Parents at fault for overweight children?

AmyLyn1983

I agree that parents play a big role. I used to work at a fast food place and I remember we had quite a few regulars. One woman and her two daughters I will never forget. I'm sure this may surprise some ppl (then again, maybe it won't) but that woman brought her kids in everyday, usually twice a day. The oldest girl couldn't have been older than 13 and the youngest maybe 7 or 8. Their mother was a very overweight woman, yet she always ordered (no joke) and double quarter pounder w/ cheese and large fries. Plus the meals for her two girls. The oldest was overweight as well, easily by 50lbs. She always looked so sad. I felt so badly for her. Sometimes I wanted to shake that woman and yell "Can't you see what you're doing to your children? You're killing them slowly with your bad habits!!"
That was several yrs ago. I'd be curious to see where those girls are now and how their health is.

ChristineDiet

Unless there is some genetic problem then yeah - totally the parents fault (up until these reach high school and kids are making their own choices - but by then hopefully there habits that you teach them early on will stick). All too many times I've heard parents saying "he won't eat anything other than chicken nuggets and chips so that's what I give him". I'm sorry but if my children asked for chicken nuggets and chips they wouldn't get it, maybe once in a blue moon, but they get a proper meal, they eat what we adults eat and learn from an early age that you have to 'try'.

I have heard kids playing 'restaurants' and there are kids who say "what would you like, pizza, chips, sausage' my son was playing this game yesterday and he said "what would you like, fish, prawns, chicken, rice" - that's the kind of food he's grown up with - I even blended it when I was weaning him. so yeah totally down to the parents. x

LittleMissDover

Apple 100% correct.... mother 100% wrong. Should be classed as child abuse in cases like that.

I detest how flippantly some people use the word abuse. :explode:

I see both sides, yes the child was asking for a healthy snack however, as PP's have said, perhaps that child had eaten a ton of fruit already and the mother wanted her to have some carbs and protein. My middle child would snack all day (on fruit) and not eat a proper meal which I don't think is a healthy eating habit so I would also tell her not she can't have fruit if dinner is due soon, mostly that dinner is healthy but sometimes it's pizza, after she's eaten that she can eat fruit and yogurt to her heart's content.

My youngest would live on fruit and veg and it's a struggle to get any carbs or protein in to her so again, she'd be denied fruit close to dinner time too.

You can't judge this one situation from the snippet you saw.

Having said that, I do agree that if children are overweight at an age where they don't have access to money and the ability to buy their own food it is the parents' fault, I may be overweight but my children certainly aren't, I have made a huge effort to not pass my bad relationship with food onto them.

Claremarie1987

I blame Nana for all those goodies she used to stock up on, nom nom

bathsheba_c

Also, chubbiness is sometimes a sign of a growth spurt on the way. I'm taking the mom's side here; we don't have any information on what the child ate the rest of the day, or how she would eat if left in complete control of her diet.

By the way, hamburgers aren't all that unhealthy by themselves. They become unhealthy if you cover them in cheese, fried onions, and bacon and serve them with fries and a soda.

grrrlface

I was never overweight as a child, I had 3 meals a day with my parents, snacks if we were hungry. Only sweets/chocolate if we behaved.
My problem was I had to finish everything on my plate, as I got older and my portion sizes got bigger that was imprinted on my brain that if I didn't eat the food on my plate, I was wasting it! That and I started drinking like 3 times a week through college.

I do think parents are partly to blame. Kids can always sneak snacks when the parents aren't looking! My brother used to (even though he's always been thin as a rake!)

Regarding the OP, if I was that mother, I would've let her have an apple. She would just have a smaller portion at dinner, especially if it were burgers!! I think refusing your child a healthy snack over encouraging a fatty dinner is setting them up for a bad lifestyle when they're older.
Of course, we don't know the whole story, she may be usually very healthy and the burgers were just a treat.

blackcoffeeandcherrypie

Hmm, a bit of both. It's clear that some parents do encourage unhealthy food choices and they are to blame. But I don't think any parent intentionally gives their child a weight problem, they just do the best they can with the resources available to them, and sometimes those resources are lacking a little. Not enough knowledge about food, not enough money, not enough time, etc. I was fat even as a small child, so obviously it wasn't just my own fault, but neither of my parents were fat, most of my family were very thin so clearly their eating habits worked for them. Also I grew up in the era of the F plan, my mother thought she was doing the right thing stuffing me full of carbs and limiting what she was told was fatty meat and dairy. We were very poor and potatoes were a lot cheaper than expensive cuts of meat. It's easy to see the problems in hindsight but like any parent she did the best with what she had at the time. I don't think it's fair to 'blame' parents who are trying their best. I think sometimes life just hands you a bum card and you have to work around it. Yes I have a weight problem, but I also have a love of reading and education. What you get from your parents is always going to be a mixed bag, I don't think it's fair to put too much emphasis on what they get wrong, they are only human after all.

mgmlap

I am a firm believer that parents are 100% responsible for their child till they turn 18. I eat healthy...but that doesnt mean I dont indulge. I have taught my kids how to eat. They love yogurt with berries..and I pack their lunches every day..and yes..they are (almost) 13 and 16 yr old girls.

They prefer water over soda/juice...when my oldest goes out to lunch to McDonalds cause of friends..she gets a salad...I have fruit the house..if they want a snack..they grab the jalapeno cheese and have a few crackers.

My daughters have learned..since I have been on my journey..that you have to watch what you eat..but it doesnt mean you starve yourself. I let them know when I have carb bloat..and I let them know when I am caught by zombies while on my run..I engage them during my journey..and they get excited for me...

We went out to dinner Saturday..my kid wanted clam chowder..I had her get some other protein with it (shrimp) so that she had a balanced meal.

I do agree..kids are kids..but I do have confidence that my children do make smart decisions with food as well as life choices when I am not around..