Never seen a community forum like MFP's!
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Sometimes you gotta take the good with the bad. I would much rather deal with (and ignore) the few not so friendly people just to get help and advice or support from the nice ones. Pessimism and negativity are everywhere, internet, and real life, but if we give attention to those that give it off, it defeats the ones that are actually trying to help.
Can't fight fire with fire....so whenever I see a comment or post where someone is being an *kitten*, I picture myself dumping a bucket of water on their head and walking away on to the next post from someone who could be genuinely nice0 -
Also - I wasn't talking about sunshine and rainbows - I'm talking about people who post in order to say nothing more than : the person who started this thread is an idiot.
Or - commenter above is stupid.
For those who have never belonged to a forum where peolpe didn't behave this way - I have news for you. It doesn't have to be that way. Just like in any gathering, you may or may not like everyone there, but some behaviour isn't tolerated.0 -
Did you see the movie Elf with Will Ferrell? He lives at the North Pole where the make believe world is full of candy and sweet sugar plums and super nice people who fart candy stripped skittles.
The real world is.......0 -
The only thing people on this board have in common with each other is that we're all trying to get in shape and control our weight.
That's an issue that spans the gamut of personality types, from the most immature to the most intelligent, so people that you don't usually associate with are here, as well as the type of people that you do.
Other online forums that I frequent are more exclusive in the people that choose to become part of it. People with similar social views, political views, taste in music, hobbies.
But general forums like this one (or parenting forums oh god the pregnancy and parenting forums) are going to attract everyone, so the average quality is brought down.
I agree that moderation, even member moderation/rating like slashdot or reddit , would be helpful.0 -
MFP is quite tame, actually. And what most people think is mean here is really just silliness. I've seen mean. This ain't it.0
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Some people get on a High Horse when they start making improvements in their lives and feel it makes them above anyone that thinks differently than they do.I am wndering why the culture here is so different.
People get on threads for no reason, it seems, other than to be rude to people, usually the person who started the thread.
Someone posts about a problem, concern, something important to them, if not to you - that's what the boards are for. Instead of people responding because they have something constructive to add - after all, no one is FORCED to respond to anything in a community forum space - there are inevitably comments that are purely trashing the poster!
Why do people bother?
Maybe I belong to particularly polite online communities - and I don't think so, because when people disagree, they are vocal and it does get heated - but troll behaviour like saying a person is stupid for making a post in the first place, or implying it with disdainful, sarcastic remarks - I've never seen it done like it is here, in a decade of belonging to several, completely open public message boards.
Why is this rudeness so common at MFP? People just cranky out of hunger?
It seems that many people trying to change their bodies, their diet, their lifestyle, are particularly in need of support, encouragement, and safe space. Does that vulnerability bring just out the bullies?0 -
I have also noticed there are a lot of 'whiners' here as well.0
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What kind of sites do you frequent? I've been to some of the darkest corners of the internet and MFP seems extremely civil and supportive to me.0
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Also - I wasn't talking about sunshine and rainbows - I'm talking about people who post in order to say nothing more than : the person who started this thread is an idiot.
Or - commenter above is stupid.
For those who have never belonged to a forum where peolpe didn't behave this way - I have news for you. It doesn't have to be that way. Just like in any gathering, you may or may not like everyone there, but some kinds of behaviour isn't tolerated.
Now that you've got all that out - do you feel better?
You have a choice to read the forum or not. Coming in here and blasting your rant is just fueling the fire - done everyday by self-righteous do-gooders and responded to in exactly the same way. You don't like it? Don't let the door hit ya gbadass on the way out. *shrugs*0 -
its because they are hungry0
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If people are so tired of all the other bad naughty people posting things/responding rudely...why do they continue to cruise the forums?
Why do they ALL seem to have to write a new post about it?
If it really bothers you to the point that "you are leaving" - stick to your wall...with YOUR friends.
Leave the forums to those with thicker skin, maybe?0 -
Bacon makes me less stabby, offer more bacon related items.0
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Also - I wasn't talking about sunshine and rainbows - I'm talking about people who post in order to say nothing more than : the person who started this thread is an idiot.
Or - commenter above is stupid.
For those who have never belonged to a forum where peolpe didn't behave this way - I have news for you. It doesn't have to be that way. Just like in any gathering, you may or may not like everyone there, but some kinds of behaviour isn't tolerated.
Now that you've got all that out - do you feel better?
You have a choice to read the forum or not. Coming in here and blasting your rant is just fueling the fire - done everyday by self-righteous do-gooders and responded to in exactly the same way. You don't like it? Don't let the door hit ya gbadass on the way out. *shrugs*
:drinker:0 -
Welcome to MFP! Thanks for sharing! :flowerforyou:0
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From what I've seen out there this site is pretty tame.0
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I find MFP to be mild compared to other places.0
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I don't find this to be that horrible of a forum. There are a lot of nice, supportive people. Think of anyone else as just noise0
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Bacon makes me less stabby, offer more bacon related items.
Bacon just makes it better.0 -
go to 4chan.org and post a picture of your progress. see what happens.0
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This is why I rarely post my own topics on the boards.0
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Also - I wasn't talking about sunshine and rainbows - I'm talking about people who post in order to say nothing more than : the person who started this thread is an idiot.
