I'm so FLIPPIN' tired of this!!!

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  • kdiamond
    kdiamond Posts: 3,329 Member
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    It's all about balance baby! I would reiterate so much of what has already been said, but why? Just know that you won't "ruin" everything by having another glass of wine or a baby Snickers...especially if you do Crossfit later in the day. You're just adding more fuel on which to fire. So do an extra set of something... Walk around the block... Run up and down the stairs a couple of times...

    Beating yourself up doesn't burn that many calories...not worth it.

    Exactly! And there is no such thing as a "perfect day" of eating anyhow...if you eat something you're not thrilled about, move on, and work harder at the gym!!
  • amersmanders
    amersmanders Posts: 118 Member
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    I have to agree that you're burning yourself out on this.

    Try to focus on things that are sustainable in the long run- things that if you were to stop doing now, you would be happy that you no longer did 5 years from now- or things that you started doing now, you would be glad that you started 5 years ago. Maybe it's a mindset rather than an actual physical thing. Maybe you focus on enjoying what you eat during meals because you know you're fueling your body, rather than eating for calorie content alone.

    Maybe on one of the days that you do go workout, you can go into it knowing that you will be eating or drinking back those calories as a treat to yourself. Just don't focus on your failures- they are good for seeing where you can improve, but they don't define you.
  • Lozze
    Lozze Posts: 1,917 Member
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    But the number 1 thing I always tell myself... do not allow it to make you feel bad or guilty. That can only lead to other negative things and is not healthy in the long run. NEVER LET FOOD MAKE YOU FEEL GUILTY

    I'm reposting this because it's really good advice. I feel guilty over no food I eat. I don't eat bad foods, good foods, nuutrious foods, unhealthy foods. I just eat food. I control it to help me reach my goals but if I go over eh no by deal. I'm a bit stricter the last couple of weeks because I wasn't happy with my weight loss but am still not assigning feelings to foods.
  • follmer20
    follmer20 Posts: 129 Member
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    I used to be like this. I'd be on a diet and think "oh, I can't eat this, can't drink that, I have to do this!" it worked but like you, I was tired of it by the 4th week or so and wanted to give up. Since I joined MFP, I read the forums every morning before my workout and I learn something new everyday. I've learned that I don't have to give up the foods I love. I don't have to only eat 1200 calories like everyone things. If I want something, I eat it. Just smaller portions. I'm an ice cream freak! And lately if I want some, I'll only take like a 1/2 cup or a couple bites out of the tub and I'm done, I gave up soda for about 4 months now and I just doesn't seem appealing to me anymore. But if I would want a soda, I'd drink it. Don't look at it as a war with food. Eat what you want, when you want, just in moderation. If you get past the 3rd and 4th weeks your body will just become used to it and you'll eventually not want to go to those comfort foods. Ik that's how I was. Good luck to you!
  • lornaloo3
    lornaloo3 Posts: 102
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    It's alright to have a day where you eat everything you burn. Not every day has to be in the negative column to be a success. My BMR is 1700 and then up a 1000 from there if I hit the gym like I'm supposed to hit it. If ate all of that back because of a party or event or just PMS I'm cool with it. Some days you tread water.
  • Athijade
    Athijade Posts: 3,248 Member
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    But the number 1 thing I always tell myself... do not allow it to make you feel bad or guilty. That can only lead to other negative things and is not healthy in the long run. NEVER LET FOOD MAKE YOU FEEL GUILTY

    I'm reposting this because it's really good advice. I feel guilty over no food I eat. I don't eat bad foods, good foods, nuutrious foods, unhealthy foods. I just eat food. I control it to help me reach my goals but if I go over eh no by deal. I'm a bit stricter the last couple of weeks because I wasn't happy with my weight loss but am still not assigning feelings to foods.

