Never seen a community forum like MFP's!

245678

Replies

  • mlashay
    mlashay Posts: 166 Member
    Sometimes you gotta take the good with the bad. I would much rather deal with (and ignore) the few not so friendly people just to get help and advice or support from the nice ones. Pessimism and negativity are everywhere, internet, and real life, but if we give attention to those that give it off, it defeats the ones that are actually trying to help.

    Can't fight fire with fire....so whenever I see a comment or post where someone is being an *kitten*, I picture myself dumping a bucket of water on their head and walking away on to the next post from someone who could be genuinely nice :smile:
  • gdbadass
    gdbadass Posts: 60
    Also - I wasn't talking about sunshine and rainbows - I'm talking about people who post in order to say nothing more than : the person who started this thread is an idiot.

    Or - commenter above is stupid.

    For those who have never belonged to a forum where peolpe didn't behave this way - I have news for you. It doesn't have to be that way. Just like in any gathering, you may or may not like everyone there, but some behaviour isn't tolerated.
  • _Timmeh_
    _Timmeh_ Posts: 2,096 Member
    Did you see the movie Elf with Will Ferrell? He lives at the North Pole where the make believe world is full of candy and sweet sugar plums and super nice people who fart candy stripped skittles.

    The real world is.......
  • maspicantexfa
    maspicantexfa Posts: 73 Member
    The only thing people on this board have in common with each other is that we're all trying to get in shape and control our weight.

    That's an issue that spans the gamut of personality types, from the most immature to the most intelligent, so people that you don't usually associate with are here, as well as the type of people that you do.

    Other online forums that I frequent are more exclusive in the people that choose to become part of it. People with similar social views, political views, taste in music, hobbies.

    But general forums like this one (or parenting forums oh god the pregnancy and parenting forums) are going to attract everyone, so the average quality is brought down.

    I agree that moderation, even member moderation/rating like slashdot or reddit , would be helpful.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    MFP is quite tame, actually. And what most people think is mean here is really just silliness. I've seen mean. This ain't it.
  • Heaven71
    Heaven71 Posts: 706 Member
    Some people get on a High Horse when they start making improvements in their lives and feel it makes them above anyone that thinks differently than they do.
    I am wndering why the culture here is so different.

    People get on threads for no reason, it seems, other than to be rude to people, usually the person who started the thread.

    Someone posts about a problem, concern, something important to them, if not to you - that's what the boards are for. Instead of people responding because they have something constructive to add - after all, no one is FORCED to respond to anything in a community forum space - there are inevitably comments that are purely trashing the poster!

    Why do people bother?

    Maybe I belong to particularly polite online communities - and I don't think so, because when people disagree, they are vocal and it does get heated - but troll behaviour like saying a person is stupid for making a post in the first place, or implying it with disdainful, sarcastic remarks - I've never seen it done like it is here, in a decade of belonging to several, completely open public message boards.

    Why is this rudeness so common at MFP? People just cranky out of hunger? :)

    It seems that many people trying to change their bodies, their diet, their lifestyle, are particularly in need of support, encouragement, and safe space. Does that vulnerability bring just out the bullies?
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    I have also noticed there are a lot of 'whiners' here as well.
  • camrunner
    camrunner Posts: 363
    What kind of sites do you frequent? I've been to some of the darkest corners of the internet and MFP seems extremely civil and supportive to me.
  • Also - I wasn't talking about sunshine and rainbows - I'm talking about people who post in order to say nothing more than : the person who started this thread is an idiot.

    Or - commenter above is stupid.

    For those who have never belonged to a forum where peolpe didn't behave this way - I have news for you. It doesn't have to be that way. Just like in any gathering, you may or may not like everyone there, but some kinds of behaviour isn't tolerated.

    Now that you've got all that out - do you feel better?
    You have a choice to read the forum or not. Coming in here and blasting your rant is just fueling the fire - done everyday by self-righteous do-gooders and responded to in exactly the same way. You don't like it? Don't let the door hit ya gbadass on the way out. *shrugs*
  • drmerc
    drmerc Posts: 2,603 Member
    its because they are hungry
  • starracer23
    starracer23 Posts: 1,011 Member
    If people are so tired of all the other bad naughty people posting things/responding rudely...why do they continue to cruise the forums?

