Do you cook differently for your family?

mesicali_chica

Nope... I learned early that if I cook to thier taste, I wont win in the loosing game. I make recipes that fit my meal plan and thier tastes. I use low fat and low calorie ingredients to make their favorite dishes like lasanga, meatloaf and banana bread find comparable recipes that are good for me and them. I use Skinnytaste.com often to find low cal meals and plan ahead to use good ingredients. Of course if I dont have self control a 62 calorie slice of banana bread easily becomes 62x5 and then nobody wins.

Amryfal

we have a limited number of things that my fiancé and his kids, and me and my kids, will all eat. we eat a lot of those things. heh. i miss my larger range of cooking skills, but i give them rein at times they won't cause household stress.

i am an adventurous cook and i love everything, and my kids were raised like that - they don't have to like everything, but if its dinner, they have to try it, and if they hate it (a very small number of things) they don't have to eat it, and they can fill up on side dishes. some things i adjust for myself, and sometimes i'll make myself something different/lighter, or the fiancé will fend for himself if i'm making something my kids and i love that he and his don't.

with the fiancé's kids, it's easier just to let them eat PB&J than to deal with the battle. at first i tried to say everyone would eat what i make because that's what i made, too bad, but that attitude was causing a *lot* of stress and more battles than i needed. we try to be flexible. i'll admit to a certain amount of rage over children that refuse to eat what i cook and get a sandwich instead, but if i'm not making the sandwich, what does it really matter? i'd love for them to eat healthy, but i can't force their father and i can't force his children. *sigh*

i refuse to do two different dinners, but i'll sometimes adjust certain portions to remove a spice or flavor if someone requests that. if they want something like spaghetti (popular with everyone but me) i use 93% lean ground beef or ground turkey, and i eat a lot less of it. i let the kids have their lunches that i refuse to eat - hot dogs, bologna, PB&J, snacky foods - and try to choose the best of available evils, lol. but they also eat a ton of fruit and just the occasional cheetos. i fend for myself at lunch.

the caveat to all of this is that i'm not 100% a clean eater. i'll eat treats and junk occasionally if it fits in my calories, so i'm not trying to get everyone to eat the tofu, whole wheat, and organic stuff for every meal.

DelilahCat0212

My kid has been eating whatever I've been eating since he started solid food (he's 14 now). He eats just about anything - I would even say he's even less picky than I am. I'm a single mom, I don't have the $$ for two separate meals so thank goodness I taught him early. We eat meat though so I'm thinking if you're going vegan and they are not that it would be very difficult.

LastSixtySix

Such an interesting post!

Some times I have to, but I'm increasingly NOT happy about it. Now I know why all the short-order cooks I've ever seen look grumpy and mean! Luckily, the Hubs eats fairly well now (except for the meat part and he's had to learn how to cook it himself). But when the grands come over at least once a week, mayhem sometimes beats down the door. I try to keep the stuff I've historically liked out of the kitchen but it is hard since the only way I can lose weight is to eat medium-low carbs. The kiddos need lots of carbs - ww grains, fruits, and the only veggies they really like are high glycemic. Except for today, at lunch. The 7-yr old #1 Grandson ate and LIKE spinach leaves for the first time!!! :drinker: :drinker: And the Granddaughter loves chia seeds. :drinker: :drinker: Small victories.

As for solutions, none for the everyday. :ohwell: But when school starts in two weeks, we'll no longer pick up the grands until after they've eaten dinner at their house! That doesn't help when the kids are in your house. . .sorry!

-Debra

AMYJK7110

I make things for my family that we all like and I just make small changes for mine.

EXAMPLES:
SPAGHETTI- we make the sauce and use ground turkey
Him: then he puts his on spaghetti noodles
Me: I put mine over top a shredded spaghetti squash!

CURRIED CHICKEN-
Him: He puts his inside a tortilla.
Me: I eat mine solo with veggies

TACOS- we use ground turkey
Him: He puts his in a tortilla
Me: I wrap mine in lettuce

STEAK AND POTATOES-
Him: He has his potato
Me: I mash up cauliflower instead (and put a little spray butter and light sour cream on it - tastes like mashed potatoes!)