    Exactly. You are not going to die or stop losing weight because you had a slice of pizza with your friends. Heck, tomorrow I am going out to lunch with a friend and know my calorie intake will be like 1000 for that one meal. Oh well. No huge deal. I will eat well the rest of the day and go on with my life. It does me no good to sit and feel guilty because I want to have a dang burger and a beer! What kind of life are you living if you feel guilty about a random, not every day, meal? That is not the sort of life I want to live. I have enough stress in my life that I don't need to add that sort of guilt to it!
  • jlmoses91
    jlmoses91 Posts: 87 Member
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    You are being way to hard on yourself! This journey is not all or nothing. Its about moderation, being able to live your life, love the way you look and feel, and still be able to eat bad sometimes. Think of it as 80/ 20. 80% of the time eat well and the other 20% you can eat bad. You can have a snickers bite size candy without ruining your entire day! Just dont let it be everyday or an entire bag! If you are that hard about yourself you might actually go the other way and start binging. You have to remember that you can still eat the things you want just in little portions. By limiting yourself so much that you can't even have cheese, will most probably go to the other end of things. Be careful and be strong. Talk about how you are feeling and understand that a healthy way of living isnt cutting yourself off for weeks at a time, its about eating healthy and every once and a while eat something super yummy :) I hope this helps.
  • indrani1947
    indrani1947 Posts: 178 Member
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    Stop looking at it as a diet its a lifestyle change, so adapt your diet to 80 % healthy and 20 % indulgences. I eat chocolate almost daily and I drink - mainly wine and I do try to have 3 days a week without. But this will help you keep to your plan and you will not feel deprived. In 12 months I have lost lmost 40 lb and I am now trying to maintain. This time last year I was just hoping to lose 14-20 lb thinking that at my age I was fighting a losing battle and I'm now so proud of the new me ....
  • bcf7683
    bcf7683 Posts: 1,653 Member
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    I started my weight loss journey thinking like this... Then I started to educate myself. Mainly with everything that everyone else has already said. You need to maintain a lifestyle that won't burn you out. You still need to enjoy life.

    The day that I honestly sat myself down and thought "Okay, so if I keep eating 100% clean and not having ANYTHING off track, yeah, I'll reach my goals. But I'll also have missed tons of get-togethers with friends and family, missed summer cook outs, missed nights at the bar with people I love being with- all because I was terrified of the calories." So what if I have a night of beer or wine each weekend? I might be a pound heavier than I could've been, but I had fun. I enjoyed life. I'm still losing weight, but I'm okay with the fact that it's only 1 lb. a week instead of 1.5. I'm enjoying life in my new body that I worked hard for.

    And if I'm out with some friends and there's that one who already orders a huge burger and fries, I'll have one fry. I'll pick the biggest one on her plate, and eat it in 5 bites that I really enjoy instead of downing the whole thing without thinking about it. That way, I get the satisfaction of having fries, but not an entire plate and ruining my workout for the day. If my boyfriend has pizza, I'll eat one bite of his slice, and then continue on to my grilled chicken. So what? It's not going to ruin my life. And even if I did eat the WHOLE slice, I'd just watch what I eat the next few days, and I'm fine. No need to beat myself up and skip the gym that day because I had something outside of grilled chicken and broccoli (even though this is my FAVORITE meal....call me crazy....)

    What I'm saying is, ENJOY LIFE! What's the point of having the absolute perfect body because you shut yourself away from the world to avoid any and all temptation? I've still lost 27 lbs since February. Who cares if it could've been 30 lbs by now, I enjoyed life along the way :smile:
  • skyblu263
    skyblu263 Posts: 91 Member
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    WE HAVE TO GIVE UP WINE?!?

    D:

    haha!!!!! that's the mentality i've been having and it has made it hard! "don't drink, blah blah blah." i work for a wine importer for crying out loud!!! everyone has ben so supportive. i know that is no way to live and definitely no way to stay on course. i'll continue to "drink up" within reason :D #newfoundmoderation
  • dogsdogs
    dogsdogs Posts: 10 Member
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    Don't be so hard on yourself. You can have a glass of wine or a small chocolate bar. Life is for living. Try to think about all of the good stuff you can eat. This time of year with all of the fresh vegies and fruit it makes it a little easier. Hang in there.
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
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    I think part of the problem is the CrossFit program itself. It is unrealistic to expect to adhere to that program 100% of the time.

