who is the oldest here to give birth?
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I was kidding...I didn't take offense!!
I will say that it's hard. I had pre-eclampsia so she needed to come out 2 months early. They tried to induce me. Nothing. When you are 2 months shy of 44 and never carried a baby to term let alone given birth your body is simply NOT going to give it up 2 months early. C-Section for me.Of course many women have babies after they're in their 40s without reproductive assistance...I didh't mean to imply otherwise, or that it was impossible. The percentage I gave was for my situation--being over 38 and never having conceived at all. And being in the 2% success group doesn't make one a "freak"...Well then I'm a freak of nature.
This, this, THIS!! I got married at almost 40 for the first time, waited a year to try for a baby, thought it would be a cinch (I'm one of four, my sister has 5). We went through 2 cycles of IVF (4 and 6 years after we were married)...the second "took". According to my doctor, my chances of "naturally" getting pregnant after 38 were about 2%. You may feel young and act young, but your eggs just aren't.This is far more personal than I usually like to get on a public forum, but I have to interject my words of advice on this one. For all of you young ladies out there in your late 20s/early 30s who think you have plenty of time to have a child later, please consider the possibility that it may not be as easy for you to conceive as you think. Statistically, chances of conception begin to decrease after the age of 24.
I thought I had all of the time in the world to do what I wanted and start a family later. I married at 33 (husband was 38), we decided to stop trying NOT to get pregnant at 34, and then actively started trying 2 years later. At 39 we began seeing a fertility specialist. I am 40 and still do not have any children. Possibilities are pretty bleak at this point.
I just feel the need to impress this upon younger people who, like me, feel like they will be able to control their future and make things happen when they want. It's not always that easy. I have several friends in my same situation who would probably like to tell you the same thing.0 -
My oldest son is 21 and my girl baby is 23 months...they are 20 years apart! I had my daughter at 36 and my son at 17. I am also going to try for one more in the next few months....I just turned 38. So glad to see other ladies have also been of "advanced maternal age"....that term made me laugh whe I first heard it! :drinker:0
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I had my kids at 25, 27, 28, 30, 31 and 41.
I WIN!!! :drinker:
WOAH! :sick:0 -
I was 25 when I had my widdle babies. Boy/Girl twins.0
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I agree that you shouldn't wait TOO long to have children. I had my first (and only) at age 39. A year later, I hit menopause and found out I couldn't have any more children (I didn't have any eggs left). At least I have my daughter, and apparently I was very lucky to have had her!
However, I don't mind being an "older" mom. I have much more patience and understanding now than I did in my 20's. I would not have made a very good mom back then. I may be 42, but I'm right there with my 3-year-old on the monkey bars and crawling through the tunnels!0 -
I had my kids at 17, 20, and 23. I am now 32. My husband had the big v when our youngest was 4 months old. We were done. I'm VERY happy I had them young, I can not imagine just now starting to have kids.0
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I was 23 when I had my first, 25 when I had my second, 29 when I had my third, and 42 1/2 when I had my fourth. The best four sons a mother could hope for. But let me tell you, the weight is much harder to get off at 42 than 23.0
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my parents were 40 when they had me. my mom wanted another (would be her 4th child) but my dad didn't want that. i cant picture them having a 14 yr old right now anyway. my grandma is 89 years old, lives on her own with my grandpa, and works part time. they were like 50 when they had their last kid (of 12) O.O crazy stuff0
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My oldest son is 21 and my girl baby is 23 months...they are 20 years apart! I had my daughter at 36 and my son at 17. I am also going to try for one more in the next few months....I just turned 38. So glad to see other ladies have also been of "advanced maternal age"....that term made me laugh whe I first heard it! :drinker:
my brother is 20 years apart from me, and we have a great relationship. everyone is so shocked to find out though. its kinda weird having a 39 yr old brother when im in my 2nd year of college. but to me, he is just my older brother :]0 -
I know I am far from the oldest but I was 36 when I had my last child. 29 when I had my first. And 2 in between.
How old were you when you had your last one?
