Part of me really wants to stop getting on here...

r5wr

I'm still new, but been here about a week of so and have only found a handful of nice people as bad as that.sounds. the nice people are reallyyyy nice, but other than that it seems like everyone's been so.rude, to.me not.to.others. like I post a topic and get a lot of sarcastically rude replies... I came here for motivation and support not to.be pushed down even more. Some of you are real.nice to me and I thank.you but.overall I've been treated rather bad. And the site helps.when I.keep.to myself but as soon as interact everyone becomes so mean.. yet I see everyone being so.nice to everyone else. I don't know what I've done or am not doing.to get treated the same. I'm just tempted to leave cause of the way people are toward me. Anyone else feeling the same? Anyone NOT hoof.to be sarcastically and rude want to try and change my opinion of.the majority of people on here? Feel.free to.add me... I'm staying for a while but if it downs change I.may leave... I just want the experience everyone else is having... Like I said feel free to add but please don't be rude on comments on this. If there is any... Goodnight guys.




*sorry for typos and stuff on my.phone with a crappy keyboard that likes periods.*

DrJanet98

I'm sorry you've had bad experiences here. I've had it happen to me either way on various message boards. Some posts get friendly responses and some get snarky ones, and it seems almost random which one you get sometimes. You may have just been unlucky. Or, you might have posted things that have been posted a hundred times before. Try running a few searches for other posts on your topic before you start a new one.

It's important to be able to feel comfortable sharing. If you really feel like you can't speak freely here because of your bad experiences so far, there are plenty of other online support groups to try. This one really does seem to be a good one overall, and all boards have their share of jerks, but I won't claim this is the best fit for *everyone*! I hope you'll be able to find what you need, whether it's here or on some other message board that you find suits you better. Like you said, there are a lot of nice people here, so please don't jump ship too soon -- give us another chance!

joecollins9385

a lot of people on here are probably just cranky because they are starving lol try to ignore them. there are a lot of nice people here too.

MsSheri82

a lot of people on here are probably just cranky because they are starving lol try to ignore them. there are a lot of nice people here too.
[/quote

I was thinking the same thing..lol

adorability

Lol at what Joe said, that could be true. Also, not a lot of people get sarcasm over the internet

hopeful_heather

sorry you have had such a bad experience. this place really is great. you just have to ignore some people. this site really is the best and will do wonders if you stick to it. dont give up. its still early. give it more time and you will see. i'll add you

MiaOrange

I've been on here for about a year. I do see a lot of rude posts. Yes, I agree rude comments are not very supportive. I have wanted to quit this site also, but figure, I can a least log my calories and exercise for ME and if I'm not getting support; just lay low for a little while. In hard times I have posted that I needed friends for support and have gotten several positive responses.

Hang in there, you are doing a great job!

LilacDreamer

MFP is like the bottle, you need a 12 step program to break its spell.

RunsOnEspresso

Unfortunately that is the nature of the internet. People feel free to say things they may not say in real life because we are just tiny pics to them (and not everyone has their face or even any part of them as an avatar). It makes it easier to be mean or rude. I have found this all over the internet. Plus it is hard to get context online. There's no inflection, no body signs, eye contact etc to judge the full meaning.

rextcat

not being mean

please remember all meme's are ment as A; joke or B; sarcazim,
this one is both
and well we all like to flog the new gie it realy isnt personal, trust me
but if the forums bug you that much, avoid them:happy: good luck on you weight loss


ps im a 13 stepper:bigsmile:

paleirishmother

I feel the same way, I'll have a genuine question about food,or exercise and I would ask on the forum (help and support), there is always some buffed up shirtless guy making me feel like a total idiot for even asking! I hate it..I've learned to build my friends list up, delete the people that bug me along the way..and then I will have a good group to help answer any questions I might have, less likely to be rude to me, more likely to help

Unknown

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lajonna

Awe I'm sorry hun! Don' t the rude people, whom are most likely frustrated with their own weight problems get to you. They just need to stop being rude on here & go work out those lil frustrations of theirs. And don't think for one minute that there is something wrong with you & that's why they are being rude. You're beautiful & are trying to better yourself health wise and emotionally. You're the bigger person. Kudos sista! Keep up the hard work ( :