    Why do they ALL seem to have to write a new post about it?

    If it really bothers you to the point that "you are leaving" - stick to your wall...with YOUR friends. :)
    Leave the forums to those with thicker skin, maybe?
  • _Timmeh_
    _Timmeh_ Posts: 2,096 Member
    Bacon makes me less stabby, offer more bacon related items.
  • CaWaterBug8
    CaWaterBug8 Posts: 1,040 Member
    Also - I wasn't talking about sunshine and rainbows - I'm talking about people who post in order to say nothing more than : the person who started this thread is an idiot.

    Or - commenter above is stupid.

    For those who have never belonged to a forum where peolpe didn't behave this way - I have news for you. It doesn't have to be that way. Just like in any gathering, you may or may not like everyone there, but some kinds of behaviour isn't tolerated.

    Now that you've got all that out - do you feel better?
    You have a choice to read the forum or not. Coming in here and blasting your rant is just fueling the fire - done everyday by self-righteous do-gooders and responded to in exactly the same way. You don't like it? Don't let the door hit ya gbadass on the way out. *shrugs*

    :drinker:
  • california_peach
    california_peach Posts: 1,809 Member
    Welcome to MFP! Thanks for sharing! :flowerforyou:
  • LifeOnMars_
    LifeOnMars_ Posts: 720 Member
    From what I've seen out there this site is pretty tame.
  • FireBrand80
    FireBrand80 Posts: 378 Member
    I find MFP to be mild compared to other places.
  • onyxgirl17
    onyxgirl17 Posts: 1,722 Member
    I don't find this to be that horrible of a forum. There are a lot of nice, supportive people. Think of anyone else as just noise ;)
  • CaWaterBug8
    CaWaterBug8 Posts: 1,040 Member
    Bacon makes me less stabby, offer more bacon related items.

    bacon-starry-night.jpg

    Bacon just makes it better.
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    go to 4chan.org and post a picture of your progress. see what happens.
  • ChaseAlder
    ChaseAlder Posts: 804 Member
    This is why I rarely post my own topics on the boards.
  • WickedBean
    WickedBean Posts: 244 Member
    Also - I wasn't talking about sunshine and rainbows - I'm talking about people who post in order to say nothing more than : the person who started this thread is an idiot.

    Or - commenter above is stupid.

    For those who have never belonged to a forum where peolpe didn't behave this way - I have news for you. It doesn't have to be that way. Just like in any gathering, you may or may not like everyone there, but some behaviour isn't tolerated.

    They belong to life though right? Just because its the internet doesn't mean that the mean people go away.

    I get what you are saying but there are groups... Of like minded people. If you go into the group section you will find that the forums are vastly different from the main forums... I know for one I wouldn't belong to a "let's hold hands and be peaceful group" because I'm an *kitten*.. And would get kicked out of the group... Might be worth while to look up groups...
  • spade117
    spade117 Posts: 2,466 Member
    For those people who will say - "this place is just like the rest of the internet" - no, it isn't.

    What internet do you use?
  • CentralCaliCycling
    CentralCaliCycling Posts: 453 Member
    The cycling forums that I usually look at are a lot more harsh, rude, and combative than anything I have seen here. What I have noticed is not so much rudeness but lack of serious content to discuss in general (see: "what do you think about the poster above you" type threads)...
  • NWCountryGal
    NWCountryGal Posts: 1,992 Member
    I have been on tons of forums and in many different places in the world and people are people everywhere. There are all kinds. If you don't go in with any expectations you won't be disappointed.

    denise
    I am wndering why the culture here is so different.

    People get on threads for no reason, it seems, other than to be rude to people, usually the person who started the thread.

    Someone posts about a problem, concern, something important to them, if not to you - that's what the boards are for. Instead of people responding because they have something constructive to add - after all, no one is FORCED to respond to anything in a community forum space - there are inevitably comments that are purely trashing the poster!