The mother of one of my son's friends has 8 kids. The oldest is like 40, and the youngest is 16 ( will be 17 in January). She was 42 or 43 when she had him....AND the last 2 times she was pregnant, she had a daughter or daughter in law pregnant at the same time!0 -
My oldest son is 21 and my girl baby is 23 months...they are 20 years apart! I had my daughter at 36 and my son at 17. I am also going to try for one more in the next few months....I just turned 38. So glad to see other ladies have also been of "advanced maternal age"....that term made me laugh whe I first heard it! :drinker:
my brother is 20 years apart from me, and we have a great relationship. everyone is so shocked to find out though. its kinda weird having a 39 yr old brother when im in my 2nd year of college. but to me, he is just my older brother :]
My sister is 22 years older than me... she is awesome. She's my big sis! Her children.. who are 1 year older than me, 1 year younger than me, and 4 years younger than me.. are like cousins more than aunt/niece or nephew.0 -
I had my three at 24, 26, and 28. I never wanted to have children after I turned 30. I wanted to be a young, energetic mom and still be in my forties when I was done raising children. I know now that that was the right decision for me. When I babysit my neices and nephews, I definitely don't have the same energy I had in my twenties to deal with toddlers. They always leave me relieved that I don't have to care for toddlers on a full-time basis at this stage in my life (I'm 40 now). I am so done with having children.0
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nothing like being a senior citizen at your kids High School graduation
My dad was 54. Died before I even got to high school. My mom was 28 and was pretty much low energy by the time she hit 40.
woooo. At 39, I have 1 kid in college and 1 kid starting 11th grade. Totally worth the evil glares of "oooh, you were TOO young to have kids, you bad girl! (mind you I got carded my first day of college I looked so ridiculously young. My neighbor is 50 and it's her daughter's last year of college.. she did ok, but not hi-energy.0 -
Well then I'm a freak of nature. IVF didn't work for us. I would conceive and then miscarry at 6 to 8 weeks. So after the last miscarriage, at 43, we gave up. Fast forward 4 months. Sick as a dog and no cycle since miscarriage. Doctor says come in...could have an infection from miscarriage. Nope. 4 months pregnant. "Spontaneous ovulation" and conceived naturally w/i 2 weeks of miscarrying. She shows up 2 months early, so I can say I had her at 43, and my sisters can say I had the easiest--"3 month" pregnancy.
But darn I'm tired.
This, this, THIS!! I got married at almost 40 for the first time, waited a year to try for a baby, thought it would be a cinch (I'm one of four, my sister has 5). We went through 2 cycles of IVF (4 and 6 years after we were married)...the second "took". According to my doctor, my chances of "naturally" getting pregnant after 38 were about 2%. You may feel young and act young, but your eggs just aren't.This is far more personal than I usually like to get on a public forum, but I have to interject my words of advice on this one. For all of you young ladies out there in your late 20s/early 30s who think you have plenty of time to have a child later, please consider the possibility that it may not be as easy for you to conceive as you think. Statistically, chances of conception begin to decrease after the age of 24.
I thought I had all of the time in the world to do what I wanted and start a family later. I married at 33 (husband was 38), we decided to stop trying NOT to get pregnant at 34, and then actively started trying 2 years later. At 39 we began seeing a fertility specialist. I am 40 and still do not have any children. Possibilities are pretty bleak at this point.
I just feel the need to impress this upon younger people who, like me, feel like they will be able to control their future and make things happen when they want. It's not always that easy. I have several friends in my same situation who would probably like to tell you the same thing.
