not a fan of the kid.
There's a group of unparented kids who no longer get affection now. How is that going to mess them up as an adult? Not to mention all the angry and sad kids, some who will eventually get defensive because they don't understand why nobody wants to have anything to do with them. I don't care if half the school board was abused as children. I've had my share of bad experiences...That doesn't give me or them the right to take away affection from children.
Just wait till one day someone shoots up a school because they don't understand why half of society shunned them as children lol. Maybe going a little to far here but you get the point (hopefully).
^^ Yes this!!
I worked at a low low low income Title I school this past year. Some of these kids only get negative attention from their parents (or alot of times caregiver or foster parent). They need to understand that we are there, we love them no matter what, and I tell ya, most of all, some of them just need a hug every day.
I can't tell you how many times I would be standing in the hallway doing morning duty and would get dozens of child initiated hugs as they headed to breakfast.
The things I have see would break you heart. But it's priceless to see them come in all sad, see you waiting, smile and run and give you a hug. It's a bright spot in their day.
I was the Perm Sub for the building so I got to know pretty much every single class. So, no matter where I was in the buidling, I was being watched by children who needed a positive role model who they could talk to and trust. (it's a primary school).
It's just very unfortunate that we live in a society where these things have happened to children to cause such rules to be in effect.
FWIW in the city's orientation, they do a big thing on the "no touching" rule.
But, at the school where I was, they Principal and A.P. would also hug the kids.
They just need it, noone else loves them, they need to be shown it at least the 5 days a week while in our care.
^This this this. I have some friends in their late 20s that grew up under the care of 'the system'. You have no idea how much this makes a difference in a child's life...to the point they even talk about the adults who affected them as adults...and started to volunteer their time to help people who are part of the system...in a invisible manner by reading social workers reports to make sure they've done everything in their power to help because they're actually not aloud to meet talk to or comfort the kids as an responsible adult they can relate to.0 -
YOu know what else kids needs.....they need you to tell them you love them and truly mean it.
We had a "tough little nut" who was a 2nd graders. In some kids you can just see the writing on the wall of where they life will be headed even at such a young age.
He never smile and was completely angry at the world. I mean, can you blame him, noone wanted him.....not even family. And the family he ended up with, well, they really ddin't want him either.
I made it a point that whenever I saw him, I would say good morning and smile at him. After a couple of month, he smiled back and did the same.
Whenever I needed to be in his class for the day to sub.....I made sure to hold his hand in the hall and shake it back and forth all silly like. Inside he liked it because he would look over at me and just smile while we were doing it.
It about broke my heart one day when he told me noone had ever held his hand (while shaking it silly) while they were wakling with him. :frown:
I totally understand why the laws are in place but children need this, they really do. When noone else will do it (love a child) a teacher needs to step up and do it.
That's why we are underpaid.0 -
YOu know what else kids needs.....they need you to tell them you love them and truly mean it.
We had a "tough little nut" who was a 2nd graders. In some kids you can just see the writing on the wall of where they life will be headed even at such a young age.
He never smile and was completely angry at the world. I mean, can you blame him, noone wanted him.....not even family. And the family he ended up with, well, they really ddin't want him either.
I made it a point that whenever I saw him, I would say good morning and smile at him. After a couple of month, he smiled back and did the same.
Whenever I needed to be in his class for the day to sub.....I made sure to hold his hand in the hall and shake it back and forth all silly like. Inside he liked it because he would look over at me and just smile while we were doing it.
It about broke my heart one day when he told me noone had ever held his hand (while shaking it silly) while they were wakling with him. :frown:
I totally understand why the laws are in place but children need this, they really do. When noone else will do it (love a child) a teacher needs to step up and do it.
That's why we are underpaid.
I think this is a big reason allot of people get into it in the first place. Especially after seeing so many bad teachers lol. I have a teacher friend who's constantly filling her house with crap just so strangers have something to play with. As important as it is she didn't go through that education to souly educate, she wants to help make them happy. And it's turning into such a hard thing to do these days with all these rules. Rules that were put into place for a good reason but are bad rules.0 -
The thing is, in our area as they are building new schools, they literally have cameras everywhere. Including the classrooms.
Shocking but, some teachers didn't like the camera in their room.
Me, I could care less!!!! It protects me and the kids, to me it's a win win situation.
As it is every area of the outside all the halls are monitored with cameras now.0 -
I'm working at a kids camp right now and there's pretty strict rules about physical contact like you said. Kids can't sit on their leaders laps. It's hard when these kids practically crawl on your lap as soon as you sit down, and you have to be like "no, sit next to me." And we always have to have groups of 3 go to the bathroom, so even if only one kid needs to go and the leader isn't actually going in the bathroom but waiting outside, we have to make another kid come along. A little extreme, but it not only protects the children, it protects the leaders as well from false accusation.