YES! This is what happens for the most part in our house. EXCEPT if my boys request something specific, then I make them whatever they want. I don't think forcing your children to eat what YOU want to eat is fostering good eating habits. Maybe I have been fortunate that my children have always loved veggies and fruits, and don't eat huge portions, have always prefered water and milk over pop or other sweet drinks...I don't know. None of my boys are or have been even remotely overweight, and all 3 are very active in sports. They also can pick any kind of snacks at the grocery store they want. Want Oreos? Get a package! Pop Tarts? Go ahead! I say let them eat what they want, but teach them that just because it's there doesn't mean they should eat the whole package!
*just fyi my boys are 22 years old-5'9", 170lbs(swimmer) 15 years old-6'2", 197lbs(football, basketball and baseball) and 12 years old-5'2", 121lbs(football, basketball and baseball)

bicoastalgirl

my family eats what i cook. we all eat the same things for the most part (i have two young children - they get some modifications, but mostly eat what we eat). if i make pizza, i just eat a smaller portion. if we have stir fry, i measure out my rice. for me, i would have had trouble sticking with a diet if my family was eating tacos and i was eating rice cakes. it just would not have worked for me.

RuthSweetTooth

The way you are eating is giving you wayyy too little calcium. It will be disastrous for your skeleton if you do not include more dairy. There is no way your teenagers can eat as you do and they shouldn't! How will they get strong bones? I suggest you give up on the idea of becoming a vegan, it's just too extreme. Start feeding those boys real roast chicken, healthy pasta with light cheese sauce and veggies, and salads, and desserts with calcium like pudding and yummy fruits like baked apples, and you will all be better off.

EmmiDahling

Yes!! This is the hardest part of parenting for me! My kids are McDonalds, pizza, meat and potatoes addicts. I am a health nut, borderline vegetarian. They won't eat my food, so I end up taking them to the drive thru. I know that's bad parenting, but they will not eat my food, so I just gave up on them a long time ago. All three are active and healthy weights, so I don't worry too much. Maybe my habits will rub off on them when they are older. Maybe. For now it is just very inconvenient. Not to mention, no one is ever home at the same times to even think about having a family meal. I feel like I run a taxi station.

As for my husband, we hardly ever eat together. He works nights, and he is Korean, so spam and rice and kimchi are his staples. No thank you! He makes his own food, lol.

If we didn't like what my mother made, we didn't have to eat it, but we sure as heck weren't getting anything else for dinner. Her standard line was "you know how to make peanut butter and jelly.". Even if we were having a stubborn night and not eating what she made, we were not excused from being at the family dinner table either.

Gidzmo

Yes!! This is the hardest part of parenting for me! My kids are McDonalds, pizza, meat and potatoes addicts.

Our fussy eater is a grown man--meat, potatoes, corn, green beans, white bread (HAS to be white bread), and peanut butter. That's when he's not having a whole large meatlovers' pizza or McDonald's. And he does like Spam.

babycook

I cook. They eat what I make. They beg for junk because their friends get it but I just don't cave. My youngest is picky. She hates fish and rice. I don't make it alot but when I do she has to try it. That's the rule. She's not going to starve. She'll eat it when she's hungry enough.

IsleEsme

I have 3 kids (14, 12, 11) and a hubby and they eat what I cook or starve. Plain and simple. We've always done it this way and when I started eating better it became a family thing. My kids aren't deprived, we still have pizza night on Fridays and the occassional hot dog or some other such food but for the most part we eat well, lots of chicken breasts, fish, fruits and veggies and because we've always fed them this way they eat it.

amonroe1343

i try to cook what my family likes, but the healthiest way possible. my boyfriend is not a big guy, works outside hard all day, and has a motabolism most of us would be jealous of.
when i started cutting calories, he decided he would show his support by eating like me. in a week he lost 10 pounds and felt like crap..... SO we compromise. he eats a gross fast food mega calorie lunch, and i make the stuff he likes, and portion mine. it takes a lot.... and there are things he loves that we don't eat. mashed potatoes..... will be my downfall if they are in the house. but i do make raw fries baked with vinegar, and that suites him just fine.

I love mashed potatoes too and I could devour them in they are in close sight. I have made them before with half mashed cauliflower and half mashed potatoes and only make a small amount so that there is enough for whoever is eating that night. Then I don't get tempted with leftovers and I can still enjoy them. I did this for Thanksgiving and it was really good.

Owlie45

There is no good reason why they can eat right too.

lwagnitz

My situation is that I have two picky teens who don't like most of the foods I make for myself. They complain 'there's no food in the house' when they look in the refrigerator. They like a lot of kid-food--pizza, mac & cheese, fettuccini alfredo, fries, burritos, potato chips, taco chips and salsa, veggie versions of chik'n nuggets, cheese burgers, etc. So, I end up buying and/or making those things for them.

Usually, I resist, but in weak moments, I can get pulled into eating these rich foods, and see red in my food diary.

