embarrassment after losing weight?

Mdin1029

So glad to hear how many others feels this way. I also was playing it down and saying things like "you think" Now I just do what someone said, have programmed response "yeah i've been trying to be healthier" It is super weird when people ask how much weight you have lost though, or ask "have you lost weight?"

sparklelioness

I think you need some new 'closer friends', to be honest.

commanderthomas

A lot of these responses are kinda weird to me. Not being embarrassed about the compliments as much as some of the people who seem angry or offended by them? Seems pretty backward to me. Personally, I'm pretty proud of every pound I've lost and continue to lose, and my favorite topic of conversation is how having the mobile app of myfitnesspal helped me to do it. Already got 10 friends signed on. Though I do understand others being kind of shy about it.

But geez, little did I know I could piss someone off for supporting them and telling them they're doing a good job of working towards their goal. I'll keep that in mind when I'm cheering the runners on at the local 10k next week.

opuntia

I think any major change to your body makes you self-conscious, because people are looking at you and reacting to it, and your appearance becomes the centre of attention for a while.

I lost a bit of weight over the holidays, and when I went back to work I did wonder if people would notice and comment - and I was quite relieved that they didn't! I'm not embarrassed as such, but I prefer to focus on work and just blend in.

MissSusieQ

i've felt exactly the same. i work with a lady who couldn't leave it at 'you've lost weight' or 'you look good', it was always 'how much weight have you lost?' or even 'so what do you weigh now?', and even when i tried to give her vague, you're-making-me-uncomfortable answers, she'd keep at it.
i tried just telling myself that she's complimenting me, she means well, and she's just being her nice in her sort of in-your-face way, but it didn't change the fact that she made me feel really awkward!
in the end, i just started avoiding stopping for long talks with her for a while, till the newness of my weight loss wore off. it wasn't her fault, it wasn't mine.

MissSusieQ

Yes, I do get embarrassed because I don't like to draw attention to myself and the other day I got downright irritated at a Facebook friend who said she "didn't recognize me". The intention was kind, I am sure, but I am not "unrecognizable" dropping from a tight size 14 to a proper fitting 12. C'mon! Plus, it made me feel like I was Jabba the Hutt before. :-). I dunno, I guess I don't respond well to compliments from others?

ha ha, i had exactly the same thing happen!
I lost about 15kg quite quickly a few years back, and the change made me the talk of my work for a few weeks (particularly since i did a lot of the dramatic shape-changing while on holiday from work).
One of the girls i work with said to me one day 'you've lost a lot of weight Susan, you look great' - big compliment - but then followed it with 'i was looking back at photos from Jane's wedding and you were like *puffed out cheeks, wide arms, fat pose*'
i was like, 'um.. thanks? i think?'

NoSharpei

I dn't get embarrassed by my weight loss.. but I am taking time to get used to it. I recently referred to myself as overweight in a conversation. The woman I was talking to said, "..but you're not fat!" I was a bit confused until I looked hard in the mirror later in the day. I USED to be fat... but, because it's still me... just 60lbs less of me, I still have more or less the same mental image of myself!

bassmanlarry

My dad is constantly telling me I look sick and my my keeps saying I need to stop where I'm at. They complain about they can't lose weight, but then my mom keeps 200+ calorie snacks and ice cream bars around the house.

jerber160

someone told me I was 'sexy' the other day.. having never been sexy, I stammered a thank you and said, "I don't usually look like this." but if they tell me I look good, I can only smile and say thanks,, cos it's FUN to be this way

MarincicS

I feel exactly the same way and like a few other responses here, i think it's more embarrassment about how i looked before (although i still have a long way to go so to an extent, i am still embarrassed about how i look now). I took so much trouble to dress and walk and move as carefully as i could before so no one would notice i was obese. When they mention my weight loss now, they are saying they noticed all along i was so fat. Damn!! I'd thought i was hiding it so well.

I have a few quite sensitive friends who say "you look great," as opposed to saying "you lost weight." That is so much easier to hear as it is non-specific and they could actually be talking about my new haircut or eyelash extensions . . . right?