I am the Children's Director for my church and we have to have strict rules like this too. Two adults in every class room and nursery (which is hard to find sometimes!) even if there are just 2 kids or the door stays open. Can not be alone in bathroom with a child, if possible. Girls can not sit on male laps, boys not on women's. Background checks preformed before you can work with the kids and then every two years after that. Hugs are okay but be careful for how long if you are the opposite sex. When correcting behavior, always have an adult witness. But these rules have to be in place to not only protect the kids but to protect the adults from false accusations.0 -
I have to agree with you. Our society is ridiculous. People are SO WORRIED these days about everything. Its a wonder all of our heads don't explode from it all. We are also far too worried about being "politically correct" like you said. No one ever wants to step on toes.0
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Adults abusing children has been happening since the begging of human civilization. Why the knee jerk reaction now?Hmmm. Aside from the other petty annoyances, I can safely say that the rule governing adults touching children is not due to people being offended, but by children being abused by adults. It's sad, but a few rotten apples caused the rules to be implemented.
And, ethical adults in positions of authority understand this and follow the rules.
So you are trying to say this was acceptable at some point? ::shakes head::::0 -
I've never been offended in my life.0
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Great Post CoderGirl! Preach on!!! My wife is an ESOL teacher (she teaches kids who don't know english) and my sister works in a daycare for children who were abused (mentally, physically and sexually). Both of them hug their children. I am going to be non-pc here and say something stereotypical
but my wife's kids and parents that come from a hispanic background are typically a very physical bunch (hugs and kisses). It is just their culture. They hug my wife from all angles before she even knows they are coming. And my sister gives all the hugs she can to the abused children to help build trust and aid in their healing. Now isn't it silly that the unabused kids don't get hugs for fear of abuse, but the abused kids get them to make them feel better. Things that make you go hmmmm? 0 -
So you think we create rapists? Because there are laws that protect children AND teachers? That's nutty.0
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And yes, I read that before you edited it.0
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Being 'politically correct' is another reason people become easily offended.
Our local news posted a picture of the old Batmobile that was in town for a car show. People freaked out on facebook and requested they take it down because of the CO shootings. Really? A picture of the batmobile at a car show!?0 -
I've never been offended in my life.
ARF!0 -
This thread is boring...0
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I'm with you another thread has someone comlaining that some one called her fat. And she is fat!!!!There's something wrong with the world today...People are way to offended
I think there are far to many people who are offended by nothing these days. I'm not talking about people who are obviously mean and rude to others. I think that's reasonable though some of it can be in humor. I'm talking about things like this:
A friend of mine was working with kids that were visiting our university and one of them was upset and crying. He's a real kid person and he stood up, stepped back from the crying kid who had his held out his hand in hug position and said it's OK and to go sit down. The kid look heart broken. So did my friend. I thought it was kind of odd and awkward of him to do that so I had to ask him why. Apparently, they're instructed to do so and cannot come in contact with any of the kids and if they do they can be sued...they are not allowed to hug them or pat their back or have any kind of physical contact except for 'high fives'. If the kid runs jumps at or goes to hug them they have to move away immediately. I'm sorry, but if you think there's something wrong with touching little kids, you're a pervert. And its reasons like this that there are so many people who are so easily offended these days...When someone does something that isn't wrong.
Also there was a law here that was trying to get passed for clothes lines to be banned, they've been here forever but suddenly it's like there was something wrong with letting people see laundry. I'm sorry, but if you're offended by laundry, you're a pervert. Also, who cares about the environment? It's definitely more important for us not to see anything...
Ever year we're trying to come up with some offensive word for things. Don't call them a garbage man, call them janitor, don't call them a janitor call them a sanitation engineer...Don't call them retarded call them special needs...don't call them special needs call them intellectually disabled...Don't call Don't call them obese call them this, don't call them over weight call them large, don't call them large call them heavy, don't call them that!...every year we have to come up with a word to fool confuse ourselves by because we're easily offended. Yes, there's some things that make sense, like people are not 'fat' they do not morph into a substance only when they gain weight. There's other things that are ridiculous though.
This week I've seen posts that involved:
being offended because people wear lulu lemon/spandex in public when not exercising - You try losing a bunch of weight and suddenly owning a wardrobe that isn't spandex, or having big hips etc. Some people like to be comfortable
being offended because people post pics of their rack - Why are you so concerned with this womens rack?
being offended because people post pics of their stomach - What gives you to judge what's ok and what's not ok? I'd much rather show my stomach then my face, it looks much nicer lol
bineg ofefnded baceuse poeple psot thnigs taht arent spealed cerroctly - Really, you can still communicate
being offended because people post pics with little clothes - perve
being offended because people are smaller then them - no, you don't lose self worth as your self gets smaller
being offended because people eat more then them - no it doesn't mean that they're weaker or lying or not losing weight because they eat more????!?!!?!
I just changed my picture to something that someone finds offensive because I don't think it is or should be. I think you should do the same.
I think it's about time we all stopped growing up and started acting sensible like little kids.0 -
bineg ofefnded baceuse poeple psot thnigs taht arent spealed cerroctly -
*convulses*0 -
Political correctness - the idea that a turd can be picked up by the clean end.0
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because their parents did not teach them how to take a joke.0
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I love a good rant, I have strong opinions and I don't like hippy-dippy fence sitters but it's like you're not allowed to have your own view unless it's palatable and said in some faux-inspirational Oprah way. There are a lot of lazy people with a lot of excuses and if you try and point it out they go crying to Mammy. Man up. You don't like cursing, don't curse! Me, I love a nice cup of tea and a good strong curse!0
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