Please don't take this the wrong way because I'm truly not trying to be judgmental, just asking you to maybe reevaluate some things. You are here to lose weight and probably something which is more important: make yourself healthier? I would think about the way your kids eat. Do you really want them to be in your shoes? I know that I don't want my kids to ever feel they way I feel about myself, or have to have any concern about their health due to eating habits. They're in their teens now, and will likely be out of the house in a short time. If they are making bad choices like that already, imagine the choices they will make when they leave. If I were in your shoes, I'd put my foot down. You don't need to deprive them of everything, but they need to understand a balanced diet that they can carry on for when they live on their owns and make their OWN dinners.

I appreciate your take on this. Lately, my children are starting to cook for themselves, but mostly versions of the things I mentioned previously. They are night-owls, so much of this cooking is happening in the late evening--my toughest part of the day to resist temptation. Right now, they are proud of their creations and want me to try them. I do, to encourage them, but sometimes it's hard to stop at one bite. So, perhaps, this will be a transitional thing.

I'd love it if they could join me in eating whole food vegan--fruits, veggies, beans, whole grains, and nuts. They won't even touch nuts. Who doesn't like nuts?

May I suggest having days or even meals where you cook with them and they help in preparation of a meal. You can explain why you are making the choices of product you're using in the kitchen and at the same time make it a fun enjoyable experience as well as some bonding time in such a hectic world we live in

magerum

It's not uncommon for there to be 2 or 3 different dinners at our table at night. I don't know why people feel that have to eat the same thing as everyone else at the table. "It's too hard or inconvenient to make multiple meals." is the answer I know I'll get to this. Adapt or quit, those are your options, everything else is an excuse.

Just my opinion.
:drinker:

lwagnitz

It's not uncommon for there to be 2 or 3 different dinners at our table at night. I don't know why people feel that have to eat the same thing as everyone else at the table. "It's too hard or inconvenient to make multiple meals." is the answer I know I'll get to this. Adapt or quit, those are your options, everything else is an excuse.

Just my opinion.
:drinker:

Just to show a different side of the argument... I was raised as dinner being a time for family to get together. It was a form of structure growing up and a time to be one. We had dinner the same time every night, sat at the same spots at the table, and had a conversation about the day. However, at every meal my parents always had out tons of fresh veggies and fresh fruit and always a salad before the meal, so there were options there. And by I mean tons, is the fruit and vegetables on the table took up all the space, therefore we had more of a "buffet style" meal as we went up and got our own food and portions. I feel like this is a better option. I hope to raise my kids eating this way too. It taught me everything I needed to know about portion control and how to eat right, and what was a balanced diet. Maybe people should look into this option instead of making several different meals a night.

_VoV

The way you are eating is giving you wayyy too little calcium. It will be disastrous for your skeleton if you do not include more dairy. There is no way your teenagers can eat as you do and they shouldn't! How will they get strong bones? I suggest you give up on the idea of becoming a vegan, it's just too extreme. Start feeding those boys real roast chicken, healthy pasta with light cheese sauce and veggies, and salads, and desserts with calcium like pudding and yummy fruits like baked apples, and you will all be better off.

My kids have been vegetarian since birth. I doubt they could even digest roast chicken. I know that they have chosen to be vegetarians of their own accord at this point.

As for calcium--I supplement my own diet with a gentle powder supplement (the same one used in fortified orange juice; soy milk, etc). I more than meet the RDA for my age. My kids eat way more calcium than they need with all the dairy they eat. If they ceased to do that, I know how to supplement calcium, zinc, and vitamins D & B12. Those are mainly the nutrients that can be lacking in a vegetarian diet.

Superbritt2drescu

If you think you shouldn't have them, why is it justifiable for your family to put those foods in their mouths as well? I can't speak from experience because I don't have kids, but I do have a husband. He eats what I make, it's plain and simple. If he wants to eat bad, he can go and get the food to make it and make it himself because I refuse. It helps just not having those foods in the house, at all. I wouldn't make it totally obvious that it's healthy stuff. Of course, it is, but it shouldn't be looked at as bad, or something abnormal. I think the best way for your family to embrace the healthier meals by not saying making it clear you made it because it's healthy, but you made it because it's what's for dinner.

I believe in this. We are all picky eaters in my house but there is no reason we can't eat healthy. Why should my kids be eating crap I won't even eat?

ExplorinLauren

I do not make different meals... What I eat is healthy, good food... So I don't see why they need something bad for them (I have a husband and 4 kids) But, you can start by making healthier versions of the foods you already eat.
For instance, make your own pizza... (I slip in turkey pepperoni and no one seems to notice lol) and you can add tons of veggies and control how much cheese is on there. I still make steak, but we use sirloin instead of rib eye now.... and we add the salad ON the plate, to fill you up more with salad and just a small portion of steak. Grill potatoes in tin foil instead of mashed, Switch the type of butter you use, switch to light dressings...etc.
Good luck

predent

Nope. Only thing is that my boyfriend will get larger portion sizes!