Or - commenter above is stupid.
For those who have never belonged to a forum where peolpe didn't behave this way - I have news for you. It doesn't have to be that way. Just like in any gathering, you may or may not like everyone there, but some behaviour isn't tolerated.
They belong to life though right? Just because its the internet doesn't mean that the mean people go away.
I get what you are saying but there are groups... Of like minded people. If you go into the group section you will find that the forums are vastly different from the main forums... I know for one I wouldn't belong to a "let's hold hands and be peaceful group" because I'm an *kitten*.. And would get kicked out of the group... Might be worth while to look up groups...0 -
For those people who will say - "this place is just like the rest of the internet" - no, it isn't.
What internet do you use?0 -
The cycling forums that I usually look at are a lot more harsh, rude, and combative than anything I have seen here. What I have noticed is not so much rudeness but lack of serious content to discuss in general (see: "what do you think about the poster above you" type threads)...0
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I have been on tons of forums and in many different places in the world and people are people everywhere. There are all kinds. If you don't go in with any expectations you won't be disappointed.
deniseI am wndering why the culture here is so different.
People get on threads for no reason, it seems, other than to be rude to people, usually the person who started the thread.
Someone posts about a problem, concern, something important to them, if not to you - that's what the boards are for. Instead of people responding because they have something constructive to add - after all, no one is FORCED to respond to anything in a community forum space - there are inevitably comments that are purely trashing the poster!
Why do people bother?
Maybe I belong to particularly polite online communities - and I don't think so, because when people disagree, they are vocal and it does get heated - but troll behaviour like saying a person is stupid for making a post in the first place, or implying it with disdainful, sarcastic remarks - I've never seen it done like it is here, in a decade of belonging to several, completely open public message boards.
Why is this rudeness so common at MFP? People just cranky out of hunger?
It seems that many people trying to change their bodies, their diet, their lifestyle, are particularly in need of support, encouragement, and safe space. Does that vulnerability bring just out the bullies?0 -
I'm just going to sit back and watch this thread go to pieces, like the one posted two days ago on the same topic did. Let's see how long it will take for this thread to be locked and then deleted. Bet you a chocolate candy bar that it won't make two days!
You're on.
I mean no offense to OP, because this is a common feeling, but it's also a common feeling across almost every discussion board on any web site. I've been participating in and sometimes running discussion boards since the BBS days, and it's pretty much been the same thing since then.
There are a few exceptions, but most of those are boards where people know each other in real life and knowing you'll be seeing the other person in person soon is a great self-moderating incentive. The rest are bland boards that are either moderated to the point where no one dares disagree with the moderators, or where everyone is there with a shared interest in which there is no room for debate.
Start a board on toothpick holders, and within a week you'll have a heated argument over ceramic versus stainless with people shouting at each other in all caps and threatening each others' children with mortal harm. It happens. As the current XKCD says, human subcultures are nested fractally. No matter how obscure your interest is, there's going to be someone out there with a heartfelt opinion about that interest that the two of you will be able to engage in a vigorous debate over it. Add the anonymity of the Internet and the lack of emotional tones in text (and the natural human tendency to read the nastiest tone in anything from someone with a disagreeing opinion that lacks an emotional inflection) and you have shouting matches. Constantly.
Add a topic for which there is so incredibly much conflicting science, a lot of amassed conflicting personal experience, and is as deeply personal as weight loss... and throw in that most of the participants are eating at some level of deficit and mostly pretty stressed about trying to fight millions of years of evolution by losing weight... Yeah, we get all cranky sometimes. And we take things too personally.
Present company included. On this board and others, I've inadvertently offended plenty of people. And been unjustifiably offended by plenty of people who I later realized didn't mean anything at all by what they said - I just disagreed with the content and therefore read an unpleasant tone into a neutrally-intended statement.
It happens. Text is a miserable communications medium, and human nature seems to be to find the differences, not the similarities, between us and others.0 -
If people are so tired of all the other bad naughty people posting things/responding rudely...why do they continue to cruise the forums?
Why do they ALL seem to have to write a new post about it?
If it really bothers you to the point that "you are leaving" - stick to your wall...with YOUR friends.
Leave the forums to those with thicker skin, maybe?0 -
The cycling forums that I usually look at are a lot more harsh, rude, and combative than anything I have seen here. What I have noticed is not so much rudeness but lack of serious content to discuss in general (see: "what do you think about the poster above you" type threads)...
i give you a 9 for hotness cuz i'm a sucker for a guy in lyrca.0 -
I think people need to stop getting so butt hurt about sarcastic, "rude", off the wall, etc. comments in the threads.
Most people who respond to threads are helpful and supportive, but in my opinion, these other non-helpful comments can be entertaining as well. I'm very sarcastic at times, and I'll throw in some sarcasim here in there, myself. Sorry I'm not sorry.0 -
I believe there was a topic just like this yesterday...and the day before...and the day before that.
While you're right, you're beating a dead horse. Not everyone is going to be positive all the time. It's impractical.0 -
de ja vu0
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