Nerdy_Rose

I creeped your forum posts.
I noticed you like root beer.
IBC DIET ROOT BEER IS SO DELICIOUS.
that is all

Dawnea64

It is a shame that people cant put their problems to aside and try to be supportive to someone. I try to treat people the way I wish to be treated, please dont give up. You know when you take a rose and smell it, it is sweet but if you grab it wrong it prickes your fingers. Well I usally snip (ignore) off the thorns and enjoy the smell (positive people). We are out here and we can at least understand, because some of us are going thru simular problems like you. Hugs

Hang in there Babe
Dawnea

dvisser1

I've been on here since January and have seen both the good and bad sides to MFP. The good side of MFP is really great, it's an awesome tool that helps you take control of your diet with clear visibility of what you are eating and what a healthy goal is when used correctly (as in be honest and diligent about logging everything daily). The bad side of MFP is that it's an open and anonymous message board on the internet, which makes some people think they can and should say whatever they want. As in real life, some people are just mean and always seem to have an opinion about everything. There are also people who might very well be well meaning in their intent, but don't come across that way because there is no context to type (no body language, voice inflection, etc.).

I've also found a small but very vocal group of people who fashion themselves as experts simply because they stumbled into a way of losing weight and getting fit that has worked very well for them. By the completely illogical extension of the logic that says "it worked for me so it will work for everyone, and now I must criticize anyone who disagrees with me or does not do exactly as I did". While they may have some solid advice once in a while, the opinion part of every one of there posts should just be ignored.

I don't go on the message forum so much anymore because I got tired of answering the same question every other day and found myself starting to give snarky answers. Search function works well and should be used more.

Hope you continue to use MFP and see the good side of it being so great it out weighs the bad side.

xshortiex

Aww.. I kind of (sort of) felt the same way when I started this, but then I remembered: whatever I'm doing here, I'm doing it for ME, not for anyone else. So in the end, it doesn't matter how cranky MFPers are, because it shouldn't affect my progress or my life regardless of whether or not I use the site (if that makes sense).

I'm glad you were able to find a few people who you can rely on for motivation; I'd love to be one of them if you want to add me!

Here2GetFit

Personally, I am not a believer of the notion that people are in general good. I believe, in general, people suck. Good people are the exception, not the norm. The internet just allows people to be more openly nasty.

Surround yourself with supportive people, and stay off the message boards. That is my best advice for you.

r5wr

Thank you everyone for your responses its much appreciated... As for.posting the same things I.swear I haven't!! I love the search bar! The last post that sent me over edge was just complaning about sodium in v8 and of anyone else had something like that.. but thank.you all very much!

Jenloma

Have more confidence with yourself and you'll find that others don't matter.
That really sucks cause I've never had that problem on this site. Just DELETE them!

RainHoward

About a year or so ago I made an attempt to use MPF. It was a horrid experience. I quite. I gained weight. I checked out other websites of similar design, there are many of them. I found that most of them are the same. I forgot that the world is full of douche bags with nothing better to do than bring others down. The internet seems to bring out the worst of them. My best advice to you, learn to ignore them.

MFP can be a great tool and there are some fabulous people on here. It can also make you crazy and piss you off. I read so much erroneous information on here every day I cringe repeatedly. People spout opinion as fact, belittle those that don't think the same as they do and generally make a nuisance of themselves. Gladly, they are very easy to ignore.

I read through most of your posts and I will make one suggestion that is meant as constructive criticism and with your profile stating you want to become a published writer it's something that should be important to you anyway. Work on your typing, check your spelling. Nothing brings out the trolls faster than bad grammar and poor spelling.

melaniecheeks

I read through the sodium in V8 thread and I honestly can't see what was the problem with it - you asked a question (and to be honest, the way you asked it might be seen by some as aggressive), people gave their thoughts, nobody suggested you were wrong or stupid.....was there a particular post that you felt was rude?

avocado12

I don't ask questions on here, as I fear being ridiculed or have my post quoted and then mocked etc - I stick to replying instead and using the search bar. I know exactly how you feel! X

theartichoke

not being mean

please remember all meme's are ment as A; joke or B; sarcazim,
this one is both
and well we all like to flog the new gie it realy isnt personal, trust me
but if the forums bug you that much, avoid them:happy: good luck on you weight loss


ps im a 13 stepper:bigsmile:

A 13th stepper! Shame on you. You're banned. :grumble:

flynnfinn

i'm sorry you've been treated terrible by others on here. and i agree with you that people should leave sarcasm out of their replies. but what i find is that it is easier to be sarcastic when you can hide behind your computer. trust me, if you came face to face with these people, i'm sure they would talk to you that way.

so take it all with a grain of salt. people seem to think they can be all high and mighty on here when all they're really doing is hiding behind a computer facade. just ignore it and focus on the positive aspects of MFP.

lauren3101

Regardless of what this site is about, this is still a forum, and you will always get a wide range of people on here.

Take it from a woman that's been a member of many mostly male car forums: you learn to filter out the idiots after a while.

opuntia

How I see it is that there's a lot of guys here who do a lot of weight lifting, and who have been very tough with themselves to get into the shape they're in. A lot of testosterone kicking around. Such guys are less likely, realistically, to be the touchy-feely types! And they probably wouldn't want people being touchy-feely with them, so they say the kind of stuff they'd say to themselves and expect others to say to them. You don't have to add those guys to your friends list though. You can post in the Introductions forum that you'd like gentle, encouraging people to be your friends, for mutual support. And search for people in that forum who are also asking for the same thing, and add them.

Also, the people who use the forums are likely to be a very small percentage of the people who use MyFitnessPal as a whole. And in my experience, people who like using public forums a lot are often the people who are full of opinions and like to express them, and often like a bit of debate/argument!

Mishadijo

This is YOUR journey. My advice... draw strength from all the people and interactions if you can. For those who are supportive, embrace it! For those who are more, 'toxic', draw strength of your convictions and use that to become stronger. You see, whether it is on here, or in real life... you will always need to deal with both... wonderfully supportive people, and those that through their actions or words are quite, 'toxic'...

At the end of the day, this is YOUR journey and NOBODY else's. Keep it as your priority and don't let anyone sway you from your health, and your goals. What you are doing is inspirational, please do not despair. People are human and it takes all kinds to make the world go around. Draw the strength from within you, and your convictions. View the support you get, as a 'bonus'. View the 'toxicity' as 'not your problem, but someone elses problem' and smile... a lot. Feel great about what you are doing!! Always!!!!

These are just my thoughts... not saying they are right ... but are mine and happy to share them.

Restybaby2012

R5...........awwwwww ...dont let the bullys rock your world lil one. Keep in mind what you're doing here, who you are and what you want. We all get a tad pissy now and then. Ive done it myself. I tend to handle a lot of things with absolute humor...or a "Killer" story. Killer is my cat. Thats her pic over there
<~~~~See the exclamation mark on her lil fur covered chunkyy face? She's my lil 15 lb ball of fat with legs!!
She is my diva...my 4th child such as it were. I would hope someone would message me if Ive ever upset them or been outta line. I got snarked at with one of my first few posts and was briefly offended. BUT.....then I hadda think.....hard. My thought was "well dumba$$ ya put yourself out there an ask a direct question seeking assistance and what....... expected everyone to baby your *kitten* and tell ya what you wanted to hear versus what was/is?" DUH. I didnt repeat the mistake and now I know who to be wary off and who to accept and seek out. Im just a somewhat chubby but INCREDIBLY cute slightly over 5......5...........5..................uhh.....aaaaa....errrrrr...ummm.....over 40 YA THATS IT!! over 40 lady thats got weight to lose and friends to make.

Add me........we'll support each other. (I dont bark though I do growl a lot sometimes)

sheeeeeeeeeeesh I dont type so good at 4am

PaulieUK

There will always be internet trolls and generally nasty people. You won't get away from it. I had a fair few people added as friends and only a couple were genuinely on here to lose weight, to get help and to give it. I cut those who I found offensive and demoralising because I can't filter them out and I don't see why I should have to.

mrscreager

I read through the sodium in V8 thread and I honestly can't see what was the problem with it - you asked a question (and to be honest, the way you asked it might be seen by some as aggressive), people gave their thoughts, nobody suggested you were wrong or stupid.....was there a particular post that you felt was rude?

ditto!!