What weightloss does to people

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Replies

  • head_in_rainbows
    head_in_rainbows Posts: 290 Member
    I would think that weightloss would make you humble and very into helping others that were once in your shoes.

    It does (the helping others part at least).

    However ex-fat people can see right through the excuses, half truths, and weaknesses of fat people. For many fat people their lives are built on them. People who haven't been fat are often lacking in this vision, because they haven't been there.

    A lot of fat people aren't ready to hear the truth. Being humble also means being an enabler of the excuses, half truths, and weaknesses that are keeping you fat. The ex-fat have learned how to be harsh and unweilding with ourselves, to not accept excuses and weakness.

    The ex fat can only show you the door. If you don't want to see the door, you certainly aren't willing to step through it.

    My thoughts exactyly.
  • PaveGurl
    PaveGurl Posts: 244 Member
    I've had people call me a "skinny b!t(h" because I've lost weight.

    the only thing that's changed is that I feel happy in my skin for the first time. I'm proud of the work I've done - and I work *HARD* at taking care of myself now, in a way I never have before.

    I haven't been doing this as long as some, and I have less to lose, overall, than others. That doesn't make it easier, and I actually actively avoid trying to talk about it because I'm afraid I'll be seen as rubbing it in someone's face or being cruel.

    In Janaury, when I began, I sat down w/ my BF (and his roommate) and said "I'm gonna go ahead and apologise in advance, 'cos I'm gonna start exercising, which I hate, and working to lose weight, which I don't wanna, so I'm gonna be a miserable excuse for a human being." I was completely shocked when I started being the person pushing my workout buddies to go to the gym for our scheduled workouts. When did I start liking this stuff? When I realised the changes were visable, it was really hard to NOT want to shoult about how incredibly proud I was - not because I wanted to tear anyone down, but because HOLY SMOKES YOU GUYS I DID THIS! ME!!

    That's what I think of when I see your post - that they're so proud and excited, they are having a tough time holding it in. It may not be about "hey, you're tubby" but about "OMG! I can't believe I managed to accomplish this!"

    (This hits home especially for me 'cos my BF is one of my workout buddies, and he's not lost weight/ inches at the same rate, and it can sometimes make him irritable to not see the same kind of progress. But I am much more stringent about my diet and exercise routines, so it makes sense that I'm making more progress -- he just doesn't LIKE it ;P)
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    What's wrong with being slutty?

    nothing so long as your on the right side of 30?

    OMFG HOLD ME BACK
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    I would think that weightloss would make you humble and very into helping others that were once in your shoes.

    It does (the helping others part at least).

    However ex-fat people can see right through the excuses, half truths, and weaknesses of fat people. For many fat people their lives are built on them. People who haven't been fat are often lacking in this vision, because they haven't been there.

    A lot of fat people aren't ready to hear the truth. Being humble also means being an enabler of the excuses, half truths, and weaknesses that are keeping you fat. The ex-fat have learned how to be harsh and unweilding with ourselves, to not accept excuses and weakness.

    The ex fat can only show you the door. If you don't want to see the door, you certainly aren't willing to step through it.

    My thoughts exactyly.

    AGREED times three
  • Brandicaloriecountess
    Brandicaloriecountess Posts: 2,126 Member
    You know it is REALLY like a social experiment. I feel like I have been two different people. I finally can live the life I want. I am not superficial or slutty, but I am active, I dance, I run in 5ks and I go to workout classes for fun.

    But people treat you VERY differently. I did not have people be rude to me, but indifferent I guess *strangers* now I get so much attention and it feels WEIRD. I never know how to take.
  • kristen6022
    kristen6022 Posts: 1,923 Member
    My weight loss hasn't made me slutty, or trampy, or arrogant. I'm still the same person I was a wearing a size 16 and I am now at a 4/6. Thinner, yes. Fitter, yes. More educated yes. More confident, heck yes. My weight loss has made a stronger person. Not physically, but mentally. I proved to myself that I could set a goal and exceed it. I'm now 10 pounds less than I thought possible and actually attempting to gain a few pounds back.

    OP, I hope that when you get to where you are going you lose the crappy attitude. Just because someone has fought and won the battle doesn't mean they are any less of a person than you are.
  • kochou
    kochou Posts: 19 Member
    i grew up as the fat kid everyone made fun of. when we moved from AUS to the US it was a pretty tough adjustment. i was 165 lbs when i was 10 years old. i finally lost weight when i got into sports in high-school (field hockey). i've been anywhere from 110 lbs to 165 lbs. i have always remained the same tomboy/jock/nerd through it all. i was one of those girls who didn't go through a slut phase. i think going from fat to thin is very similar as going from high-school to college - it's a new experience, it's a new sense of freedom for some people. it also bears in mind who you really are inside - when i went to college i was still living in the library as opposed to the sorority house. i lost 15 lbs instead of gaining the Freshman 15. it really does boil down to who a person is on the inside. i agree with the people who posted before - it reveals who you are.
  • LeslieC1970
    LeslieC1970 Posts: 160
    I agree with this statement. Most of the time it is their own insecurities that make them do these things. And some are just that way to begin with.
  • Rachelle_Ohh
    Rachelle_Ohh Posts: 146 Member
    Weightloss has it's ups and downs I guess. If they're cocky, be cockier.
  • Rachelle_Ohh
    Rachelle_Ohh Posts: 146 Member
    Just dip me in some melted butter, man. No one has to know.