Anyway, as yucky as that feeling is, it's MUCH better than being embarrassed AND fat! So soldier through and keep rocking the good health and fitness!!

paprs

I feel the same way sometimes. Recently a friend asked me if I was done losing weight, and when I told her I still had 40 more lbs to lose (my BMI still puts me at 'obese'), she seemed concerned and told me I didn't need to keep losing.

Just know that you're doing what's right for you. My response to my friend was, "I'm still not at a healthy weight, and my goal is to be in the best shape of my life." You'll find that a lot of people discourage you from your efforts because they feel guilty about their own lifestyles or wish they were on the same path as you.

Keep it up, you're doing great!

opuntia

Here is an interesting link: http://www.succeedfoundation.org/work/fat_talk_free_week

They say that 'Seemingly innocent comments like, "You look so good! Have you lost weight?" Or, "You look really thin in that outfit! I love it!" often fuel unhealthy body image and feed the notion that people only look good if they lose weight.'

blg5

When I first started to lose the weight I was discouraged that no one noticed. Then when they started noticing I felt proud. It wasn't till recently that is started becoming kind of embarrising. I think the fact that I let myself get so big and now I'm having to undo all the damage I've done to my body is a little humiliating. I totally get what you are going thru.

sandyyy712

yeah i had it bad. everyone i saw was making backhanded comments about it. it made me so uncomfortable that i ended up gaining quite a bit of the weight back... just dont let them get to you

nikig7

Wow I actually read through all of your comments. Thing is...I am not a "success story" yet as far as weight loss goes but it really helps to read about all of your experiences and begin to prepare myself mentally for the comments....good, bad and UGLY. I did lose about 30lbs about 6 years ago and i got all sorts of comments like "you look sick" or "not everybody looks good thin (mind you i was NOTTTT THIN!), "you don't look good, you look better with a little flesh"...or the best/worst one...."you betta stop or people will start thinking you have IT (aka HIV/AIDS :noway: )...and subconsciously i let all of that get to me and here I am, struggling to lose after regaining those 30 lbs and about 10 more!!!

I'm finding it much harder to lose the weight now...but being patient with it and trying to get my mind in the right place to not let people and some of the insensitive things they say cause me to sabotage my health yet another time...thanks to all of you for sharing!!!

jhigg11

I feel like it's going from being invisible at least nobody is checking you out in your mind, to being looked at and everybody has something to say. I try to talk about how great I feel, and not about how I look. I think getting comfortable and real about why this happened can be like therapy. We all gained for a reason. Now we people say I look great, I say thank you so much for noticing, I feel really great, and I say it with a huge smile.

rubyjune27

I have had quite different experiences to most posters here. I am probably one of those people who irritate you! I love talking to other people about their weight loss, I am genuinely impressed and interested. When people comment about my weight loss although I am a bit embarrassed and tell them I still have more to lose, I always hear there comments as a compliment. When the occasional person suggests that I do not need to lose anymore, I just thank them, I assumed they just are not used to seeing me as slim. When I get to goal weight I am looking forward to the compliments and talking in detail until I bore the pants of people. after all I have worked bloomin hard.

half_moon

I understand being embarrassed, getting used to the changes you've made for your body is a process. Today I was at the grocery store and got checked out by 2 different guys and was mortified. It's definitely not a bad thing, just new and hopefully something I can get used to. You should be proud of what you've done for yourself and do not listen to the people who aren't!

Hahaha the first time I put on my pair of 8s, I walked into a Subway and every guy's head turned. Believe me, this doesn't happen to me!! If it wouldn't have been weird, I would have jumped and shouted happy obscenities right then and there. Enjoy your new confidence!! It's an amazing feeling.

smithntuck

Most people who are my age or younger want to know what I'm doing to lose the weight that I have, and I was embarrassed at first, I guess because I was going to a bariatric clinic and had to have "help" losing the weight. Now I just tell them...tell them how much it costs, how long I have been going, any info they want. The only thing that bothers me is when older people make comments like "you're going to make yourself sick" or "You need to stop losing, you've lost enough already". I've gotten to the point where I tell them how much I weigh, and how much the Dr. said I should weigh...Dr. being the main point. It seems as long as I have a Dr's approval for my weight loss, it's ok? lol