Nice to hear a happy ending out of failed IVF. Took me four years (and one miscarriage) to have my beautiful daugther two weeks shy of my 37th birthday.0 -
not everyone "chooses" to wait so long to have kids, sometimes it happens that way because of when you finally meet someone worth having children with. my mom didnt meet someone who asked to marry her until she was 34 and she waited until marriage. I got married at 20, had 3 miscarriages with the husband and we divorced when i was 24, ill be getting married again next october at age 28 and will hopefully try again after being married for a while which will probably put me in my 30's before tryiing again, and not sure if its even going to be possible at that time but if i could be blessed with atleast 1 child, i would be so thankful and happy.0
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I agree. Not eveyone chooses to. I had wanted kids in my early 20's. I could've had them if I chose to marry the guy who asked me - but I wasn't ready for marriage then (I was 19). And I figured I had time. I got pregnant unexpectedly at 28 and was thrilled. After losing her, I was devasted but thought I still had time. Fast forward to now - 36 and can't have anymore kids without going through fertility treatments, which I can't because they aren't covered.
It sucks. Not all of us choose when to have kids, but I agree with the poster who said be careful abou thinking you have all this time.0 -
First of all, thanks so much for this post!!
My husband turned 32yrs on Monday and I'll be 33yrs 9/3. We have no children (we do have a furry super cute one!) We do want children, however in the almost 8years we've been together, we are just not ready. We talk about what we'll do and how we'lldo it, the challenges and the rewards. We both have older siblings and we were both surprises. My mother had me at 31yrs. I remember everyone else's mothers being younger. I do think it's a little different now. My father passed in 2007, when my mother passed in 2009 I thought it'd make me want kids sooner but it didn't. Our families ask all the time when are we having kids. We laugh and tell them we are just enjoying being married. I'm lucky enough to have open lines of communication with my husband. We have promised each other that when one of us feels ready, we'll tell the other. We do worry about gettingolder, this post makes me feel SO much better!!! I'm about to share this with my husband. Thanks again for posting!!
edit: We have also talked about adoption which we are not opposed to. We understand the risks to waiting.0 -
Anyone who gives birth over age 50 is selfish and doesnt care that they wont be in their childs life after they are in thier late 20s0
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30 and 330
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not everyone "chooses" to wait so long to have kids, sometimes it happens that way because of when you finally meet someone worth having children with. my mom didnt meet someone who asked to marry her until she was 34 and she waited until marriage. I got married at 20, had 3 miscarriages with the husband and we divorced when i was 24, ill be getting married again next october at age 28 and will hopefully try again after being married for a while which will probably put me in my 30's before tryiing again, and not sure if its even going to be possible at that time but if i could be blessed with atleast 1 child, i would be so thankful and happy.
True. My husband and I didn't get married until we were both 35, and weren't planning on having any children. Well, we got a little surprise 4 years later! She has brought such joy to our lives, even causing my husband to want another. Unfortunately I wasn't able to have any more, but we're so grateful for our little blessing.
Good luck to you, I hope you get your dream baby!0 -
nothing like being a senior citizen at your kids High School graduation
i'd rather that then have parents who look like they just finished a few years ago!
my grandmother started having kids at 17 and had her last at 48! (15 kids total) no prenatal care, all home births, zero birth defects in any of her kids or her 105 grand/ great-grand children!! (fertile irish folk)
Wow, thats awesome!0 -
Can we talk youngest? My cousin was a grandmother at 27....CRAZY hillbillies! :noway:
That's for Maury or Jerry!
:laugh:0 -
I'm 24, my parents were 40 and 42 when they adopted me!
Awww, thats nice!0 -
I was 17, 21, 25, 27, 29..0
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29,32,34,36,390
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I'm 41 and have a 24 year old... and a 2 year old. It's funny when we go places now people think my youngest son is my grandson. (Thankfully, I am NOT a grandma yet)0
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Not a mother yet myself but my mother was 43 when she had me and I'm first of 3 children.
wow!! there is hope for me then! I'm 38 with none yet0 -
Can we talk youngest? My cousin was a grandmother at 27....CRAZY hillbillies! :noway:
Doesn't make sense. Lets say she had her daughter when she was 15. That would make her daughter atleast 12 when she got pregnant.0 -
nothing like being a senior citizen at your kids High School graduation
nice....very rude0 -
I just turned 18 when I had my first,but he was stillborn. Then I waited til I was 28 to have the next. My youngest was born when I was 34. My Mom thought I was too old to have that one.0
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