    MFP will know. :(

    LMFAO Nice one
  • kolkol
    kolkol Posts: 300 Member
    I know several people like this. It is really sad to see actually. I have several clients who have lost weight and ended up in divorce court as well which to me is crazy. My husband loves me for me not for my weight.

    this exactly! except for im not married, but my fiance met me at my biggest & im about 25 lbs lighter than when we met so im good :-) & id never leave him once i get to goal.
  • caro1275
    caro1275 Posts: 198 Member
    Hi,

    Just because someone has lost the weight, doesn't mean they have figured out their issues as to why they gained the weight or were heavy in the first place. I've read all sorts of articles where people who lose weight turn to other addictions such as: alcohol, pills, shopping, men etc. when they haven't dealt with their issues/behavior patterns. And as others have mentioned; some people are not used to the attention they receive once they do lose the weight or the exact opposite- they have these great expectations that life is going to be wonderful once the weight is lost and then......it's not.

    You are not eveyone else- so I am not sure why you are concerned that you will be like "them" if you focus on you and your issues. Just because someone reaches their goal weight that doesn't mean the work is necessarily done! That is how I am looking at things this time around and hopefully I will be successful in keeping the weightless off for good.

    c-
  • amy_hutto
    amy_hutto Posts: 3
    I cannot speak for others, but for me it is a little strange being on this side. I am self conscious and unsure sometimes about the way that I can dress. But on the positive side, I am so excited to share with anyone who wants to know about my loss. I want everyone to try it. I want everyone to have success with it like I did. Unfortunately, that does not always happen.

    I truly hope that you can find people to help you along the way. I would be happy to share with you about my journey and what worked for me. I am just now getting to where I want to be and I pray that the maintenance program works for me and my husband as well as the diet did. Keep your chin up girl! You are beautiful inside and out!
  • thingal12
    thingal12 Posts: 302 Member
    In regards to weight, my oldest sister and I are at opposite places. When we were young, I was always the thin one and she was the chubby one (30-40 pounds overweight). When she went to college, she lost a lot of weight and became a size 2 (after being a 10-12 for a llong time). When I was in college, I gained weight (from a size 4 to a size 12-14). We both gained and lost another two times after college. She has kids and is married, and I don't have either. One major thing she does that really bugs me is her attitude towards weight. As a kid, she must have felt as though skinny people rule and fat chubby people are ugly and disgusting. Her attitude is very hurtful- to me and her own kids. She has three kids, two of whom took after her chubbyness as a kid. Her entire family goes to Lifetime 4 times a week. Her kids are active, too. Still, 2/3 are chubby and they have an appetite for food (just like her and her husband). My sister is now a size 2-4 and I'm a size 6-8. But, a couple of years ago, when I was a size 8-10, she would give me a very hard time about it. She was very very harsh. She would tell me that the reason i'm not married is because of my weight. I don't share my relationship life with her, but that's very wrong (many men love my curvy butt!). I told her off a few times and would tell my other sisters to talk to her about it, she was & is still getting nastier and nastier. She also yells at her kids if they eat chips or any junk food. "You're so fat! Stop eating!" omg! She's got some major psychological issues! My sister-in-law who is a size 0 is her competitor. My sister thinks she can be a size 0 too so she starves herself all the time! I have to speak to her husband, my bro-in-law about this.. she has to get some help.
  • icimani
    icimani Posts: 1,454 Member
    Some people are just jerks, and weight loss or gain isn't going to change that. I have a brother in law who's lost about 95 lbs and I give him all the credit in the world, but he's a sanctimonious sob about most everything and his weight loss just gives him one more way to feel/act superior. It's kinda like some people who quit smoking - they feel/act superior over everyone who is still smoking.
  • JuliexAnne
    JuliexAnne Posts: 32
    It's definitely hard for me to hear people commenting that I look good. I have a friend of 6 years who all of a sudden is telling me to stop being so sexy. It's hard for me to take. I'm the same person I was before, why can't you see that?! Definitely not one of the people that lets it get to my head. I see a person who still has a long way to go and I still look in the mirror and say "I look fat". I find I tell myself I look pretty a lot more, but seeing the actual weight loss is difficult unless I make a side by side comparison picture.
  • Platypusimus
    Platypusimus Posts: 33 Member
    Weight loss has had nothing but positive influences on me. Sure I start at myself in the mirror a lot more, but who doesn't like admiring their handiwork!? And I've gotten huge boosts in confidence as my waistline shrunk!

    ^^This. And back off on the negativity everybody! Jeebuz... try looking at it from the perspective of someone who is trying to HELP you. *sigh*

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