    Why do people bother?

    Maybe I belong to particularly polite online communities - and I don't think so, because when people disagree, they are vocal and it does get heated - but troll behaviour like saying a person is stupid for making a post in the first place, or implying it with disdainful, sarcastic remarks - I've never seen it done like it is here, in a decade of belonging to several, completely open public message boards.

    Why is this rudeness so common at MFP? People just cranky out of hunger? :)

    It seems that many people trying to change their bodies, their diet, their lifestyle, are particularly in need of support, encouragement, and safe space. Does that vulnerability bring just out the bullies?
  • myfitnessnmhoy
    myfitnessnmhoy Posts: 2,105 Member
    I'm just going to sit back and watch this thread go to pieces, like the one posted two days ago on the same topic did. Let's see how long it will take for this thread to be locked and then deleted. Bet you a chocolate candy bar that it won't make two days!

    You're on.

    I mean no offense to OP, because this is a common feeling, but it's also a common feeling across almost every discussion board on any web site. I've been participating in and sometimes running discussion boards since the BBS days, and it's pretty much been the same thing since then.

    There are a few exceptions, but most of those are boards where people know each other in real life and knowing you'll be seeing the other person in person soon is a great self-moderating incentive. The rest are bland boards that are either moderated to the point where no one dares disagree with the moderators, or where everyone is there with a shared interest in which there is no room for debate.

    Start a board on toothpick holders, and within a week you'll have a heated argument over ceramic versus stainless with people shouting at each other in all caps and threatening each others' children with mortal harm. It happens. As the current XKCD says, human subcultures are nested fractally. No matter how obscure your interest is, there's going to be someone out there with a heartfelt opinion about that interest that the two of you will be able to engage in a vigorous debate over it. Add the anonymity of the Internet and the lack of emotional tones in text (and the natural human tendency to read the nastiest tone in anything from someone with a disagreeing opinion that lacks an emotional inflection) and you have shouting matches. Constantly.

    Add a topic for which there is so incredibly much conflicting science, a lot of amassed conflicting personal experience, and is as deeply personal as weight loss... and throw in that most of the participants are eating at some level of deficit and mostly pretty stressed about trying to fight millions of years of evolution by losing weight... Yeah, we get all cranky sometimes. And we take things too personally.

    Present company included. On this board and others, I've inadvertently offended plenty of people. And been unjustifiably offended by plenty of people who I later realized didn't mean anything at all by what they said - I just disagreed with the content and therefore read an unpleasant tone into a neutrally-intended statement.

    It happens. Text is a miserable communications medium, and human nature seems to be to find the differences, not the similarities, between us and others.
  • rhonniema
    rhonniema Posts: 522 Member
    If people are so tired of all the other bad naughty people posting things/responding rudely...why do they continue to cruise the forums?

    Why do they ALL seem to have to write a new post about it?

    If it really bothers you to the point that "you are leaving" - stick to your wall...with YOUR friends. :)
    Leave the forums to those with thicker skin, maybe?
    :love: :drinker:
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    The cycling forums that I usually look at are a lot more harsh, rude, and combative than anything I have seen here. What I have noticed is not so much rudeness but lack of serious content to discuss in general (see: "what do you think about the poster above you" type threads)...


    i give you a 9 for hotness cuz i'm a sucker for a guy in lyrca.
  • KittieLea
    KittieLea Posts: 1,156 Member
    I think people need to stop getting so butt hurt about sarcastic, "rude", off the wall, etc. comments in the threads.
    Most people who respond to threads are helpful and supportive, but in my opinion, these other non-helpful comments can be entertaining as well. I'm very sarcastic at times, and I'll throw in some sarcasim here in there, myself. Sorry I'm not sorry.
  • mynameiscarrie
    mynameiscarrie Posts: 963 Member
    I believe there was a topic just like this yesterday...and the day before...and the day before that.

    While you're right, you're beating a dead horse. Not everyone is going to be positive all the time. It's impractical.
  • meerkat70
    meerkat70 Posts: 4,605 Member
    de ja vu