    Try this: instead of thinking of you eating as "don't do that!" think about how eating a snickers bar is doing harm to your body. Think about cellulite, heart disease, type 2 diabetes, liver failure, kidney failure, stroke, hypertension, colon cancer, breast cancer...I think you get the idea. Then when you eat healthy and on program think about things like wearing a bikini and looking smoking hot. Think about reaching that goal (climb a mountain, run a marathon, win a fitness competition) when you are eating healthy and fueling your body properly.

    Go ahead and eat the snickers bar, but think about all that terrible stuff it does to your body while you are eating it. What this accomplishes is a kind of mental conditioning where you begin to associate illness with the flavor of the junk food. Also try looking at photos of people suffering from these illnesses (medical videos are good for this) and envision that snickers bar at the same time. This will doubly impact your feelings on eating junk food and take away all the appeal.

    Lastly, you need to let yourself indulge at least once a week. But don't eat crap like fast food or a snickers bar, really go for it and have a gourmet dessert at a fancy restaurant or from a trendy bakery. Make it an experience and not just grabbing something to stuff in your face. Invite some friends along and have some wine, fancy cheeses, gourmet chocolates, hand made pasta or whatever it is that you love. This will keep you sane and the high quality ingredients will not only make the pleasure of indulging so much more intense, but it is also much better for your body.
  • jesz124
    jesz124 Posts: 1,004 Member
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    I totally agree. I have a very busy life with 3 small children, work part-time with a long commute and a needy DH. I really want to lose 15 lbs. and start exercising regularly. But by the end of the day, I'm exhausted, look forward to a few glasses of wine and don't have the energy to put in an exercise DVD or get on the bike for 30 minutes. I want to look and feel good, but hate that this is yet another thing I have to do in my day. I just wish it wasn't so hard, but at 41 it is hard. I'm going to try and focus on Monday through Friday and not worry about the weekends.

    Sorry if it sounds harsh, but life is hard...Deal with it....Everybody have commutes/kids/spouses/jobs/parents/school etc....It could have been worse - you could have some serious disease, have seriously sick kids/parents whatever life throws at people...
    If you want it enough, you will make it work - and from personal experience, I can promise you that that glass of wine will taste even better (without any guilt) if you have it after the 30D shred.... And btw, getting rid of the eight at 41 is proabaly easier than getting rid of it at 45 or 51....

    I apologise too if my POV offends, but I was thinking exactly the same as the above poster. At some point you have to decide whether you want to carry on eating bad food, drinking too much wine and other junk or do you want to change and loose weight?

    The choice is yours. It isn't easy, it's horrible changing your habits that you think you love. Believe me I would love more than anything to be drinking a vat of red wine now but I know it's no good for me and I don't need to drink it every night. I made a conscious decision to stop drinking during the week days. I still have it and anything else I fancy on a Saturday but the rest of the week I have to face up to the fact that if I want to change myself I have to work hard to undo the bad habits that I have fallen into over the past few years. It's just a question of deciding whether your strong enough to embrace change or not.

    I've only been on here a month and yes already I have days when I think god I cannot be bothered but thats life, we are human, we all have our failings. I just know that being healthy and feeling better about myself already means more to me than downing that wine and chocolate every night.
  • tempest501
    tempest501 Posts: 329 Member
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    I can offer you two magic words Intermittent Fasting. If you do this you don't have to feel guilty anymore and you will still reduce your bodyfat or at least its working for me anyways. If you are intrested check it out at www.leangains.com or look up Eat-stop-eat (or pm me I can inbox the info).

    Also check out a bbc documentary called Eat.fast and live longer (http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b01lxyzc or http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSh6Ot8d7bU)

    It will blow your mind the health benefits alone and lose weight/bodyfat at the same time! Its great.