How do you know when its time to break it off?

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  • Tangerine302
    Tangerine302 Posts: 1,509 Member
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    Since it sounds like it's pretty new news, I would just see how things go. Initial reactions sometimes aren't the ones long term. It's a lot to take, a lot to think about, etc. I'm sure for you too. Going from 2 to 4, figuring out how everything is going to work out within your household, etc. I would say just do what you need to do for the kids. Time will tell whether everyone will be included in the raising part. I just want to say thank you for having such a good heart to take care of your sister's kids. I'm sure it means the world to them. To be that young and to have to go through something like this certainly is a scare, shock, etc. Knowing that their aunt is caring for them I'm sure gives them hope and security.

    I would say just give it time to settle. It may work out very nicely! :)
    Take care and hugs to you!
  • iFeelBrandNew
    iFeelBrandNew Posts: 263 Member
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    Look at it this way... anything worth having is worth working for. So if you really want to be with this person, you keep trying until THEY give up or until it no longer brings you personal joy & fulfillment. You don't just break it off because things get rough. The comments saying "If it's hard, it's not worth it" are the mentality that explain why we have such an insanely high divorce rate now. Nobody wants to work for anything. But think about it... you're on a fitness site. That shows you know you need to WORK to achieve your goals. Same concept in a relationship.

    this is perfect. you are absolutely right. i guess no relationship is sunshine and flowers all the time...
  • iFeelBrandNew
    iFeelBrandNew Posts: 263 Member
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    Since it sounds like it's pretty new news, I would just see how things go. Initial reactions sometimes aren't the ones long term. It's a lot to take, a lot to think about, etc. I'm sure for you too. Going from 2 to 4, figuring out how everything is going to work out within your household, etc. I would say just do what you need to do for the kids. Time will tell whether everyone will be included in the raising part. I just want to say thank you for having such a good heart to take care of your sister's kids. I'm sure it means the world to them. To be that young and to have to go through something like this certainly is a scare, shock, etc. Knowing that their aunt is caring for them I'm sure gives them hope and security.

    I would say just give it time to settle. It may work out very nicely! :)
    Take care and hugs to you!

    thank you so much. time is obviously what i need.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
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    no one, but you can answer that question. How much it is worth to you? How much does the bad outweigh the good or vice versa? Could you see yourself without this person for the rest of your life? Could you see yourself with them for the rest of your life? Is there any room for compromises from both parties, etc.? Have you flat out asked him if he is gone once the other 2 children move in or are you making assumptions?

    i assume he'll be gone. he says he wants to see how it goes, but im such a pessimist that i only see what could potentially happen on the negative side of things. plus, my attitude lately totally sucks since ive put my walls back up upon hearing that he 50/50 supports me. i understand that in a relationship, although it is a partnership you have to do whats best for yourself. and im not thinking that whats best for him is me anymore. i guess i feel like i would be holding him back now.


    at this point, you need to do not what is bst for you, but for the 4 kids involved. You don't want someone in and out of their lives, especially your sisters kids who will be, if aren't already going through enough.
  • djsupreme6
    djsupreme6 Posts: 1,210 Member
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    well hard to say what's gonna happen...but I do believe its whatever is in the kids best interest...I can only imagine what they're going and have gone through...if it were me...there would be no talk or anything needed...they're coming and i'm gonna do my best to support her and all the kids involved...I call it unconditional
  • idaman76
    idaman76 Posts: 40
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    Just remember...if you truly love someone, let them go. If they don't come back, go find them and kill 'em.
    I think I'll take that advice myself lmao
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,041 Member
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    Once you get the feeling... it's over. There's no rectifying.

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